Or especially those of several days, is that if the lady feels like she has to be "on" the whole time, the prices deservedly goes up.
Any extended dates that I have done it's unlikely the lady ever felt she had to be anyone other than herself during our days together. At the Jack Dunphy time rates that I have paid, I certainly hope so at least. Any woman that plans on going on a trip with me better enjoy my company, because she is not going to get rich on what I am willing to pay, and I do that by design. I don't pay for "time and companionship" If I have to pay full rate for her "time" unless it's because she is in dire need of the money, which is completely different, I feel that she is treating our time like work instead of fun, and I don't want someone spending that much time with me to be thinking of our time together as a job. I'd rather be alone than spend extended time with someone who would rather be anywhere else. Now, "faking it" for an hour BCD, sure I do that all the time. I don't expect my hour long paid dates to be doing it for any other reason but the money, and I am 100% fine with that.So, I started on the Sugar scene about three weeks ago. I was looking for something more meaningful than the normal wham bam hookups that come with the professionals. I debated about an arrangement with an ATF (which I don't have) and a traditional SB/SD relationship. What follows are my observations of that world vs. the experience with the pros.
My hope is that others who are considering activity in the sugar world will be enlightened. I am also hoping to hearing others experiences. Finally, maybe writing this note saves me some time onl my therapists couch as this gives me an outlet to clear my head here goes:
1.) The talent pool in the SB world is simply incredible! In my experience hobbying I've seen girls rated 9's and 10's consistently who, in my opinion, were more like 7's. There's a lot of grade inflation in the professional world. However, I've been in the Sugar world for3 weeks and the beauty of the ladies amazes me.
2.) The openness of the Sugar world takes some getting used to. I have been engaged with about 4 POT SB's. They don't hesitate to send selfies, provocative photos, give real phone numbers, their place of employment, etc. this takes you back a little at first as in the hobby world we all operate under cover of aliases and blurred photos. It's also ironic because in the hobby world we men give out all of our real info, but never get the ladies'. In the sugar world it is just the opposite.
3.) So far I have had many online exchanges (4 of which went somewhere). I had actual phone conversations with 4 ladies. I have had 2 meet ups so far.
4.) Of the 4 women I engaged with, 3 had regular jobs! It's amazing that regular women with jobs/careers will enter an ongoing sexual relationship for cash!!
5.) Pros and SB's are very, very different. It's almost laughable that I considered an arrangement with an ATF. These two could not be more different.
6.) I have a decision to make as my last date would like to enter an arrangement with me ($400 per week) and bi-monthly shopping. She sent me photos that suggested she was an 7-8. Imagine my surprise when I get to the restaurant and find out she's a 10!!!! I was almost embarrassed at the restaurant with all of the stares we got walking in. She's that damn hot!!
6A.) SB are NOT pros. Pros are NOT Sb's!!
7.) I decided to explore the sugar world because of my desire for a "connection". I have been somewhat disenchanted with sessions. For me, 90% of the enjoyment is from the neck up. Here's my exchange with my POT SB last week.
Me: Hey babe, I miss you, can you please take a picture of yourself and send it to me so I can see you and what you're wearing today.
SB: Here you go, I hope you like it!
Here's another e-mail exchange:
ME: OK babe, this is my last e-mail for today then I won't be bothering you anymore today.......
SB: You're not taking up my time. I like when you message me!
8.) The chances of being found out by a spouse is MUCH, MUCH greater with a SB than with a pro. If you are careful it is nearly impossible to get caught hobbying. It is commonly know in Law enforcement circles that the toughest crimes to solve are the ones that are random. While there's nothing to fear from law enforcement in the SB world, the chances of a spouse finding out are great!! Dating, once per week. Hotels weekly. My SB wants me to Take her shopping. This week I'll be taking her out to lunch Again!
Now, all that being said I'm not sure I'm going into an arrangement with a SB just yet. There are a few things
That will likely stop me from proceeding with the current proposed arrangement. For starters, my conscience won't let me at this time. I know, if I've been hobbling I've already F'd up. Somehow, I justify that in my mind. Never more than once with same girl, plausible deniability, blah. Blah blah. I just feel awful internally at the thought of a regular "on going" relationship.
Not to mention the commitment. I will be committed to $2,000 monthly. I will be committed to seeing her weekly. I will be committed to taking her out: shopping, to eat, etc. On a side note, one of the huge advantages that pros have is TER. The ability for us hobbyist to see reviews and know exactly how things will go BCD is a huge advantage. We have no idea how things will go with the POT SB.
