TER General Board

carmen and hamlet is a bad analogy
BigPeterJohnson 39 Reviews 400 reads
posted

an opera or a play put on by different performers will be different, so it's not the same to say i've seen carmen 3 times which is the same as seeing the same girl 3 times.  marilyne horne's carmen would be different than anna antonacci's.  olivier's hamlet is different than mel gibson's (yes, gibson did a version of hamlet, on film...heavy emphasis on the incest).

so i'll just stil to the question of ladies: new vs. repeat...

i've seen many ladies more than once, only a few more than twice, and a handful several times.  what makes me come back?  well gosh, oddly enough each person has different qualities that attracts me back.  one lady i've seen a couple times a year for the last four years.  she's just an awesome person and she makes me feel like the biggest stud in the world, plus in her case, her dfk skills are the best i've had the pleasure of enjoying.

i think the question is not so much what makes me come back, as opposed to what makes me decide not to?  and that usually is when i catch the lady obviously being somewhere else mentally when she's with me.  sure, i know everyone spaces out now and then, but when the feeling that i'm an envelope more than a human becomes so great, well, adios senorita, there's plenty of fish in the sea.

one lady recently who gave me a dynamite first session gave me a rather half-hearted second session...didn't want to play the games i suggested, was pretty intent on just screwing which is not my forte to begin with, but worst of all in my mind...did not return my after-session thank you text, which all of my lady friends happily do (and this girl did on our first session).  so, as great as she was the first time, i don't need to see her again.  i would have forgiven her lackluster performance if she had just returned the thank you text.  i'm that much of a narcissist.

i see new women because (a) that's the great thing about the hobby and (b) variety is the spice of life.  and, like many others have expressed on this and other boards, there's nothing that beats the rush of walking up to a door behind which stands a brand new friend, full of sexy funtime possibilities.

what makes me want to come back?  if i feel that the girl actually made an effort to connect with me in a genuine way, and not just give me her usual routine.  there's one lady i'm seeing currently, about 4 or 5 times now, who has gone above and beyond the usual provider/client relationship and taken time to listen listen to my complaints about my current situation, and given me some heart felt advice (and otc, i might add).  aside from the fact that she had mad skillz, the fact that she tries to connect with me on a human level keeps me coming back.  there is another lady i am also seeing who does the same; mad skillz in the bedroom but also genuinely endeavors to connect as a human being.

when i feel that the lady enjoys my company beyond the envelope, that's when i come back.  and even if that enjoyment is some sort of super secret double reverse layer of provider deceit, as long as i feel that way, that's what counts.

and actually, gagambler, i do get paid by the word, but not here.  here i write for the fun of communicating.

OriginalMonger1486 reads

I request any insights or suggestions that could help me strike the best balance between seeing new providers and repeating with ones that I have already seen, and how to make the most out of repeats.

On one hand, the novelty and variety of seeing new providers is a key part of what I appreciate about this hobby. The magic of a first good session with a new provider plays a big role in my enjoyment of it, both at the time and for days afterward, as I savor the afterglow and the memory. The variety exposes me to a wide range of ethnic groups, ages, body types, personalities, and erotic skills, broadening my horizons and enabling me to enrich my life by discovering new pleasures that I might have otherwise missed.  

On the other hand, I recognize the practical advantages of repeating with a provider that I have already met. I know her firsthand and do not have to trust her reviewers. We will be more comfortable with each other, build rapport, and know each other's likes and limits. Some providers may offer incentives to repeat clients, like grandfathered rates or more menu items. If nothing else, repeats are more convenient, as booking them is easier than the time and effort it takes to find, research, and book new providers.  

I have identified three patterns in the quality of my repeat experiences.

1) In a minority of cases, their performance was not as good the second time, which I attributed to complacency on their part, i.e. they believed that they had already won me over as a regular and thus did not feel the need to work as hard. I did not repeat with them a third time.
2) In a majority of cases, their repeat performances were comparable in quality to the original sessions, but I did not feel the same psychological rush and afterglow that I had felt the first time, and my interest in them gradually faded with each subsequent repeat. I attribute my declining interest in them to the lack of novelty and do not believe that it reflected on them at all.  
3) In a minority of cases, I enjoyed the second time even more, which I attributed to either the bonding and mutual familiarity from our original sessions or the lengths of time that had passed since the original sessions. I have found that the second sessions are often better if they happen either: shortly after the first session (within a week or so), riding the momentum of the first session; or a long time after the first session (months or even years), which made it feel like a reunion. Even in these cases, however, the magic from that second session faded in later repeats and I gradually lost interest too.

