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FatVern 400 reads
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It beets posting inane BS on the boards all day.

Posted By: WickedBrut
I don't like the word "retired," but I don't have to earn a living anymore. Sometimes I get real inspired about something and can't get it out of my mind for weeks, months, until I get it done or get enough done to drop it.  
   
 Otherwise, if I get sleepy I take a nap, I eat when I feel hungry, stay up all night if I feel like it, go off when I want, and then there's this thing about sex. I've never really been satisfied with masterbating so that's where the hobby works for me.  
   
 But sometimes the whole hobby process seems too complex. I have to research and pick out who I want to share this special time with. Then when I find her, decide on a day and time. A couple hours later that afternoon doesn't always work out. So maybe two days later early evening, say 7:00. Okay, I can deal with the anticipation, and make sure I don't have anything else going on at that time. Got to make sure I have fresh clothes ready. Hope I don't catch a cold or anything. Plan on being home to clean up and dress a couple of hours before I have to head over...it's all so much scheduling and planning that sometimes I feel the effort is a bit much.  
   
 And then, what if I'm not particularly in the mood come 7:00 a couple evenings from now? What if I feel like doing something else by then? I know I have to be sober, and I have to plan on what I eat so I don't have gas and that I can shit before I shower and wash my ass prior to the session. It's all so much to think about. Go to the bank and maybe pick up some wine, maybe a gift.  
   
 Does anyone else ever find the whole thing just overly complex?  
   
 I usually dress nicely, and I shower well before leaving the house, but I don't usually have to be on schedule. So I'm not a slob or drunk or anything like that.  
   
 And then, you have to arrive not just on time, but you can't get there a half hour early and have a beverage while you wait either. Well, sometimes there's a Starbucks or something up the street from the hotel. But...actually very involved.  
   
 Does anybody else find this stressful? I know it's different for the providers than for the clients, but even so. You ladies go through this kind of thing?  
 

-- Modified on 7/14/2016 11:18:05 PM

I don't like the word "retired," but I don't have to earn a living anymore. Sometimes I get real inspired about something and can't get it out of my mind for weeks, months, until I get it done or get enough done to drop it.

Otherwise, if I get sleepy I take a nap, I eat when I feel hungry, stay up all night if I feel like it, go off when I want, and then there's this thing about sex. I've never really been satisfied with masterbating so that's where the hobby works for me.

But sometimes the whole hobby process seems too complex. I have to research and pick out who I want to share this special time with. Then when I find her, decide on a day and time. A couple hours later that afternoon doesn't always work out. So maybe two days later early evening, say 7:00. Okay, I can deal with the anticipation, and make sure I don't have anything else going on at that time. Got to make sure I have fresh clothes ready. Hope I don't catch a cold or anything. Plan on being home to clean up and dress a couple of hours before I have to head over...it's all so much scheduling and planning that sometimes I feel the effort is a bit much.

And then, what if I'm not particularly in the mood come 7:00 a couple evenings from now? What if I feel like doing something else by then? I know I have to be sober, and I have to plan on what I eat so I don't have gas and that I can shit before I shower and wash my ass prior to the session. It's all so much to think about. Go to the bank and maybe pick up some wine, maybe a gift.

Does anyone else ever find the whole thing just overly complex?

I usually dress nicely, and I shower well before leaving the house, but I don't usually have to be on schedule. So I'm not a slob or drunk or anything like that.

And then, you have to arrive not just on time, but you can't get there a half hour early and have a beverage while you wait either. Well, sometimes there's a Starbucks or something up the street from the hotel. But...actually very involved.

Does anybody else find this stressful? I know it's different for the providers than for the clients, but even so. You ladies go through this kind of thing?


-- Modified on 7/14/2016 11:18:05 PM

It's from work only.   Certainly not the hobby, and my resources will allow me to play indefinitely...  

As for the game being too complex...only you can decide.