All that being said my 3 week experience will affect my future behavior. Here's how: I'll likely cut back on my hobbying quite a bit. I am a 7-10 per year guy. That'll likely go to 3-4 per year. It is highly likely I'll enter an "arrangement" in the future. I am fascinated with the happenings in the SB world. I'll need to sort of the administrative tasks of finding/sourcing/secretly moving the required cash. I'll have to creatively find a way to have weekly meet-ups and outings. But, most of all I need time to get in the right head space.
I'm very interested I hearing fro the TER community. Writing this note has been very therapeutic for me. I hope it sheds some light for the hobbyists considering the entering the SB world.
-- Modified on 8/17/2015 8:26:20 AM
You started your thread with a little bias against pros. Many but not all "pros" are actually in this field for additional source of income besides their regular jobs. Cash may not be the only reason. Meeting others and experiencing their sexuality, satisfying their nymphomania, etc. (those are real gems....real deal because they ENJOY it) are all reasons. Like one of the providers once told me, every time she goes out to a bar or public scene, she has no difficulty getting laid, so she might as well make cash while having fun. Again, these are few and not the majority.
Now let me ask you about no-strings-attached, revealing all your life details other than what is on your DL name and address.... you did not make a comparison. Also, which SB/SD website have you had most luck with? Is it as easy for a married man as for a single to hook up with a SB?
4.) Of the 4 women I engaged with, 3 had regular jobs! It's amazing that regular women with jobs/careers will enter an ongoing sexual relationship for cash!!
The only true difference between a provider and an SB is the payment plan lol. At the end of the day, we're (mostly) all women who enjoy sex and are comfortable getting intimate with people who we may or may not actually choose to spend that kind of time with, were it not for the financial incentive to do so. There are a few minor differences (like an SB's tolerance for being texted and emailed frequently just to chat or share photos, and their willingness to share more personal information), but mostly it's the same thing in a different package.
Either way, I'm glad you seem to have found something that makes you genuinely happy. Best of luck to you and your SB! :
The down side to SB, as I see it, is that you are going to have to listen to and endure the bullshit of a relationship. Women are magnificent creatures, but they do tend to be a little catty and needy emotionally, and if you have the patience and the will to deal with all that then more power to you. And wow, you're going into this while being married, you're a better man than I, I couldn't deal with one woman, much less two.
Remember this though, and mark my words, you are in the beginning stages of your SB relationship, and much like any relationship we are typically at our best in the early stages, this could potentially change.
I don't intend to sound or project negativity, I sincerely hope this is everything you hope it to be and that you are happy with your decision. I just suggest you not look at this through rose colored glasses. The grass is typically not greener on the other side of the fence. The beauty of P4P is that you get the best of a lady and the best of a relationship for 2-3 hours at a time, without all the strain and stress of normal relationships.
I wish you all the best.
your post is too true!!
its like when the op first found ter..
"oh my god, let me tell you guys! if found the most amazing site!! you can find girls and you can pay some money to have sex with them!! what could go wrong!!!!!"
rose colored glasses for sure.
there are happy stories and there are horror stories in everything.
some people can have the happy story and their neighbor could have the horror story about the same place. its amazing what perspective does. 
xo
Once you go sugar, you never go back! Well, except for a little variety. The reason the Sugar Babies look so good is youth! The average provider is around 40. The average SB is around 24. You can't beat young and fresh!
It sounds like you have been doing some strong work. BCD is usually awesome because it's non-condom civilian sex. With SBs you can do a little "training." No time limits.
Sugarbabes are unlikely to out you. Most don't want their parents/siblings etc. to know what they are doing. If you provide a steady income, they don't want to mess things up.
Enjoy your arrangements.
Blowhard
It sounds like you have been doing some strong work. BCD is usually awesome because it's non-condom civilian sex. With SBs you can do a little "training." No time limits.
Sugarbabes are unlikely to out you. Most don't want their parents/siblings etc. to know what they are doing. If you provide a steady income, they don't want to mess things up.
Enjoy your arrangements.
And in 97.2% of the cases, he seems to simply pull the numbers out of his ass.
It also appears his very first sentence is an outright lie to boot. If indeed "once you go sugar, you never go back" then WTF is he doing here on a hooker/john board?
It also appears his very first sentence is an outright lie to boot. If indeed "once you go sugar, you never go back" then WTF is he doing here on a hooker/john board?
So what do you think is the typical age of the TER escorts?
The typical age...hmmm.
The information is available in the data base...maybe someone has the initiative to export all those data files and do the math?
Problem is that the ages shown on profiles is generally off. How far off? Maybe 5 years...maybe 10?
Perhaps perfectstorm is bored today and will take on this challenge?
It also appears his very first sentence is an outright lie to boot. If indeed "once you go sugar, you never go back" then WTF is he doing here on a hooker/john board?
