to have picked up one of the more serious STDs than a guy who engages in covered relations with a transgender woman.
(I'm sobered by the information posted by BigPapasan, but don't we need to take into account what kind of protection is used in what kind of acts?) BUT I recall a discussion a while back on one of these boards, maybe Newbie board, in which there seemed to be a consensus that many cisgender providers do discriminate against guys who also see transgender due to the PERCEPTION, regardless of factual accuracy, that those guys are higher risk for STD. So that would seem to be the dilemma for guys who enjoy a wider spectrum of sexuality. I wonder if the more main stream providers also discriminate against guys who engage in BDSM. Have you ever watched some of the more hard core video's? Talk about serious exchange of fluids. Plus, regardless of how safely YOU play, if you climb any of the monkey bars in our playground you don't know who and how many other kids have sweated and strained in those same spots. As for me, I try to play safe and get tested regularly, and I think all the other kids in our playground are just dandy as long as they smile and play niceThis week I got three gentlemen I declined due to screening, they would screen with me using non verified ladies and when I ask for a reference that has a better online reputation they say I can't tell you because I'm scared I say why and in return they admitted they do not want to give the refs because it's a TS lady and worried about how female providers would take it since I'm a female they rather not screen using a TS and didn't have other ladies as refs to use. After hearing there side of the story. I could careless why thry couldn't screen I still had to cancel because they didn't want to screen. I take no chances and I don't half screen, if the person doesn't give info I just can't
Never had this happen something new, never had people afraid to screen based on someone judging them.
I posted this topic to GD because maybe someone out there is experiencing this hobbyist or provider.
-- Modified on 10/31/2015 9:58:17 PM
My latest reject customer: "I don't want my regular girl to know I want to see a ts"... Ugh. Makes me shed a tear every time.
Never had this happen something new, never had people afraid to screen based on someone judging them.
I posted this topic to GD because maybe someone out there is experiencing this hobbyist or provider.
-- Modified on 10/31/2015 9:58:17 PM
Honestly we are in the business of non judgement, this shouldn't be an issue. I've had gentleman give references that were either very different or offered services I do not, as long as they are reputable providers who screen well it should make no difference.
When AIDS was a "homosexual and Haitian disease" bisexual men were considered high risk. First of all the The 3 TS ladies I have met in my long life, including you my charming Sasha, are as careful and responsible as the other providers. When AIDS was a gay disease it was during the peak of irresponsible gay sex. One patient of mine in the late 1970s had had 40 or 50 "contacts unprotected" on a week end trip to NY. Those days are gone and I have never met a TS who behaved like that. I also don't think clients of feminine lovely TS providers fit into the gay group that was at on time a repository of AIDs and other diseases..
I must also say, you are one of the most charming people --what ever gender-- I have ever had the pleasure of meeting
Specially the part where you said I'm one of the most charming chicks around 😋️
I don't question you, I question their BS TS excuses for not providing proper references.
If they were telling you the truth, they had good reason to be reluctant to tell you they saw a TS - many providers don't want to see hobbyists who have seen a TS. And providers also have a good reason for being reluctant to see hobbyists who also see transgenders - transgender women are at high risk for HIV infection. That's a fact:
http://www.cdc.gov/hiv/group/gender/transgender/
One study showed that transgender women were 49 times more likely to have HIV:
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/04/02/transgender-women-49-times-likely-hiv-study_n_3000094.html
No one knows more about safe sex than providers. Their health and livelihood is on the line every day. If they don't want to see hobbyists because of their sexual history, they're not doing it on a whim.
TS providers are just as concerned about their health. Perhaps providers shouldn't judge hobbyists who have seen a TS and perhaps hobbyists shouldn't judge providers who have been reviewed by hobbyists who have seen transgender women. But there are those statistics...
-- Modified on 10/31/2015 11:24:54 PM
I don't question the validity of this study, but what this study is not telling you is is all those people were escorts. To assume that because someone saw a ts then he's likely to be sick and should be avoided is simply BS and pure ignorance. Safe sex is safe sex. And just because I'm a ts doesn automatically make me prone to catch anything more than it makes a female provider. I think the study implies that transgender people may be prone to engage in unprotected sex more often. That may be true, or it may not. All I can do is practice safe sex following the industry standard.
In my personal opinion there's guys who won't give out a ts info as reference for fear to be perceived as gay (which is bullshit). And guys who know for a fact that the girl who they wanna see is a transphobic provider (which is also bs). But one thing is for sure. They don't give out ts references NOT because of your little study you just quoted, but because of social stigma.