With one exception, I have not seen any one provider more than five times in my eight years in this hobby. That one exception came at an earlier point in my pursuit of this hobby, when my access to providers was more limited. She was an unusually close fit for my tastes, and she was available so infrequently that it may have sustained my interest longer by limiting my access to her.  

I have similar patterns in two other, non-sexual hobbies of mine – travel and the performing arts, in which I try to have as many new and different experiences as possible. In other words, I try to avoid “been there, done that” experiences. For example, I have been to Paris and enjoyed seeing its wonderful  sights, such as the Louvre and the Eiffel Tower. I would probably have a good time if I went back, but why do that when there are so many other great places to visit that I have not already seen? I travel a lot but have chosen to revisit only two destinations: Spain and Las Vegas. The trips to Spain were 15 years apart and to different regions. My first trip to Spain knocked my socks off; my second trip was OK. My first trip to Las Vegas was OK; the second trip knocked my socks off because I knew it better and could make more of it; my third trip was great but did not feel as good.  

My favorite opera is Carmen, which I have seen three times. The first time, it knocked my socks off. The second time, I still enjoyed it but did not get the same rush. The third time, I was more interested in remembering the phenomenal blowjob that I had gotten from a new provider the previous night. I have also seen the play Hamlet three times -  the first time was enjoyable, the second time was incredible because I now had a better understanding of it, and the third time was just OK.  

Gentlemen -

How many times can you repeat before you begin to lose interest or the spark or magic fades? Does the length of time between sessions affect your interest in a provider? Do you have any other suggestions for keeping the spark alive or sustaining your interest over a greater number of repeats?

Ladies -

How do you keep the spark alive and keep things fresh and interesting for repeat clients?

I have three providers who I will see till I retire. Two of which are on these boards third doesn't advertise. It's not complacent as they are different ethnicities and shapes. These three ladies value me as a client and I know like me to a certain extent. The sex has only gotten better. I saw a new girl today new isn't always better.

GaGambler378 reads

Sometimes once is more than enough, other times I have seen the same provider literally hundreds of times over a several year period and everything in between.

My advice is to do what I do, which is to do whatever you feel is right for you at the time. There really is no need to put that much thought, or that many words into your decision making process. Just have fun and do what feels natural.

hotplants284 reads

you already did...lol. Wow, so much over-analysis. One day at a time, and all that....

Posted By: GaGambler
Sometimes once is more than enough, other times I have seen the same provider literally hundreds of times over a several year period and everything in between.  
   
 My advice is to do what I do, which is to do whatever you feel is right for you at the time. There really is no need to put that much thought, or that many words into your decision making process. Just have fun and do what feels natural.

LasVegan232 reads

been contacted?  That has got to be the longest post..........I have ever read...........ANYWHERE!

Which is also rare.
There is a few over 3....

That said, I believe the lady I saw today was 4. (in as many weeks) LOL
and oh btw there will be many more with her i hope. .

to answer her question for you, She always tweeks our dates just a bit.
Today was in front of mirrors!  

Most are once. To Gamblers point, its whatever you want.

OriginalMonger260 reads

I usually stop at 3 sessions too. I will rarely go for as many as 4 or 5 sessions.

Do you find that you have usually lost interest by that point? Is that why you usually stop at 3, or is it for some other reason?

OriginalMonger237 reads

...you mentioned trying new things during a repeat session, e.g. the use of mirrors. I have found that trying new things or menu items does keep the spark alive a bit longer but does not change the overall trajectory, i.e. my gradual loss of interest. What has your experience been in that regard?

-- Modified on 1/27/2016 10:38:34 PM

Posted By: OriginalMonger
I request any insights or suggestions that could help me strike the best balance between seeing new providers and repeating with ones that I have already seen, and how to make the most out of repeats.  
   