The numbers are based on personal observation. Hell, even you go outside the USA because you like those young chickas. I already posted VARIETY. I guess you could also say "ease of use." Finding SBs takes more time.
So what do you think is the typical age of the TER escorts?
Most of the top 100 list their age in their 30's. The ones I saw in my area's top 100 were definitely older than their stated age. Most lie about their age by 7-10 years. I don't see escorts who list their age under 25. From personal observation I'd say the ones listing their age as 28 are 35ish. The ones listing their ages at 33 are 40ish. If they list their age as 41, it means late 40's.
Add at least 7-10 years to their age. I always thought this was common knowledge. Sure, there are probably exceptions but it's been this way ever since I can remember.
-- Modified on 8/17/2015 8:33:02 AM
How about all those TER reviews of the one time gals? You know..those that find this isn't for them quickly. Seems like many of those gals are U25. And the ages that some guy may list can be anywhere between 18-25.
There are a lot of those on here.
To simply extrapolate the ones on that top 100 list is very different than taking ALL of the reviewed hookers and compiling a data base that would skew materially the ones you are trying to single out.
Most of the top 100 list their age in their 30's. The ones I saw in my area's top 100 were definitely older than their stated age. Most lie about their age by 7-10 years. I don't see escorts who list their age under 25. From personal observation I'd say the ones listing their age as 28 are 35ish. The ones listing their ages at 33 are 40ish. If they list their age as 41, it means late 40's.
Add at least 7-10 years to their age. I always thought this was common knowledge. Sure, there are probably exceptions but it's been this way ever since I can remember.
-- Modified on 8/17/2015 8:33:02 AM
I only see the well reviewed girls. IOW 20 or more reviews and have been around a year or more. If you took all the ones who have just a few reviews or were "one or two month wonders" then I think the average age would go down.
If somebody had the energy to do it ,Id want to see the average ages of the girls with 20 or more reviews and a year or more of tenure. Then add 7 years to that
by your logic, unless a hooker advertises as eleven, there are no 18 year old hookers.
Not to mention that for a hooker to have a "year of tenure" by definition all 18 year old hookers are discounted? Your math is more ridiculous than the percentages you seem to pull out of your ass and it smells just as bad to boot.
So because of the fact that YOU throw out all hookers under 25, somehow you manage to conclude that the "average" age of a hooker is forty.
That's like me saying since I don't talk to people with an IQ of less than 138, the "average" person qualifies for MENSA.
by your own convoluted math, the youngest hookers you can be seeing are 25 + 7-10 added years, or 32-35 years old. No wonder you think the average hooker is forty.
Here's an idea, If you truly believe that ALL hookers lie by at least 7 years, start looking at the women who "claim" to be 18 and there you will find your 25 year olds. Hey it's your logic, not mine. don't blame me if it doesn't make any sense.
might be convoluted but i only see high ranked experienced escorts. Most advertise at 26 and up. I should have qualified the statement.
and then YOU decided to change the parameters to try to make your math work.
If you had said what is the average age of "highly ranked experienced escorts" you might have leg to stand on, but once again you just pulled shit out of your ass by saying the average SB is 24 and the average hooker is 40.
I'll make you a deal, you quit posting dumb shit, and I'll quit calling you out for it, but I can't speak for anyone else. Once you get a reputation for just slapping shit against the wall to see how many of us are dumb enough to let it stick, it's hard to live that reputation down.
If you had said what is the average age of "highly ranked experienced escorts" you might have leg to stand on, but once again you just pulled shit out of your ass by saying the average SB is 24 and the average hooker is 40.
I'll make you a deal, you quit posting dumb shit, and I'll quit calling you out for it, but I can't speak for anyone else. Once you get a reputation for just slapping shit against the wall to see how many of us are dumb enough to let it stick, it's hard to live that reputation down.
Besides, statistics are much more fun to pull out of the air.
Now I sound like Yogi Bera.
You know, don't you, that when the most interesting man in the world is in a 50/50 situation, the odds are 80/20 in his favor. If he were to punch you in the face, you would have to fight off the urge to thank him. And, mosquitoes refuse to bite him, out of respect. Damn, I'm like butter this morning, I'm on a roll.
During their most fertile years, AND I guess you think you are the only one they are having unprotected sex with?
Sigh....
Steph
Sigh....
Steph
If I were you I would wrap it up, especially with the SBs:
"Young people (ages 15-24) account for 50% of all new STIs, although they represent just 25% of the sexually experienced population"
http://recapp.etr.org/recapp/index.cfm?fuseaction=pages.StatisticsDetail&PageID=558
Sigh....
