Dog, you have an obligation to inform ALL your sexual partners of this because depending on where your outbreaks occur, a condom which works exactly as designed may still not offer her any protection.  Because a condom may come off or break, the risk of exposure for the provider is significant.  When you add in that you may pass along the virus even when you are NOT experiencing an outbreak, the choice of whether or not to see you really IS up to the lady.

Within the bounds of a monogomous relationship that you expect to last a lifetime, Genital Herpes is manageable, assuming that's how you entered the relationship.  A previously unintroduced (and incurable) STD within a long term relationship is most likely not.

Out of concern for the health and well-being of your potential provider and ALL her clients and ALL the people those clients are involved with, you must inform her before you are even remotely intimate.

That said, remember that one in four people in the US has Genital Herpes, so you it is possible that you may find a provider who has it as well.  

One thing is for certain: your candor will be appreciated.

Yoda

Here's a link to a place that has helped Herpes feel practically 'cured', according to the original poster who shared this with us. Of course, it isn't, but the individuals on this program are practically symptom free.