The thread below got me wondering about this because there have been clients with whom I had an amazing time but they did not become "regulars" after that. And yeah, I'd really like to have some playtime with them again with or without the meter running.
Now, I don't think I personally would ever actually throw that offer out there to someone but as a hypothetical:
If you met with a provider once or twice, and then out of the blue she contacted you to tell you she'd like to hook up just for fun, free of charge, no strings attached..... what would you think?
Would this be crossing the line?
Would you just be too suspicious of her motives to take her up on it, even if you were physically inclined to do so?
Any other thoughts or opinions?? 
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo
and obviously my answer is "Why the hell not?"
Now I can't remember a provider ever throwing the "let's hook up for free" at me. Usually it's would you like to go to dinner, drinks, the movies, or some other non BCD activity, but somehow we end up in bed together, just like a civvy date that "goes well", but yeah seeing as how I am single, and enjoy the company of most of the women I see, I don't see a problem with it at all, actually it's highly flattering that a woman who has guys lined up wanting to pay her for her "company" would be offering to see me for free.
it very rarely happens..but it does happen..
on a higher level, I always want to explore more! It would probably work only as a "fuck-buddy" scenario, at least with me. I've had close relationships with providers outside of the business and it was too awkward/dramatic to continue. But thatis another topic.
It's fun.
One time I was just sitting watching my favorite show TMZ and I get a text from a friend who just was texting really sexy stuff. She had never done that before, and when I went to see her she admitted that she really was drunk and stuff.
But she's a sweetheart and fun to play with.
Was she still with CosmicSuckUp at the time?
If so, I guess it's no wonder she was shitfaced.
But she's made no bones about how much she likes me as well.
The lady that sent me the text is really hot too. She has a really tiny slit, just how I like them.
That includes friends with benefits or dating. Or if my ATF wanted to hook me up with a friend of hers, or whatever. If there's chemistry, I'll go for it, donation or no donation.
In terms of playtime, I've gotten OTC a few times, but nothing regular. Depending on who it it, I'd be open to it.
I saw a wonderful provider and at one point it became pretty regular. We had many occasions that we would go over on time and she would not be bothered at all because she was there for fun and this was as fun for her as it was for me. If she were to contact me and ask for a hookup off the books so to speak I would have dropped everything and met her. Not because it was free but because I had a legitimately good time with her.
So for me it would depend on the "relationship". I do not think that is crossing the line at all with an established client. I would see it as a motive of I kind of like our time together and want to play more. The only thing that may scare someone off would be if they were afraid of an actual relationship resulting
Couple of reason that I feel it's a good idea:
1. It will make it appear more "normal" and not cross the line and a better chance of getting him to come back.
2. You can do a test drive and see if the connection is real. If it's not real then you can change it back to regular rate.
3. If he won't take the bait of a big discount then he's probably not going to be interested in anything else.
Personally, I like to be with someone who really like me (not because I pay her). I will probably continue to pay her even I was offered because hobby money doesn't matter to me very much and I can't afford to let things get complicated, but I will probably see her more often.
and is completely contrary to what SHE seems to want.
offering a "special" is still soliciting him for money, and she's made it pretty plain that is NOT what she is talking about here. She is not looking for "normal" here, she's asking how most of us would react to a provider just offering to hook up because she likes you, with no ulterior motives involved.
Why do so many people have to make this so complicated? If two people like each other, why all the angst just because they met via P4P?
I wish things are simpler, but they are not. If a provider ask me to be her fuck buddy for free after 1 meeting then I will probably not reply nor go back to see her. I would have a huge concern that she could become a potential BSC stalker. I am not in a position that I won't have to be worried about it (SO, job, friends, etc.). That is just me. A direct approach won't work on me. She should know all the possibility and decide what approach works for her.
If the attraction and interests were mutual - a definite yes !
Posted By: DebbieNoonerGirl
The thread below got me wondering about this because there have been clients with whom I had an amazing time but they did not become "regulars" after that. And yeah, I'd really like to have some playtime with them again with or without the meter running.
Now, I don't think I personally would ever actually throw that offer out there to someone but as a hypothetical:
If you met with a provider once or twice, and then out of the blue she contacted you to tell you she'd like to hook up just for fun, free of charge, no strings attached..... what would you think?
Would this be crossing the line?
Would you just be too suspicious of her motives to take her up on it, even if you were physically inclined to do so?
Any other thoughts or opinions??
