TER General Board

Extreme Sexbot malfunction (Part 2)
Zangari 319 reads
posted

t looks like the AI Team programmed our 40-something Sexbot with a personality profile of "Teenage Drama Queen".  See below.  

Posted By: DebbieNoonerGirl
 Yes, the fact that a provider threatened him is wrong. Duh.
  It only took you four posts before getting to that.  Because your focus is on what's  important to you--a review score.  The OP getting blackmailed--why worry about that, it won't affect your bottom line.  BTW,  I haven't heard 'duh' used since high school (Nice touch, AI Team).
Posted By: DebbieNoonerGirl
 I kept my post concise so my message would not be confusing.  That is, I poised my question and only that so as not to muddy the waters.  The KISS principle, lol.  
 I see, you harp on a review score & ignore blackmail…because you don't want to "confuse" people by "muddying the waters".  What a ridiculous, self-serving excuse.  You are a tiresome prima donna.
Posted By: DebbieNoonerGirl
  Nowhere did I give the OP a hard time for his review.  Not at all!  I just want to know why he handled it that way… Why didn't he TALK to her?
The position your staking out:  before a TER brother writes a negative review about you,  he should call you and 'talk things over'.   Maybe  book an joint appearance on Oprah or Dr. Phil.  More ridiculous nonsense from you.  The sex trade is NSA, whether it's a provider session, a sugar date, or a hand job in an AMP.  That protects both parties.   If an SB doesn't want to see me again after a first sugar date, then she doesn't need to 'explain' anything.   You don't have to 'explain' to a client why you won't see him again.  And the OP doesn't need to explain a negative review to you.  
       
Posted By: DebbieNoonerGirl
  You know.... he tells her he feels like they haven't been connecting, and then maybe they can resolve whatever the problem is... they both wind up (oh my god!) happy with the outcome!!!!
 Four exclamation points after that last sentence--I love that.  This is a profound misconception that you have, and it's directly related to your over-inflated sense of entitlement.  A reviewer writes for the benefit of his TER brothers, not you.  A positive review may help your business, a negative one may hurt it.  But you're not the center of his universe, princess.  Hopefully that idea will percolate "through your thick malfunctioning skull".   --

First off, sorry for the alias, but based on the nature of this post I'm trying to avoid fanning any flames. The commentary below won't refer to any specific provider (nor will it include enough details for you to try to figure out of whom I speak), but rather a situation that I'm curious if anyone has ever had.

A couple months ago, I saw a provider with whom I had great appointments with in the past. Much to my disappointment, the most recent sessions were not nearly as great as they had been before. Primarily because the provider simply wasn't into it like she used to be. The first session where the service was below the bar she had set in the past, I attributed it to the fact that everyone has a bad day now and again. The second time, it demonstrated a pattern, and I felt the need to post an updated review.

The review itself was not derogatory in any way, nor did I claim that she didn't provide the services she had promised (she in fact had), but rather my review was me expressing my disappointment that this historically passionate provider had seemingly changed her attitude towards our sessions and become more distant. I even added a disclaimer saying that most hobbyiests would be thoroughly happy to schedule time with her, but those of us who want a more emotional connection (GFE rather than PSE, the latter of which she was still described as in my review) may be disappointed. My scores for her were still high based on the TER guidelines (7's).  

I realize that hearing that a client was disappointed might have hurt her feelings, but rather than reach out to me like she would have in the past, she never mentioned a thing, which I, admittedly, mistook as her understanding and realization that something had changed in her attitude. Thus, seeing as how it'd been several months since the review, and due to the fact that since my review there had been no less than 10 others who described her as being as lively as I remembered, and I REALLY did used to have a wonderful time with her in the past, I contacted her scheduler. When the timing didn't work out for a follow-up and I needed to cancel (which was the day before, in order to give plenty of notice), I got a note back saying that it was probably good I couldn't make it because I had already damaged her reputation. The tone of the note was somewhat threatening and I won't be contacting her again, much to my disappointment.

I'm not ashamed to admit this isn't the first time I've had blowback from a review. Case in point, I once had a provider blow up my hobby phone with emails, texts and voicemails because I scored her a 7 on looks and gave her a 7 on performance (even though based on TER rules, that's all she earned and in the details, I did praise her energy and attitude). Because of her screening process, she had enough personal information to out me and threatened to do so, therefore I begrudgingly edited her review to give her the "minimum score of 8's" that she demanded in order to get her to back down.

I try to be fair and honest in my reviews and sometimes that does mean that I have to express disappointment (though, thanks to what we share with one another in this community, not as often as I am expressing my satisfaction). I'm mindful of the fact that I'm writing a review of a person so I don't attack anyone, but rather take as an objective approach as I can, more so when the review is of a session that was sub-par. Nobody likes to hear they didn't meet expectations, but sometimes hearing it can motivate people to do better, which is what I assumed had happened in the most recent situation.

Needless to say, these experiences have had me questioning whether I should bother reviewing anymore. Yes, some might say, "just don't post the negative ones, and focus on the good sessions." I have a problem with that though. We all know that sessions with providers are, let's be fair, YMMV. Over the years that I've been a member of this site, I've come to identify with other reviewers who, based on our mutual reviews, have the same expectations and definitions of what makes for a great session. When I see one of these individuals post a review of a provider that I was considering based on, at times, several good reviews; Hearing that someone with whom I identify had a so-so time, makes me consider other options. (And yes, I do recognize that there are flukes; When a provider who consistently scores in the 8-10 range gets a review with 2's & 3's for scores, there's a good chance there is more to the story than what one upset hobbyiest chose to rant about, but I think we're all smart enough to realize when it's a legit bad score vs. someone who is bitter that he got crappy service by acting disrespectfully.) I mean, isn't the whole point of TER so that we can all make an informed decision about who we want to spend our time with? If we're all too afraid to post a negative review for fear of hurting someone's feelings or possible retaliation, then why even bother? I mean, a negative review doesn't mean it's an attack. They can be written respectfully and objectively so that we can all be better informed.