Yes, at times the whole process can be overly complex.  Probably why I prefer to see the same small circle of ladies on a repeated basis.  Some prefer to constantly seek out someone, that's never really been my interest.  I'm lucky that I'm comfortable enough with each of them to let them constantly switch things and explore

best bet is to find a handful of ladies you click with, and just rotate amongst them

similar style to me.  80% of my hobby hours are with regulars, which is a little more relaxed than seeing someone new.  However, I'm not retired, so I also have to work my hobby hours each week around my work schedule, so add that to the stress the OP describes and you have my world.  

-- Modified on 7/15/2016 1:28:55 PM

....No it is not overly complex. Thanks to TER it is easy. I find the research part fun. I always book a few days in advance and as for not being in the mood when the time arrives - no way! The only pain is that I have to take a train into Manhattan instead of already being there and fucking on an extended lunch break. But even that isn't so bad because while I am there I do other things afterwards. Not only that, I have more money in retirement than when I was working. Life just got a huge upgrade.

-- Modified on 7/15/2016 7:07:43 AM

GaGambler437 reads

I get laid a lot more days than days I don't and I never schedule in advance.

It's only complex if you make it that way. Finding someone in the morning to see in the afternoon is hardly as difficult as most women and many guys here try to make it seem.

do you shower and shave in between? And I don't mean with both of them at the same time. I also agree with the ease of getting laid the same day... just not as often as you profess.  

BTW, do you agency or fly Indy only?

GaGambler440 reads

When seeing a second (or third or fourth) woman in the same day, I of course do shower again, but it's rare that I will also shave again. I will sometimes when on vacation have morning sex, shower, shave, do morning and afternoon stuff and then shower and shave again in the evening before going out again.

I see both Indy and agencies girls alike. I prefer Indies, but there are a couple of great Asian agencies in town, and since I usually book same day, they are a great fallback if I can't line up an Indy on short notice.

I really don't see what is so unusual about wanting to get laid everyday. I can understand my "appetite" back in my forties might have seemed a bit excessive, back when seeing 3, 4, or even five different women in a single day was not an uncommon occurrence for me, but getting laid only once a day hardly seems excessive to me. When I am in a relationship I have sex every day, sometimes more, why shouldn't I have the same desire when not in a relationship?

and a gal a day is about all i can handle!

(thanks to groucho for that one!)

It's the other stuff. But count our blessings.

The other day I met a woman downtown and took a cab to the hotel because Joe Bidden was arriving that afternoon and traffic was predicted to be heavy. I'm glad I did because dealing with driving home would have seriously taken the edge off the afterglow.

That's the kind of stress that bothers me. But if I was living a busier lifestyle, who knows? I probably could have driven and taken it all in stride

never am i not in the mood to go to a date i've made.  quite the opposite.  i tingle in anticipation all week long.  am currently getting ready for an afternoon date w/a new lady who i made this appt with a week ago...very excited!!

tasarick355 reads

I call bullshit.  A provider a day:  $350 x 7 x 52 = $127,400/year

I've only topped six figures two years, but close on most of the rest.  I know a lot of guys in LA that spend this much.

GaGambler396 reads

but I guarantee you there were a few years where I averaged OVER one hooker everyday, I can't tell you the exact numbers, but I know there were only a couple of dozen days when I was too busy or just didn't care to get laid, but there were several dozen days where I saw two, three or even more women in a single day.  

Oh to be in my forties again. lol

As for how much I spent? Who knows or even cares? I would have blown the money on something much less fun if I wasn't out fucking hookers.

JakeFromStateFarm452 reads

"I spent half my money on gambling, alcohol and wild women. The other half I wasted.”

it was a joke.

pro tip:  if the word "groucho" is included, you can pretty much assume it's a joke.

FatVern401 reads

It beets posting inane BS on the boards all day.

