Elena when embarking on the subject of negotiating, the question is that the provider has a floor and the hobbyist has a ceiling. What types of barter and exchange would you consider from a client who is interested in seeing you? Also would you also offer wholesale prices to those who would like to buy sessions in bulk? If so how do you arrange your schedule and how would you accept payment so that it is ammenable to all parties involved?
And what tells you that the hooker you're about to pay actually cares about any of this?
Such a large dispersion of interests here.
is when she opens wide and I insert my sausage inside of any one of her orifices.
The rest is bullshit and hooker etiquette. Unless she is willing to fuck for free, but that too can be troublesome.
I kid, there have been some cool women I've met here but when you connect it is pretty awkward because it blurs the lines so I rather keep it strictly business.
How can you tell? It's in her kiss, the way it gets deeper...sensual...lingering. If this doesn't ring a bell for you, then I suppose you probably haven't gotten there yet. And if it turns out that she's simply that good of an actress? Well, that's what I paid for - I can suspend my disbelief.
For the most part, the "connection" (or lack thereof) is an excuse used by civvie women, and really means "he's too ugly", "he's not exciting enough", etc. So feeling a "connection" is not a priority for me when seeing a provider. With that said, there are still human factors to be reckoned with; after all, the hobby is about *people*. So there'll always be an issue of sexual compatibility. Having it can make an appointment more enjoyable, and is likely the reason why hobbyists return.
-- Modified on 7/8/2015 11:37:10 AM
As you well know, many dudes here want the gal gazing into his eye, kissing like long lost lovers, etc but want that "connection" to remain after the date through emails, texts, etc.
Most girls can handle all that, pending his other behavior and will tolerate a lot that nonsense. The problem comes in when she doesn't return his text fast enough, cancels a date, etc.
A connection for me is a girl that is compatible personality wise to a degree, whose menu is agreeable to my tastes/likes and who isn't a freak about the clock. That's really it.
I don't need anything else. I don't need the fake orgasms, I don't need any "connection" or contact between dates, etc.
If it comes from the girl, like it does many times, no problem. That can be fun at times.
But I dont seek anything deeper, I don't get confused about her GFE qualities to assume she is "into me" and I don't want a "relationship" with a hooker.
Some dudes can handle that, I cant.
A willingness to negotiate. lol
As far as I am concerned, as long as the lady is hot, and can convince me that she wouldn't rather be out having dental work rather than being with me. That's enough connection for me for an hour or so
That was a given. I didn't think I had to mention it in every post.
But maybe I should?
I don't want to let anyone down. LOL
Not the one hour first meetings....but those special multi-hour dates are always negotiated.
When I get dental work..I always get nitrous. Makes life fun.
As far as I am concerned, as long as the lady is hot, and can convince me that she wouldn't rather be out having dental work rather than being with me. That's enough connection for me for an hour or so
There are reatail and wholesale prices. When you book multi-hour you are buying wholesale. When did you last time make multi-hour appointment?
I guess you are suggesting that when a gal posts a multi-hour rate that is a version of wholesale. Not really the case as it is still a much higher rate than guys who get what this is about would ever pay.
So.....when a gal posts her rate it's open to playing "Let's make a deal". There are a few here (guys) that publicly proclaim they would never ever ask a hooker about a deal (on a multi-hour)...but those same guys admit they really do elsewhere.
Hell...this is a game for the buyers here. Knowing how to play the game is the key. As for multi-hours...that's all I ever do. Tried the one hour gigs...don't really interest me. Generally I prefer the 2 hour BCD and then the OTC lunch/drinks/dinner. I like to make that "connection" 
I personally don't give a F*CK what they want to do. What I know is that my rate is reasonable ( + trips to Greece) without surcharge, that I am good and fun person and that I have good feedback. That is enough for me to stay where I am. There are people who think that sex should be free at all. But from beginning of civilization it never was free. I do however realize that now it is buyer market, however my word in this market is not the last. Xo
It's the companionship that costs money
I just call them like I see them. Others tend to want to see things with rose colored glasses.
My opinions tend to piss off people. That's life.
Elena when embarking on the subject of negotiating, the question is that the provider has a floor and the hobbyist has a ceiling. What types of barter and exchange would you consider from a client who is interested in seeing you? Also would you also offer wholesale prices to those who would like to buy sessions in bulk? If so how do you arrange your schedule and how would you accept payment so that it is ammenable to all parties involved?
First of all, good escort structures her fees already with discount in mind. Let's say an hour is $500, then two hours is $900, three hours is $1300. If a guy wants to buy something that costs $500 for $200, he's better get lost. Let's say one poor person accumulated $400 while I charge $500 ( I charge $400 BTW) and says that he wants to meet me, but only has $400.
I'll accept such appointment because person honestly explained to me his situation.
If someone wants to buy from me in bulk, it is always better first to book an hour session and see how it worked. If chemistry was there, if we clicked. Then, if he wants to see me 4 times a month, special rate could be established.
As for my schedule, I have plenty of time, so no bank runs are envisioned. I am not fractural reserve system, I am the one and the whole. Xo
Elena, what I was saying was with compensation would you accept payment in bulk say on the first of each month if he had a monthly arrangement or if you trusted the person on the 1st and the 15th of the month? Not that it had anything to do with bank runs but how you would accept your compensation.
It was times in my life when the person just handed me $5000 for a week in Hamptons with no sex at all. This was fun. He didn't ask me how much I want or anything, just handed me cash in the beggining. And boy, he got some other expences as well: food, lodging, rides on hourses backs, hiking. This was fun. No complain. And he was a nice guy too. Xo
I'm a lot like you. I don't mistake GFE actions for indicators of romantic interest. It's strictly her way of giving good service and maybe showing her comfort level with me. I don't think it's reasonable for me to expect her to treat me like a long-lost lover. Maybe like a friend with benefits, but I draw the line there. My idea of a connection is saying hello at the M&G's and maybe an occasional "come up and see me sometime" e-mail. (Although the latter can become a problem if I find a civvie girlfriend.)
