I thought I had it made when my wife allowed me to hobby for a number of years while we remained sexless, however she eventually decided to cash in her chips and divorce me, sending me into a financial tailspin that has to this day impinged on my ability to hobby.l
But, it was still worth it
When you have to literary start begging your spouse/significant other for sex?And how do you deal with it?
it's like man's best friend begging for crumbs
And have been having a great time ever since.
I have no interest in having sex with someone who has no interest in having se with me. A short same old routine done and run that feel like pity fuck. I have aways relied on friends with benefits and provider (who admittedly would not be having sex with me were it not for money, but it doesn't feel like that.) I love my wife and am glad I have a good outlet. which allows me to stay married without staying angry all them.
and this has happened once and not too log ago is that you and your friend with benefits fall in love and the marriage risks to end with ll they sometime terrible effects on the large number of kids, grandkids, the wife who yu still love na who has become your best friend etc. I have been through that one 30 years ago and the fall out to people you love is really not what you would wish.
I broke it off with that beautiful lady with whom I was madly in love and I still, two or three years later miss her. terribly.
I thought I had it made when my wife allowed me to hobby for a number of years while we remained sexless, however she eventually decided to cash in her chips and divorce me, sending me into a financial tailspin that has to this day impinged on my ability to hobby.l
But, it was still worth it
Thanks, Triumph the insult comic dog (and Conan).
There's someone else or he's hitting the porn hard. Neither is a crime (IMO), unless it starts affecting your sex life. Porn is the scarier 'other woman', in a lot of ways. If faced with repeated sexual rejection or a need for increasing deviance in order to 'keep up' with the sea of images in his brain, I'd walk.
"Lady Chatterley's Lover," perhaps.
This weekend, I had a 95 yo woman tell me to read the Bible for racy scenes. I hope she wasn't hinting that she'd like some action! (The Song of Solomon is pretty good, but I like the song of hobbying better.)
If you open the OP, look for the "Edit Message" button below your post.
Without overanalyzing this, my wife and I decided early on not to have children. There was always a lot of love and respect and that continues to this day. Sometime in our thirties however, the sex just slowed to a trickle. No fingerpointing at all but it seemed that work, friends, events, and other activities took on a higher importance in my partner's mind. I'm happy to have found and enjoyed the time and company of some wonderful providers since that stretch. In some ways, finding the hobby may have played a small part in saving my marriage.
If you were having good sex but it stopped, and neither of you had a radical change in looks or health, there's something else going on. You may really have to look hard to find it.
You do truly have wonderful relationships that are sexless...I truly believe that having companionship can assist in fortifying those kind of situations. Discreet and personal with no threat to the status quo of your real life. You never know...with that new revived swag that feeling intimate can bring, maybe the sparkle will attract that wife/significant other too!
I was discussing this with a provider once, at the end of a session, and explained that there was just nothing happening at home, and she said, "When will women get it? If you're not fucking your husband, someone else is."
Yep. Other providers have called BS on this statement but: I took a vow of fidelity, not a vow of chastity. So, I guess I broke one, because I never signed up for the other.
All that does is put pressure on your spouse/SO to do something they don't want to do, at least not at that time. And it frustrates and causes resentment in the one doing the begging.
Instead, get to the root of the problem. Easier said than done! But if your spouse/SO won't work it out with you and won't see a counselor with you, go talk to a counselor yourself. They can help you find the best way to approach your spouse/SO. As was said, the reason(s) for no interest in sex might be hard to determine. And maybe the problem will take a long time to resolve... if it can be resolved. Then you have to decide if the relationship is worth saving, and if so what to do about the prospect of living without sex/intimacy.
Wow. Your post really hit home with me as I'm in a similar position. Got a great relationship with my wife except for the sex part. She admits that it is all her fault. We had many conversations about it. I even asked her if she wanted to see other guys, but she has lost interest in sex altogether. I bring up the topic of our very infrequent sex life and it usually changes her for about two weeks and then it goes back to very infrequent sex.
Been seeing providers on and off for the past 20 years. I hobby behind her back in order not to hurt her. The crazy thing is that I have civilians that are interested in me, but I can't act on it because this would most likely lead to an attachment situation which I'm trying to avoid