I can't tell you how appreciative I am of this community and I want to believe that we're not going down a path where everyone is a winner. Am I the only one who feels this way

Those so called providers should be ashamed of themselves, if they don't want to be reviewed, or reviewed less than something they might not deserve, they shouldn't be on here. It's mind boggling to see that supposed women do things like that. Yuck. Sorry to read your story and I hope you don't give up on the lifestyle because of that person. You deserve lots of love! I am also grateful for this community! I've met so many good people! :) the bad ones I just brush them off like ants, you should do the same. Kiss

You say you'd had multiple engagements with this lady in the past.  Ordinarily, that means that you and she have at least a decent rapport.  

So, this being the case, and you were unsatisfied with a couple of sessions.... why didn't you bring it to her attention, thereby giving her the opportunity to make it right, prior to writing your updated & not-so-flattering review?

As a service provider, I certainly hope that my clients would bring any shortcomings or decline in my performance to ME before airing his complaint to the general public.  
So I'm asking YOU why you did not do this, so that I can hopefully anticipate this sort of thing with my own clients.  ;-)

If you are willing to share why you took the course of action you did, this could be a learning experience for all the providers who read this thread.  Which would be a genuinely good and positive thing!!!  :-)

xoxoxoxoxoxooxoxxooxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo
NOONER: (noun) A sexual encounter during lunch hour, especially one that is illicit.  

-- Modified on 4/7/2016 5:21:39 AM

Zangari748 reads

Posted By: DebbieNoonerGirl
You say you'd had multiple engagements with this lady in the past...you and she have at least a decent rapport.  you were unsatisfied with a couple of sessions.... why didn't you bring it to her attention, thereby giving her the opportunity to make it right, prior to writing your updated & not-so-flattering review?
  The OP has ABSOLUTELY no obligation to do anything you're suggesting above.  The OP also mentioned previous extortion threats for writing a mediocre review.  But you're much more disturbed about a negative review score than the OP getting blackmailed.  That reveals a lot about you.  

 The OP sounds a lot like Zak, who should be spending his money on therapy rather than P4P.  But at least he has good intentions.  You should read Naomi's reply before you post again.  Try acting like a human rather than a greedy sexbot.  --z

Your accusation is really off-base and honestly hurts me to know you so misinterpreted my words.  

When I have problems with any type of service provider, I FIRST attempt to resolve the issue with that professional; I do not first take to Angie's list to complain about said business or person.   After making my concerns known to that person, if I am still unhappy, THEN I would write a review.  

Why is this any different?  Why should I hope to be treated in any lesser fashion than I treat others?  

I truly do hope that when my clients are unhappy, that they tell me so and give me the opportunity to make things right.

Posted By: DebbieNoonerGirl
Your accusation is really off-base and honestly hurts me to know you so misinterpreted my words.    
   
 When I have problems with any type of service provider, I FIRST attempt to resolve the issue with that professional; I do not first take to Angie's list to complain about said business or person.   After making my concerns known to that person, if I am still unhappy, THEN I would write a review.    
   
 Why is this any different?  Why should I hope to be treated in any lesser fashion than I treat others?    
   
 I truly do hope that when my clients are unhappy, that they tell me so and give me the opportunity to make things right.
jeez. Overreact much? I didn't accuse you of anything at all. I agree it is generally best to give direct feedback, especially to sole proprietor service industry professionals.  

Doesn't change the fact that most people will habitually avoid conflict. This is magnified in this type of industry where emotions and personal self worth are so entwined (correctly or incorrectly) and having such a range of professionalism.  

You asked how to best get people to let you know when unsatisfied... Best way I know is to go out of your way to open the door for constructive feedback and let them know it is appreciated. I should add that nearly no matter what that feedback is comprised of, if you want to keep getting it best response is to thank them for the feedback (which may be wrong, offensive, ridiculous, etc in your eyes) and decide what to do with info after. First time you react negatively to feedback you basically turn off that source forever.  

And lol at irony of you asking for advice on how clients can be more open with you then reading an accusation in a (potential) clients honest reply and getting hurt by it. Just shows it ain't easy for either side.  There are entire books written on the subject. First one that comes to mind is Crucial Conversations.  

A

Perhaps I am overreacting.   Being labeled a "greedy sexbot" isn't exactly a warm-fuzzy feeling.  Nor was it intended to be, obviously.  

I'm simply clarifying what I was asking, as it seemed my sentiment went astray.  :-

Zangari488 reads

Posted By: DebbieNoonerGirl
Your accusation is really off-base and honestly hurts me to know you so misinterpreted my words.  
 Mmm…no, I actually quoted your Sexbot reply in my post.  Your entire focus was questioning the OP's right to post an unflattering review.  The OP getting blackmailed didn't even register in your memory bank. The Sexbot AI Team is now bug-swatting your Empathy Subprogram.  
   
Posted By: DebbieNoonerGirl
 When I have problems with any type of service provider, I FIRST attempt to resolve the issue with that professional; I do not first take to Angie's list to complain…after making my concerns known to that person, if I am still unhappy, THEN I would write a review. Why is this any different?  
  "Why is this any different?"  OMG, another Sexbot glitch.  Let's upgrade your logical processor so that you can discern the difference between hiring a prostitute vs hiring a plumber.  

 Hiring a prostitute: It's illegal.  It can lead to extortion.  It can damage/destroy a marriage, family, career.  Not to mention that sex is often a deeply personal & emotional experience for non-sexbot humans.  

 Hiring a plumber:  None of the above.    

 I'll reboot you now.  And in Sexbot Version 2.0, I'll add GPS so you won't get lost on your way to appts.   --z

Posted By: Zangari

   
  Mmm…no, I actually quoted your Sexbot reply in my post.  Your entire focus was questioning the OP's right to post an unflattering review.  The OP getting blackmailed didn't even register in your memory bank.  
 
You read what you wanted to read, took my words in the way that suits your "TER Provider"-prejudiced mindset.  ;-)

Yes, the fact that a provider threatened him is wrong.  Duh.  

I kept my post concise so my message would not be confusing.  That is, I poised my question and only that so as not to muddy the waters.  The KISS principle, lol.  

Nowhere did I give the OP a hard time for his review.  Not at all!  I just want to know why he handled it that way.  