Fin 😝️
-- Modified on 11/1/2015 8:38:35 AM
Hobbyists and escorts both at risk in this business.Hobbyists and escorts should be helping each others with screening process.Blacklist hobbyists and escorts not references friendly.Please be helpful screening process.Thank you Fancy
-- Modified on 11/1/2015 2:17:06 AM
Blacklist? There's that misused word again ... Did you mean "don't see" instead?
-- Modified on 11/1/2015 2:17:06 AM
-- Modified on 11/1/2015 2:17:06 AM
I don't think it deserves a blacklist. I am reference friendly but if the lady isn't reference friendly it's a free country that's her right, snd if the hobbyist doesn't want to give a correct ref then I kust don't see him. I would save a blacklist for a more harmful situation.
to have picked up one of the more serious STDs than a guy who engages in covered relations with a transgender woman.
(I'm sobered by the information posted by BigPapasan, but don't we need to take into account what kind of protection is used in what kind of acts?)
BUT I recall a discussion a while back on one of these boards, maybe Newbie board, in which there seemed to be a consensus that many cisgender providers do discriminate against guys who also see transgender due to the PERCEPTION, regardless of factual accuracy, that those guys are higher risk for STD. So that would seem to be the dilemma for guys who enjoy a wider spectrum of sexuality.
I wonder if the more main stream providers also discriminate against guys who engage in BDSM. Have you ever watched some of the more hard core video's? Talk about serious exchange of fluids.
Plus, regardless of how safely YOU play, if you climb any of the monkey bars in our playground you don't know who and how many other kids have sweated and strained in those same spots.
As for me, I try to play safe and get tested regularly, and I think all the other kids in our playground are just dandy as long as they smile and play nice
am I going to have to take you out behind the woodshed and wash our your PC mouth with a bar of soap yet AGAIN???!!!
seem like a smart guy and a libertarian to boot. 
OK, I had to go back and reread what you actually wrote and by and large yes I do agree with the substance of your post, even if most of it was written in PCSpeak.
One thing I don't have any hard evidence to back my thoughts with, but I am sure most here will agree, is that just like regular non TS hookers (or as the fucktarded PC police would say "cisgendered") or as I would call them "real women", hookers in general practice safe sex at a higher rate than women in the general population, I would tend to believe the same thing applies to TS providers, making them in general safer sexual partners than a typical TS who is not a hooker.
It's all a crap shoot though, You can see only sexual partner in a year, but if that person has fucked ten thousand other people, from a risk standpoint, so have you.
First let me say, sorry sasha you are experiencing this in the community, it shouldn't happen.
I would also like to say passing judgement on others is just wrong.
This business should be a no judgment zone but I see it isn't. I think a provider has a right to decline to see a hobbyist for whatever reason she likes. It could be because he's to young, to old, to tall, or because he sees a TS. I may not agree with it because I do think as long as someone iscreened properly it shouldn't matter but I also understand providers have there reason. The problem is not who they will see and who they wouldn't see. The problem is judging others to the point where you have a guy scared to use a ref.
Whatever choice the hobbyist or provider chooses to make it's thiers but it should remain a judge free zone. All the provider has to do is say I do not think we are a good match instead of saying listen you saw a ts I can't do this and then possibly making the guy feel feel bad and worry if she will tell others he's a bad person.
Looking on here I see guys all the time saying no white girls or no black girls or no mature girls, ok that's fine however don't back channel other hobbyist and bash them about who they see and how high they rated a girl that you think isn't beautiful. Beauty is something that varies with each person.
The main point of my typing this is to say
Keep the hobby fun , safe and entertaining, leave the judging out the window.
-- Modified on 11/1/2015 9:24:14 AM
I've never declined an appointment because someone used a TS provider as a reference, because no one ever has... but I have stopped seeing clients based on their telling me that they've been with a trans-woman. I've also refused future meetings with clients that have revealed that they've been with men. The thought of both just makes me uncomfortable. It's hypocritical of me, I am openly bisexual.
I am turned off (sexually) by men who are sexually attracted to men or to the penises of trans-women. It's just mental for me, and I think it's unfair to me and probably silly.. I've stopped seeing a few guys whose company I really enjoyed because of this issue.
I also assume that they are a higher std/sti risk.. I would not give a bbbj (or any other uncovered services) to a client that used a TS as a reference, even if I was willing to see him.
