TER General Board

It's hard for me to climax when I don't feel comfortable
Computer Girl 2548 reads
posted

If i'm feeling uneasy, which I do when I feel I haven't thoroughly screened someone by either receiving an escort reference or having a chance to call his office and be transferred to his voicemail, it's hard for me to climax and i'm not good at faking it.  I'll usually say i'm sorry but i'm just not going to climax and leave it at that.

I feel some men are really selfish when it comes to making us feel totally comfortable, it's like they don't even care if we enjoy the session as well.

The following story was taken from today's NY Times about a service that was raided and now her computer files with emails are being released to the public. I know that providers have told us that our information is destroyed but how can we be sure. I know I wrote to one provider from out of state requesting photos and everytime she tours my state,she sends an email.I know the ladies'safety is important and the necessity of screening but how can we also protect our info?



By JAMES DAO

Published: February 19, 2004


FREDERICK, Md., Feb. 18 — Love may be a fleeting thing, but email messages are forever. Or so the chagrined clientele of Madam Angelika Potter's Corporate Affair escort service are learning.

On Wednesday, the City of Frederick ended a long-running lawsuit by releasing evidence from a seven-month police investigation into Ms. Potter's once-thriving prostitution business, including photographs, financial ledgers, police surveillance tapes and 8,500 pages of documents, mainly email messages from the lovelorn and lusty.

The trove was set out for viewing in the elegant second-floor foyer of City Hall. Reporters sifted through boxes of documents while a television set played a police surveillance video of men entering and leaving Ms. Potter's place of business. Among the evidence was what everyone in Frederick, about 40 miles north of Washington, now knows as the "black book," Ms. Potter's meticulously maintained list of clients.

The list, with thousands of names, has been a tinderbox of controversy since Ms. Potter pleaded guilty to a misdemeanor charge of "operating a house of assignation" in November 2000, for which she paid a $100 fine.

Outraged at what they viewed a lenient penalty, some residents, including the president of the local N.A.A.C.P. chapter, accused the authorities of letting Ms. Potter off the hook to keep her client list secret. There could be only one reason, they argued. The list must contain the names of officials and other Frederick elite.

The police and prosecutors denied that, saying there was not enough evidence to convict Ms. Potter of more serious charges. The Frederick News-Post, along with a resident and The Associated Press, sued, demanding the release of the records. Late last month, a state appellate court ruled in their favor, and on Wednesday, the records went public.

It seems fair to say that at least a few men in this city of 52,000 are nervous about what lies inside. Already, City Hall has been inundated with phone calls about the list, mainly from wives asking whether their husbands are on it, officials said. More than 100 copies of "the book" have been sold at $20 apiece to the curious and vindictive alike. The News-Post has assigned six people, including the publisher, to search the files for familiar names.

The acting publisher, Robin L. Quillon, said the paper did not intend to print the entire list of men who paid $250 an hour at Ms. Potter's. But Mr. Quillon said his paper was determined to find out whether there had indeed been a cover-up of official misconduct, or at least hanky-panky.

"How can a major investigation fizzle when it reaches the county courthouse?" Mr. Quillon asked in an interview. "We're not here to titillate. But we believe prominent public officials, by virtue of their duties, can be judged by a different standard."

Ms. Potter's list has already helped end one career, that of Blaine Young, whose name was on a partial list released in 2001. Mr. Young, an alderman at the time and the son of a former mayor, said he had hired the women to dance at parties, not for sex. He decided not to run for re-election after The News-Post published reports on his liaisons.

The controversy may also have contributed to the defeat in 2001 of Mayor James S. Grimes, who fought against releasing the records and was an ally of Mr. Young. Jennifer P. Dougherty, a restaurant owner, challenged Mr. Grimes on an open-government platform, promising to release the black book. She won handily.

But the release was not so easy. The city's insurance company told Ms. Dougherty that she had to fight an order from a lower court to release the files, lest the city be liable to suits by angry johns. The mayor appealed, and the city lost on Jan. 28 in the Court of Special Appeals.

Since then, the city's four lawyers have been reading every  e-mail message and document, editing out Social Security numbers and financial information about the clients. Copying the documents has cost the city $10,000, officials said.

The process has also put the city in the odd position of being an official purveyor of pornography, because it has to release a smutty homemade video seized by the police. The city offers "private screenings" of the video, which it also sells for $20.

"This isn't exactly what I expected to be doing when I went to law school," Heather Price Smith, the city's chief legal services officer, said.

The thousands of messages, from the kinky to the quotidian, show the inner working of the prostitution ring and pornographic Web site that Ms. Potter ran from home in Walkersville and an apartment here before her arrest in July 1999. (The Web site remains in operation.)

There are inquiries from a Baltimore man who wanted to dress like a woman while being seduced by a woman and from a Maryland man who wanted to film a naked woman dialing the phone for 20 minutes.