Steph
Some of us have had a vasectomy. I have yet to meet a college age girl who was not on birth control. Even with a regular GF or wife there is no guarantee that you are the only one. There are LOTS of escorts who have SDs. That's the new code word for a well paying regular they give BBFS to. None of them will admit it. How do I know? In my area 90% of the girls on the arrangement sites are pros. When I've broached the subject none of them said no. I don't do arrangements with pros but if I wanted to they know BBFS is part of the deal.
I can't believe you are trying to turn this into a "disease thread." We are both tested regularly. She's 26. The rates of VD per 100k among whites and Asians is much lower than your doomsday page. I've never gotten anything in 8 years of doing the SB thing. I was in high school and college in the late 70's/early 80's sexual revolution. Nobody used condoms and I never got anything in that era and I was very sexually active. When I want disease info, I talk to research doctors who specialize in STIs. Most anything on the internet is suspect.
I am amazed at the hypocrisy around here. We are all supposed to be consenting adults. You do what you feel is right for YOU. I'll do what I feel is right for me.
The only "safe sex" is NO sex at all
Yeah, especially your bullshit.
You are the suspect one. Nobody could be that naive .
just your bullshit in general. There is a big difference between sharing one's experience when asked and stomping around pretending to be an expert on everything because you did some shit in 1982. That's called being a douchebag, something most of us probably do on occasion but you seem to want to corner the market.
And he's deluded trying to differentiate between pregnancy and STDs as a consequence of BBFS. Both are possible, but getting tested only helps after the fact. It's not a panacea. And, of course, we all know BBFS is happening, under lots of different circumstances. Personally, I'm a lot more concerned about STDs than pregnancy.
-- Modified on 8/17/2015 10:14:55 PM
You are the WRONG person to talk about belligerence and dumb asses.
Hanging out with an infected hooker, I see! LMAO!
This calls for a specialist in MSPD (multiple stupid personality disorder). I have called in The Department of Psychiatry and Behavioral Sciences at Stanford University. They are apprised of the situation. It's hard to treat on an internet basis. I want LR (2015 version) back. I'm tired of this L.Guapo/ L.Stinko personality. You have taken over her mind but she is strong enough to return.
This situation calls for drastic measures and potent psychotropic drugs. The disorder is related to Dissociative identity disorder (DID). There is no cure of course but it can be treated. I will do my best to help you
We are convinced your delusions result from SAD (Syphilitic Associative Disorder). It occurs in the Tertiary Stage of the disease and would explain your combative grumpiness.
I was told by the The Department of Psychiatry and Behavioral Sciences at Stanford University that I must expect a bellicose and recalcitrant attitude during the early stages of treating MSPD. Since LR has made an appearance there is some early progress. I will continue to do my best to normalize your mind. I am well aware that L.Guapo/L.Stinko will never admit to being LR. That is Ok. It's part of the illness.
And it ain't LR. But keep living in the dark. It's fun to watch.
Best of all I needed a stalker to be "important" around here. Gambler told me that. I don't mind L.Guapo stalking me. It's fun to watch. Carry on!
-- Modified on 8/18/2015 7:36:20 PM
But still wrong. Here's a hint: You are over-thinking this.
I'm glad I'm "validated." My first stalker is a pint sized girl who stands 5'2" on a phone book, weighs 110 pounds soaking wet and has a mouth the size of the Grand Canyon. Why me???
Pathetic. And you are still really confused. I already told you I was London. I live inside her vajayjay. Have you ever seen one?
One other thing. When I noticed you were back I looked at your web page. You lost too much weight. Short blondes with big boobs look hotter when they have some meat/fluffiness on them. Start eating again.
Everybody is shaped by their experiences that can include real life observations and what others in a position to know has told him.
Example: 50% of the guys in the Silicon Valley make good money but lack social skills. Do I know for sure it's 50%? Hell No. It might be 22% or it might be 78%. I'm just going by my own observations and what others have noticed. If we were talking about coders I'd say 90% of them lack social skills. Just my observations.
The fact you think I pretend to be an expert on everything is your observation. That does not make it true. See how that works?
If we are to be held to some sort of a legal standard, most posts could not be written
So 3 weeks in and you think these 4 POT SB's have a genuine interest in you? Sure they do. That is laughable. So many women seek attention via sending half nude or nude pics on social media and to whatever BF of the week they have, sorry if you thought you were special. FYI hookers have real jobs and real lives, whether we make it your business or not to know, depends on the hooker. Glad you have made such a delineation between the two worlds, but withhold the sugar and the shopping and see if she will still stroke your ego and suck your dick... I am not sour nor bitter about either world but I just like seeing it for what it is. If I am bored enough I will play SB too but he has to be hot and fun in my opinion I can't fake it for that long. I also wouldn't seek a guy who is as needy as you sound but hey there is someone for everyone.