Posted By: WickedBrut
I don't like the word "retired," but I don't have to earn a living anymore. Sometimes I get real inspired about something and can't get it out of my mind for weeks, months, until I get it done or get enough done to drop it.  
   
 Otherwise, if I get sleepy I take a nap, I eat when I feel hungry, stay up all night if I feel like it, go off when I want, and then there's this thing about sex. I've never really been satisfied with masterbating so that's where the hobby works for me.  
   
 But sometimes the whole hobby process seems too complex. I have to research and pick out who I want to share this special time with. Then when I find her, decide on a day and time. A couple hours later that afternoon doesn't always work out. So maybe two days later early evening, say 7:00. Okay, I can deal with the anticipation, and make sure I don't have anything else going on at that time. Got to make sure I have fresh clothes ready. Hope I don't catch a cold or anything. Plan on being home to clean up and dress a couple of hours before I have to head over...it's all so much scheduling and planning that sometimes I feel the effort is a bit much.  
   
 And then, what if I'm not particularly in the mood come 7:00 a couple evenings from now? What if I feel like doing something else by then? I know I have to be sober, and I have to plan on what I eat so I don't have gas and that I can shit before I shower and wash my ass prior to the session. It's all so much to think about. Go to the bank and maybe pick up some wine, maybe a gift.  
   
 Does anyone else ever find the whole thing just overly complex?  
   
 I usually dress nicely, and I shower well before leaving the house, but I don't usually have to be on schedule. So I'm not a slob or drunk or anything like that.  
   
 And then, you have to arrive not just on time, but you can't get there a half hour early and have a beverage while you wait either. Well, sometimes there's a Starbucks or something up the street from the hotel. But...actually very involved.  
   
 Does anybody else find this stressful? I know it's different for the providers than for the clients, but even so. You ladies go through this kind of thing?  
 

-- Modified on 7/14/2016 11:18:05 PM

It is a part of the anticipation, and anticipation is one thing that never disappoints.  

I mostly stay with gals I know already, but from time to time I come across a new gal, usually from her exposure on these boards, and enjoy getting to know them.  I wish I had the resources to do that more often.

In any case, hobbying is the high point of my life, and wish I could do so more often.  I'm hoping my business picks up and I can go back to the halcyon days of yore.

By the way, if you don't like to call yourself retired, use the term investor instead.

NYMan99401 reads

I'm not retired, but am financially secure (not wealthy), and despite one bad career decision a couple of years ago that took me off a great career track,  find myself in a low-stress/low-effort job that till pays decently - and I am simply going to "ride it" to the end.  But I want to hobby when I want to hobby....meaning basically on my own time when I'm in that mood.  The concept of planning out days is unappealing to me for many of the same reasons you outlined...who knows how I will feel on Saturday at 2pm....which is probably why I gravitate more to agencies (with a waiting bevy of potential new friends) than independents (I assume if I had more indies in my rotation, I could cut the arrangement time dramatically).  I think I will be even more this way once I retire.

Senator.Blutarsky508 reads

To me, it sounds like you're depressed and have lost your zest for life.  

As for it being too complex, I don't see it that way. It seems pretty simple to me. You see a beautiful women that you'd like to spend time with, you reach out and introduce yourself and ask if she's available at such and such a time for x hours. She responds and you get together (pun intended). What's complex about that?  

Solo mis dos centavos.

You should see his sick posts on the P&R. He thinks its "good" that 5 cops died in Dallas, so when you read his posts here, keep that in the back of your mind.

So clearly there is a lot more going on with this jackass than just being unmotivated to get laid, which is and of itself is a major red flag.

You might be right about the depression. Sort of beachcomber type of muddling through and getting uncomfortable when I have to up the energy. And the only thing about being retired is that I'm out of the rhythm of making deadlines and running a tight schedule.

GaGambler331 reads

I agree with Jack. You can't "unsay" some of the things you said on P&R, personally I hope you stay miserable with an attitude like yours.