I'm ALWAYS interested in others' points of view.  I'd like to know his thought process.  

It really is that simple..... no agenda, no ulterior motive.... just a sincere question.  :-)

No, he wasn't  "obligated" to talk to her about his dissatisfaction.  That's not my stance at all.  Again, I never wrote that.  You simply interpreted my words the way that best suits you.

The lady he re-reviewed who then declined to re-book with him after he cancelled?  From what the OP wrote, it didn't sound like she even communicated with him.  Her  booker did, and that was the person whose tone was "threatening".  
 But he didn't say that person blackmailed him.  The one who did threaten to out him was a different person than the one he re-reviewed. Again, that was wrong.  Obviously.  

Anyway.....
My whole point was that I'd like to know why he didn't attempt to resolve the situation.  Why didn't he TALK to her?  Because I think it really could have made the situation so much better for everyone if he had just done that.  :-)

You know.... he tells her he feels like they haven't been connecting, and then maybe they can resolve whatever the problem is... they both wind up (oh my god!) happy with the outcome!!!!    

Or she might have been defensive and/or bitchy so THEN he writes the review but at least he TRIED to communicate with her about the problem.  That is, he attempted to get a better result for himself.  

Once more... I am not in any way saying he had to do it that way, should have talked to her, or owed her anything whatsoever.  I am just freaking asking WHY he did not talk to her.  That's it, that's all.  

If he can explain why he didn't feel comfortable approaching her about that, this information could be very helpful to others.
That insight could give not only myself, but other providers, ideas on how to let our own clients know that we really do want them to TALK to us if there's a problem.  So we can make them happy; make it right!  This is supposed to be FUN!! :-)

 
Yes, P4P is far more intimate than pretty much any other service provider situation and that makes it different.  

However, that difference, IMO, should lead to MORE communication.  Not less.  ;-)

Zangari320 reads

t looks like the AI Team programmed our 40-something Sexbot with a personality profile of "Teenage Drama Queen".  See below.  

Posted By: DebbieNoonerGirl
 Yes, the fact that a provider threatened him is wrong. Duh.
  It only took you four posts before getting to that.  Because your focus is on what's  important to you--a review score.  The OP getting blackmailed--why worry about that, it won't affect your bottom line.  BTW,  I haven't heard 'duh' used since high school (Nice touch, AI Team).
Posted By: DebbieNoonerGirl
 I kept my post concise so my message would not be confusing.  That is, I poised my question and only that so as not to muddy the waters.  The KISS principle, lol.  
 I see, you harp on a review score & ignore blackmail…because you don't want to "confuse" people by "muddying the waters".  What a ridiculous, self-serving excuse.  You are a tiresome prima donna.
Posted By: DebbieNoonerGirl
  Nowhere did I give the OP a hard time for his review.  Not at all!  I just want to know why he handled it that way… Why didn't he TALK to her?
The position your staking out:  before a TER brother writes a negative review about you,  he should call you and 'talk things over'.   Maybe  book an joint appearance on Oprah or Dr. Phil.  More ridiculous nonsense from you.  The sex trade is NSA, whether it's a provider session, a sugar date, or a hand job in an AMP.  That protects both parties.   If an SB doesn't want to see me again after a first sugar date, then she doesn't need to 'explain' anything.   You don't have to 'explain' to a client why you won't see him again.  And the OP doesn't need to explain a negative review to you.  
       
Posted By: DebbieNoonerGirl
  You know.... he tells her he feels like they haven't been connecting, and then maybe they can resolve whatever the problem is... they both wind up (oh my god!) happy with the outcome!!!!
 Four exclamation points after that last sentence--I love that.  This is a profound misconception that you have, and it's directly related to your over-inflated sense of entitlement.  A reviewer writes for the benefit of his TER brothers, not you.  A positive review may help your business, a negative one may hurt it.  But you're not the center of his universe, princess.  Hopefully that idea will percolate "through your thick malfunctioning skull".   --

Posted By: DebbieNoonerGirl
Your accusation is really off-base and honestly hurts me to know you so misinterpreted my words.    
   
 When I have problems with any type of service provider, I FIRST attempt to resolve the issue with that professional; I do not first take to Angie's list to complain about said business or person.   After making my concerns known to that person, if I am still unhappy, THEN I would write a review.    
   
 Why is this any different?  Why should I hope to be treated in any lesser fashion than I treat others?    
   
 I truly do hope that when my clients are unhappy, that they tell me so and give me the opportunity to make things right.
My mistake. Saw the post above mine calling you a sexbot after I replied.

GaGambler369 reads

Switch to "tree mode" and you will be able to more accurately be able to see who is responding to who.

As for the OP, my only useful suggestion is that he consider writing his reviews, especially the critical ones under an alias, just like he made his OP.

Caving into pressure or blackmail is just the same as rewarding bad behavior, if it works once the bad actors have no reason to stop.

I agree.  
That provider must have been aware that she wasn't giving the same level of service.  
And reviews are NOT written for providers, they're written for the hobbyists as part of the service.  
I'm not going to write one to placate anyone, and my expectation is that other guys write honestly what they experienced.  
Frankly, this isn't a thread that any provider should be responding to, it's meant for the guys and should stay that way on this thread.

Posted By: bocabuster
I agree.  
 That provider must have been aware that she wasn't giving the same level of service.  
 And reviews are NOT written for providers, they're written for the hobbyists as part of the service.  
 I'm not going to write one to placate anyone, and my expectation is that other guys write honestly what they experienced.  
 Frankly, this isn't a thread that any provider should be responding to, it's meant for the guys and should stay that way on this thread.
Well, alrighty then.   I shall gracefully bow out of this discussion.... and please, everyone, in future: do all providers here a favor and let us know when and where our input is unwanted.    

I think many providers will appreciate that heads-up.  ;-)

Be a smart ass all you want  
But the statement stands.  
Your input in not unbiased, it can't be

GaGambler391 reads

You do make a valid point that especially if it happened more than once it really does show a lack of stones that his first action was to write a negative review instead of going to her directly to see if there was a reason for her noticeable lack of enthusiasm.  

