Funny you brought that up. Just today I saw the site of a provider who offers 90 minutes to new clients for her usual 1hr rate which I don't think I've seen before. Her two hour rate is 1.5X her one hour which seems like a good deal. Anyways, just thought it was funny that came up the same day I noticed those two things.
"she really doesn't like one hour appointments for the first visit; she prefers appointments for an hour and a half for the first meeting so you can get to know each other."
Now I'm all for getting to know each other but at this price point, that's an extra $250 to talk (I didn't say 'we'll I'm only paying for an hour but if she wants to throw in an extra 30 min to talk I'm good with that... but I thought of it) I just thanked the asst. and moved on.
Then she wrote back and said the provider would do a HALF hour with me if it was about the money. I responded, (thinking 'huh'?) saying thanks but it's not about the money I was no longer interested (I tried to keep it cordial and did not say that I felt like I was being upsold and manipulated all over the lot, but that's how it felt, and that ends it for me regardless of how great the provider seems).
I've had many one hour meetings and we got to know each other really well during that time. Plus, given that I'm reaching the prime of middle age lol, I'm not gonna pop twice in 90 minutes.
So, after being offered the half hour, was I a jerk not to counter with the original hour I wanted? What would you have done
Ususaly get to know where her gag reflex is in the first three minutes. I figure I know her well when she either spits or swallows. By that time I've decided to repeat or not.
Your beef, (and you have a legitimate beef) is with the booker, not the provider. This booker is doing her boss a great disservice, first by trying to strong arm you into a longer appointment than what you requested and secondly by leaving money on the table by offering you a 30 minute appointment when you were clearly willing and wanting to book an hour.
Personally, If I were seriously interested in seeing the girl in question I would have simply responded to the booker during your first exchange and restated my interest in seeing her for an hour.
No, you were not a jerk, but you might have missed out of the chance to see a great provider by getting into a pissing contest with the booker. Obviously the booker was the one being a jerk. and both you and the provider in question should have a beef with her.
BTW, I never do 90 minute appointments, like you I feel an hour is plenty long enough for me as I am pretty much a "one and done" guy.
Yes, the girl seemed great; it was probably a missed opportunity for us both. I just got pissed off and said I'd go blue balls before seeing her - but you're right, it's because of the booker. I bet if I told the girl let's do an hour, she'd have smiled and taken it gladly.
...a thirty minute rate when you were willing to pay for an hour. It makes no sense.
The problem is how to let the provider know her assistant is costing her business, since the booker is answering her email. I would post an open message on the provider's regional board, letting her know that the booker cost her an appointment
I was wondering that myself as the booker is the gatekeeper. Posting locally is a good idea! thanks!!
I realize there might be more to this conversation than written here but if you feel this "not good" during the initial conversation, its usually a smart idea to skip the BS negotiations and move on. For most folks, there's usually no good way for this story to end otherwise.
unless she's an agency girl, I doubt the assistant is doing anything that the provider is not aware of.
Plenty of fish in the sea.
FWIW, I like the 90 minute get-to-know-you appointment as long as its not 1.5x the 60 minute rate. Any provider who is worth her salt can make me happy twice in that time. A truly motivated girl will go for three. That's what I call getting to know someone. LOL
Now I'm all for getting to know each other but at this price point, that's an extra $250 to talk (I didn't say 'we'll I'm only paying for an hour but if she wants to throw in an extra 30 min to talk I'm good with that... but I thought of it) I just thanked the asst. and moved on.
Then she wrote back and said the provider would do a HALF hour with me if it was about the money. I responded, (thinking 'huh'?) saying thanks but it's not about the money I was no longer interested (I tried to keep it cordial and did not say that I felt like I was being upsold and manipulated all over the lot, but that's how it felt, and that ends it for me regardless of how great the provider seems).
I've had many one hour meetings and we got to know each other really well during that time. Plus, given that I'm reaching the prime of middle age lol, I'm not gonna pop twice in 90 minutes.
So, after being offered the half hour, was I a jerk not to counter with the original hour I wanted? What would you have done?
... I've made a few exceptions and scheduled 90 minute first dates. Once was because the provider was clear on her web site that she prefers that length for a first date. And she offers a very reasonable rate for 90 mins (much less than 1.5 X her hour rate) so it was easy to agree to her preference. And I'm glad I did. We talked for about 20 minutes at the start and I think we had a more enjoyable time because of it. Also she's a delightful person, smart as a tack with many interests, so our chat was enjoyable in itself.
If I were in your situation and had declined the 90 mins but was offered 30, I would have countered with 60 as I never do 30 minute sessions with providers. I don't think you're a jerk for not countering, as you're free to schedule sessions of whatever length you like (if the provider is ok with it).
