TER General Board

Here is the truth.... each woman has her own preference.
scoed 8 Reviews 429 reads
posted

So the right way to do it is to be open in your communication and listen to her and her body language. Start soft and slow and listen to her. If she wants it faster and/or harder she will let you know if the lines of communications are open. She can also let you know if she wants you to add a finger or two once you get going. One thing unless she says otherwise it isn't always best to go right for the clit. Many women need to be warmed up first. Also unless she says otherwise a good rhythm and knowing the alphabet is is good. But the most important thing is communicate, every woman is little different  and what will make one lady scream in pleasure can actually be painful for the next.

GramParsons3596 reads

ost men really enjoy giving DATY. Most men think they are really good at it. I would like to hear from the women on what men do well and not so well as far as technique goes.  As men we hate asking for directions but I think the world would be a better place if men knew what they were doing when DATY.

will all enjoy DATY more once we get past the smell emitted by the woman's pussy.  I think in theory, I have no argument with that, but can't say I've ever been confronted by that personally.  I'm guessing at $80 a pop, he remains yet unaware that there are some providers who's pussies don't smell bad.  

-- Modified on 7/14/2016 7:51:58 PM

Search the this forum for "DATY in Reviews" and check out the link.

There were some other threads on the question so searching DATY might get some additional hits

JakeFromStateFarm461 reads

My ATF once showed me a picture of her clit after some ass-clown bit it.  There was blood.  That's an extreme case but gentle is better.  There's no one "right" way to do it.  Try a few different techniques and see what works best.  Or, you could actually ask her to tell you. It's not rocket science.

And when I did, she said "NO! Bite it! Hard!!
Surprising to me but as you know, every lady is different as to what works for them and what they like, just like every guy is different. So even your point about being to rough isn't always true. Some like it rough.  
Your second to,the last sentence, ask her. Best answer.

Posted By: JakeFromStateFarm
My ATF once showed me a picture of her clit after some ass-clown bit it.  There was blood.  That's an extreme case but gentle is better.  There's no one "right" way to do it.  Try a few different techniques and see what works best.  Or, you could actually ask her to tell you. It's not rocket science.

souls_harbor433 reads

Both snarky and uninformative. No points.

Posted By: lopaw

Both trollish and uninformative. No points.

GaGambler463 reads

minus 100 points for SH for being "whiny"

"Snarky" is a fact of life on TER. The key is to be snarky AND funny. "Whiny" is only blood in the water for the rest of us.

JakeFromStateFarm344 reads

What's the problem with simply asking, "What do you like?"  All girls are different.  What works with one doesn't with another.

GaGambler375 reads

She was responding to the OP who was asking for DATY advice on a fuck board, not asking a lady "what do you like?" while in the act.  As you yourself said "All girls are different" I don't think her response was out of line at all.

I will allow for the fact that it was a bit "snarky" but I (and you) am a fan of snarky.

JakeFromStateFarm434 reads

It was a really vague first post by lopaw that could be interpreted either way.

...serious DATY to get to and you're distracting me.  
That pussy ain't gonna eat itself! :D

 

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-- Modified on 7/15/2016 4:43:02 PM

JakeFromStateFarm422 reads

Do you know us?  This is what we do.

souls_harbor376 reads

Says the man who craps on most every thread.

Posted By: GaGambler
minus 100 points for SH for being "whiny"  
   
 "Snarky" is a fact of life on TER. The key is to be snarky AND funny. "Whiny" is only blood in the water for the rest of us.

I heard from more then one lady they wish more men would ask. Every lady is a bit different. I know one lady who likes it rough and wants it sucked one. I know another that is very sensitive down there and easily prone to over stimulation and if you aren't soft she finds it painful. I would think if you don't communicate like as in ask her preference you are probably doing it wrong.

or that's my opinion on it.  I'm watching for a reaction, seeing if what I'm doing is bring about the desired results.  Every lady is different and what works on one, doesn't work for another.

But the key is communication. Body language is communication. You can ask questions and get answers without speaking if your observant.