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo
I don't mind some extra time if not services, but to go all out FB can really open the door to, let's say, misunderstandings, and worse
Just because they enjoy it. Perish the thought.
I only speak for myself, but if life has taught me anything it is that love is free.
But sex will still cost you.
And yes, that may be cynical, but remember cynics keep hypocrites honest
I have to disagree with your statement. Love isn't free at all. True love is far more expensive than sex. I'm a bit surprised you'd see it backwards. Did you ever marry that other woman? I lost track of that period in your life.
-- Modified on 9/8/2015 1:43:07 PM
I am afraid my attempt to be ironic has landed with a thud.
Suffice it to say, you are correct
There are a couple I wouldn't pay to fuck again, but for free? Hellz yeah! I'm with GaG on this one - what's complicated about this, and what kind of idiot would turn an NSA offer down?
There are more than a few women I have seen that I would not see again, even for free. OTOH The overwhelming majority I would love to see again, and if one of those lovely ladies were to reach out to be unsolicited to invite me out, I would not only be honored and flattered, but I would do everything in my power to be available as well.
Speaking of which, I have a flight I need to schedule to come visit the last woman who invited me for a "freebie" Hey Alex, I am on my way
Don't forget there are a bunch of us waiting to see that chick fight before you have your freebie. 
Like the scorpion, it's just her nature.
I'm in DC right now, isn't she in Baltimore? Three-some?! Bahahahahaha!
Posted By: GaGambler
Like the scorpion, it's just her nature.
but if you would like to take LWAM off my hands so I can concentrate on "earning" my freebie, it might prevent us from completely trashing a hotel suite
I'm just LMAO at the thought of you and LWAM in the same area code much less the same hotel room.
"Maybe" she would stop obsessing over me if you gave her a good fucking?
Why not give it a chance and try something new?
If the sex is that good and it leads to fuck buddies.
Then it's a win for both parties involved.
I am sure the lady will still get gifts at times even when it's not required.
The guy does not have to think about how much time or the cost. LOL
Posted By: DebbieNoonerGirl
The thread below got me wondering about this because there have been clients with whom I had an amazing time but they did not become "regulars" after that. And yeah, I'd really like to have some playtime with them again with or without the meter running.
Now, I don't think I personally would ever actually throw that offer out there to someone but as a hypothetical:
If you met with a provider once or twice, and then out of the blue she contacted you to tell you she'd like to hook up just for fun, free of charge, no strings attached..... what would you think?
Would this be crossing the line?
Would you just be too suspicious of her motives to take her up on it, even if you were physically inclined to do so?
Any other thoughts or opinions??
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo
So I have only met a handful of ladies, but there is only one that takes my breath away. I would always welcome her even if she just was having a bad day and wanted to talk. I would listen. She offered to meet me off the clock once when my friend past away, but our schedules didn't click.
Anyone else and a phone call out of the blue would not be right. It's like when guys say they see a provider in public and want to start a conversation. I think the two should come to an agreement beforehand.
There have been a couple who I would welcome this arrangement with. As long as we both are in agreement about boundaries.
There are many ways this can go quite negative, based on personal experience, such as the following.
1. The provider may become jealous of the guy's paying other escorts and not her. This can result in her rationing ass or otherwise holding back or acting out or expecting him (even without ever asking him) to not pay others for play. The result is the same: Turmoil.
2. Either may catch feelings. Given they both are likely actively seeing others for pay, jealousy or unrealistic expectations can kick-in. The result is the same: Turmoil.
3. If the provider is bisexual, the risk of the guy becoming jealous (rightly or wrongly) is multiplied. She can even be romantically involved with another woman provider he is seeing. The result is the same: Turmoil.
IMHO the best way to address this is to discuss it openly before going down the path. More than likely, keeping things pay-for-play is the best route, even if a ton of OTC is involved. Keep that going for as long as it naturally lasts. The odds are things will fizzle out within a few months. If not, talk things out again and explore the possibilities verbally including the risks of the above-noted outcomes happening.
Communication and realistic expectations are the key, in my view
Unless one or both of the parties are BSC, the worst that can happen is it doesn't work out and they both go their separate ways.
I say "go with the flow" Not everyone falls in love with everyone they have sex with. Many of us can "fall in like" with someone and not stress over it like so many of you seem to do.
This is the reason I refuse to self identify as a "hobbyist" Some of you are downright pathetic.