-- Modified on 10/16/2016 1:11:49 PM
Funny you brought that up. Just today I saw the site of a provider who offers 90 minutes to new clients for her usual 1hr rate which I don't think I've seen before. Her two hour rate is 1.5X her one hour which seems like a good deal.
Anyways, just thought it was funny that came up the same day I noticed those two things.
The lady in question has decided that a longer appointment is the most fruitful, probably not just in terms of the extra $250. "Getting to know each other" doesn't necessarily mean a half hour of "talk."
One reason I like longer appointments is that I like learning how she moves and how she flirts. It makes for a nice combination of anticipation. The moments of small talk and just being with a woman I know I'll soon be naked in bed with is something I find very pleasurable.
If the talk is about my having to tell my life story before she feels comfortable, that's not too much fun, but very very few escorts really want to go that route. Mostly it's just sort of looking each other over before getting closer.
But, if that's not your thing, you were right to move on. Her time will be booked and you'll find somebody you click with. That's part of the deal--you don't have to fall in love with every single lady you encounter.
Very well explained! 👌🏼
One reason I like longer appointments is that I like learning how she moves and how she flirts. It makes for a nice combination of anticipation. The moments of small talk and just being with a woman I know I'll soon be naked in bed with is something I find very pleasurable.
If the talk is about my having to tell my life story before she feels comfortable, that's not too much fun, but very very few escorts really want to go that route. Mostly it's just sort of looking each other over before getting closer.
But, if that's not your thing, you were right to move on. Her time will be booked and you'll find somebody you click with. That's part of the deal--you don't have to fall in love with every single lady you encounter.
Than an hour for the first session with a new girl. Nothing is more excruciating than being stuck for 90 minutes or more with a girl you have zero connection with. It's probably much the same for the provider, but since they're getting paid, they manage to power through it.
For me, any kind of upsell attempt is a mood killer. I would have done the exact same thing, never looking back.
til a provider suggested that we didn't need that long & she would fnish what we started irrespective of time. I think as a nervious newbie I needed the 90 minutes... but once i was past that, it wasn't needed.
I think you should have countered with the original hour you wanted, since clearly there was a miscommunication between you, the booker & the provider.
But you weren't wrong if you felt the dialog had spoiled it for you.
Unless of course a minimum was clearly stated on her website, then it would clearly be on me for not reading.
Your scenario smells exactly like an upsell.
Have I ever scheduled 1 hour and regretted not scheduling longer? Yes, but I've also regretted scheduling longer appointments as well.
if we don't click then I'm not stuck. after, that I go for 2 hour minimum
Who cares? So you feel taken advantage of for ten seconds. Just move on.
It's so easy to it and stew, but even easier to take ten seconds and say "No thanks, appreciate your time. Good luck."
Then move on to someone else, and never have to worry about it again.
xoxo
C
According to the OP, he said "no thanks" and moved on only to have the booker contact HIM with an offer, and a veiled insult that a thirty minute appointment was on the table.
From the sounds of it, both the OP and the actual provider herself have a legitimate gripe against the booker. If ninety minutes was the providers minimum booking for first time clients, that's one thing, but the booker PROVED otherwise by contacting the OP with an offer for a 30 minute appointment. This is on her, not the provider, not the OP, but squarely on the booker. She blew it and most likely cost her employer a client.
But even still, if just one booker reads this an avoids making the same stupid mistake, then it will all have been worth it
Stewing and being annoyed is ok for a little while, but after a while fuck it - who cares. lol. Not saying he shouldn't post about it to vent or correct, but a shady person is going to be a shady person. An honest booker is going to be honest by default, and this stuff is just common sense. You can't really be trained in honesty, just avoid people who are shady.
Avoid avoid avoid shady people. All of us know by now you can't change people. When you try, you get sucked in to there nonsense.
I just wanted to test my pov against what others might think, as this is a fuck board, it wasn't an off the wall question, and there are some pretty darn good people here to get advice from.
I got some darn good advice and moved on. Not sure how this equates to stewing and obsessing, but if that's what it sounded like to you then that's your prerogative and thanks for writing 
-- Modified on 10/16/2016 9:12:25 PM
Personally I feel an hour is rushed. But since I have to cough up the dough and unlike some here who claimed to have spent millions of dollars so far in the hobby, I have to budget. So an hour it is
first and foremost, follow your pocket. If you only want to invest in 60 min., cordially explain that to the booker. This is a bi-directional business venture ...
I'm seeing a gal that requires a 2 hour first date. That's WAY more than I can invest right now even tho she's the best of the best. I didn't know that but she offered 90 min. because we met at a M&G.
So we each need to do whatever it takes to accomplish our desires ... mine was to meet this remarkable lady, even if it were only that one time. It's rare that I'm a one and done kinda guy. We'll see
btw ... I'm usually a one and done guy ... but I'm certainly willing to allow my friend to try. And that makes a great date greater.
-- Modified on 10/16/2016 10:50:47 PM