 On one hand, the novelty and variety of seeing new providers is a key part of what I appreciate about this hobby. The magic of a first good session with a new provider plays a big role in my enjoyment of it, both at the time and for days afterward, as I savor the afterglow and the memory. The variety exposes me to a wide range of ethnic groups, ages, body types, personalities, and erotic skills, broadening my horizons and enabling me to enrich my life by discovering new pleasures that I might have otherwise missed.  
   
 On the other hand, I recognize the practical advantages of repeating with a provider that I have already met. I know her firsthand and do not have to trust her reviewers. We will be more comfortable with each other, build rapport, and know each other's likes and limits. Some providers may offer incentives to repeat clients, like grandfathered rates or more menu items. If nothing else, repeats are more convenient, as booking them is easier than the time and effort it takes to find, research, and book new providers.  
   
 I have identified three patterns in the quality of my repeat experiences.  
   
 1) In a minority of cases, their performance was not as good the second time, which I attributed to complacency on their part, i.e. they believed that they had already won me over as a regular and thus did not feel the need to work as hard. I did not repeat with them a third time.  
 2) In a majority of cases, their repeat performances were comparable in quality to the original sessions, but I did not feel the same psychological rush and afterglow that I had felt the first time, and my interest in them gradually faded with each subsequent repeat. I attribute my declining interest in them to the lack of novelty and do not believe that it reflected on them at all.  
 3) In a minority of cases, I enjoyed the second time even more, which I attributed to either the bonding and mutual familiarity from our original sessions or the lengths of time that had passed since the original sessions. I have found that the second sessions are often better if they happen either: shortly after the first session (within a week or so), riding the momentum of the first session; or a long time after the first session (months or even years), which made it feel like a reunion. Even in these cases, however, the magic from that second session faded in later repeats and I gradually lost interest too.  
   
 With one exception, I have not seen any one provider more than five times in my eight years in this hobby. That one exception came at an earlier point in my pursuit of this hobby, when my access to providers was more limited. She was an unusually close fit for my tastes, and she was available so infrequently that it may have sustained my interest longer by limiting my access to her.  
   
 I have similar patterns in two other, non-sexual hobbies of mine – travel and the performing arts, in which I try to have as many new and different experiences as possible. In other words, I try to avoid “been there, done that” experiences. For example, I have been to Paris and enjoyed seeing its wonderful  sights, such as the Louvre and the Eiffel Tower. I would probably have a good time if I went back, but why do that when there are so many other great places to visit that I have not already seen? I travel a lot but have chosen to revisit only two destinations: Spain and Las Vegas. The trips to Spain were 15 years apart and to different regions. My first trip to Spain knocked my socks off; my second trip was OK. My first trip to Las Vegas was OK; the second trip knocked my socks off because I knew it better and could make more of it; my third trip was great but did not feel as good.  
   
 My favorite opera is Carmen, which I have seen three times. The first time, it knocked my socks off. The second time, I still enjoyed it but did not get the same rush. The third time, I was more interested in remembering the phenomenal blowjob that I had gotten from a new provider the previous night. I have also seen the play Hamlet three times -  the first time was enjoyable, the second time was incredible because I now had a better understanding of it, and the third time was just OK.  
   
 Gentlemen -  
   
 How many times can you repeat before you begin to lose interest or the spark or magic fades? Does the length of time between sessions affect your interest in a provider? Do you have any other suggestions for keeping the spark alive or sustaining your interest over a greater number of repeats?  
   
 Ladies -  
   
 How do you keep the spark alive and keep things fresh and interesting for repeat clients?
-- Modified on 1/27/2016 5:30:42 PM

I know what works for me and what doesn't. I'm rotating between two ladies who happen to be roommates. Every now and again, we're good for a three some.

To keep things in perspective, I'll search for another lady to meet just break things up.  

I'll repeat a number of times until things seem to become mechanical. Then I'm done and will move on.

an opera or a play put on by different performers will be different, so it's not the same to say i've seen carmen 3 times which is the same as seeing the same girl 3 times.  marilyne horne's carmen would be different than anna antonacci's.  olivier's hamlet is different than mel gibson's (yes, gibson did a version of hamlet, on film...heavy emphasis on the incest).

so i'll just stil to the question of ladies: new vs. repeat...

i've seen many ladies more than once, only a few more than twice, and a handful several times.  what makes me come back?  well gosh, oddly enough each person has different qualities that attracts me back.  one lady i've seen a couple times a year for the last four years.  she's just an awesome person and she makes me feel like the biggest stud in the world, plus in her case, her dfk skills are the best i've had the pleasure of enjoying.