I know the first thing that must of come to your mind is that perhaps it was something on his end, but it's probably better if that thought comes from a man, so here goes, Maybe his breath stinks and she can't fake it anymore, or any one of a thousand other reasons, including a whole bunch that are her fault, not his.

I would think that rewriting a positive review into a negative one is warranted in certain circumstances, but I also believe it should be a last resort, one taken once you have decided AFTER you have decided to never see her again. Why in the world he would want to see her after he wrote her a negative review really is beyond me.  

Ok now that I have agreed with you, (at least partially) Where is my fucking dinner???!!!

I don't know if he should rewrite reviews, hard to say and only he can decide.  
But bottom line is this: we all have a responsibility to each other to give a heads up (pun intended) to the other guys.  
And sometimes bad reviews aren't fair or impartial. But mostly I think they're warranted when the service isn't there or is declining.  
Anyone who has been a hobbyist, or married for that matter, knows things can and d change.  
Maybe it was her off day, when it happens more than once that excuse goes out the window

GaGambler328 reads

I mean honestly, what did he expect after rewriting his review of her?  

As I said, I don't fault him for re writing the review if justified. Where I fault him is for not telling her that her service level was starting to slide before rewriting the review, the rewrite of her review should have been the "last" course of action, not the first. and once he wrote her the bad review common sense should have told him it was now time to move on to other women and put this one in his rearview mirror.

Would it really be so hard to have simply asked after the second bad session "hey babe is there something wrong? Our last couple of sessions just seem off to me"  

If he had done that, he wouldn't have to guess what was going on in her head. If he didn't like the answer THEN he could have gone ahead and rewritten the review. Doesn't that make a bit more sense to you?

I don't disagree.  
Some of these guys revert back to early childhood in this game.  
Nothing in life stays the same long term, most adults deal with it.

Posted By: DebbieNoonerGirl
You say you'd had multiple engagements with this lady in the past.  Ordinarily, that means that you and she have at least a decent rapport.    
   
 So, this being the case, and you were unsatisfied with a couple of sessions.... why didn't you bring it to her attention, thereby giving her the opportunity to make it right, prior to writing your updated & not-so-flattering review?  
   
 As a service provider, I certainly hope that my clients would bring any shortcomings or decline in my performance to ME before airing his complaint to the general public.    
 So I'm asking YOU why you did not do this, so that I can hopefully anticipate this sort of thing with my own clients.  ;-)  
   
 If you are willing to share why you took the course of action you did, this could be a learning experience for all the providers who read this thread.  Which would be a genuinely good and positive thing!!!  :-)  
   
 xoxoxoxoxoxooxoxxooxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo  
 NOONER: (noun) A sexual encounter during lunch hour, especially one that is illicit.    

-- Modified on 4/7/2016 5:21:39 AM

People are generally conflict avoidant and it's much easier to hit submit than have a conversation. Just a guess. Also, not everyone takes feedback well. If you want this kind of direct feedback(especially from regulars) you should tell them you value it.

I reviewed one girl.. a good review... she was very popular and I ended up seeing her at least 4 times.. She had announced that she would be leaving the business.. we always got along.. connected on other areas.. and I was sorry to see that she would disappear.. I scheduled a last meeting with her..
It was awful.. it was obvious that she was going through the motions.. and unlike other trysts. she was as dry as a bone.. totally turned off.. nothing.. and in my head.. I didn't want to be there with her when she was so uninterested.. so circumstances change..  I think we, as hobbyists , may fool ourselves that the girls are there only for pleasure too.. and some are.. no doubt.. but things change and all of us .. when changing jobs may bring a different attitude with us to "work" and that's what it is. Nothing is always perfect.. Providers are people too.. Did I then re-submit a bad review?.. no, there was no point. she had a ton of great one's.. over 100 as I recall.. so live & let live..

NumNumMan356 reads

I have had two similar experiences.  

The first was with an escort in the top 40. She is loaded with 10 /10s. Yet, everything about her bio is wrong. Age, smoking, menu, etc. The date was a disaster. I told her I was unhappy before I left. She threatened to blacklist me if I wrote a review. My spidy sense was up before we met, but I was desperate to meet a top 50 TER. Her reviewers fall into two categories. 1: very intermittent reviews  and 2: all 9/9 or 10/10 for random providers. An escort friend I trust told me some ladies have really developed a network of false reviewers, fake accounts, and hidden IPs to stack the reviews.  

My second encounter was with my former ATF, who just went off the rails. After a disastrous date, she told me not to write a review. It was not a threat, but she has enough personal info that I got the message.

People hate to receive unpleasant news, especially if it affects their livelihood and their sense of identity as well.  I'm glad you showed the integrity to state it as it is.  It also bolsters the argument for doing away with numerical scores as if the experience of a sexual encounter could be captured by a mere number.  It would force people to really read the reviews, and eliminate a lot of conflict as you have described.

The other gal who threatened to out you for your scoring should have been outed herself to TER and banned.  There's no place for that on here

Posted By: mrfisher
People hate to receive unpleasant news, especially if it affects their livelihood and their sense of identity as well.  I'm glad you showed the integrity to state it as it is.  It also bolsters the argument for doing away with numerical scores as if the experience of a sexual encounter could be captured by a mere number.  It would force people to really read the reviews, and eliminate a lot of conflict as you have described.  
   
 The other gal who threatened to out you for your scoring should have been outed herself to TER and banned.  There's no place for that on here.  
   
   
   
 
Fuck up escort who threatened to out hobbyist on TER

Posted By: Fancy8888
Fuck up escort who threatened to out hobbyist on TER
i fucking love you fancy

Posted By: mrfisher

 The other gal who threatened to out you for your scoring should have been outed herself to TER and banned.  There's no place for that on here.
Yes, that sort of behavior should not be tolerated.  Threatening, stalking, blackmail.... it happens on both sides of the coin, I'm sure, and the offenders' actions should be brought into the public spotlight.  

xoxooxoxoxooxoxoxoxoxoxoox

The world is full of people who are just not right in the brain.  A woman who threatens you over a  whore score is clearly bat shit crazy.  I wasn't too thrilled with my recent 7/7 but I didn't contact him lol.  I simply pouted over it and  kept it moving.  Our chemistry dictates my performance. I am not a child so I need that connection. If that connection is absent I guess I provide a  7 kind of time. Mind you a hot time isn't exactly a bad thing.  But,  as humans we all want to be the best I guess. Anyway,  consider yourself hugged and I like your alias...very clever.  😊

cuppajoe295 reads

eviews need to be read with a shaker of salt. In addition to reading between the lines, you really need to think about what has NOT been said.  In addition some meta-analysis can be useful, like checking the number and type of reviews and by whom, and other techniques for sussing out what is really going on.