A very realistic view of the whole situation Jaye!!
It is what it is!
Well put!
3 weeks and not a single SB date and you got it all figured out. That rambling post is useless.
After reviewing some of the comments and re-reading my original message there are a few things I'd like to add:
1.) I am in no way Dissing the pros. I like and appreciate the ability to hobby. There are still situations where the pros will not only do well, but dominate. For example, when I am traveling and in a different city for a short period, I'll still call a pro.
2.) One of the ladies made a comment about me being needy another couple made fun of me not getting laid yet. This is why I was trying to make the very wide distinction. Having a SB is very different from scheduling with a Pro and getting laid. It is NOT for everyone but suits me. In my first few conversations and texts I actually felt the way that I did back in college. Because you are actually getting to know someone there is an intimacy, butterflies and anticipation. Yes, it's a big arrangement, but NOT in the sense that a session is. As an example, I had more than one POT turn me down as they said they couldn't "date" a married man. I'll be damned if that ever happened with a Pro.
3.) Before you meet-up or start serious communication they always ask for photos and some info on you. They want to make sure any guy the DATE is worthy. Again, these are two separate planets.
So, again sorry if I offended any providers. I love you ladies and my experiences have been good. But, for me, and for the time being I'm mesmerized by the world of Sugars......
-- Modified on 8/17/2015 8:28:29 AM
In college, while I wasn't having a lot of intercourse, I had a lot of hookups- guys just wanting me to go down on them or them wanting to go down on me. There was no money when I was in college to "date" endlessly, mostly drunken hookups or come over and "watch a movie,"which meant something sexual was going down. I didn't start aimlessly dating until later and realized it wasn't for me, I was too slutty to hold out, lol, so yeah if butterflies and anticipation of nothing gets you off keep trucking with the SB's. Sounds like you may be head over heels, but again it will always be an arrangement.
And honestly...if a guy couldn't get laid in college...good grief LOL
As I would look around every day on campus...I just kept on thinking of the "miles and miles of perfectly good pussy" that was available.
I guess to the dudes who didn't take advantage back then...this is their attempt to go back in time. But even in those days...I had NO interest in "dating" as this dude wants...simply to have fun...fuck..more fun..fuck some more. And then later find a different gal to have fun...fuck...more fun..and so on and so on.
It's not like he is insisting we all do it "his way"
It doesn't sound like he is out more than the price of a couple of meals and it appears the time he is "wasting" in everyone else's opinion is time he is enjoying himself, so why is everyone slamming him. What he is doing makes a lot more sense than mooning over some hooker who charges two grand for a six hour "public date" going to a baseball game with no time for any BCD time. Now THAT guy deserves some ribbing, not the OP who is just exploring some other options and having fun in the process.
Which would you rather do, pay a hooker to watch her eat? or give a sugar baby about the same amount of money as you give the guy who parks your car to do the same thing? Some guys actually do pay for "time and companionship" at least he isn't doing so at hooker prices.
I didn't comment that the OP hasn't gotten laid yet.
I did comment that I don't believe he got laid in college..or certainly high school..and likely nothing even after those pussy smorgasbords.
As for what I'd rather do...I don't pay to watch anyone eat. Just no interest in that...ever. If someone wants to join me...I'd be happy to pay for the meal...but no chance I'd pay for anyone to eat/drink/shit on my dime.
But others like that..no problem.
However dating an escort/sugar baby/hooker/prostitute isn't dating when they are getting paid. It doesn't matter what any of them charge...it's still prostitution and the only reason they're going out with some old fart like the OP.
It doesn't sound like he is out more than the price of a couple of meals and it appears the time he is "wasting" in everyone else's opinion is time he is enjoying himself, so why is everyone slamming him. What he is doing makes a lot more sense than mooning over some hooker who charges two grand for a six hour "public date" going to a baseball game with no time for any BCD time. Now THAT guy deserves some ribbing, not the OP who is just exploring some other options and having fun in the process.
Which would you rather do, pay a hooker to watch her eat? or give a sugar baby about the same amount of money as you give the guy who parks your car to do the same thing? Some guys actually do pay for "time and companionship" at least he isn't doing so at hooker prices.
Everyone seems to be beating him up because he likes the "fantasy" of a "real GF" without paid several hundred dollars an hour for time that in his case is mainly "Non BCD" time.
I agree with you, if I wanted to pay for friendship, I'd buy a dog. but the OP isn't you or me. He wants to feel that "connection" even if he knows it's a lie and that is just like the other pro's and that when the money goes away so does she.