i think the question is not so much what makes me come back, as opposed to what makes me decide not to?  and that usually is when i catch the lady obviously being somewhere else mentally when she's with me.  sure, i know everyone spaces out now and then, but when the feeling that i'm an envelope more than a human becomes so great, well, adios senorita, there's plenty of fish in the sea.

one lady recently who gave me a dynamite first session gave me a rather half-hearted second session...didn't want to play the games i suggested, was pretty intent on just screwing which is not my forte to begin with, but worst of all in my mind...did not return my after-session thank you text, which all of my lady friends happily do (and this girl did on our first session).  so, as great as she was the first time, i don't need to see her again.  i would have forgiven her lackluster performance if she had just returned the thank you text.  i'm that much of a narcissist.

i see new women because (a) that's the great thing about the hobby and (b) variety is the spice of life.  and, like many others have expressed on this and other boards, there's nothing that beats the rush of walking up to a door behind which stands a brand new friend, full of sexy funtime possibilities.

what makes me want to come back?  if i feel that the girl actually made an effort to connect with me in a genuine way, and not just give me her usual routine.  there's one lady i'm seeing currently, about 4 or 5 times now, who has gone above and beyond the usual provider/client relationship and taken time to listen listen to my complaints about my current situation, and given me some heart felt advice (and otc, i might add).  aside from the fact that she had mad skillz, the fact that she tries to connect with me on a human level keeps me coming back.  there is another lady i am also seeing who does the same; mad skillz in the bedroom but also genuinely endeavors to connect as a human being.

when i feel that the lady enjoys my company beyond the envelope, that's when i come back.  and even if that enjoyment is some sort of super secret double reverse layer of provider deceit, as long as i feel that way, that's what counts.

and actually, gagambler, i do get paid by the word, but not here.  here i write for the fun of communicating.

GaGambler317 reads

and why is it always the BSU's that seem to get paid by the word, while the assholes like me get paid by the post?

For me. I am overly nervous meeting new providers. compounded by the effect I have ed and performance anxiety. I prefer repeats. Of the few I repeat with locally, one is outstanding at remembering what worked before and incorporating that in subsequent sessions. One, I am very comfortable with and we text/chat/email frequently. I take her out to OTC lunch. I listen to her issues and try to give sage advice on her business processes. The third is mature and beautiful, but I had thought only did HJ BR, until I read a review someone had recently written and questioned her; the review stated the facts but that experience from her was above my break point.

If I travel I will check out others that have piqued my interest.

above average chemistry between us (real or imagined) as well as a connection between the sheets. As any veteran hobbyist can attest, some providers are more skilled than others. Sometimes I don't get to repeat until over a year has passed between visits but I repeat when I can with a lady who has "rocked my world".

I don't think you can ever keep a spark like in the beginning, and I'd say it's pretty unrealistic to think you can in any kind of relationship...  but that spark can light one hell of a fuse that can be a hell of a ride as it burns its way down.  And yes, I know these aren't relationships per se, but the question was about repeating and looking for a little more than the basics which of course work for many here  

So digging a little deeper into what others come here for too, as for me I can repeat every day with one woman I know as she's genuine, and a pretty damn good soul, and also likes to turn off the meter and just stay the night more often than not because we genuinely like each other's company.  We don't have a whole lot of common experiences or interests but have what each other wants at the core and it feels great when we're together - simple as that.  

So my advice if you are looking for a repeat situation is to find one where the feeling is mutual; she may not be the hottest, the sexiest, or the youngest -- but if she wants to be with you as much as you want to be with her within the somewhat elastic boundaries of p4p, you won't have to ask any of the questions you asked, because you'll have all the answers you want - and you'll be too busy thinking about the next time.



-- Modified on 1/27/2016 9:19:30 PM

..you need to figure this shit out for yourself. It isn't difficult. Asking a ragtag of mongers for their advice isn't really going to help you as evidenced by the fact that you have already laid out all the scenerios in deep detail. Pattern 1. Pattern 2. Pattern 3. Jeeez.

One thing I have learned over time, is that I can't promise anyone a growing experience. Because I can't change another person's perspective on what they appreciate.