I am not sure of all your troubles but you should seek help. When someone like yourself feels the need to trash innocent people who have been murdered, your issues are too deep for this board to solve. I wish you the best Wicked Brut but please for your own sake get some help to deal with all of these problems you have. They are treatable. Good luck to you. BB

I get it.  
Wouldn't worry about it because it's really just retirement mode.  
The only hassle I find is pre scheduling so I rarely do that.  
It's easy enough to find same day fun unless you in a rural area.

Just not having to shift energy modes from getting/selling work to doing the work to schmoozing to working out, work shopping, networking and communicating with the people I worked with--switching from all that to sleeping late and muddling around, spending time by myself, and just no longer wearing a watch or even needing to know what time of day it is--it's getting to be sort of a shock to the system when scheduling anything comes back into play.

cut yourself shaving your balls. It seems you've complicated this more than you have to. I understand the process as i enjoy knowing my date will appreciate me being as fresh as her. I want her to want to devour me as much as I want to devour her.  

I also find offering advice to someone who has seen/reviewed as many women as you awkward but here goes. You asked.  

You need a "go to" provider who'll make your life easy. It's why I prefer to have one provider I enjoy fucking and fucking as often I can afford. An ATF type. If I'm just getting out of the shower, she doesn't care, sweats and a T, she doesn't care, and if I "dress up" a bit "for her" (I host a lot) she appreciates it and enjoys unwrapping the package.  

I provide her the same courtesy. I'm currently seeing someone who usually visits straight from the gym. I don't require her to "dress up"  but when she does ... well, I like that too.  

I see her often, but have backup if our schedules don't sync, usually an agency. That offers me variety and spontaneity, less homework and no verification.  

Have you considered using an agency as your "first" stop?  



-- Modified on 7/15/2016 8:57:32 AM

I have to travel from out of state to a large southern city to see good providers (we just don't have them here). I usually do Sundays, leaving on Saturday morning and getting home Sunday evening. I'm gone 36 hours.

I have to book a hotel, get a rental car (my regular car is a sports car that's not comfortable for long drives), and make other arrangements.  

If anything goes wrong, it's a real PITA.  

When I leave the provider's place, though, it all seems worth it.

souls_harbor370 reads

I think the word you are looking for is spontaneity

I have those moments when it feels like a million pins need to align, but then realize I'm inviting that feeling. The hobby has no monopoly on stress. If I had a different line of work, there'd be a whole new set of pins to contend with. I had to let go of the concerns I was needlessly creating and learn to enjoy the ritual of preparation. I started playing music and podcasts I love while getting ready. I started filling 'dead time', such as when a client is a little late, by catching up with friends by email or going through bookmarked articles rather than counting the seconds and letting anxiety build. The point is to take each stress point and examine if it should be adjusted or discarded.

From the hobbyist vantage point, I think most of the things you discussed exist outside of the hobby. You wouldn't want a cold even without appointments and I'm sure any preventative measures due to sessions differ little from your regular routine. A civvie date would probably mean showering and being on your game, but with less guarantee of sex.  

Like breeding, the hobby has a good case both for and against it. You decide which, but remember the element of fun if you're going to participate.:-)

I remind myself that I am about to have a sexual experience that is way beyond the majority of experiences that I had before I started doing this. I wouldn't be doing this if it wasn't better.

And then I remind myself of the difficulties I endured in two marriages. That cost, though great for a time, became way more challenging than preparing to meet one of the amazing p4p ladies that I visit.  

Then I get to live by myself, the way I want to, without the drama that comes with committed relationships.  

So, now I've gotta go and shave  for today's adventure. Bye.  
Have fun!

-- Modified on 7/15/2016 8:33:56 AM

toozman338 reads

So if I understand what you're saying, you'd like the process to be as simple as ordering a pizza. I can't disagree.

