Hello everyone,  
 
  How many providers out there have married their clients and vise versa?  What's the percentage of good and bad outcomes?  Please let me know.  


-- Modified on 10/28/2016 10:22:32 AM

It seems like the right thing to do at the time

Also they have good chemistry.

Good Morning,  

.... If you like it, then you should put a ring on it.  

Zoe Piers

in a heartbeat.  Chemistry is everything.

For hobbyists I think it's because it's more fun to watch a hot, sexy woman do your laundry than a fat, frumpy one. There may be other reasons, but I think this is the main one.

all other levels, who could understand  a provider better than a hobbyist?  Who could understand a hobbyist better than a provider?

All other factors being equal...............

Sorry for the rant. My advice to all is don't marry in the business.

Sorry everyone for the rantful original question.  Obviously there are those that marry clients and providers and get tangled in a big web.  It's great when we all fall in love as long as that love isn't living a lie.   It's better to be up front and honest and not steal the benefits of living like a rock star from the other honest person.  It's best to stay where we all are in the foundations that we all build and work it out and forgive in order to have a castle in the end.  Thanks for the input on a tough reality question.  

                       Luv Queeny

honesty regarding your past is crucial to establishing real intimacy.  From a hobbies perspective,how many civie women would be accepting of a hobbiest's past "hobby"?  And how hard is it to find a civie woman who fucks like a provider?  I've thought about that question quite a bit and those are the two questions that keep coming up in my mind.  Marriage isn't a necessity but when looking for a real relationship, those two "obstacles" are ever present.  And how many "civie" guys would be willing to accept a provider's past?  Just food for thought. I don't know all the answers to those questions but I recently had that discussion with my ATF who lived with me for awhile.  She indicated that she turned down civilian guys who approached her in public largely for that very reason.

Why commit to a relationship that you know is not going to be monogamous?

You're a human being and nobody can fault you for that. I KNOW you're a strong woman. But, even the strongest women have weaknesses. I am no exception! Lean on your friends and family. No mattah what you're still a rock stah!

I find I get along better with clients than civilians.

That damn Marriage contract ruins things.

I hear he's a treasure trove of bad advice ...

NoB wishes you only the best, doll. xo

And orgasms with them while hes at the office working is beyond comprehesion.

Actually it could be the guy has a fetish where he likes knowing his wife is having thousands of guys suck on her pussy and she has them erupt their semen in her mouth.  To each to his own i guess then...

...them then to be unpleasantly surprised with something that you didn't expect later.  

Let me put it to you this way: there are those of us who believe that kiss indeed could be just a kiss and fuck more often then not indeed is no more then a fuck but a phone call to your former big time flame could be the grounds for divorce.  

The fact that you know the "naughty" truth about each other, and are ok with the other's weaknesses and feel comfortable with one another not 'because' but 'despite' could prove to be the greatest glue that keeps you together and may even alleviate some of the sexual insecurity that men and women feel about each other when they know that both are trying to put their best foot forward, i.e. neither is real. There are no guarantees in romantic attachments. That's just the way it is.  

But I think how you met and how you grew to think in intimate terms of one another, despite of how society tells you that you should have viewed each other, actually may prove to be something extra which will help you to withstand a crisis or two which all couples eventually end up going through. The most important thing is the ability to forgive momentary weakness and distinguish between an emotional outburst (often referred to as "temporary insanity" - for example him telling you something bad or calling you something really bad in the heat of an argument) and something which points to his core. If you can handle that then I'm sure knowledge that you're an escort and he's your former (or maybe even a present) client would only strengthen your relationship, because that fact by itself would be the proof that both of you already overcame a certain barrier.  
You may even want to consider replaying your past relationship once in a blue moon where, even as your special man, he'd have to pay you in order to get whatever it is that he would be looking for. Sort of like "chasing a boogie man with a mask of a devil" thing.
Also make no mistake the fact that he'd be marrying you wouldn't mean that his sexual fantasies and habits would go away. If you want your relationship to have a chance you'd definitely should be prepared to cater to them somehow. Remember that in the old Japan a lady of the house would pick (or at least approve) a geisha for her SO.  

The most important thing is not to listen to other providers who already had such relationships and it didn't work. Chances are they also had relationships with men other then their clients and it didn't worked too. Every romantic venture is a risk. Period. But if you don't risk it you don't win. That's just the way it is in life... ...period!

Find similar situations that actually worked. They are out there. Maybe not on TER but ask around on blogs I'm sure you'd come across some. Talk to the lady-part of such bargain. Maybe even talk to a guy then too and have him explain how he feels about his wife. In order to be successful in something you have to listen to the success stories and most important of all ignore skeptics because, if there is a possibility of a good thing happening God knows there'd be plenty.  

One more thing I would suggest though. Don't tie the knot until you live with this man for a bit and then after living with him for a bit go on vacation together.  

And come up with a list of what you expect to do and expect him not to do. Like what if he's away and calls himself an escort, would it be a problem for you? What if at some point you decide to go back to work because "deep inside you're still such a slut" lol? Would it be a problem for him even if you keep it very discrete? Those hypotheticals are nice to work out at least in theory before going any farther.

...was a touring drummer-met an amazing woman in Lisbon-continued to see her-became real friends/and lovers-had no idea at the time she was provider-found out-didn't really matter too much,cause we were both doing the same thing,except she was getting paid-would share what we learned,which made our time together more exciting-she passed 2 years ago-still looking for a woman that compares....any ideas

Over the past dozen years, I've met around dozen or so providers with who I have developed long standing relationships, some of which pushed the limits of the client/provider relationship beyond the boundaries most of us consider typical.   Would I ever consider taking it to the next step and moving into the realm where a LTR or even marriage was possible?  Yes, maybe...  

I know of one provider who married a client, and as far as I know, she retired, they are happily married, and now have two children.  Good for them!    

There have been twists and turns in this game that could never have been anticipated, but I am not a conventional hobbyist, as you know.  I play the game as I see fit, and adapt to conditions as they occur.   Whether it's a meeting in my NYC home area or on the road with old friends, or first time experiences,  all has been cool for the most part.  My approach has served me well, but my journey is...mine.  It has been a fun ride, and I can't wait for the net chapter!  The beat goes on!  That includes you, babe!  ;

I've known several such arrangements over the years. In each case the lady was looking for some type of security. One lady was specifically looking for health care coverage (I was her first choice, but politely said no. I'm like you. Regular marriage is hard enough, but I feel hobby marriage is even more difficult. There are too many skeletons in each other's closet. Actually, there are too many closets). What's interesting is that in the majority of the hobby marriages, both parties kept seeing other people. The ladies kept working, and the guys kept hobbying. So far, just like regular marriage, the hobby marriages have worked out about 50% of the time. So even though I wouldn't do it, I can see both points of view.

So they can be as happy as the rest of us, of course lol

They probably like each other.