Everyone needs to make their own decisions. The ladies will welcome you back if and when you are ready to resume. It's actually a really nice thing about the "hobby" - unlike real life - you can always come back.
I haven't been hobbying long, a little over a year. It was a bit of a second adolence in a lot of ways for me. I never had much sexual experience beyond my monogamous relationship until I tried hobbying. I have a lot of mixed and confusing feelings about my decision hobbying, but one thing is for certain, is the personal growth I have experiehced with the women I have met and spent time with doing this. It opened a side of me that had been pent up for awhile, and hobbying allowed me to express it in a setting where I didn't need to feel ashamed or scared.
I have decided to take a break from it because I'm certain that I have fallen hard for one of the providers I see. I've tried seeing other providers to break away from my feelings for her, but in the end I am just absolutely crazy about her. No one in my personal or professional life know about my hobbying, all I have to seek for advice is this forum. The input I have seen from providers and hobbyist past and present is that there are no real life transitions from the transactional relationship to a truly loving relationship. In the end, as much as I care about and feel love for this young lady, it is only a fantasy that she provides me in our encounters. I'll never be able to know what, if any, aspects of the emotion and affection she reciprocated were sincere or performance. She has been in this business for a few years now, I am certain I am not the first to have felt this way about her.
Taking a break from her truly pains me, but it is really the only realistic option for me. I have no desire to see any other providers since meeting her, maybe after a few months or years, I'll find my way back. I am truly grateful to everyone I have met in this experience, and for the wonderful input I have gained from posters on this board, providers and hobbyist a like.
-- Modified on 2/12/2017 6:30:50 AM
Everyone needs to make their own decisions. The ladies will welcome you back if and when you are ready to resume. It's actually a really nice thing about the "hobby" - unlike real life - you can always come back.
might consider returning.
For me, this world is much safer (better) than chasing a RL girl friend or fling on the side. Providers want discretion where a GF wants more and more of your time.
Everyone needs to make their own choices.
I for one understand exactly what you're dealing with right now...I had an extremely limted sexual history before I started lobbying at age 50, and I have found myself emotionally connecting with a provider on more than one occasion...
No doubt that for many, if not most human beings, there is a strong mental and emotional component included in physical intimacy, and only the truly strong or emotionally dead can turn it off completely...in my opinion the emotional issues are a greater risk to hobbyists than the physical risks...and they are harder to prepare for and prevent...
Kudos to you for both recognizing that what you are dealing with is happening and for recognizing that it isn't something that can actually be real...stepping away is a difficult choice, I know...I myself handled a similar situation very badly and hurt someone who had come to mean a great deal to me...I wish I had the insight then that you have now...it was a very hard lesson learned...
My respects, sir...
... from this provider before you went down a path that wasn't right for either of you.
I can relate to your circumstances prior to entering the hobby, and what you've learned from it. I've been very lucky to find a few providers who balance the "connection" part of their job with the p4p aspect very well. That's especially true of my ATF, who makes it clear to her clients that she loves them, as people, and brings that love into her sessions without stepping over The Line. And I love her also, but like a close friend. I know because of our individual circumstances it will never be more than that, and I'm grateful to have that kind of relationship. I had to break off from another provider, a fine woman, recently because she showed signs of wanting a romantic relationship with me.
All the best to you! One bit of advice, if you do decide to return: seek out providers who are in a strong committed relationship. I think that helps them avoid "falling" for a client, and at least in my case it removes any possibility of my falling for the provider as I'd never do anything to break up someone's committed relationship.
...fortunately I truly love my wife and my affection for me has only grown since I have started "dating". Weird right? Maybe not. My endorphin are up and I am feeling happy! For various reasons my wife and I don't have sex very often but one of the best times lately was about a week after my first "date" And that was not because I was fantasizing about the other women, I can't do that, it's too distracting. It's just because I was more into sex as a result of branching out.
I do however have strong feelings for all my providers and I do have to remind myself everyday to not bother them. I will wait a month or more for a repeat visit. For one in particular, the anticipation of seeing her again is really killing me. But I'm going to let that build up so that when I do see her again it will be uncommonly amazing and ravenous.
There are some providers with drama in their life and if you let yourself get attached you could be pulled into that drama and that can be dangerous. I met one recently who had been caught twice and arrested once. She also had a client that fell in love with her and started freaking out. I don't know the details but that's a really bad situation. Someone like her needs help. She needs help setting up a better web site, she needs help with screening, she needs an assistant, and then she could actually start to make some good money and have some great experiences. She's very young. Told me once she had a pimp that was taking 90%. Awful stuff. (you might have guessed that she and I talked more than had sex on that date - which was awesome!)
Even if you were to become your all time favorite's sugar daddy and have her for awhile - she would eventually want to go back to the life - and that would kill you. At least that is what I have heard and read on this site.
Anyway, definitely take a break and get your head straight.
As they all say, this is the place for no drama, everything should be happy and carefree.
ready to get in a warm bath with a straight razor. Many, including me, have been where you are. Its particularly hard in the beginning (first couple of years) to get the proper perspective on the relationship. I think most veterans will agree with me that the best cure is to see random girls for a little while. In other words, you see a girl once or twice, and then try another one. You will notice that same warmth and attention coming from other providers and it will help you understand that, although you may have become friends, it was largely performance art on her part and something all professionals have mastered. We pay for a fantasy, not reality.
Then you will come to the place that I'm in where taking a break from hobbying would be like taking a break from breathing.
In my case, I decided the circumstances were ripe (divorced, kids grown up) to go for it. 12 years later, no regrets.