For those that need provider references and get asked their board handles, its almost not worth it to review anyone unless you're totally happy.  Again, a case for using meta-analysis to gain a greater understanding.  For example when a provider with lots of advertising presence comes into your area and reviews are not popping up, maybe back channelling is the way to get some info. Granted a lot of guys don't review, but themn you have to wonder why that is

When the passion fizzles, it's time to move on. Nothing to be gained by beating a dead horse. Granted, if she was not interested in meeting with you anymore, she could have taken the initiative and not booked your appointment requests. But then again, dropping a client can be like navigating a minefield for providers, so I can understand going with the "give 'em bad service so they don't come back" route.  

At this point, I just use reviews to confirm legitimacy and avoid rip offs; I don't need the gratuitous details.

between two individuals.

The interaction between two people over time WILL change and fluctuate a bit - and that means for both, not just the woman. To some extent, people's behavior will feed off of one another.  

My point... it is normal for an experience to change over time, and it is normal for it to change for both parties. You simply can't in FACT assign all cause for changes to the other person.

If you know someone well, discuss the changes with them... see what they have to say, gather both perceptions FIRST. 90% of concerns can be addressed this way, without any ill feelings or need to surprise someone else with a public blaming or shaming. Relationships always matter, and always come first.  

I cannot imagine myself writing an updated review unless something calamitous happened... and I don't get that sense in your case. It is much better to simply move on and not leave a trail of harm to reputation or relationship in your wake.

I am curious why a provider's performance changing from an 8 to a 7 for a session or two is newsworthy.... and why a performance change necessitates a change in an appearance score as well. That seems odd at least, petty at most.

I think review manipulation is a separate topic, but since you brought it up:

IMHO, review manipulators on both sides should be banned and delisted... I mean a reviewers reviews removed the same as a delisted provider's reviews and posts would be.  

A thought? Is writing a "lesser" review in the hopes of getting better performance in the future a form of review manipulation

I agree that the OP took the coward's way out. He could have tried saying "hey, is everything ok? You don't seem to be having as much fun with me as we had before," and felt it out from there. I don't see how he thought a bad review would motivate her to "prove him wrong" on his next visit.  

-- Modified on 4/7/2016 7:48:22 AM

coercion was intended by the OP. Just thinking out loud a bit about how subtle coercion and manipulation can be at times.

I also agree with him that fundamentally blowback from a "negative" review is just wrong.

First of all I will respond with out an alias... IMHO a lot of cowardice posting going on here. I understand the OP's use of alias but others....

Ill start with I AGREE 100% with Nooner and Zen.   The OP had seen this provider in his words "  whom I had great appointments with in the past"  This implies that he had seen her on multiple occasions.  You would think he had established some sort of rapport and relationship with this "woman" (note I didn't just say provider).  I agree with Nooner.....why the fuck couldn't he simply ask her if something was wrong and tactfully let her know that the sessions had lost their spark.  IMHO  Posting a bad review was a DICK!! move. And then to want to see her again afterwards and be surprised that she rather not.  

I  had this same scenario happen to me in the last week. A lovely young lady whom I have seen twice in the past whom I gave a glowing review provider me with a very lackluster and quite detached session.   At the end of the session I asked her if something was wrong? And let her know what was wrong with the session. I even used the words unresponsive and detached.  She apologized and I think she was sincere. Never would it dawn on me to run the review board like a spoiled petulant child and retract my original glowing review.  Now it is my decision to see her again or not.  

 I have a couple ATF that I have seen 10-30 times over the years.  They are my ATF because of the their services and the connection that we share. But even they have bad days when the session wasn't a 8or9....... I would never downgrade their review unless something  extremely dramatic changed.  

What the fuck is up with downgrading her looks.......again that's a BITCH move.... Sounds like you were either trying to get her back.....or worst coerce her into giving you a better session in the future...both of which are kinda fucked up if you ask me.

Guys you have to remember that providers are  "women" first. They are not sexbots....They have feelings just like you and I.  This is also their current profession.  Let me fuck with your money and see how you like it. Do you go running to your lawyers or accountants professional review board after having years of positive interaction and service to complain that he just isn't as good as he was when you first met him..... HELL NO! If you are no longer satisfied hopefully you act like a fuckin man and let him know you are not happy with the level  of services he is providing. If this doesn't work.... you get a new guy.... You move on....you don't try to fuck up his money.

sorry for the long rant...
Got to get back to work...so I can pay for some new booty tonight..
Haw

Hahahaha OMG I laughed so hard thank you, great response hahahaha love it!

The longer I have been in this hobby, the longer I continue to encounter such childish behavior.  Not at anyone in particular, but we are all supposed to be adults in an adult entertainment field.  Whether you're a provider or a client I believe it is our obligation to a) Not be a jerk and act childish b) Provide the best possible service to ensure a return or good review c) Understand that big boy rules apply.  

I see bunch of posts from clients who have either been blackmailed, or pressured to give a 10/10 on a review when it isn't warranted.  Not writing a review only hurts the client that is doing his due diligence and trying to decide on whether to see that provider.  Whether the session is $300/400 or $600 has nothing to do with the fact that if her service sucks, then she should be reviewed as such.  The saying "oh she had a bad day" is thrown around a bunch.  But we are talking about cash money here, this isn't Monopoly play money.  I understand that there are some high rollers in this community and money s no object to them, but for the majority of us this is a significant chunk out of our income.  So if I venture out to spend $400 to $600 to see a provider, I don't want to encounter a "bad day or hour."  And if a provider realizes early on that it is going to be such, although I would be disappointed if she called to cancel, I would appreciate it much more than just going through with a half assed session.  Or if she does go through with it and is not into it, then be prepared to deal with an honest review of the session.  

