Carolinas

When a date goes overtime ...
TylerCannon 1673 reads
posted

Recently, I enjoyed a two-hour date with a touring provider who was visiting Raleigh.  We were having a great time, and when I noticed there were only about 10 minutes left until our time was up, I suggested that we start to finish up.  At that point, she said something along the lines of "Don't worry about it, just relax and have fun."  It was an evening date and she said that she didn't have anyone else booked after me.  I am normally very careful not to overstay my allotted time.  Anyway, we continued playing, and when we were done, she continued making conversation with me and invited me to take a shower.  It felt like she was in no hurry at all for me to go.  By the time I left, it was about 30 minutes past the time our date was supposed to end.

I thought it all went very well, and we even talked about meeting again the next time she'll be in town.  As I do after most first dates, I sent her an Okay request on P411 the next day.  She has not responded to it, and she didn't respond to an email that I sent thanking her and asking to see her again.

So now I'm a bit worried that I may have upset her by staying too long.  She didn't say anything about it, and she doesn't have any "overtime" policy on her web site, but should I have added more to my donation?  I did put an extra $40 in the envelope as a tip (before the date started) but that isn't equal to the donation for an extra half hour of her time.  If she said anything about it, I'd gladly make it up to her on our next date, but she hasn't said anything so I'm not sure if it's an issue or not.

I feel bad, as I try to be very respectful of a provider's time.  What do the ladies here think?  If this situation happened with one of your clients, would you be upset about it?  Would you say something to him?  Do you always expect an extra donation if a date goes overtime?  How should I handle things if this situation happens again in the future?

You acknowledged that your time was almost up. And you said you had already included a tip in the envelope beforehand. If she told you not to worry about the time then don't worry about the time. That's on her. She said she didn't have any one else scheduled after you and to just relax and enjoy. You shouldn't feel obligated to leave her extra money. It's a nice gesture of course. But personally if do that and tell someone not to worry about what time it is, I don't expect extra $. And would never want the client to feel pressured. If i wanted a few extra bucks I'd be all sweet and have the "would you like to extend the date" talk lol. If the provider tells you not to worry about the clock then don't. That simple.  

As far as not replying to your email and P411 request, well- how long has it been? A day? A few days? A week? She's probably been busy. Or of course there's also the possibility that was hoping for more $ from you after you stayed longer, but again, that's her problem. NOT yours. If she hasn't responded yet, move on. Don't waste your time worrying about it

TylerCannon387 reads

Thanks, Gabby!

It has been 11 days since the date.  I know she's busy, but I've never had a provider not give me an "Okay" so it made me wonder if I did something that made me not "Okay".  I already felt conscientious about staying late, and that's the only reason I could think of that she wouldn't have been happy with me.

I'll just let it go ... but along these lines, I am wondering, are there any typical reasons why you or other providers might choose not to give someone an "Okay" on P411 if he requests it after the date?

I give an okay as long as everything went as it should- I wasn't raped, robbed, shorted/ripped off completely, arrested, manhandled, generally disrespected, you get the idea lol.  Sometimes you meet and just don't have good mutual chemistry. But it's a YMMV situation and so not reason to not give a reference.  If she offered for you to stay longer you don't owe her jack. And therefore it's not a legit reason to not give you an okay. Seriously, move on. It's not worth driving yourself crazy over

TylerCannon181 reads

Thanks so much for all of your feedback ... I hope that those reasons for not giving an OK that you listed are extremely rare - or that they never happen at all.  It blows my mind  anyone could possibly do something to hurt any provider ... you all deserve to be adored and treated with the same charm and class that you consistently show to us guys!

Since the gal in question tours she probally is just busy with working out the logistics of her next tour stop. Or she's made it home and is taking a few days doing "real life" things.  
To me it sounds like you're "date" went really well, the two of you got along well obviously and she enjoyed you're company. The only recommendation I would make is next time something like this happens with a gal that's all alone in a strange city is maybe be a gentleman and offer to take her to dinner. OTC of course if you two are getting along. No harm in asking ya both gotta eat anyways and no one likes to eat alone. Yeah someone may say that's taking advantage but it happens quite frequently.  Sometimes dates go over when both of ya have fun, one more reason I like outcall it takes that question out of the equation, the gal will leave when she's ready.  

I'm sure you're lady friend will be in touch when she returns.

I agree with the others, You were a gentleman and cannot see any fault. some girls are just slow to respond. Relax and enjoy life!

You did your part, she made a conscious decision to go over the time and did not ask for anything extra.  
The way I see it is unless we discuss an additional donation I don't expect it. There has been times where we were wrapped up and went over time not even realizing it and my date adds more, I appreciate that, but, I don't expect it. When the time is talked about and I choose to stay longer without asking for more and my date adds more I always find myself wondering if he felt obligated to. I don't want anyone to feel any pressure. If I don't ask, don't worry.  

