If you don't like someone's screening process, just move on. While it's odd she interviewed you prior to screening you, the info she asked for isn't unusual to ask for, regardless of what type of session you're interested in.
If you don't like it, move on. You don't have to give info you're not comfortable giving, but if you want to see her, that's what you'll have to do.So here is the background:
Me, been a switch here in a big city for years and seen a good number of dommes/subs
So I see website for a new domme in late 2015. Part of her screening is having a in person interview. So I contact her to set something up. It took a while and a lot of emails(she kept flaking out, late responses) which should have been a warning flag. But any ways I finally meet her in person, met for about an hour, had a good time talking about our experiences and such.
But anyways she contacts me about scheduling a session. So I gave her time, she says is waiting on her confirmation for the dungeon rental. She writes backs again, wants to know my profession title, gave it to her. She then asks the company for who I work for, I send her that. She writes again, saying she can't verify me, I gave her a work email address and LinkedIn as she requested. She writes back, says she wants me to send a pic of myself, which I found to be really weird, since. I met her in person.
So BDSM buddies out there, am I being paranoid that something else is brewing here(blackmail or something) or she covering her bases?? Like I said been doing this for years and never this much verification or at least inconsistency, I know regular providers want a lot of verification, but given this session I was to be a sub, tied and gagged and her the domme
-- Modified on 2/25/2016 9:34:46 PM
Having met, I would wonder why she needs my employer etc after we met and would not have been forth coming. Now a picture would be out of the question giving everything you have already done.
It sounds to me that she doesn't really know how to be a prodomme. No problem with renting the dungeon, although you can have a very nice playdate without one.
You have gone above and beyond with providing info. Find someone who is well reviewed on TER or has a presence on FetLife and avoid all of this BS.
Let us know how you made out.
It's interesting is that she has a fetlife and actual homepage, no reviews though, I won't be replying back to her anymore as I think pretty much turned off at this point and it's become too much work, which defeats the purpose of the whole thing
Yes, I would meet in person to determine common interests & attraction. But I never give my real info to anyone, especially on first meet and would definitely not provide a photo. TER/P411/DC exist for the provider to evaluate hobbyists.
I think over time if you see someone 5 or more times personal info gets mixed in with the endorphin induced conversation. But a level of trust has been established after multiple encounters.
Good Luck! She may be new at this and fumbling her way though the process
If you don't like someone's screening process, just move on. While it's odd she interviewed you prior to screening you, the info she asked for isn't unusual to ask for, regardless of what type of session you're interested in.
If you don't like it, move on. You don't have to give info you're not comfortable giving, but if you want to see her, that's what you'll have to do.
Maybe she has a bad memory, or not very savvy. Go with your gut..
Me, been a switch here in a big city for years and seen a good number of dommes/subs
So I see website for a new domme in late 2015. Part of her screening is having a in person interview. So I contact her to set something up. It took a while and a lot of emails(she kept flaking out, late responses) which should have been a warning flag. But any ways I finally meet her in person, met for about an hour, had a good time talking about our experiences and such.
But anyways she contacts me about scheduling a session. So I gave her time, she says is waiting on her confirmation for the dungeon rental. She writes backs again, wants to know my profession title, gave it to her. She then asks the company for who I work for, I send her that. She writes again, saying she can't verify me, I gave her a work email address and LinkedIn as she requested. She writes back, says she wants me to send a pic of myself, which I found to be really weird, since. I met her in person.
So BDSM buddies out there, am I being paranoid that something else is brewing here(blackmail or something) or she covering her bases?? Like I said been doing this for years and never this much verification or at least inconsistency, I know regular providers want a lot of verification, but given this session I was to be a sub, tied and gagged and her the domme
-- Modified on 2/25/2016 9:34:46 PM
If you want to see a particular lady- domme or not, you must please her prior to meeting. I agree that it may be odd to be re-screened. She is probably unaware she is doing it would be my assumption, but it would be worth clarifying directly with her.
For me it's odd that she agreed to meet you first to then go throw the screening process later, but the work information is not unusual in screening forms.
I always screen my new clients and if someone is not comfortable to give me their personal information, they are welcome to move on to the next professional (or not so professional, for lacking on screening). Having a proper screening process shows you that the provider in question don't just see everybody that contacts her and is safety conscious.
No matter how much money I am offered, I NEVER see a gentleman that won't tell me who he is. Being whitelisted or TER, having OKs on P411 and other forums are helpful because you won't have to give me other provider's referral or work information if you have enough OK's from reputable professionals, but your personal information is still required. I would never put myself in private quarters (for an escort or BDSM session) with someone that won't tell me who he is and might have a criminal history.