I have had a situation arise several times now, which makes me think there is some reason behind it. The one common thread is that all of the ladies seem to have no problem with me. In fact, they seem enthusiastic about meeting again.
After a session, I ask over email if they would be willing to do a P411 OK and a TER whitelist. I get a prompt and enthusiastic yes. I then send the P411 request, and they go ahead and OK me. But nothing happens on the whitelist. If there is an opportunity to re-request the whitelist I do. For example, when we are emailing about the review I give them. I bring up the whitelist again, and they tell me absolutely, and to expect it soon. And then nothing happens. Not wanting to be a pest, I just drop it. This happens consistently - maybe half a dozen times recently.
So now I have a lot more OK's than whitelists. Which seem to be more useful anyway. I am successful in getting a response and passing screening at least 90% of the time. So my question to the ladies is: When you get this request is there some reason you prefer doing a P411 ok vs a whitelist?
File the OKs and WL, under irrelevant and move on.
It's not important.
I was giving the answer that if he has little to no issue booking dates, don't worry about lists.
Worrying about lists during a session is a distraction.
Keep at it; must be a glitch somewhere.
If there is a "glitch" it's on TER's end, but it's the providers, not TER to which he will end up being a pest. Any good will the White list we create will be undone by bugging the ladies constantly for a White List.
One request perhaps followed by a single reminder is all I would advise in the quest for a white list. Or he might ask again during "cuddle time" in a subsequent date. Pestering a lady for a white list doesn't sound like a way to endear oneself to a provider. He could find himself becoming more trouble than he is worth if he does so.
if a gal mentions she'll give you a WL referral, I'd imagine she's gotta like you enough to wanna see you again. A cordial reminder(s) is a better way to phrase pestering her
I asked a close associate why I couldn't see her WhiteList 3 or 4 times and she kept assuring me she had already. We both wanted to get to the bottom of why I couldn't see it.
Silly girl? it was a typo on her part... spelt my name northofboston lol. I've subsequently forgiven her ... about 10 times
All seem to amount to the same thing, with P411/Date-Check/RS2K and these verification sites being considered a bit more "reliable" in the vetting of both guys and gals than TER.
I'd prefer to see TER whitelists evolve into something "more" than an everyday OK, something like a strong personal vouch for a guy - "I've seen him many times and he is one of the best". In reality, the value of TER whitelists are often seen as "less" than that of the verification site OK's, as the process used to WL is highly individual and unique to each provider. There are cases of WL's appearing for a guy who never met that provider, etc... Too many variables and issues plague WL's.
Has one of my dates requested for me to 'Whitelist' him.
After a rendezvous, if I know I want to be with the gentleman again, AND I sincerely feel that my fellow providers would feel safe and comfortable enjoying a rendezvous with him...I immediately 'Whitelist' him. It's called being courteous, and my way of thanking my date for a fun and memorable rendezvous.
Robbin - When I first started, I had a lady do the very same thing. I still see her to this day when I can. So this kind of courtesy and thoughtfulness does not go un-noticed. Well done.
-- Modified on 1/17/2017 9:01:44 AM
I to appreciate a lady or the ladies that have Whitelisted me. A couple have done this voluntarily and I have had to ask a few. But the courtesy goes a long way in my book.
OK me without an issue, but when it comes to WL it's a different story. One did it without asking, a couple had to be politely asked once, and a couple I politely reminded once and then I dropped it. All stated they would be happy to provide it. And I have repeated with all of them, so I believe they think I'm safe.
Robbin, I certainly like your style. After nearly six years, over 150 ladies, over 550 dates, and 101 D-C verifications, I got my first "white list" last month.
for why they don't WL you.
That being said, when you send a request for an okay on P411, we must respond. You get an Okay even if we don't want to see you again (for whatever reason). Falling short of dangerous behavior, you'll get that Okay unless we can explain to P411 why we will not give it. At one point, I had to give an Okay to someone who shorted me, even after explaining the situation. He was later banned from the site.