To Debbienooner: Thank you for your professionalism, if a client can indeed come to you with his concerns that recent sessions have not been up to par without being chastised, then you are a gem in this field, because that is certainly not the case with the majority of providers.  From sheer observation on this board I have heard some horror stories of jealousy over another provider receiving higher scores as well as threats of black mail and cohortion for higher ratings.    

There is too much political correctness when it shouldn't be.  It's is about P4P and reviews of such

If I'm having "a bad day" I won't see anyone, because that at the end of the day, affects MY business. It has happened in the past years ago, where I've felt sad or really down, and I saw a gentleman. It was awful I learned my lesson that one time, I also apologized to the guy and he saw me again and everything was back to normal. I'll let my guys know 1000% of the time if I'm not feeling good to see them and I'll tell them why not because that's how you build some sort of trust. It's a business, great customer service and good ethical habits is the building block to a great business. If a gentleman had concerns about my behavior I want to know! I agree with Debbie on that as well.  

I may be a provider but I believe in my own code of ethics, these HOOKERS blackmailing gentlemen and threatening them for 10/10 reviews? What the actual fuck. That's not ethical. I have been in this a long while and I guess I was blind. Because I am just learning about this now. Wow. I have no respect for those individuals. If I see a gentleman you better believe our session is gonna rock because, I'm fucking fantastic and I'm genuine, and his review will always be genuine, I pride myself in my service and to see undeserving hookers up there, infuriates me.  

These gentlemen need to get their shit together and not be afraid, cus at the end of the day if she has info on you, you know where she works, it's not that hard to blackmail her back if she tries to manipulate you with threats, also you can report her to TER if you have messages as proof you can send the messages to them as proof. This behaviour is unacceptable as well as gentlemen manipulating ladies with services, if they don't do something the guys give them a bad review? I read that on another comment. If a gentleman tries to manipulate me with reviews,one he's not a gentleman, and two he better hope it doesn't piss me off that he tries to manipulate me. Cus I don't take that shit.. what are we five? Ok I'm really done now bye lol.  

Posted By: davincib1
The longer I have been in this hobby, the longer I continue to encounter such childish behavior.  Not at anyone in particular, but we are all supposed to be adults in an adult entertainment field.  Whether you're a provider or a client I believe it is our obligation to a) Not be a jerk and act childish b) Provide the best possible service to ensure a return or good review c) Understand that big boy rules apply.    
   
 I see bunch of posts from clients who have either been blackmailed, or pressured to give a 10/10 on a review when it isn't warranted.  Not writing a review only hurts the client that is doing his due diligence and trying to decide on whether to see that provider.  Whether the session is $300/400 or $600 has nothing to do with the fact that if her service sucks, then she should be reviewed as such.  The saying "oh she had a bad day" is thrown around a bunch.  But we are talking about cash money here, this isn't Monopoly play money.  I understand that there are some high rollers in this community and money s no object to them, but for the majority of us this is a significant chunk out of our income.  So if I venture out to spend $400 to $600 to see a provider, I don't want to encounter a "bad day or hour."  And if a provider realizes early on that it is going to be such, although I would be disappointed if she called to cancel, I would appreciate it much more than just going through with a half assed session.  Or if she does go through with it and is not into it, then be prepared to deal with an honest review of the session.    
   
 To Debbienooner: Thank you for your professionalism, if a client can indeed come to you with his concerns that recent sessions have not been up to par without being chastised, then you are a gem in this field, because that is certainly not the case with the majority of providers.  From sheer observation on this board I have heard some horror stories of jealousy over another provider receiving higher scores as well as threats of black mail and cohortion for higher ratings.    
   
 There is too much political correctness when it shouldn't be.  It's is about P4P and reviews of such.    
   
 
-- Modified on 4/7/2016 8:56:01 AM

Sadly it doesn't work like that on this board.  If a client discloses that he has had a bad session with a provider, he is chastised and ridiculed, thats even if his post makes it to the board.  I once wrote a review which was an honest assessment of what went on and encountered so much red tape from admin that I just decided, after having it sent back 3 or 4 times, to not submit the review.  Excluding some sickos who want to exceed what is on a providers menu, I think the majority of reviewers have a decent moral compass and understand what is accepted when seeing a provider, there are some clueless exceptions, as with any profession that requires human interaction.  

It's amazing how many posts I have seen where a client has come to the board for advice on whether or not to write a review that was less than pleasing and has been chastised, manipulated, or advised to just forget about it and not write the review.  On the subject of blackmail, and or a client returning the favor.  This is frowned upon, and again, most review sites/admin will not allow it.  A provider can have a clients number/email, post it on several blogs or ban lists, ruin his name and in the majority of circumstances, clients (who are trying to remain as under the radar as possible) will not retaliate because he has a livelihood to consider, as well as family, friends etc to think about.  It really is disheartening to even be discussing these types of acts, but this is the world we live in.

Aliases: There is a reason for it, some clients have ATF's who get jealous when they write reviews for other girls.  I recently saw a provider who told me that one of her clients wrote a review on her, with higher scores than his ATF, and was excluded from seeing said provider because of this.  I get that when you see a woman for some time feelings develop, although they may not be romantic, we are humans, and feelings do come into the equation.

GaGambler434 reads

In his first situation, I believe "re" writing the review should have been his last course of action, not his first and I think he very much shares in the blame, especially for expecting a warm welcome from her after writing her a negative review, even if deserved. This first scenario is hardly a black and white issue, it looks like there are a LOT of grey areas here.

Now his second scenario is completely different, this is a black and white issue where the hooker was plainly at fault and it's pretty easy for all of us to agree that this type of behavior most definitely should not be tolerated here.

and like you, I do stand by my original advice which was for him to write his future reviews under an alias.

I didn't know guys could write reviews under aliases, and wow I agree, both are at fault for 2 different things, she's an asshole, and he's somewhat of an asshole for updating the review cus he felt uncared for after things have changed with her, and then trying to book again. No honey talk to me let's fix it or let's end it.  

Either way all those things make me mad. Lol

The second situation is entirely different... I agree with GA Gambler and most on this board that that kinda BS should never be tolerated.

