Carolinas

Re: Why?angry_smile
Durhamdrew 19 Reviews 698 reads
posted

Talk to the provider about it. Give the benefit of the doubt to the ladies otherwise you're not being very fair. It might just be your perception and the provider might just be following your lead. You have to have a candid conversation with the next provider you sense that feeling with ... immediately, not after the session. I know I've read providers wrong in the past and the only way to get to the bottom is to talk. After all, it's your dime.

I have seen a few fbsm providers and while each experience has been positive, I feel that some providers judge or withhold service because of my appearance.  I do have excessive weight, I have a stomach with love handles and thick thighs, but I am still very mobile (can touch and see my toes asking with other body parts).  Other than that, I am fairly average.  I always show up well dressed ( slacks & polo) and freshly showered and fresh breath.  I wanted to ask the lovely ladies and the gentlemen what your experiences have been with having heavier clients.  I have stopped seeing providers because I have been extra self aware ( more than usual) about this.  Thanks in advance.

every lady has her preferences on clients to see or not see. As mentioned by the lady above, I am more concerned with being treated with respect and spending time with gentlemen that hygiene conscious.  We are all created to be different sizes and shapes and I believe how you treat people matters far more than appearance.

xoxo

very well said, Kourtney...  You sound like a real nice lady and fun to meet with.

Why are you "extra self aware"? I don't think a provider is being very professional if she is making comments about your weight to you so I don't think that would be the case. We are all human after all, but we pay the providers to put of an act for us. Are you saying you don't believe the act?

Some actually love sex  
A professional would not complain about a little extra around the middle during a meeting
I suggest hiring professionals  who don't act

But they all say it's not an act. Just read the reviews and see how many clients got multiple Os from providers and they were real ones too.  ;) I don't mind a little acting as long as it's "good" acting.

like I don't have 5 pounds of belly fat and a reviewer said that
It's no different than I gave her multiple O
reviewers sometimes lie and they sugar coat
I always hope for honesty

Just because you've never made a connection with a provider doesn't mean they all are acting all of the time. Obviously sometimes the connection isn't there. Sometimes it's there in spades. If I do a review and I say that a provider had an O it is because of the evidence that I have learned to recognize to mean she had an O. Have you ever been inside a woman and had the temperature of her crotch climb so quickly you could actually feel it? And when she is so wet that it's literally dripping? And you can taste her excitement during a heated bout of DATY?

I have. It doesn't always happen but it does more often that not. And I most definitely am not a Bruce Willis or whoever the latest "heart throb" is from the movie industry. I just try to pay attention and do what she says or indicates she wants.

yeah some act and some dont.  And sometimes its hard  to tel

"No, I understand why you were late, it's ok."

"I understand you were in a hurry and didn't have time to get ready. You still look sexy in those sweatpants"

"I could listen to you talk all night"

"You give the best blow jobs of any girl I've been with."

"Really? I didn't notice you'd gain weight since our last visit"

 

Posted By: DURHAMDREW63
But they all say it's not an act. Just read the reviews and see how many clients got multiple Os from providers and they were real ones too.  ;) I don't mind a little acting as long as it's "good" acting.

You forgot my personal favorite, you "forgot" to shave your legs and snatch again That's ok just speak in a French accent and we'll role play a bit.

Warning:  /Mangina Rant_On

all the time, and some are not acting most of the time.  But it can be hard to tell.  Some things that I was told by one provider seemed contradictory and I found out later that they were both true.  It was a provider that I really admire - not love - admire for her bravery, honesty, intelligence, wit (and incredible looks and skills).  I was glad to get that cleared up.

When I started seeing a girl that I have been seeing regularly now for quite a while, I had a talk with her explaining that I didn't want any well-meant lies, faked O's or other embellishments to our relationship, just be yourself and treat me like a friend with benefits.  We had already established some chemistry, so I was willing to take this chance.

The resulting honesty in our relationship has been wonderful for both of us.  She has helped me in some very difficult times for me in profound ways that I won't discuss and I have helped her with some of her problems (non-financial), just as friends do for each other.  We don't have many secrets from each other; we both know about each others' dirty laundry and that's OK.

Yes, I still bring the envelope every week and recognize the limits of our relationship, but it is nice to know that the relationship that we have is real, if limited.  It is very relaxing/comforting/ yet exciting to have some depth and stability to our relationship so when I come in the door, I know that I'm going to be seeing the same real person I did last week and we can continue to build on the same base.

I don't think that this is the only provider-client relationship like this.  I hope that it's not.  There's no reason for an Us vs. Them mentality or deception in the business.  We're just partners in a business transactions that can get incredibly personal at times and we are all human beings with emotions and worthy of respect.