I have been in a lot of "real" relationships with hookers and even more relationships with non hookers. The hooker relationships have almost universally been less drama filled than the non hooker relationships.
the issue. Without pay, there is no reason to be together but mutual pleasure and enjoyment. It can be the best sex of your life, which happened to me twice. But both times there was more than sex happening. By hour, the sex was far less than the talking, the laughing, the baths, the Sundays, the dinners, etc. It can slide right into a relationship without either trying. Meanwhile, The Hobby continues: Reviews, unavailable evenings, the pillow/shop talk, etc.
If an escort and a non-paying client are so lucky that they have intense sexual chemistry and can be strictly fuck buddies without actually enjoying each other's company, and indulging that enjoyment with non-sexual time together, wow: What a great deal! Take it and run with it.
Problem is: People are usually more "complicated" than that. Hence the need for caution
I would never have a fuck buddy where I didn't enjoy her company. That doesn't mean I would have to fall in love and "own" her. It would just mean that two people who enjoy each others company, have at least one or two interests in common, and are great in the sack together. For the life of me I can't figure out what's wrong with that.
I think too many of you can't differentiate between love and like. You don't have to fall in love with everyone that you both like and fuck. Relationships like this can run their course with both parties getting something out of it and with no regrets when they end.
Dear Debra:
I was just wondering how would you go about establishing the nature and scope of the relationship? Also what are the main questions you would have in terms of frequency of visits and a preferred price for those times as well? Also what are you questions regarding boundaries and how much lead time would you need as well? Those are critical questions that you might want to ask yourself and go over with those that might fall in to that class of preference.
Never would happen to me anyway, I don't even play at home. Anyway, I happen to love my W and I like the really clear lines offered by the green stuff in the envelope. My big head tells me that the day I sleep with someone without having the envelope as a facilitator, then I really should just call it quits on the marriage.
Regardless of how tempted I might be, I will not sleep with a civilian for that same reason. Perhaps a tad irrational and silly but the envelope provides me with a bit of a reprieve and a safety blanket. Hey, mental gymnastics is fun! :
Rationalizing to yourself that only having sex for pay is somehow less like really cheating is something that even a "non cheating" guy like me can understand. I have dated a lot of hookers and what they do to make money I never considered "cheating" if I found out they were fucking some other guy for free I would in most cases find it a "betrayal" of sorts.
As you said, "mental gymnastics is fun" lol
Are okay with him never paying again. Really hard to give it away and then when that gives out, go back to p4p.
But if he is into it, have at it. Nothing wrong with that since it is your idea and you know that you will be losing him as a paying john.
I know I asked about a particular boy, but he's single and I'm more fully interested.
But if you just really want more action from a client because he's got skills? Put that man on your "private advertising plan." I have a few yummy times that I make sure to stay in touch with, a little text chatting and flirting here and there. It's a chicken-and-egg question, but often I text my favorites and often my favorites become regulars. Certainly more regular.
You could even just say, "I've got a free hour, want to fill it?" or "I've got no appointment this afternoon, help a girl out?" That's what to do if you're an escort and just want to f@ck. If he takes you up on it, make it extra worth his while for cumming, I mean coming, when you're the most hot and heavy for it.
Interesting approach, a private advertising plan. Here is how I see your approach because I have two that let me know when they are available to play. I can't always see them when they are available for various reasons, budget constraint being one of them.
However, if we're fuck buddies and you call wanting to hook up. Well, that's the same as ringing the dinner bell and whatever those various reasons are that I couldn't see you in a P4P scenario, I'll make sure they aren't reasons any more.
Well, you can't always see them but I said favoriteS, not favorite (which I'm sure you are).
I would hope that they each consider me a favorite because sometimes we all play together. The benefit of spending time with two ladies who are also good friends 
This shit happens all the time and so does the "I fell for a hooker scenario" and providers wonder why they are being stalked, then outed. Gosh....
I guess I am just not that needy when it comes to having someone around me all the time, or for d*ck. I get enough d*ck from you guys and I have enough friends and family to 'hang out' with should the need arise.
is what I'd call myself if I ever say NO to such offer (LOL)
Ok so it may or maynot be crossing the line. Or she has ulterior motives. Or whatever... free pussy is free pussy and that's ALL I will care about!
PS: Nah, I firmly believe I'm smart and savvy enough to handle whatever comes with a free pussy. Bring it on! ;
I would have no interest in having a hooker girlfriend. My mindset is different when seeing a whore than when seeing a civilian. I would certainly not be OK with the idea of a girlfriend fucking other men. If it starts as a hooker/John relationship it ends that way. Yes, it's inappropriate.