This is why I try to seek out people who know how to find a hidden gem. Before they meet me, I am a hidden gem within an ad site. Or a post. Or whatever. They they click on my website, and BAM - they found the information they needed to make a full decision.

They then have to put up a bit of a struggle to get to me, just to build up that manly testosterone. They get thrown back a few times, and it gets more exciting to achieve the reward.

Lots of guys here worry about the fact that paying for pussy is so easy, so they don't give themselves any credit at all for getting what they want. But I like to give them that little bit of a course to run to get through to me, and they have to dig and search for clues, explore, and court with my site before we meet.

IDK - some guys love it, so it's fun.

That first appointment actually can feel amazing, or just ok. It's very hard for some people to fully let go when they're nervous, which is why I think they come back.

There's a little test in the beginning for some, because it brings the curious out of some people, which means they'll be curious for the future.

The word "performance" can cause some trouble. If you're waiting for this woman to break out of her shell, but at the same time asking her to put on a circus, (women - and especially experienced women can read that even if you don't say it,) it can deactivate the surrender part.

If you're looking for a machine that can do magic tricks, that's what you're going to get. If you're looking to let go of your checklist, and wait over time for little gems to pop up and burst, then you have to be willing to expect nothing, and not look for anything specific.

I've been to Chicago day in and day out, (I live in that area,) and I still get excited to go there.  

I think sometimes you can learn too much from other people, and definitely too much from your experiences. Perhaps the fact that you're thinking about this and putting this together, is a sign that what you really need is not a direct answer, but a need to figure out how to find treasures in the mundane.  

You seem to want to find new experiences, but don't know how to find new things within the same experiences. Kinda' like science. You look in a single organism, and as you look closer and closer, you get to the atomic level, and you can make nuclear warfare with it.

Everything you come across is amazing, you just have to be willing to find out how to see why. It takes practice, but it takes a while to see amazing results.

But nowadays I've dived in fully after dealing with some wrestling with guilt.  

And I think I am on date #10 this Friday with one since July, others, a couple of years, I'm on the 6th with some in short periods of time, and most of the longer terms like to take me on vaycays. Try doing that over and over again lol!

There was a point where I couldn't listen to one dude even breathe on the 5th date. I was ready to puke. But the next date, I was like "Oh god I'm gonna' puke" when I started to hear him breathe... then I stopped, and realized - it changed. I like hearing his breathing when I wasn't looking his way, because I knew he was there with me. At that point, I started to like it. Those little vulnerabilities can actually be exciting, sexy, and erotic.

IDK, after a few dates, something opens up and it can actually get pretty erotic. Kind of like an office romance. Huge fantasy. Not everyone is going to feel the same way, but after a while, I may just start shoving stuff up a guy's butt as an added bonus for being so faithful to me after that bubble busts around the 5th date. Obviously if he asks too, lol.

:)


-- Modified on 1/27/2016 9:27:20 PM

OriginalMonger257 reads

Interesting points. So, if I understood you correctly, you used to limit clients to three sessions? Was the purpose of that rule to avoid developing an emotional attachment to them, or did they or the repetition start to bore or annoy you (e.g. like the breathing guy)? If you don't mind me asking, what guilt made you change that rule?

Are you going to start randomly shoving remote controls and other stuff up my ass?   If you do, please make sure that I am properly lubed, OK?

I mean unless you ask me to... We'd have to start thinking up some code words ;)

Like, "Fuck me!" Oh, I'm so confused ... Now where did I put that remote...??😎

Posted By: Courtney.Ova
I mean unless you ask me to... We'd have to start thinking up some code words ;)

OriginalMonger242 reads

So is the purpose of that rule of yours to avoid developing too much of an emotional attachment to her? Or, like me, do you usually start to lose interest by that point?

For a majority of us p4p comes to a end a some point for one reason or another. it's hard enough thinking you will never see or talk to someone again that you have forged a friendship with in the cive world. I do not need the pain of that in this one.

I thought the point was to hobby with ladies that wouldn't "date" you in real life?

Posted By: hammerhead896
For a majority of us p4p comes to a end a some point for one reason or another. it's hard enough thinking you will never see or talk to someone again that you have forged a friendship with in the cive world. I do not need the pain of that in this one.