I'm not retired yet, I don't really need the income so much as I need to work. I'm a pussy-o-Holic, but I'm just as much a work-o-Holic. I've set the age of 70 to retire, but when I do retire I'll have a volunteer gig set up. I just can't imagine what the hell I'd do all day when I retire, I can only play so much golf.

Unlike you evidently, I masterbate nearly every day, sometimes multiple times per day. The only exception being the 3-4 days prior to a session, which by the way is difficult for me. I like scheduling a date out as you describe, I can save up some swimmers, and in the process get horny as fuck, and to be honest, I'm always in the mood when I'm awake so I know for sure I'll be in the mood next Thursday at 7:00pm.

This scheduling of my sessions is way better than going to the bar and hoping to pick some woman up, and I have no game and not good looking so the potential woman who would go home with me would be a woman whom I'm likely not going to be attracted to. So he'll yes, schedule at a date and time with a beautiful sexy woman, who I know is great in bed and who's only purpose is to satisfy me for a few hours and I don't have to work at it. I love this life, I've never been this happy. I'll never setltle again, ever.

Newto1000214 reads

We should organize a retirement board.  Here are the criteria:

Net worth:  $5M, preferably $10M
Horny:  Sometimes, but it can be tough getting up for dates
Political Views:  To rich and old to be an angry white guy anymore.  Probably will go with Gary Johnson.
Typical Day:  Worthless bliss.
Biggest BS Artists on TER:  Gambler and Jack D.

Because I understand the complexity of setting up a date and making everything as 'ideal' as can be.  

Nonetheless, I am very appreciative when a gentleman puts in the time and effort to clean, groom, and bring gifts and/or wine. To me, that is what makes a simple rendezvous turn into an unforgettable experience.  

Sweetest Regards,
Adrienne Baptiste

it's only stressful when something else in my life unexpectedly intrudes at the same time frame as my appointed dates.  

but then that's life.  if i made a date to see a movie with some friends and suddenly my landlord calls and says she wants to get into my place to fix that problem i've been bugging her about at the exact same time, that's just the stress of life.

there's a bit of stress when i want to see a girl and our schedules never seem to align.  but again, that can happen when i want to make an appointment for any service provider and the schedules don't work.

there's nothing particularly stressful about the hobby that is unique to the hobby, except perhaps if you find yourself scratching your balls a lot after a date, and wonder if you got crabs...but you knew the job was dangerous when you took it

I can kind of relate to what you are saying and I'm not even retired yet.  Arranging a date does take more effort that I once thought it would. And you didn't even mention the worry about getting busted either by LE or SO and ruining the rest of your life.

As for the things you find stressful I would think those would be less so after you retire. I will be doing it myself soon and I hope that is true.

It is different after you retire (still have a problem with that word) only if you let your life get soon laid back that ANY structured time seems a jolt. For the first couple of years I didn't hobby at all, but I had an extremely active social life. And I had a lot of business stuff to tend to and did a little traveling and such.

It's like when you take a trip, couple of flights, 2 or 3 cities, same number of hotels, maybe a couple of scheduled events to attend and the rest free time for touristy stuff. You click into a different mode. Rushing around is just what you're doing and you enjoy it or at least take it in stride. The shifts in energy seem normal. No stress, no problem. But then, for me, when I got back home and flopped down on the couch, the mode shifted to just enjoying lazy afternoons, taking neighborhood walks when the day started cooling off, things like that. At that point if I suddenly had to catch a flight it would have seemed extremely nerve wracking.