I will agree that his statement that SB's are not "pro's" was a rather naïve one, but aside from that I have no desire to shit on his parade.
Yep..every college age woman just can't wait for some old fart to date her.
Good luck...I'm sure you'll be every young woman's fantasy.
Think back to when you were 22 again...pretty fucking scary to think of what you're looking to replicate now.
3.) Before you meet-up or start serious communication they always ask for photos and some info on you. They want to make sure any guy the DATE is worthy. Again, these are two separate planets.
So, again sorry if I offended any providers. I love you ladies and my experiences have been good. But, for me, and for the time being I'm mesmerized by the world of Sugars......
-- Modified on 8/17/2015 8:28:29 AM
The reason they are in it is the same as any lady who does something like this, she needs financial help. No sugar baby just wants to go out and have fun with old married guys, if they think they do - they learn very quick that it's too hard if you don't at least like someone a little. Personally, I started as an SB and still operate on a similar level, so please know that not all providers are the same. Some of us truly are low volume and only see the same few people ever week or every other, most of the time this has been going on for years. Along with that, connection is very important to some of us and I would actively avoid a "wham bam" appointment, I've done it in the past and will do it again. Some of us are just as dissatisfied with that as you are, so it doesn't always have to be that way.
I'm not saying you should go back to pros, feel free to explore sugar to your hearts desire..just remember that not all providers are the same just like all SB's wont be. We are all regular women and we all make consolations to gain monetary gain from another party we're spending time with, in many cases - they are the exact same consolations.
Please know this isn't me being offended besides being lumped into some large category, I do wish you luck on your endeavor and hope you understand that this is only meant to inform not insult.
Oh and by the way..I am 28..seriously. And that's what all my profiles say. I have no problem proving it. Some of us have no qualms being exactly who we are representing ourselves to be.
are you posting this here?
and under and alias?
why not go post this on the sugar daddy website.
there are plenty of ladies that cross over, but for us that dont...
please tell us where you work so we can go to your website and explain why we believe a different idea is better and try to pull away your customers.
i think the primary difference between providers and SBs is that although some providers will scream to the heavens that it isn't about sex, it is the primary focus in P4P relationships. On the other hand SB relationships can be sexual, but I think the bulk of the appeal lies in courtship. I don't think it's needy, but some guys just like to feel like they're 20 again, dating their college girlfriend. SBS are aware of this, so they make sure to play up that puppy love charm. Those photos and info they're asking for? It isn't just about connection. It's so she can google you and find additional info that you may not be willing to share. She wants to make sure those photos are actually of you and she wants to find out your position so she can estimate your salary and how much you can afford to pay her. It doesn't make one better than the other. Just business.
In addition, the reason so many SBs prefer married men is because married guys won't get too attached out of fear of jeopardizing their marriages, so no need to worry about him wanting something more than what you're willing to give.
One called my phone at 02:30 on a Saturday morning. It was a good thing I had her cell phone number on block. Another time she sent me a text with my wives name and address on it. She was trying to blackmail me back into a relationship.
They don't know the rules of proper protocol and engagement like providers do.
This has always been my contention. She has no reputation to protect. There might be random yahoogroups and other mailing lists, but there is nothing like TER for the sugar world. You take a higher risk.
And as Estella mentioned above, there are plenty of providers who are more personable than a typical wham bam situation. So when one wants to experience butterflies, he can absolutely have that without worrying it will cost him a lot more than the agreed on amount. He just needs to learn how to find that here.
And as Estella mentioned above, there are plenty of providers who are more personable than a typical wham bam situation. So when one wants to experience butterflies, he can absolutely have that without worrying it will cost him a lot more than the agreed on amount. He just needs to learn how to find that here.
Yes there are providers that are more personable than a wham bam. Still, there is no hooker sex that will be like civilian sex. You are unlikely to find the same thing here for a variety of reasons
and what's this about the psychiatrist's couch?
If this is driving you nuts, then why bother?
The hobby clears my mind, and I can engage in enough passion and closeness to keep me happy though it.
Sounds to me like this SB/SD thing is like TNT
It gets sort of boring being with the same person. It almost like having a 2nd wife. Stay away from the ones that have kids and/or have a boyfriend/ex boyfriend still in their lives. They are not always up front in disclosing the nature of relationships they are in. It is good that you set boundaries.
If you have to host all the time think about getting an apartment. Hotels can add up bigtime if you are seeing her 3 times a week. Be prepared to walk away if her requests get to be too much. Remember your are not a ATM.
For a married man it is better to hobby than to have a sugar babe on the side.
How did you find the SB's..
I have always been interested but skeptical about the ad sites.
PM me if you will
Thanks
There is definitely something that changes your perspective... I have some friends in this business who like to travel a lot, and booking the vacations, with occasional get togethers, can get very expensive.