OriginalMonger228 reads

You raised an important point that I had considered including in my original post. I have found that trying new things (e.g. menu items, positions, toys) with the same provider in repeat sessions can keep the spark alive and sustain my interest a bit longer.  At the same time, though, it does not change the overall trajectory of my gradually declining interest, and there are only a finite number of new things that both of us would be willing to try.

When you look for an experience with a provider, what do you look for? Are you looking for new places to put your cock, or are you looking for psychams? (Those really thrilling and chilling orgasms of the mind, where you think back and get chills all week, or just melt.)

How long do you usually spend with a provider?

And do you want to feel passionate and emotionally close to her, or just physical?

Same with the new places you visit. Spain - I imagine there are tons of new things to see and experience there.

Skyfyre266 reads

The short and easy answer is to do like I do: BOTH. That's the beauty of hobbying on the cheap: you can repeat with your favorite on a regular interval while still occasionally audition new and fresh talent.

My criteria to choose who to repeat is simple:

She has to knock my socks off, rock my world and exceed my expectation in term of look, personality, service and menu.

I've been seeing my current regular almost once a week for over a year now. It's became more like a SD/SB or FWB relationship.  

PS: yet another benefit of hobbying on the cheap is that you can afford to try out many, many to find the true gem. Henceforth lies the great secret of life: QUANTITY BEGETS QUALITY! Or, to put it another way: throw enough of them into the wall and one is bound to stick, LOL.

OriginalMonger240 reads

That's exactly what I do. I prefer to try as many new girls as possible and then repeat with the ones that I liked the most whenever I cannot find a new girl in time for when I need to fuck again.

The problem is that, after I repeat with those girls, I start to lose interest in them, even though I know that they are gems and keepers. In other words, to extend your metaphor, they stick to the wall at first, but then they start to fall off of the wall, usually through no fault of my their own but rather due to my male tendency to "hit it and quit it."

I have enjoyed my time with many ladies, some of whom I would love to, and fully expect to, repeat with. However, there are also many ladies I would love to experience.  Unfortunately my hobbying time is precious and limited.  

I've met a number of ladies I could easily see over and over and never get 'bored' and others I've yearned for for years...  I am not looking for a part time lover I'm looking for a lady to spend some time with for creative and uninhibited sex.  Yes chemistry is important but when you adore women as I do I feel  that comes easy...  

My wish list isn't long and I'm sure I will circle back with some of my favorites.  To some extent it is a matter of being in the right place at the right time

things other than sex acts. In order to keep something alive, the situation for me, has to be multidimensional. If it is all about sex acts, well that will get old by date three and I am more than likely to bolt. I just am not a fan of feeling like a warm masturbation fuck doll. Nothing against guys that want that or ladies that provide that, it is just not for me.

I have never felt the need to expand my menu to keep guys. If they stay, they stay and I am grateful for their patronage.  

I have been seeing a couple of guys for literally years at once a week. If there was not more involved or to talk about, then I am afraid I would have run out of sex shit years ago.

How many times can you repeat before you begin to lose interest or the spark or magic fades? Does the length of time between sessions affect your interest in a provider? Do you have any other suggestions for keeping the spark alive or sustaining your interest over a greater number of repeats?

I meet this girl four times before I stop seeing her. Because the last time was the not a good session. The first one was awesome, the second was good, the third one was just ok. I started to see a pattern here. I figure that she was not into me so I stop seeing her. I was not going to pay her a fifth time and have a real bad session with her.

i think you hit something when you talk about length of time between visits.  one of my atfs i've seen for over 4 years.  but, with exception of one week a couple years ago when she filled in at the last second for a date that didn't work out for me, it's usually 5-6 months minimum between visits.  but whenever i see her, she treats me like her long lost lover, and that keeps me coming back.

this other girl i've seen 5 times in the last 3 months, and the excitement is starting to wear thin.  but who knows?

to me with whom I am most compatible. I don't want to just have sex. I want to have an adventure, and I want to build an ongoing relationship. Hence, I have mostly regular friends, with occasional new friends who come along.  

What keeps them returning? We truly like each other- even love each other- and enjoy being in each other's company. We've forged a connection that involves deep caring and great mutual respect. There's undeniable chemistry (I sometimes even get wet upon seeing their name in my inbox) which grows over time. We usually have a few things in common, and passion is always one of them (I'm passionate about many things, and they will usually share my passion for something, like food, travel, culture, opera, books, etc.). We try new things together. Sometimes, it really is purely animal lust (and that's hot too).