I think you can count on this not being an issue for you.
Posted By: Arovet
I think you can count on this not being an issue for you.
Reverse the question. How many hookers would want a guy who paid them for sex to be a boyfriend? Do you really think there are a lot of hookers who would want a monger for a boyfriend?
-- Modified on 9/9/2015 7:49:43 AM
and you're definitely not. But enjoy your tired old stereotypes if they comfort you. And don't forget, light's out at 8pm sharp, right after 700 Club!
Posted By: Oldtimemonger
Posted By: Arovet
I think you can count on this not being an issue for you.
Reverse the question. How many hookers would want a guy who paid them for sex to be a boyfriend? Do you really think there are a lot of hookers who would want a monger for a boyfriend?
-- Modified on 9/9/2015 7:49:43 AM
As it happens, I've known more providers who HAVE dated a client than those who never had.
Not an overwhelming majority, mind you, and not all of these situations turned into an actual relationship... but more working ladies I've met HAVE tried dating clients than hadn't.
Now maybe I've just happened to associate with more open-minded ladies than not, I don't know, but that's been my personal experience. Call it an informal survey, if you will.
Please note, though, that my OP was NOT asking about dating. Just hooking up for casual sex sans payment.
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo
Besides the hookers that somehow wanted me as a BF, I can think of dozens of hookers that I know or have known personally that have had monger boyfriends. I bet you if I think hard enough, that number might actually be in the hundreds.
but I am sure Arovet is right, YOU have nothing to worry about in this regard. I just don't see women throwing themselves at you, especially dirty and sordid hookers.
Posted By: GaGambler
Besides the hookers that somehow wanted me as a BF, I can think of dozens of hookers that I know or have known personally that have had monger boyfriends. I bet you if I think hard enough, that number might actually be in the hundreds.
but I am sure Arovet is right, YOU have nothing to worry about in this regard. I just don't see women throwing themselves at you, especially dirty and sordid hookers.
From what I've seen it happens but it's relatively rare. I have seen sex workers try to latch on to rich men.
I'm glad I have nothing to worry about.
but regardless of your financial status, I agree you have nothing to worry about.
You've "seen" them? Pray tell, where and when did you "see" this happen? You were right there, at the dinner table perhaps, watching a SW try to "latch on" to a "rich man" with her mercenary little claws? Are you sure you weren't in a theater seat when you "saw" this?
Posted By: Oldtimemonger
From what I've seen it happens but it's relatively rare. I have seen sex workers try to latch on to rich men.
I'm glad I have nothing to worry about.
"Seen them." No. Told by agency owners and hookers who knew what their hooker pals were up to, Yes.
Then the correct statement would have been "I've HEARD that sex workers try to latch on to rich men." But that doesn't fit as well with your "been there, done that and I'll tell you how it all is" narrative, right?
Posted By: Oldtimemonger
"Seen them." No. Told by agency owners and hookers who knew what their hooker pals were up to, Yes.
I might ask what your agenda. I've SEEN madams and hookers who TOLD me about it. Did I get that correct enough for you? What is your point? Arguing for the sake of arguing
As much as most guys would jump at the thought of your buddy idea, I've seen too many ladies cross too many boundaries to believe you. So let me just turn down your wild offer. But if you want to give me a huge volume discount, and throw in a freebie on my four fake birthdays, I'll give it some thought.
Posted By: mojojo
As much as most guys would jump at the thought of your buddy idea, I've seen too many ladies cross too many boundaries to believe you. So let me just turn down your wild offer. But if you want to give me a huge volume discount, and throw in a freebie on my four fake birthdays, I'll give it some thought.
That's the most sensible reply in this thread.
is providers don't have enough sex? My second thought is ... What's the catch?
Posted By: DebbieNoonerGirl
The thread below got me wondering about this because there have been clients with whom I had an amazing time but they did not become "regulars" after that. And yeah, I'd really like to have some playtime with them again with or without the meter running.
Now, I don't think I personally would ever actually throw that offer out there to someone but as a hypothetical:
If you met with a provider once or twice, and then out of the blue she contacted you to tell you she'd like to hook up just for fun, free of charge, no strings attached..... what would you think?
Would this be crossing the line?
Would you just be too suspicious of her motives to take her up on it, even if you were physically inclined to do so?
Any other thoughts or opinions??
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo
OTC we went out for dinner, to movies and sports events. dates did not include sex. that was reserved for "pay time". after all , she had to make a living. she retired a few years ago, but we keep in touch