I have actually suggested to a client or two to look into sugar baby arrangements upon not agreeing with my extended rates. That or enter a non-monogamous arrangement with someone in the industry. Usually if a girl enjoys the guy, and their set up doesn't feel like pulling teeth, those can be a buck saver too.
The problem with this isn't always finances, as much as it has to do with marriage, and potential to have a girl get too attached, stalking or getting too involved in his life. So the big bucks seems to be more of a way to pay them off not to get too attached, or need too much contact.
That's what I've been told, anyway.
Thank you for sharing your experience. I feel similar to you. The hobby is great and the women are top notch. But, I sometimes want a bit more. Not much, but a little bit. It seems like SB may provide the balance.
Others have listed the risks and rewards very well, so I won't repeat.
Please report back on your progress.
Can very dangerous when they get attached as a sugar babe (they consider it a girlfriend/boyfriend relationship), jealously gets involved. The time commitment is enormous for a sugar babe arrangement. For time efficiency sakes that provider arrangement is much better. The costs of a sugar babe being cheaper is debatable. Guys put themselves at high risks if they have a wife or so or at home.
I couldnt do it. I need variety to keep my mind off of one person. That's one reason I think we can do this without getting attached or needy. So a guy can pay no attention to us, then book a date months later if he wants, while we get sexed up in the mean time.
And I also feel if a guy wants a monogamous, non moonlighting sugar baby, naturally she would expect payment in attention and time, on top of funds.
Hence, why all about money is beneficial to some. You pay not to have to invest in a relationship.. And not to have the attached mistress.
For some it works great. For others, not . There's no perfect or better solution for everybody. If there was, all different service types wouldn't be in business so long.
Same with body type, etc.
The one I had offered BBFS, I declined. I decided to slowly end the relationship.
Hence, why I think this works way better. 
Or especially those of several days, is that if the lady feels like she has to be "on" the whole time, the prices deservedly goes up.
Any extended dates that I have done it's unlikely the lady ever felt she had to be anyone other than herself during our days together. At the Jack Dunphy time rates that I have paid, I certainly hope so at least. Any woman that plans on going on a trip with me better enjoy my company, because she is not going to get rich on what I am willing to pay, and I do that by design. I don't pay for "time and companionship" If I have to pay full rate for her "time" unless it's because she is in dire need of the money, which is completely different, I feel that she is treating our time like work instead of fun, and I don't want someone spending that much time with me to be thinking of our time together as a job. I'd rather be alone than spend extended time with someone who would rather be anywhere else.
Now, "faking it" for an hour BCD, sure I do that all the time. I don't expect my hour long paid dates to be doing it for any other reason but the money, and I am 100% fine with that.
"POT SB" means a sugar baby who likes to get high.
Actually, I think he tried to coin a new phrase by shortening "potential".
I think mine is a little more creative.
But that's just me
and retaining an attorney for any number of reasons.
p4p is best
My hope is that others who are considering activity in the sugar world will be enlightened. I am also hoping to hearing others experiences. Finally, maybe writing this note saves me some time onl my therapists couch as this gives me an outlet to clear my head here goes:
1.) The talent pool in the SB world is simply incredible! In my experience hobbying I've seen girls rated 9's and 10's consistently who, in my opinion, were more like 7's. There's a lot of grade inflation in the professional world. However, I've been in the Sugar world for3 weeks and the beauty of the ladies amazes me.
2.) The openness of the Sugar world takes some getting used to. I have been engaged with about 4 POT SB's. They don't hesitate to send selfies, provocative photos, give real phone numbers, their place of employment, etc. this takes you back a little at first as in the hobby world we all operate under cover of aliases and blurred photos. It's also ironic because in the hobby world we men give out all of our real info, but never get the ladies'. In the sugar world it is just the opposite.
3.) So far I have had many online exchanges (4 of which went somewhere). I had actual phone conversations with 4 ladies. I have had 2 meet ups so far.
4.) Of the 4 women I engaged with, 3 had regular jobs! It's amazing that regular women with jobs/careers will enter an ongoing sexual relationship for cash!!
5.) Pros and SB's are very, very different. It's almost laughable that I considered an arrangement with an ATF. These two could not be more different.
6.) I have a decision to make as my last date would like to enter an arrangement with me ($400 per week) and bi-monthly shopping. She sent me photos that suggested she was an 7-8. Imagine my surprise when I get to the restaurant and find out she's a 10!!!! I was almost embarrassed at the restaurant with all of the stares we got walking in. She's that damn hot!!
6A.) SB are NOT pros. Pros are NOT Sb's!!