Most of all, I think those with whom I have met the most often see me as an equal, and not as a service provider. We're friends. That's so important in my style of companionship. I don't want a million different guys in and out of my life. I want ongoing friendships which benefit the both of us.

I'll agree with someone who posted above about not really being able to compare the performing arts to this, unless in your examples you saw the same cast perform the same opera or play. I've seen La Traviata a few times now, and each is unique and wonderful in its own way. But I haven't seen the same performers do it (I've seen it on three continents).

i'd like to think (though i sincerely doubt) that most providers operate that way.

And the second session is better than the first ( more aren't )
 I'll repeat more than 4 or 5 times because the provider has convinced me that she LOVES me.  
I know it's an act, but I'll take it!😎😎

WildJimmy!235 reads

Or do you set up the first contact thinking it will just be a one-time thing?

That might make a difference on how things go.

I can't explain it really..  The last girl I saw is someone that always turns me on..when I got there, it was the first time I had seen her in about 8 months. Before then, I had seen her 3 times.. She said.. No kidding, when you texted me I was thrilled. I had been thinking a lot about you and was wondering what had happened to you and where you had gone. We had a terrific session.. Men are egotistical creatures.. we need to know that we are unique and appreciated..  Others I see seem to be going through the motions.. as I consider your question. That seems to be the biggest thing for me.. If a girl seems "real".. and genuine.. and is enjoying it.. I enjoy it a lot more.

I saw one very accomplished provider who was very "real".. I think I saw her at least 6 times ( I really have no idea).. but she seemed to be more into talking than screwing.. and that ended up turning me off.. No way to figure out what works.. I saw a well reviewed girl last summer and that day.. at that time.. she was dry as the Sahara.. just getting the job done.. That was it for me and I had seen her 3 times before..  

I asked one girl if she was used up for the day by the time I saw her at about 4 PM. She said no, I was only the second that day.. and it was a very great session.. so real + enthusiasm and mutual enjoyment gets it done for me..

While novelty has its attractions, there is more to be said for knowing you're going to be happy with someone.

Generally the longer I see someone who is really good, the better the relationship gets.

First times are always awkward, whether there's any chemistry or not.  Repeats are like relationships: you know each other better, which makes for more intimacy.  Unlike a marriage, however, you're only seeing each other "on the clock," so you're less likely to get on each others nerves or have fights.  

There is such a thing as repeating too much.  My ATF has a client who hires her EVERY DAY for multiple hours.  That's why I like to keep a couple ladies in rotation, you don't want to start pretending it's a damn marriage.

Sometimes its difficult to make a date with some providers, especially those who tour.  I find however that I tend to repeat if there are several factors that align.  First and foremost, did.we have fun the first time, the second, the third?  If the answer is yes, then I will probably continue to see that provider sporadically until we dont have a good time.  
The second factor for repeats is availablity.  If I have the time and she's available without a lot of hassle or travel or expense (above her fee), its a plus mark for a repeat.
The last factors for a repeat is personality and service, is this person fun to talk to and hang out with as well as being a great provider of sexual experiences?  If yes, the repeats.will be in our future
  However, it is nice to stretch the envelope and see someone new once in a while, so I have to say that right now there.are probably 3 sporadic repeaters I see and every 3 or 4 months a newbie.

I like the feeling or rush I get when meeting a provider for the first time.  Things are not as comfortable but it usually ends the same and I am usually leaving satisfied.  I have only met a few providers that I would repeat with.  2 of them are no longer in the business.  The third is the one I am currently seeing now.  I have just hit the 5 time mark.  Each time I have seen her, the sessions are better then before.  She is through and agency which makes things easier because we do not communicate unless I come by.  If we had our phone numbers..  I feel that seeing her would be more often.  She has been giving me more perks then anyone she is seeing that's Forsure.  Very happy to find my atf.

I Repeatttttt :p

See me, ohh yea.

Repeat again and again.

Anyway.....

Now Listen Up!

Sit Down,

Relax,

Shut The Fuck Up,

Just Look Pretty For Me,

AND  

'Put Youir COck In My Mouth! :D

 
Any Questions? I didn't think so... :D

 
I REpeatttttt!