There aren't any set rules, but I am not a fan of really theatrical porno tongue-flicking. Porn is generally more focused on the visual than what actually feels good for the participants. The tongue-flicking (which is pretty rough in some vids) and spitting really gross me out

just go by the reactions of the ladies. In my experience what each lady wants can be very different. Some like light almost teasing licks on the clit, others like a guy to just dive in there, some like their clit sucked on, others can't take that much stimulation. Some like a tongue in their vaginas, othes don't like it at all. Nothing wrong with asking, or if you get a positive physical reaction from a certain technique, keep on doing it. Part of the fun is figuring out what works.

Smallfish346 reads

Yes, yes, exactly right.  So many different ladies, so many different responses.

Advice #1...pay attention.  IME (at 45yo), most women will let you know what they like.  They will either start grinding against you, or start moaning, or simply their breath will change.  If you pay attention, you will know what works for them (penetration, oral stimulation, etc), and what pace (fast, slow, hard, soft)

Advice #2...If in doubt, be gentle and take it slow.  As men, on average, we can be a bit rougher and faster than necessary.  But also don't be shy.  "If i'm being too rough (or gentle), let me know"

So the right way to do it is to be open in your communication and listen to her and her body language. Start soft and slow and listen to her. If she wants it faster and/or harder she will let you know if the lines of communications are open. She can also let you know if she wants you to add a finger or two once you get going. One thing unless she says otherwise it isn't always best to go right for the clit. Many women need to be warmed up first. Also unless she says otherwise a good rhythm and knowing the alphabet is is good. But the most important thing is communicate, every woman is little different  and what will make one lady scream in pleasure can actually be painful for the next.

At least, that's how I see it with the advantage of 40+ years.

I can honestly say that I've only met a handful of gals who honestly enjoyed my DATY, and I know  because they encourage me to perform it, and have visceral orgasms as a result of it.

A few gals humor me by letting me perform it, but my gut tells me that they are not into it.

More often than not, gals actively dissuade me from the practice.

It's not a real big loss anyways, as I've developed born spurs in my neck as a result of performing too much of it in my earlier days, and I shouldn't even be doing it.

The vagina is one complicated piece of territory, that's for sure

chef1275495 reads

I'm a daty junkie,  and think I'm pretty good.  That being said the keys to performing great oral from my experience is the ability to give and take direction.  Every woman is different so you need to read their reactions,  listen,  and for god's sake remember there is more to giving oral then just licking the shit out her clit.

Yes all women liked to be touch and kisses differently. I prefer soft and sensual sometimes it seems as if a guy is trying to deep throat my vagina lol. I am the same way with my nipples soft and gentle please!

Posted By: chef1275
I'm a daty junkie,  and think I'm pretty good.  That being said the keys to performing great oral from my experience is the ability to give and take direction.  Every woman is different so you need to read their reactions,  listen,  and for god's sake remember there is more to giving oral then just licking the shit out her clit.  

And if you want to know how to give the best DATY ever . . . Just ask.

It's amazing that so many gentlemen seem place personal ego and pride over simple instruction! It also helps to mimic the way she performs oral. Is she sucks slow, then perhaps she likes to be licked slowly too.

Sweetest Regards,
Adrienne Baptiste

SimpleTruth359 reads

I always ask if it is a first time with a new partner (or even on a second time if I think the first didn't measure up).

It seems like nearly 90 percent of women say something non-committal or simply, "Let's see how it goes."  Not exactly informative.  Some few will actually give pointers verbally or with obvious physical cues and that is very helpful.  Others say nothing or give only very subtle cues that I can only hope I am reading correctly.  Then there are the other 10 percent that know what they like and are very upfront about informing me.  That always helps!

Generally, it seems to work out okay, but it can be difficult to tell sometimes.  It can be a little frustrating because it is awkward to ask during the process - mom always told me not to speak with my mouth full ;)

I can see that as a provider, some ladies simply don't care if a client does it "right" or not, as long as they don't get hurt in the process.  Then there are the providers that state up front, "That is not my thing," which is also helpful if somewhat disheartening.

Ladies, especially in a non-pay-for-play situation, please helps us out if we ask.  We really do want to know. Yes we can get lucky fumbling around down there sometimes, but it is much more efficient if we have a few pointers to guide us to your unique preferences.

I'm usually told I'm good at it but I never know if they are just saying that or not.  

Sorry I can't give any pointers. After doing it for over 40 years it just comes natural.

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