If other clients want to treat providers as disposable fuck-toys and providers to treat clients as interchangeable envelope deliverymen, that's their business and OK by me.  If other participants choose to be a bit more genuine and personal about things, that's nobody's business but our own.  

/Rant_Off

I think you nailed it. To be treated as a interchangeable envelope delivery man or ATM is insulting.   The worst part is we know it.

No provider made actual comments about my weight (I would just leave if that occured).  It is really a change of attitude & tone from when we talked on the phone and when they first see me from the chest up (very friendly, high energy and pleasant) to when I walk through the door and they get the full profile (energy goes way down and turns to more of a business deal).  I know I am paying for an act, but it seems that the act abruptly changes when I walk in the room.

-- Modified on 7/14/2014 9:10:07 PM

Talk to the provider about it. Give the benefit of the doubt to the ladies otherwise you're not being very fair. It might just be your perception and the provider might just be following your lead. You have to have a candid conversation with the next provider you sense that feeling with ... immediately, not after the session. I know I've read providers wrong in the past and the only way to get to the bottom is to talk. After all, it's your dime.

Dude, face to face will always be different from the online personna. I think you are sensitive and you are seeing things that arent really there. For me if I think about the acting going on it will ruin it for me.  But then is she acting?  Only her hairdresser knows for sure.

I don't expect Idris Elba/Bradley Cooper/Joe Manganiello whenever I open the door but they'll sure be treated as if they look like them :). It's a matter of respect and you came for a good time (as I want a good time) and I plan to give it. If they can't show their appreciation properly they don't deserve a repeat or even you staying. I mean if you can visibly see disappointment in their faces and the energy in the room go down no sooner than you step in it you shouldn't stay. Even if you don't look like a fitness model you still deserve to be treated like a king.

-- Modified on 7/17/2014 11:18:52 AM

And they each have their own specifications sometimes beyond grooming . . but don't feel self conscious over it because chemistry also plays a part. Just be yourself, open and have fun. As long as you are clean showered and groomed and toilet paper isn't stuck in your ass (just kidding) lol I am open to most body types . . I am a super spinner sooo it's easy for me to get around ;)

Adriana~

I am too old to believe that we are all blind to body-types and appearance, but  the reality is that "average" in 2014 SE USA, including the Carolinas, is about 30% bigger than it was in 1964 and that includes all ages, all races, both sexes and all combinations thereof. While it would be wonderful if we all had chiseled bodies and the time and energy it takes to get and maintain such physiques, most of us are , in fact, "average". That being said, a true professional is one who constantly seeks to improve their understanding of their clients and expand/enhance their  skillset to the benefit of their clients, and there are definitely techniques, touches and toys that work better for and with folks with plenty of bulk. There are such professionals here in the Carolinas and you just need to find them. When you do find them, you will understand  completely that we don't have to be built like David Beckham, or Victoria Beckham,  to get, or to give, the ride of a lifetime.  

Play safe, and don't text (or read TER posts) while driving!

I always feel bad when I give a compliment to one of my clients because I think "why would they believe me? They probably just think my whole personality is a lie/act."  
It hurts my feelings when I can see it in their eyes that they don't think I'm being honest.

Even if my client is not very attractive to me, I always pick out SOMETHING about them that I do like.

Some of the best sex I've had with my clients are from over weight men.  
It makes me feel so horrible for you that you have stopped seeing providers because of this.  

I bet you would feel a lot better if you set a goal weight and and reached it.  
My ex felt he was over weight and he worked hard in the gym and now he looks completely different and his health has improved greatly! He made a wonderful choice for himself.

Thank you for your honesty.  I always give honest compliments to any lady I am seeing or talking with.  

I am working on losing weight, I have already dropped 20 lbs and I do have a goal in mind.  

I wrote this post, to see if I was the only heavy person who had experienced this or if it was just a couple of bad experience.  I have had seen providers who did not seem to mind (or act like it didn't (: ).  It was just having consecutive experience where it did that made me take a break.

I just recently found out that not all providers are insincere when they make a compliment, but as clients we become jaded and tend to think providers BS us most of the time because ... they do. Sometimes it's funny. Most of the time it's not. I know one hobbyist who laughs about a provider he's seen a few times who tells him a different story every time about what type of graduate degree she's working on. I know of an agency where EVERY girl I have seen has told me her "real" name. I don't care what their real name is, but I'm getting the impression that it's just a way to instill "trust".