Whereas TER's WL is on us whether we will give it. My practice is to give it without having to be asked. I normally wait a few visits first though.
Some ladies don't want to share and some don't utilize WLs. It could be for many reasons, good and bad. Maybe some really did forget to do that, perhaps they don't know how to do one....
It doesn't matter much to me if you have a WL or an Okay, I will call/contact the references and hear what they have to say. Too much gets unsaid in an Okay or WL.
P411 keeps providers safe (please, a sweeping generalization but overall the arc of P411).
TER allows abuse on the boards and allows fake reviews to stand, even possibly encourages them through the rewarding of free VIP).
P411 pulls accounts of clients who are abusive. TER doesn't get involved.
Hence a lot of providers prefer to work with P411 when it comes to safety concerns (i.e. for screening).
I am a provider who does not give WLs for the very important reason that I don't accept them.
Hope this clears up some things.
At least the first half of the statement. The good thing about P411 is it's about equally for providers and clients. In fact, given that providers have an obligation to provide OKs under almost all circumstances, it's more oriented to clients.
Guys are the ones who pay for membership... provider accounts are free. While providers have the option to pay additional fees for visiting ads or preferred placement, that's not required.
As Alexandra said, a provider almost always MUST give an OK when requested, even if she does not wish to do so. It seems like, if a guy has numerous complaints against him, and they are of a serious nature - only then, will action be taken. However, by that point, his OK's have enabled him to see quite a few ladies.
Why in all that is holy would you ever associate yourself with an organization that in your opinion cares so little about women?
they are no substitute for a P411 OK or an actual reference. I'll bet if you did a poll of the women here, far more than half would say they don't use WLs to screen.
I've never had a provider claim she'll only take p411 oks. Many times a provider will tell me a GF of hers gave me a WL and were good to go. I have no idea if they've ever asked the GF about me.
But as someone who I know has been around this board a long time, I'm sure you've read many posts by women who say they would NEVER rely simply on P411 let alone WLs. I'd say this is an example of "the exception proves the rule."
-- Modified on 1/17/2017 5:45:54 PM
Along with the same half dozen mongers who say they have a white list from an escort they've never seen. There's 32k users on TER right now. The people who chime in knocking the WL are a very small percentage. I'm surprised you haven't PMd GaGa so he could add his usual know on the WL.
-- Modified on 1/17/2017 5:45:54 PM
Apparently from your own experience, which is an even smaller sample than a so-called "half dozen escorts." And how do you "know" it's a half dozen? The bullshit's getting very thick here.
We are REQUIRED to give the p411 OK, or else someone from p411 will send us a nice email "reminding" us to take care of it. And, even if we don't feel comfortable giving the OK, we're generally required to comply. There is no similar requirement to give a TER whitelist (unless, you count the implied threat of a bad review).
Whitelistings are a bit different than OK's, in one sense - that a REVIEWER is asking us for a favor, ON A REVIEW SITE. The implications are pretty clear. Gimme the whiltelist, or you're getting a 3-3 and negative backchannel! (The opposite is also true: kiss my ass, and get a good review, and lots of shills on the board). Whether or not that's the guy's intention, I always feel that the implication exists.
Personally, I give both whitelists and p411 OK's, unless a guy is dangerous. There definitely more downsides in refusing than upsides. The last two TER whitelists I gave were to men I would not see again (due more to boundary/behavior issues than that they were a threat of any kind).
If there's an implied quid pro quo, then why don't ladies give out more whitelist approvals? I've never received one, though I have several P411 okays.
If the standards for P411 okays are so low, and they're given out so perfunctorily, why do ladies place more trust in them? (I suppose that could do with a higher class of provider being on P411, but I don't know how true that is.)
Have you ever asked a provider for a whitelist referral? If not, that's probably why you've never received one. Most guys ask. I've been asked several times - I've never given one out without being asked.
I take both Whitelists and p411 OK's with a grain of salt. I always double-check p411 OK's to see if the referring provider has any more info to share, and would do the same for a Whitelist referral.