She is probably busy or taking time off and just hasn't had an opportunity to respond. When I take time off I don't even look at my phone or check my email.  
If by some chance she is upset, that's her problem.

TylerCannon279 reads

Thanks, Tylor (my feminine namesake, haha)

I always try to do things that are a bit above and beyond what a provider expects, to let her know how much she is appreciated (and selfishly, to put me in her good graces!)  I usually don't carry any extra cash with me on an in-call date, but maybe I should in case this situation ever arises again.

But my question to you is, how does this work logistically?  Let's say I'm lucky enough to be on a date with you, and we're having so much fun calling out each other's names that we lose track of time and I end up departing a half hour later than we planned.  I don't talk about the donation envelope at all, I just set it down when I first enter the room.  If I want to give you an extra donation for the extra time, how should I do that?  I'm not going to have an extra envelope with me (or maybe I should bring one?) and I don't want to just hand it to you ... so how should it be done?

My ideal solution, which avoids this conundrum, would be to just schedule another date and give an extra generous tip or a nice gift as a thank you.

You could always excuse yourself to the restroom one more time just before you leave and leave the donation (sans envelope) on the vanity next to the sink. I had a gentleman do that for me once and I thought it was a sweet gesture. She will most definitely be going in there after you leave to freshen up, so no worries that she wont see it.

I actually had a situation where a date went over, neither of us realized till we were done. I didnt say anything about an upcharge but my date wanted to. He actually had extra envelopes and he tried to discreatly start a fresh envelope with the new total amount. Ended up getting the envelopes confused and asking me for the one I ended up with back. It turned to a bit of a production and was no where near discreet in the end lol. I thought it was sweet, but really, by that time we don't have anything to worry about w each other, we know the money exists, its not the end of the world if its acknowledged. You can just put some cash under the envelope, or on the vanity in the bathroom, or the nightstand, anywhere she'll see it or that she will see you put it down. Ive had people hand it directly to me. Whatever your comfortable doing. I highly doubt she'll be upset that she saw you put money out in the open somewhere and would have preferred that you just didn't give her any extra so she didn't have to see that.  

It's sweet that your considerate enough to think about stuff like this :)
 

Posted By: TylerCannon
Thanks, Tylor (my feminine namesake, haha)  
   
 I always try to do things that are a bit above and beyond what a provider expects, to let her know how much she is appreciated (and selfishly, to put me in her good graces!)  I usually don't carry any extra cash with me on an in-call date, but maybe I should in case this situation ever arises again.  
   
 But my question to you is, how does this work logistically?  Let's say I'm lucky enough to be on a date with you, and we're having so much fun calling out each other's names that we lose track of time and I end up departing a half hour later than we planned.  I don't talk about the donation envelope at all, I just set it down when I first enter the room.  If I want to give you an extra donation for the extra time, how should I do that?  I'm not going to have an extra envelope with me (or maybe I should bring one?) and I don't want to just hand it to you ... so how should it be done?  
   
 My ideal solution, which avoids this conundrum, would be to just schedule another date and give an extra generous tip or a nice gift as a thank you.

You did nothing wrong at all IMO! And you may hear from her as others have said! You sound like a super considerate gentleman to me!

Steph xoxo

Posted By: TylerCannon
Recently, I enjoyed a two-hour date with a touring provider who was visiting Raleigh.  We were having a great time, and when I noticed there were only about 10 minutes left until our time was up, I suggested that we start to finish up.  At that point, she said something along the lines of "Don't worry about it, just relax and have fun."  It was an evening date and she said that she didn't have anyone else booked after me.  I am normally very careful not to overstay my allotted time.  Anyway, we continued playing, and when we were done, she continued making conversation with me and invited me to take a shower.  It felt like she was in no hurry at all for me to go.  By the time I left, it was about 30 minutes past the time our date was supposed to end.  
   
 I thought it all went very well, and we even talked about meeting again the next time she'll be in town.  As I do after most first dates, I sent her an Okay request on P411 the next day.  She has not responded to it, and she didn't respond to an email that I sent thanking her and asking to see her again.  
   
 So now I'm a bit worried that I may have upset her by staying too long.  She didn't say anything about it, and she doesn't have any "overtime" policy on her web site, but should I have added more to my donation?  I did put an extra $40 in the envelope as a tip (before the date started) but that isn't equal to the donation for an extra half hour of her time.  If she said anything about it, I'd gladly make it up to her on our next date, but she hasn't said anything so I'm not sure if it's an issue or not.  
   
 I feel bad, as I try to be very respectful of a provider's time.  What do the ladies here think?  If this situation happened with one of your clients, would you be upset about it?  Would you say something to him?  Do you always expect an extra donation if a date goes overtime?  How should I handle things if this situation happens again in the future?