How ever you end up, here's hoping you like where you are, and remember, the door works both ways.
When she said she loves me more than I love her I decided to prove her wrong.
I haven't booked a Hooker since that day.
Since I still feel manly even though I fell in love, I occasionally look at photos and read reviews to keep my options open, in case she decides she loves me no more and I need a quick fix.
I'd never resort to feeling better with one of her Hot flirty friends ,even if she dumped me.
I might be an ass but I have more class and self esteem to resort to that.
We never know what a Lady has stored in her mind for tomorrow's sunrise.
I can't help but wonder if you told the sparkle in your life how you feel about her.
There are millions and millions of Hot women waiting for a man nearby to say what's on his mind.
Most of them aren't waiting with hope to say NO, they are often hoping someone will call them beautiful instead of Hot.
If you haven't melded your mind with hers and it's all about sex, forget you ever met.
beautiful and hot are the same
Beautiful is a compliment.
Hot can mean I got to fuck you, you turn me on.
The first is respectful, the second makes her sound like nothing more than a fuck and what someone who doesn't understand big words would say !!!
Tell a woman to her face that she was hot.
by being respectful and treating a provider like I would a civvie woman, I get way more than my share of OTC time. I just had one last week that invited me to see her new apartment. She made us a light lunch, then said she wanted to show me her bedroom, so we ended up naked for three hours and three pops, then I took her out to dinner. Because we had sex, I offered her a donation and she handed it back to me, and said I only have to pay her when she's working at her separate incall. She's on vacation now and invited me over as a friend. I'll take the gift of the freebie, thank you.
How often has telling a hot provider she's "hot" gotten you something like that? Compliment them the way you would a civvie girlfriend and she will respond in kind. At least that's my experience after seeing over 400 providers. Telling them they're hot just makes you a john, not a friend. They hear that all day long from guys, so it doesn't make you special.
Could You Enjoy the Rest of Your Life with a Hot Stupid Wife?
Would you enjoy introducing her to your friends and business associates ?
If so, within ten years you'll be able to buy extremely lively synthetic dolls to satisfy your cravings.
She can't be truly beautiful if she's stupid..........
She can be beautiful if her mind and heart is stimulating...IMO
kuddos 
Hot can mean I got to fuck you, you turn me on.
The first is respectful, the second makes her sound like nothing more than a fuck and what someone who doesn't understand big words would say !!!
...have to do with the price of tea in China?
I've had several Asian girlfriends and that doesn't sound to me like something an Asian girl would say. Of course, mine were all hookers. Does that make a difference?
Because my GF is really a 6' 2" Blonde Russian who was a Hooker with TER reviews before
I met her. I don't want to take a chance on her adding up my posts, figuring out my identity.
She still has GF's from TER, and they talk about clients like they're ALL deplorable.
Because I know the OP and the Hooker he fell for is Asian and she's my GF's sister.
Because I was covertly letting the OP know Asian Hookers fall in love too, and leave the business, usually before they are 35.
Because I know you feel contempt toward PYT Asian Gals because a few Hot Asian Hookers refused to answer the door when you knocked.
Because I thought you would be disappointed in me if I mentioned my GF is Jamaican.
Because my GF knows I booked Hookers in the past, she was sitting next to me
giggling when I posted.
Because I was laughing at the scandal that might ensue if I mentioned she is Asian,
after all is said and done, you can't help being you. 
Because I've searched for an Asian GF my entire life, I'm ecstatic I finally succeeded.
Because all my GF's since I turned 21 are Asian.
Because personal details you want to know about someone that isn't part of your life,
shouldn't bother you enough to ask WHY.
Because YOU would need a map and calculator to decipher the number of Asian countries.
Because if you had a life you wouldn't fail to act smart, by asking dumb questions.
has an Asian sister? How does that happen? Or did I miss something?
So she could be BOTH Asian and Russian.
Since he mentioned Asian rather than Chinese, Japanese, Vietnamese, Indian, Indonesian or any other nationality/ethnicity he's clearly talking generic brand so it's the lower priced tea.
Agreed, seems entirely irrelevant and immaterial (What would Perry say?) to the discussion.
I would make one comment as well. Yeah, it's easy to allow the emotional attachment to grow too much and one must maintain a health level of emotional discipline and have a level of emotional maturity to fully enjoy the experiences without ultimately confusing the professional from the real. Most of use have been there.
One reason I suspect you're feeling things as strongly as you are is that you are looking for that real relationship and if so these encounters will not ever really satisfy that need. you don't mention if you're single or in a (bad?/boring?/stale?) relationship. If not perhaps you'll be more comfortable establishing one.
One thing that may well help you in dealing with the pain you're feeling about not seeing this girl again is to stop thinking about your emotions and feeling and dreams about her reciprocating them and think very clearly about how a professional views you. One metaphor I've heard said here more than one is that basically all us Johns are just ATMs. Once you walk out the door the only thing your object of love (lust -- think about that is it love or still lust) wants to hear from you is that you're going to pay for another session. She doesn't want flowers, she doesn't want cute texted, she doesn't want to meet your mother, she doesn't want to be told you miss her. As you work through that mental-emotional analysis you'll probably start getting mad, are yourself or at her or both, and then you'll probably be able to start letting go.
You might even find after it all settles out you can go back an see her, have a great time with the fantasy and Illusion of passion and intimacy and let it go once you walk out the door after the session.
Ah, the "second adolescence". The pleasure of fucking beautiful women you knew you could never get to first base with when you were a horny teenager but now you can pay for the privilege.
I'm on about my fifth or sixth now.
And I decide to take a break from the hobby after every time.
So good luck, as you wish.