 The whole thing about never writing negative reviews is ridicules, I just counted my neg reviews and I have 50+ less than 7 reviews and nearly 30 that are 6 and below.... You got to take the good with the bad.

I saw a provider who delivered as advertised on service, granted she was about 25-30 minutes late due to traffic but she kept me informed which I appreciated. I just sat in the lobby of her hotel and waited. After our session I sent her a note asking to review her with an 8/9 score. I was surprised to get and email back asking me to do a 9/9 or higher. I was taken aback an 8 is really hot. Needless to say I did not write the review because I didn't want to rock the boat. You never know what someone might do if you piss them off.

JakeFromStateFarm378 reads

This is one reason why the review system is f**ked up here.  As some have already said, if you want to write an honest review do it under your alias.

You just bored her. And following you post you can bore somewhere else.  There are many other men with whom she will enjoy the date. Your updated review is just showed your disappoitment and no one knows why to write it too. To inform all of your experiences with this particular escort and "caution" all others are childish. Xo

on the other hand negative reviews can be a two way street.  i have heard from many a lady about fake reviews they have gotten, or even worse, reviews which leave out pertinent details, ie, how the client was a jerk in so many ways (asking for more time, demanding services not offered, asking for bare back, etc) and made the lady uncomfortable, thus leading to a bad session.

if a lady has generally a certain average, and i see a review below that average, i usually think there was something going on during the session that did not get put into the review.

ter admin says changes are coming for the review process, i only hope these changes help to weed out the falsehoods and exaggerations, eliminate the gratuitous salacious details, and concentrate on whether the provider delivers as promised and is worth the trip.

while I wouldn't write a review with low scores, it's not necessary as  the sessions are complete, the fun and passion has dwindled.  

I not only expect the passion, which is why I've returned again and again, it's what I'm paying for, or its just a fuck which I can get anywhere, anytime. I prefer more and return again and again when I find it. It's my byline. Have Fun. Stay Safe. REPEAT.  

I've brought this up with an "elite" provider before in as nice a way as possible, and she didn't respond kindly. But rather abruptly said we shouldn't see each other again. Hello. Excuse me. She'd call me up to keep me up to date with her life and her appearances, so it wasn't like she didn't trust me. She stayed in contact when she semi retired
She just didn't want to talk about not bringing her A game.  

I'm far from a newbie (lmoao) and totally aware of YMMV and a woman having an off day. But two in a row? I have off days too (physical issues). But that's on my dime and I'm not dumping on her.
Im also disappointed if Im not delivering reciprocal pleasure. Or if she's not open to it. For me, that's worse than me not cumming. But she doesn't seem that interested in that either. 😩😩

So I'm not gonna get into every point the OP raises, just what I read as the crux of his post. Performance down with a favorite provider.  

Sadly, I feel like I'm there now.

When I first started seeing her the passion was more than I expected and stayed at that level for a good number of visits, but then all at once she started phoning it in...felt like going through the motions, merely performing a service...I gave her a couple more chances but the passion remained absent and now she won't be hearing from me again...

And it sucks...

Its called life...... Same shit happens in real life relationships. But in real life you have this thing called love that hopefully pulls you through those times.   Unfortunately in the pay for play world you dont have that.....

I read this shit and so happy to be retired. Some of you just get entirely wrapped up in this world. I mean, you should print your post and store it in a time capsule. Break that shit open in 20 years if you're not 80 now and hopefully you'll be wiser and know just how pathetic that post sounds.

Posted By: WitnessProtection1234
First off, sorry for the alias, but based on the nature of this post I'm trying to avoid fanning any flames. The commentary below won't refer to any specific provider (nor will it include enough details for you to try to figure out of whom I speak), but rather a situation that I'm curious if anyone has ever had.  
   
 A couple months ago, I saw a provider with whom I had great appointments with in the past. Much to my disappointment, the most recent sessions were not nearly as great as they had been before. Primarily because the provider simply wasn't into it like she used to be. The first session where the service was below the bar she had set in the past, I attributed it to the fact that everyone has a bad day now and again. The second time, it demonstrated a pattern, and I felt the need to post an updated review.  
   
 The review itself was not derogatory in any way, nor did I claim that she didn't provide the services she had promised (she in fact had), but rather my review was me expressing my disappointment that this historically passionate provider had seemingly changed her attitude towards our sessions and become more distant. I even added a disclaimer saying that most hobbyiests would be thoroughly happy to schedule time with her, but those of us who want a more emotional connection (GFE rather than PSE, the latter of which she was still described as in my review) may be disappointed. My scores for her were still high based on the TER guidelines (7's).  
   
 I realize that hearing that a client was disappointed might have hurt her feelings, but rather than reach out to me like she would have in the past, she never mentioned a thing, which I, admittedly, mistook as her understanding and realization that something had changed in her attitude. Thus, seeing as how it'd been several months since the review, and due to the fact that since my review there had been no less than 10 others who described her as being as lively as I remembered, and I REALLY did used to have a wonderful time with her in the past, I contacted her scheduler. When the timing didn't work out for a follow-up and I needed to cancel (which was the day before, in order to give plenty of notice), I got a note back saying that it was probably good I couldn't make it because I had already damaged her reputation. The tone of the note was somewhat threatening and I won't be contacting her again, much to my disappointment.  
   
 I'm not ashamed to admit this isn't the first time I've had blowback from a review. Case in point, I once had a provider blow up my hobby phone with emails, texts and voicemails because I scored her a 7 on looks and gave her a 7 on performance (even though based on TER rules, that's all she earned and in the details, I did praise her energy and attitude). Because of her screening process, she had enough personal information to out me and threatened to do so, therefore I begrudgingly edited her review to give her the "minimum score of 8's" that she demanded in order to get her to back down.  
   
 I try to be fair and honest in my reviews and sometimes that does mean that I have to express disappointment (though, thanks to what we share with one another in this community, not as often as I am expressing my satisfaction). I'm mindful of the fact that I'm writing a review of a person so I don't attack anyone, but rather take as an objective approach as I can, more so when the review is of a session that was sub-par. Nobody likes to hear they didn't meet expectations, but sometimes hearing it can motivate people to do better, which is what I assumed had happened in the most recent situation.  
   