 

hahaha

 
Love & Light,

Mary Magdalen

to find one regular local girl to supplement my ATF that lives a bit away.  Once I find that special lady, I find the ease of appt, knowing what to expect, she knows what to expect and it really is a good experience.  As I've posted ad nauseum on the boards, I'm in a bit of a dry spot, with very little talent in my area and each new girl just adds to the anxiety.

Posted By: OriginalMonger
I request any insights or suggestions that could help me strike the best balance between seeing new providers and repeating with ones that I have already seen, and how to make the most out of repeats.  
   
 On one hand, the novelty and variety of seeing new providers is a key part of what I appreciate about this hobby. The magic of a first good session with a new provider plays a big role in my enjoyment of it, both at the time and for days afterward, as I savor the afterglow and the memory. The variety exposes me to a wide range of ethnic groups, ages, body types, personalities, and erotic skills, broadening my horizons and enabling me to enrich my life by discovering new pleasures that I might have otherwise missed.  
   
 On the other hand, I recognize the practical advantages of repeating with a provider that I have already met. I know her firsthand and do not have to trust her reviewers. We will be more comfortable with each other, build rapport, and know each other's likes and limits. Some providers may offer incentives to repeat clients, like grandfathered rates or more menu items. If nothing else, repeats are more convenient, as booking them is easier than the time and effort it takes to find, research, and book new providers.  
   
 I have identified three patterns in the quality of my repeat experiences.  
   
 1) In a minority of cases, their performance was not as good the second time, which I attributed to complacency on their part, i.e. they believed that they had already won me over as a regular and thus did not feel the need to work as hard. I did not repeat with them a third time.  
 2) In a majority of cases, their repeat performances were comparable in quality to the original sessions, but I did not feel the same psychological rush and afterglow that I had felt the first time, and my interest in them gradually faded with each subsequent repeat. I attribute my declining interest in them to the lack of novelty and do not believe that it reflected on them at all.  
 3) In a minority of cases, I enjoyed the second time even more, which I attributed to either the bonding and mutual familiarity from our original sessions or the lengths of time that had passed since the original sessions. I have found that the second sessions are often better if they happen either: shortly after the first session (within a week or so), riding the momentum of the first session; or a long time after the first session (months or even years), which made it feel like a reunion. Even in these cases, however, the magic from that second session faded in later repeats and I gradually lost interest too.  
   
 With one exception, I have not seen any one provider more than five times in my eight years in this hobby. That one exception came at an earlier point in my pursuit of this hobby, when my access to providers was more limited. She was an unusually close fit for my tastes, and she was available so infrequently that it may have sustained my interest longer by limiting my access to her.  
   
 I have similar patterns in two other, non-sexual hobbies of mine – travel and the performing arts, in which I try to have as many new and different experiences as possible. In other words, I try to avoid “been there, done that” experiences. For example, I have been to Paris and enjoyed seeing its wonderful  sights, such as the Louvre and the Eiffel Tower. I would probably have a good time if I went back, but why do that when there are so many other great places to visit that I have not already seen? I travel a lot but have chosen to revisit only two destinations: Spain and Las Vegas. The trips to Spain were 15 years apart and to different regions. My first trip to Spain knocked my socks off; my second trip was OK. My first trip to Las Vegas was OK; the second trip knocked my socks off because I knew it better and could make more of it; my third trip was great but did not feel as good.  
   
 My favorite opera is Carmen, which I have seen three times. The first time, it knocked my socks off. The second time, I still enjoyed it but did not get the same rush. The third time, I was more interested in remembering the phenomenal blowjob that I had gotten from a new provider the previous night. I have also seen the play Hamlet three times -  the first time was enjoyable, the second time was incredible because I now had a better understanding of it, and the third time was just OK.  
   
 Gentlemen -  
   
 How many times can you repeat before you begin to lose interest or the spark or magic fades? Does the length of time between sessions affect your interest in a provider? Do you have any other suggestions for keeping the spark alive or sustaining your interest over a greater number of repeats?  
   
 Ladies -  
   
 How do you keep the spark alive and keep things fresh and interesting for repeat clients?

Jacking up the rate and not grandfathering.

Developing a shitty attitude on social media acting like you are better other providers and your old clients is another.

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