I've had a few providers tell me that they "think of me as a friend" However, I only actually believed one and that wasn't easy for me, which hurt her feelings and in the end made me feel like an ass. For example, I got a text from her recently saying she wanted to stop by to hang out for a bit. I mistook that for a date, but she just wanted to stop by and say "hi". I was totally confused. As clients we are aware of boundaries and we accept them, but when providers "step out" of those boundaries we get confused and tend not to believe it.

....especially when I'm nothing short of a straight-shooter. If I compliment something about you just take the damn compliment! lol

Bro, don't let that bug you.  I''ve been working out for decades.  I'm not writing this for ego, rather to tell you that I've encountered providers who don't even mention it.  I think that personality matters with the ladies as much as to some of us guys.  Banging a centerfold does nothing for me if she just lays there.  My point is, we all have different attrbutes that make us interesting to the ladies.  If you're nice to her, she'll appeciate that much more than a flat belly.  So don't sweat it and have fun!

Panthera12773 reads

The look of relief that I usually get says it all. I wouldn't expect too many providers to admit that they give better service to us then to the fat guys since their clientele base consists of mainly overweight middle aged or older men. Some do have better tolerance the others.

I would recommend that you see some of the older providers or if you can handle it, some of the chubby ones. They will probably be less jaded and need the money. It will be a win win.

Teddy Bears out there need to be touched, in my opinion even more. Not just a hand job kinda touch, but real touches, like brush strokes on a blank canvas. That is how I approach gentlemen I meet.

I tell them it's their lucky day, because I am so flexible I can give them great spinning moves too. My advice to Teddy Bears who want hands and lips all over them....be squeaky clean.

It sounds like you are saying Chubby providers don't make as much as regular gals. I think we have a few posters on here who fall into the chubby category and they are getting  high review ratings and the norm and above in donations or maybe you think the chubby girls only deserve the chubby boys?

There are people on this forum guys and gals who have medical problems that cause weight issues.

I wish more people would eat healthier and exercise so they can live a long happy life.

PS
A Teddy Bear  might have better manners than the GQ, who when he sits down on the couch asks you if he is the best looking guy you've met in the hobby?  This has happened to me many times.  

 
Just sayi

Just remember to compliment him on his Johnson size. Narcicisits need love too. :)

This gentleman is having some self esteem issues about his weight and you're not helping.

Good looks may be the icing on the cake with some ladies, but I can tell you that a fit guy with a crappy attitude will never trump a guy who is overweight and a total sweetheart.

And for the record I'm not referring to you when I'm talking about a crappy attitude BCD. I wouldn't know about that! ;-)

Steph (one of those old broads) xoxo

Panthera12683 reads

If the gentleman is having self esteem issues he can hit the gym and stop eating fast food. Same with the providers. We have too much of the PC bullshit in this country while too many people are overweight and that includes America's children. I may be crass, but what I say is true.

You and Julia are the hottest MILF's in the area. You are not keeping yourselves that way by eating mass quantities of processed and fast foods and laying around the house. Most people can be healthier and thinner by not being so lazy.

unless four legged with fur counts! ;-) And I don't consider myself thin either, I have hips and an ass just like women are supposed to! It's unfortunate that words like "curves" get misused by some, but I can tell you I'm  built like a WOMAN, and that includes curves!

xoxo,

Steph

-- Modified on 7/15/2014 11:05:42 PM

Girls have lines, women have CURVES. And you are all woman.

I'm built like a woman too!  
With a snatch and breasts!

Posted By: MatureGFE
unless four legged with fur counts! ;-) And I don't consider myself thin either, I have hips and an ass just like women are supposed to! It's unfortunate that words like "curves" get misused by some, but I can tell you I'm  built like a WOMAN, and that includes curves!

xoxo,

Steph

-- Modified on 7/15/2014 11:05:42 PM

Posted By: Panthera12
If the gentleman is having self esteem issues he can hit the gym and stop eating fast food. Same with the providers. We have too much of the PC bullshit in this country while too many people are overweight and that includes America's children. I may be crass, but what I say is true.  
   
 You and Julia are the hottest MILF's in the area. You are not keeping yourselves that way by eating mass quantities of processed and fast foods and laying around the house. Most people can be healthier and thinner by not being so lazy.    
...that I agree with this post .  Yeeesh, now everyone please don't hold it against me.

If you want to continue, see better reviewed ladies and keep working on your self esteem. Good Luck!!

He's not seeing GFE ladies he's seeing massage ladies. Most well reviewed GFE ladies will not discriminate on the weight issue as long as the gentleman can move about ok.

Steph xoxo

You are so much better with words than I. I hope he reads this. I wish he would see GFE ladies a few times, maybe that would help his self esteem .

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