 Needless to say, these experiences have had me questioning whether I should bother reviewing anymore. Yes, some might say, "just don't post the negative ones, and focus on the good sessions." I have a problem with that though. We all know that sessions with providers are, let's be fair, YMMV. Over the years that I've been a member of this site, I've come to identify with other reviewers who, based on our mutual reviews, have the same expectations and definitions of what makes for a great session. When I see one of these individuals post a review of a provider that I was considering based on, at times, several good reviews; Hearing that someone with whom I identify had a so-so time, makes me consider other options. (And yes, I do recognize that there are flukes; When a provider who consistently scores in the 8-10 range gets a review with 2's & 3's for scores, there's a good chance there is more to the story than what one upset hobbyiest chose to rant about, but I think we're all smart enough to realize when it's a legit bad score vs. someone who is bitter that he got crappy service by acting disrespectfully.) I mean, isn't the whole point of TER so that we can all make an informed decision about who we want to spend our time with? If we're all too afraid to post a negative review for fear of hurting someone's feelings or possible retaliation, then why even bother? I mean, a negative review doesn't mean it's an attack. They can be written respectfully and objectively so that we can all be better informed.  
   
 I can't tell you how appreciative I am of this community and I want to believe that we're not going down a path where everyone is a winner. Am I the only one who feels this way?  
   
 

Posted By: Fancy8888
 
   
Posted By: WitnessProtection1234
First off, sorry for the alias, but based on the nature of this post I'm trying to avoid fanning any flames. The commentary below won't refer to any specific provider (nor will it include enough details for you to try to figure out of whom I speak), but rather a situation that I'm curious if anyone has ever had.  
     
  A couple months ago, I saw a provider with whom I had great appointments with in the past. Much to my disappointment, the most recent sessions were not nearly as great as they had been before. Primarily because the provider simply wasn't into it like she used to be. The first session where the service was below the bar she had set in the past, I attributed it to the fact that everyone has a bad day now and again. The second time, it demonstrated a pattern, and I felt the need to post an updated review.  
     
  The review itself was not derogatory in any way, nor did I claim that she didn't provide the services she had promised (she in fact had), but rather my review was me expressing my disappointment that this historically passionate provider had seemingly changed her attitude towards our sessions and become more distant. I even added a disclaimer saying that most hobbyiests would be thoroughly happy to schedule time with her, but those of us who want a more emotional connection (GFE rather than PSE, the latter of which she was still described as in my review) may be disappointed. My scores for her were still high based on the TER guidelines (7's).    
     
  I realize that hearing that a client was disappointed might have hurt her feelings, but rather than reach out to me like she would have in the past, she never mentioned a thing, which I, admittedly, mistook as her understanding and realization that something had changed in her attitude. Thus, seeing as how it'd been several months since the review, and due to the fact that since my review there had been no less than 10 others who described her as being as lively as I remembered, and I REALLY did used to have a wonderful time with her in the past, I contacted her scheduler. When the timing didn't work out for a follow-up and I needed to cancel (which was the day before, in order to give plenty of notice), I got a note back saying that it was probably good I couldn't make it because I had already damaged her reputation. The tone of the note was somewhat threatening and I won't be contacting her again, much to my disappointment.  
     
  I'm not ashamed to admit this isn't the first time I've had blowback from a review. Case in point, I once had a provider blow up my hobby phone with emails, texts and voicemails because I scored her a 7 on looks and gave her a 7 on performance (even though based on TER rules, that's all she earned and in the details, I did praise her energy and attitude). Because of her screening process, she had enough personal information to out me and threatened to do so, therefore I begrudgingly edited her review to give her the "minimum score of 8's" that she demanded in order to get her to back down.  
     
  I try to be fair and honest in my reviews and sometimes that does mean that I have to express disappointment (though, thanks to what we share with one another in this community, not as often as I am expressing my satisfaction). I'm mindful of the fact that I'm writing a review of a person so I don't attack anyone, but rather take as an objective approach as I can, more so when the review is of a session that was sub-par. Nobody likes to hear they didn't meet expectations, but sometimes hearing it can motivate people to do better, which is what I assumed had happened in the most recent situation.  
     
  Needless to say, these experiences have had me questioning whether I should bother reviewing anymore. Yes, some might say, "just don't post the negative ones, and focus on the good sessions." I have a problem with that though. We all know that sessions with providers are, let's be fair, YMMV. Over the years that I've been a member of this site, I've come to identify with other reviewers who, based on our mutual reviews, have the same expectations and definitions of what makes for a great session. When I see one of these individuals post a review of a provider that I was considering based on, at times, several good reviews; Hearing that someone with whom I identify had a so-so time, makes me consider other options. (And yes, I do recognize that there are flukes; When a provider who consistently scores in the 8-10 range gets a review with 2's & 3's for scores, there's a good chance there is more to the story than what one upset hobbyiest chose to rant about, but I think we're all smart enough to realize when it's a legit bad score vs. someone who is bitter that he got crappy service by acting disrespectfully.) I mean, isn't the whole point of TER so that we can all make an informed decision about who we want to spend our time with? If we're all too afraid to post a negative review for fear of hurting someone's feelings or possible retaliation, then why even bother? I mean, a negative review doesn't mean it's an attack. They can be written respectfully and objectively so that we can all be better informed.  
     
  I can't tell you how appreciative I am of this community and I want to believe that we're not going down a path where everyone is a winner. Am I the only one who feels this way?  
     
 

These are like movie or restaurant reviews.  I used to watch Siskle and Ebert (dating myself.)  I practically never agreed with their reviews, even when they split on them!!  Negative reviews for movies can cost the film millions of dollars in lost ticket sales.  Restaurants can go out of business due to bad reviews.   So of course TER reviews can affect the bottom line for these providers.

As a client, I read through the reviews and try to pick up on the common threads.  Forget the ratings -- there are commonly 10's and 5's for the same appearance and performance.  I think the overall average is probably the safest bet and neither clients nor providers should stress too much over an occasional less than stellar review

Register Now!