-- Modified on 11/1/2015 9:43:24 AM
at least you are a LOT more honest about your biases than are the women with NBA policies.
I don't think even a "lowly hooker" should feel obligated to have sex with ANYONE they don't feel comfortable with.
Look at the choices you have, you can either suck it up and have a very unsatisfying session for both of you, you bet a guy can tell when you are truly "Not into it" and pulling away from him at every opportunity, or you can simply do as you do and don't see guys you don't feel comfortable with.
I have seen a lot of women in my life, OK I have seen a LOT of women in my life and just like johns, some hookers think that "high volume" guys are higher risk or unclean. If I a woman doesn't want to see me because I see too many women, I get it and I don't hold a grudge. You are free to see who you want to see and only who you want to see IMO>
being more honest about her reasons doesn't justify ignorance. If shes turned off by the client's sexual preferences. that is a valid argument. Probably a poor business decision, yet a valid reason. You are also right, that it's her right to decide who she sees. Inadvertently she is also perpetuating the social stigma I have to go thru. The world isn't gonna change overnight I get that. I myself have a hard time seeing people that may be overly effeminate because I prefer guys that are a bit more masculine. But not judging others, and be all inclusive is important to me. As long as everything is safe and fun.
Sorry if I sound like I wanna impose my views or make people accept me. I really don't care one way or the other, because not everyone will agree or understand, or accept it. I just think its important that people understand that i'm not any more prone to stds that a cisgender woman just because Im trans. That's just the most ignorant thing i have ever heard.
Us trans girls get the same clients you guys get, the same gentlemen ones and the same douchy ones. Explain to me how im more prone to stds than you? my condoms aren't more breakable than yours. I hate when people just quote articles.
I would recommend her to have a transexual girl for a friend. That will clear a lot of her "assumptions" about the community. that is all i will say about the subject. im sorry
and you have done a great job so far in doing just that by using humor to diffuse hostility.
and her reasons are her reasons, she really doesn't have to justify who she will let in between her legs, even if the reasons are due to ignorance. This isn't a bakery or a coffee shop where everyone has the "right" to be served. No one has the "right" to have sex with anyone, paid for or not, bigotry involved or not.
I will also disagree that having a transsexual for a friend will open her eyes about the "community" it will only open her eyes where it comes to that one person, but it is a start. I have had a couple of TS friends over the years, but I don't think I have ever learned anything about any kind of "community" It wasn't anything I was seeking I just had a GF whose best friend was a person going through the process. I just accepted "him" as one of the girls, but it was always a surprise whether he would show up as a he or a she. I have to confess he made a better woman than a man. He never seemed himself as a man and looked much more comfortable as a woman. I will confess it did take a little getting used to that they would occasionally sleep in the same bed, but being Vietnamese both the guys and the girls would pile into the same bed with nothing sexual going on. I will confess I did draw the line at us sharing the bed when it was the two of us. Sorry, but I am not quite that open minded. lol
...and even though your motivations for doing so may not be agreeable to the majority at least you acknowledge their inherent hypocrisy...
Didn't work out so well in Indiana. How about to non-caucasians, which collectively soon will be the majority in the USA? Bring back those signs that said "No Blacks, Jews, and Dogs Allowed"?
I'll agree to this: People in the business of selling intimate contact with their own body should not be compelled to frolic with those they abhor.
I like both natural-born and trans women. So far, it hasn't been an issue with any providers. Of course, I haven't had to go through any rigorous screening yet...
I always thought I wouldn't be judged by others in this hobby but it's not the reality. I have been denied GFE by 3 top providers over the last 4 months because I have seen and reviewed a couple TS providers. They were wonderful ladies one post-op and one pre-op.
I asked admin if I could remove the reviews and was told unequivocally NO, the reviews belong to TER. OK so I have seriously considered exiting TER for good, not my desire.
I work around it by using direct email and providing solid references of providers I have seen recently and are willing to give references. By the way, I'm always safe and if a provider offers bbfs I'm out the door as soon as my clothes are on (with shoes in hand)!
Kind of f-uped to be denied for this reason, IMHO!
Sorry that is happening to you but I say stick to your story and if someone doesn't like the fact that you have a TS vouching for you then on with the next, someone will be fine with it for sure. The reason I said do not work around it is because a provider could think you are hiding something more harmful when you are not. I knew someone in your situation he just ended up finding people who will or seeking out BDSM kinky providers.