So I don't think that would be it. Especially not if she responded to the time as you said she did. As other have said, you brought it up. The time that is. She is a grown woman whomever she is. So if she does feel upset about that, she only has herself to blame without question. As far as the Okay and the no response. Who knows. Okays are usually quick but who knows exactly why you have not heard from her. Too many variables absent for you to know.  No one here can really help. Only speculate. Which won't help you! So just let it escape your mind! Exit Left! You did your part as a gent well! IMO and what others have said too it looks like.

maybe she just hasn't checked her emails yet for whatever reason.
Communication seems like it was clear from both of you and the tip before hand even tells a bigger story of the gentleman you are.
Relax no worries.

and don't really have anything to be concerned about.

Seriously, you booked a certain amount of time and covered it up front - with a tip no less. You followed up with a thank you and a request to book again. You weren't trying to stay over time and take advantage of her; in essence (if not in so many words) she asked you to stay and relax or enjoy more time with her.

If later she had a concern that things were misinterpreted in some way, she could find a way to let you know and give you the opportunity to make it up to her on that repeat date. Clearly, she enjoyed your time together and just as clearly you did - to the point that you were eager to repeat.  

Spending a little extra time with someone like this certainly isn't something to expect, but it does happen from time to time. It's a nice thing and should be enjoyed by both, not something to be stressed over.

As for not receiving an OK or email response... there a many possible reasons that have nothing to do with her feeling upset with you. I've forgotten to ask for OKs before, often don't update them and have had OKs happen months after I've met a lady. Again, not something to get anxious about.  

Have fun, forget the stress. You can't control everything.

Welcome to the world of "low volume" ladies.

Low volume is one of the most disputed terminologies ever on any hooker discussion board.
One common retort I have heard about it is, (tongue in cheek here)
Low volume: When you don't see another guy leaving as you enter, or entering as you leave.

LOL!

In all seriousness, not all ladies run their business like a "puppymill"- and generally, in that mindset-
We don't offer "quick visit" specials... We do charge high rates for our time, however, with that in mind, we don't HAVE to book X amount of appointments a day, and often as not, I myself, do not have another date even booked that day.
So when the clock runs out, and if I am "having myself a ball"- (and I don't have to rush home to the pack of wolves)...
If I find I have a wee bit of extra time & Mr. Client is also Mr. Cool- hey, why not chill for a bit & enjoy this precious time together, on me!  
Providers are also human, and sometimes, we just click with our clients...
When that happens... it is truly a beautiful thing.
Take it for the golden moment it is.

No you don't "owe" her.

And okays.... well, sometimes, us ladies get behind with "online stuff"-
I wouldn't sweat it AT ALL.

Here's to those Golden Moments in HobbyWorld!

And remember..... OTC (off the clock time) is like fight club....
When you review... it doesn't exist!
(Wouldn't want every gentleman to think he is as special as you are, now would we?)

;)

Fox

You are a good writer, and very well said.
In fact, there are quite a few girls that will only take one date per day. In our case, EVERY girl is like that. So your view is dead on as far as I am concerned!

Rufus-T-Firefly230 reads

Here's what I wonder: Say it's the end of my time. We've had a really good physical session, and now I'm having a really nice time just talking and getting to know her better. She shows no sense that it's time for me to go. I'm aware that it is, but I wonder, maybe she's lonely here in this hotel room all by herself, and maybe she would just like to have some company for another 15 or 20 minutes. Or maybe she really needs me to leave so she can get on with whatever she needs to do.  

Is there a way to ask which it is without sounding like I'm trying to get something for nothing, or without putting her on the spot?

I was actually about to type about OTC being the ladies choice when I saw your post. Since I just would have been quoting you anyway it's good I saw yours first :)

TylerCannon209 reads

I was a bit worried when I saw your subject line and then very relieved when I read what you said!

I really like hearing your take on things on this board, Foxy.  Your way with words seems like a good demonstration of how fun you'd be to hang out with!  If I ever find myself near Rocky Mount, I'll show just how Mr. Cool I am :)

TylerCannon174 reads

Thanks to all of the kind responses to this post.  I thought some of you might like to know that I received a very nice email from the provider today ... she apologized for taking so long to get back to me, but she hadn't checked her email since she left Raleigh - just like a few of you had surmised.  She said some very kind things about our time together and she approved my P411 Okay.

I really appreciate all of the insight from the ladies about this, and the guys who chimed in too.  In the end, it makes me a smarter, wiser, and happier hobbyist!

Oh ... and one more thing.  I saw another provider yesterday and asked to extend the session from 60 to 90 minutes ... and when I did, I used Katymarie and Tylor's advice on how to discreetly add my extra donation.  I'm not afraid to admit that at least part of my reason for extending was to try this out :

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