WTF man? It's not that complicated. KEEP IT SIMPLE.

though I will start by saying Indon't find things too complicated,  It takes some time and planning, but pleasure delayed is often please enhanced.  
I was interested in your comment that you don't have to work for a living so you don't. I am in my mid 70s and have a long varied and  --for me--interesting career.  I now run a very busy highly specialized practice with 8 other professionals who report to me.  I am responsible for quality, I tend to see the most needy patients, I --like the others- cover 1 week in four (two are on at once and one des not cover.) From Friday at 5 pm until one week later I get calls day and night and often go without sleep.  I am responsible for detail, finances, quality of care, and (this is the worst) monitoring compliance with really time and soul eating record keeping because we constantly need to prove we are not cheating the government and insurers---you know how we doctors love to lie and cheat.
The point is I love what I do. I have not needed to work for many for years and yet I would almost always rather do what I do than almost anything else I could be doing.  It sound really corny but relieving suffering, prolonging a life, being really present for someone in pain or dying or losing a loved one and making a loving difference is an incredible gift I am given daily.  
Patients always ask me with a bit of anxiety if I plan to retire soon.  No way as long as I am healthy and competent.  
It does interfere with he hobby on occasion.......oh well.

Unfortunately, my situation is less lucky. I am no longer able to do what I loved doing all my life. At least it feels that way, though I suppose if I struggled hard enough for it I might find a way of "fitting into the discipline."

And you are right about pleasure deferred resulting in pleasure enhanced.

And I trust you were joking when you asserted that doctors love to cheat. I've know a lot of people in the medicine and to the best of my knowledge they have all been very honest people. That isn't so much the case with some patients, though, and I might suggest that the labor of record keeping helps keep a check on that kind of fraud.

There are 2 or 3 times a year when I actually have a few days of actual work, but...it's not the same. A chance to get together with some old work buddies. That's about the best of it.

And I work on various projects of my own, none of which gives me any serious expectations for lucrative marketing, and I'm fine with that.

You might understand my current outlook more easily than most. It is this: What I "aspire" to do is live the life I have and forget the life I want

happens to me often.

Hobby is a hassle?  

 Generally no but I have been seeing a lady  for 2 years that just doesnt do it for me anymore.  I find it a hassle to put up with the minor annoyances that have come to be when setting a date with her. This last was probably the last time I will see her. With another lady  I just started seeing things are too new to be an issue.  

When the hobby becomes a  "chore"  i will just do it less.

Posted By: WickedBrut
I don't like the word "retired," but I don't have to earn a living anymore. Sometimes I get real inspired about something and can't get it out of my mind for weeks, months, until I get it done or get enough done to drop it.  
   
 Otherwise, if I get sleepy I take a nap, I eat when I feel hungry, stay up all night if I feel like it, go off when I want, and then there's this thing about sex. I've never really been satisfied with masterbating so that's where the hobby works for me.  
   
 But sometimes the whole hobby process seems too complex. I have to research and pick out who I want to share this special time with. Then when I find her, decide on a day and time. A couple hours later that afternoon doesn't always work out. So maybe two days later early evening, say 7:00. Okay, I can deal with the anticipation, and make sure I don't have anything else going on at that time. Got to make sure I have fresh clothes ready. Hope I don't catch a cold or anything. Plan on being home to clean up and dress a couple of hours before I have to head over...it's all so much scheduling and planning that sometimes I feel the effort is a bit much.  
   
 And then, what if I'm not particularly in the mood come 7:00 a couple evenings from now? What if I feel like doing something else by then? I know I have to be sober, and I have to plan on what I eat so I don't have gas and that I can shit before I shower and wash my ass prior to the session. It's all so much to think about. Go to the bank and maybe pick up some wine, maybe a gift.  
   
 Does anyone else ever find the whole thing just overly complex?  
   
 I usually dress nicely, and I shower well before leaving the house, but I don't usually have to be on schedule. So I'm not a slob or drunk or anything like that.  
   
 And then, you have to arrive not just on time, but you can't get there a half hour early and have a beverage while you wait either. Well, sometimes there's a Starbucks or something up the street from the hotel. But...actually very involved.  
   
 Does anybody else find this stressful? I know it's different for the providers than for the clients, but even so. You ladies go through this kind of thing?  
 

-- Modified on 7/14/2016 11:18:05 PM

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