7.) I decided to explore the sugar world because of my desire for a "connection". I have been somewhat disenchanted with sessions. For me, 90% of the enjoyment is from the neck up. Here's my exchange with my POT SB last week.
Me: Hey babe, I miss you, can you please take a picture of yourself and send it to me so I can see you and what you're wearing today.
SB: Here you go, I hope you like it!
Here's another e-mail exchange:
ME: OK babe, this is my last e-mail for today then I won't be bothering you anymore today.......
SB: You're not taking up my time. I like when you message me!
8.) The chances of being found out by a spouse is MUCH, MUCH greater with a SB than with a pro. If you are careful it is nearly impossible to get caught hobbying. It is commonly know in Law enforcement circles that the toughest crimes to solve are the ones that are random. While there's nothing to fear from law enforcement in the SB world, the chances of a spouse finding out are great!! Dating, once per week. Hotels weekly. My SB wants me to Take her shopping. This week I'll be taking her out to lunch Again!
Now, all that being said I'm not sure I'm going into an arrangement with a SB just yet. There are a few things
That will likely stop me from proceeding with the current proposed arrangement. For starters, my conscience won't let me at this time. I know, if I've been hobbling I've already F'd up. Somehow, I justify that in my mind. Never more than once with same girl, plausible deniability, blah. Blah blah. I just feel awful internally at the thought of a regular "on going" relationship.
Not to mention the commitment. I will be committed to $2,000 monthly. I will be committed to seeing her weekly. I will be committed to taking her out: shopping, to eat, etc. On a side note, one of the huge advantages that pros have is TER. The ability for us hobbyist to see reviews and know exactly how things will go BCD is a huge advantage. We have no idea how things will go with the POT SB.
All that being said my 3 week experience will affect my future behavior. Here's how: I'll likely cut back on my hobbying quite a bit. I am a 7-10 per year guy. That'll likely go to 3-4 per year. It is highly likely I'll enter an "arrangement" in the future. I am fascinated with the happenings in the SB world. I'll need to sort of the administrative tasks of finding/sourcing/secretly moving the required cash. I'll have to creatively find a way to have weekly meet-ups and outings. But, most of all I need time to get in the right head space.
I'm very interested I hearing fro the TER community. Writing this note has been very therapeutic for me. I hope it sheds some light for the hobbyists considering the entering the SB world.
-- Modified on 8/17/2015 8:26:20 AM
Or since the OP says he's "only" late 40's even his granddaughter.
Of course from his prior marriage.
Her 300 lb boyfriend seeing them both at the mall together. He might not realize she has a boyfriend at home.
...avoid the SB scene! Again, this is just me, but the reason I see a professional is to avoid all (or at least 98%) of this type of BS/drama... and risk.
And since you never specifically mentioned it, did you get laid or not?
So off base. I have a real job and have many clients that I have an established connection with as much of a SB as u describe. Of course, they are being nice to you and ready cater to ur every desire. at the end of the day they still want ur money and they will do this because they don't want to be called a hooker, escort - whatever the label is. plain and simple. I personally think a SB is much more work. Good luck to u.
1.) The talent pool in the SB world is simply incredible! In my experience hobbying I've seen girls rated 9's and 10's consistently who, in my opinion, were more like 7's. There's a lot of grade inflation in the professional world. However, I've been in the Sugar world for3 weeks and the beauty of the ladies amazes me.
There's grade inflation on the SB sites also. I guess you've haven't yet met an "average" size one who is 40-50 lbs. overweight.
6A.) SB are NOT pros. Pros are NOT Sb's!!
I've spotted a number of well known pros on the SB sites. A couple even used their pro name.
8.) The chances of being found out by a spouse is MUCH, MUCH greater with a SB than with a pro. If you are careful it is nearly impossible to get caught hobbying. It is commonly know in Law enforcement circles that the toughest crimes to solve are the ones that are random. While there's nothing to fear from law enforcement in the SB world, the chances of a spouse finding out are great!! Dating, once per week. Hotels weekly. My SB wants me to Take her shopping. This week I'll be taking her out to lunch Again!
I met one SB whose friend got busted for SB prostitution. Also heard of another bust through the grapevine.
Those who have been there and done that several times, can easily see that all this new attention and desire for validation, eh, "connection" is exciting when new and fresh. When that thin veneer coat comes off, the OP will probably find out that perhaps it was not all that great as it was initially promised or perceived.
For those older guys with SOs, beware of some malicious and scorned youngins constantly exposing SD/SB relationships on The Dirty (dot com) which is a nasty and salacious gossip website. I would be very, very, very careful as to whom I would send "selfies" to!
Hopefully he will stay away from the MINE of subpenny stocks, lmfao.