Pat from Seattle wondered whether a woman could meet him at Baltimore/Washington International Airport. Sam wanted a night session involving "three physical encounters."

"My needs are pretty strong," he wrote.

Alan requested a special birthday encounter with Ms. Potter herself.

Women sent photos asking to join the escort service. So did men. One, "Bambam," who sent messages from a House of Representatives Internet address, asked to be listed as an exotic dancer on the Web site.


-- Modified on 2/19/2004 12:16:18 AM

You also can't be sure that when she emails one of your references or a provider she picked at random of those you have reviewed that she will not send that lady more information than you originally gave the lady she is trying to use as a reference.

The moral of the story is to only give out that information you feel comfortable in disclosing.

ProviderAdvocate2986 reads

then don't sweat it, whatever the lady says to the other lady. Your image should be golden to her, that is IF you 2 had a good time, you were cleaned, and were very gentlemanly. If you were acting like an A-hole, then I can see why you would be worried what was being said. Yes, I want to know if YOU, were a gentleman, came to her washed/cleaned, and were not an A-HOLE> So, I will ask questions! If I am going to spend some time with someone, I want to make sure that it will be a comfortable time, not a time where I spend either avoiding your rough touches, harsh kisses, wiping the dirty bum, BUT spending quality time pleasuring you.

Dirk Bogard2642 reads

Shame on them!

I say chap, this is very disturbing, not only from the standpoint of wasted taxpayer's dollars but havn't we learned
from our mistakes of 9/11. There are BIGGER,FOUL,EVIL fish to fry;and the type that I refer to, will continue to try and destoy everything we have grown to appreciate in America.

This town in Maryland is a bedroom community of our capital, Washington D.C.and at last look, NO ONE has been brought to justice in those horrible anthrax mailings;and sadly,perhaps it's quite possble that the LE resources used for these victimless shenanagans could have been used for our Nation's security.Perhaps,one of the many investigators used for what resulted in a $100.00 slap of the wrist could have been investigating the pilot training memo.
Furthermore, publishing all this "heresay" information makes no sence whatsoever except killing a few more trees and sadly destroying peoples lives at the expense of inept Bureaucracy.

Tally-Ho!









-- Modified on 2/19/2004 5:57:18 AM

Anya2683 reads

There's actually a current case here (just north of Toronto,) where the police are actually calling people who were on an SPs hard drive, she apparently kept detailled info on real names, addresses, phone numbers and place of work.  THey busted her incall, as the story goes.  Live and learn, I guess.

-Anya

Landem3904 reads

To all those here who seem to believe that the persecution of this little hobby of ours, and all manner of invasions of privacy, are inventions of the current administration, please note the date of the orginal arrest and guilty plea: November, 2000.

(chorus) Those were the good old days . . .
(apologies to Archie and Edith)

some of us refuse to give out all of the information that you request.

Many of us pose no threat to your safety.  It is up to you to either choose not to deal with us (completely legitimate and entirely your prerogative), or use your brains, intuition and other information to reach an informed decision.

This is NOT an attack on your business practices, just an appeal to recognize the position of some of us who know how dangerous information is.  Most of us are just careful, not violent psychopaths.

We each live by our own set of rules (at least until the tequila starts kicking in....)

;o)

Would that make ladies feel at ease?

Would out some of us too.

Especially me- with such a distinct signature (You know if I've seen you).

There is only one lady who knows me by my handle. Everyone else knows me by my name.

I had a string on whether one ought to share TER info with ladies...

SirPrize4023 reads

for both the provider and the hobbiest.

Each must do what they feel comfortable with. There is no right or wrong.

I'm new to posting and am undecided if I will divulge my screen name to any of the women I see.

SP

Computer Girl2549 reads

If i'm feeling uneasy, which I do when I feel I haven't thoroughly screened someone by either receiving an escort reference or having a chance to call his office and be transferred to his voicemail, it's hard for me to climax and i'm not good at faking it.  I'll usually say i'm sorry but i'm just not going to climax and leave it at that.

I feel some men are really selfish when it comes to making us feel totally comfortable, it's like they don't even care if we enjoy the session as well.

justaplayer2387 reads

you see the same client, when your comfort level is a little bit higher. The first time if a client didn't wish to be screened and the overall performance of the session was somehow marginalized due to you being apprehensive; afterwards, just be honest and explain, that the more you see someone and gain greater familarity the better the experience. I am sure the client would understand (at least I would try getting together another time ).

It is important that both people feel comfortable. Let's not forget what has been previously discussed on these boards, a commercial companion does not have to see someone who refuses to be screened, just as a potential client does not have to see a lady that requires screening. I am sure there are some men that don't mind being screened, just as there are many ladies that don't screen.

Register Now!