Personally, I trust p411 OK's a *wee* bit more. TER whitelists have an extra layer of pressure, in that there's the immediate threat of a review hanging over the provider's head (not all p411 guys are active here).
One additional thing is that p411 does require that a date actually take place in order for a provider to give an OK (although, that's not foolproof). There have been several instances in which hobbyists have received Whitelist referrals from mystery providers they've never even heard of. Some of those guys posted in this thread.
...surprised and grateful when I receive them. The provider's courtesy results in many return visits whenever possible.
Great that your providers want to do something special for you, spontaneously 
I haven't done so except when requested, because it honestly doesn't usually occur to me.
I've been asked quite a bit... Pretty much every guy I've seen who's active here has asked me, in fact.
I've gotten one such WL and there's no control here to stop someone from doing it. I know of other members this has happened to. Why would someone do it? I don't know for sure but perhaps to have their stage name connected to a well known reviewer or poster. I contacted the woman who WL'd me and never got a reply so I think I just dropped it.
At P411 this can't happen because a client must request the listing first. If a provider can credibly prove she never saw the person, he's likely to be delisted.
If I get an email reminding me to "okay" someone and I tell Gina why I don't want to okay that person (if I won't okay them, meaning they are one of the few gentlemen that I've met who I wouldn't see again), that's the end of it.
All you have to do is say "No, I wouldn't see him again." End of story.
Who cares about the back channel here? People who threaten, coerce or practice other unsavory behaviors aren't my target clientele. Period.
I don't give TER whitelists because I don't accept them (alone) for screening. If a guy has plenty of reviews and WLs, that's great. I'm still contacting references.
from other women (I have never personally had to refuse to give an OK to a p411 member)...
if you refuse to give the OK, even with a fairly good reason (see Alexandra's post above), Gina will basically force you to give the OK, or quit the site. I've seen this same thing discussed multiple times on other forums, so hers is not an isolated occurrence.
I don't think the unsavory blackmail-for-reviews (or the more subtle favors-for-reviews) crowd is the target crowd of ANY escort with pride and integrity. But, that doesn't exactly prevent them from seeing us. Since they're well-connected, they do tend to have references, and know how to behave pre-date. Luckily, I've managed to avoid MOST of that crowd. However, see my post above. He was a lesson learned. He had references, and in fact, was extremely polite up to a few hours before the date started. I don't think anybody is fully immune to that sh** unless they eschew reviews altogether (a course that is becoming increasingly common).
...than TER is in the ability to whitelist someone. As was said, when a provider receives a request from P411 to OK someone, perhaps it's easy to do it. On TER, providers have to actively search for the place on TER to whitelist someone. In my experience, several providers who wanted to whitelist me asked me how to do it. Since I'm not a provider, I didn't know, but I tried to help them figure it out.
Maybe a provider could weigh in and say which site lends itself better to OKing someone.
it must not be to easy to do. Once she had the instructions, she provided the WL immediately.
as long as the provider verifies your authenticity. I ask my WLs to feel free to refer me should there be an inquiry before I alert her.
The less work for me the better.
However if I was a provider, I'd never just go by the WL without at least a courteous inquiry into my (any guys) legitimacy
I have had several hot ladies do the white list for me and I appreciate it. However, when I ask them to update it, they always seem to forget and then they contact me to tell me that they want to see me again and once the session is over and I ask them to update the list and it never happens. I just don't know what is going on because this is happening with all of them. You would think that they wouldn't want to see me again if they didn't want to update the white list but they keep coming back for more dates.
...unaware of. I have had a few say they will but don't. Then hear from them they can't figure it out. It's been discussed here on the boards and a provider explained how. Good luck finding that thread.
Providers have a White List (aka Referrals). It's the list of clients they have White Listed. They have to go there and delete the first WL they gave and then go WL you through the normal process.
I think it's just easier to give an ok on p411 and that's why u have the quick and easy response that way. It takes more effort on the lady's part to white list.