-- Modified on 7/8/2015 12:08:14 PM
neither of those will sleep with a bum, financially insecure person. An escort just be more quick to adjust to your personality, since she services you. A civvie can be real borring telling you love stories from the movies. From what I see, you need a relationship with a hooker.
Maybe you are right. Maybe I do need a relationship with a hooker. What good are all these civie women anyway?
So what are you qualifications to be Jack Dunphy's relationship hooker?
Most of them exist only for turnaround of cash flow. There are gems, indeed, but very scarce. Well, we need to know your location, after that to buy a plane ticket to visit me. How else?
Jack doesn't pay for plane tickets. LOL
Don't be too disappointed though.
This was the longest hooker relationship I ever had!
Meeting new people is always a great thing, but meeting them and having the connection is better that way you have that bursting desire to get downn and dirty with one another and continue to do it in the future.
I can totally understand what you mean, but the problem with the word "connection" is that it's become watered down through misuse in the civvie dating world. Far too often, it's a code word for "he's too ugly" or "he's not exciting enough", or conversely, "her breasts are too small". So some people develop a knee-jerk aversion to it. While the hobby has little in common with dating (or maybe more than we like to think), language affects thought pervasively, including our preferences in who we choose to see.
It takes a lot of time and money; and it is hard to at first see and quantify. As others have said, it is mostly in her kisses, and I have to totally agree with that.
About her caring, that is her business
If I just wanted sex I would still be picking up streetwalkers on Kuhio.
However I agree with Jack and GaG on connection. Even if she's acting, I want to feel like for that hour or two that she actually is happy to be with me, and she is having fun too. I definitely want the girlfriend experience, but I'm not looking for a girlfriend.
I don't really know what each person means by "connection," but I prefer dates starting at 2 hours. That means that in addition to sex, there will be talking, because as the song goes "I ain't the man I once was." Lol! When my big head is thinking "oh shit, this lady has no clue what I am talking about" or I if lose interest in what she has to say, I know there is no connection, not for me. As long as that does not carry over into the physical activities, I am fine with it, but I can't say that those are my best times, I like to enjoy the entire experience of being with someone else.
If we are both engaged, if I get the feeling that we would be talking with each other in a setting that did not involve laying down naked on the bed, then I know there is a connection, we are simply enjoying each other as people. If I can make her smile and laugh the way that I do with people in my regular life, I know there is a connection of some sort. If based on the interaction I feel that I can be unguarded, I know there is a connection. Hard to pin down but I know it when I feel it.
It is interesting, because I read the comments about a lady here or there being "mechanical" and the reality is that if there is no connection for me on a human level, I can be mechanical too. I would assume that this applies to most of us to some extent.
Connection for her? When they get $$$$$$$$$$$$$
Connection for us? When we come in their mouth.
into it's most basic format? I know I do. I like the way you put it.
"The art of mutual seduction" oldergentlemanMD | 7/4/2015 5:24:04 PM
Kind of a lost art. Does anybody practice that anymore?
"Different: Mind-reading or mind-meld" impposter | 7/5/2015 at 11:20:47 AM
No one wants an overly attached girlfriend. They want a night of entertainment with a happy ending. It is all about entertainment.
I personally have met people who didn't have an emotional attachment, haven't fallen in love with any clients, but we have laughed our asses off during a date, and that's usually the stuff I don't forget.
And as old timer says, which I agree with, the cash sets the stage. It does activate something in me I can't explain. Money changes everything. And I naturally become a different person once the guy enters the room and the cash is laid down.. It's like a spell lol.
Anyone else experienced that?
-- Modified on 7/8/2015 7:27:31 PM
+1..
The things I find unattractive. I have the unfortunate trait of being very visual and visual matters to me 100%. It can make or break whether I am aroused of not. Not something I can change or even want to.
The money puts blinders on or a mask if you will.
In reality my job is so much more to my clients than a couple of holes to fill. I was sitting here thinking about this job and why I do it if I am not attracted to the guys and if the sex is non fulfilling. Well first, the sex does not have to be fulfilling for me, I am not paying for that service. And a woman can perform without being attracted to her partner.
I love the money first and foremost and I have a talent that has absolutely nothing to do with sex, it has more to do with the human condition. The types of guys I see, see me for way more than the sexual release and that is not only my take but it has been verbalized over and over. I am more like a shrink/confident who has sex with them, the primary reason for the visit is not the sex but whatever else I bring to the table that they need. Now that is a VERY powerful and thrilling thing. Add that to the money aspect and wow, what a rush.
It goes to show not all johns are here for the 7 positions, as many pops in the time they can get and to plug every orifice a woman has. Some guys understand that the way they hobby is not the be and end all and that there are many different reasons why a both sides participate. That is evident on this board as well as ample evidence that some are just too ignornant to get out of their own way regarding the whys that either side participates in this.
Mine goes a little differently. I am the creative type, and I think a lot. I love cracking jokes, teasing the guy, being his friend, and entertaining. And then doing whatever I can to surprise him with certain skills.
I want him to leave thinking, "wtf was that?! That was the most fun I've had in a long time."
That's why I think it's good for guys to see different girls, depending on his needs. If he just wants to blow off testosterone for a bit and not think, there are great girls for that. If he needs a confidant to talk about his life, there's girls like you. If he wants to laugh and have a good time with a good looking chick, then get off there's me.
I believe strongly in the power of humor. When I'm in a shitty mood, I look up comedy skits, funny memes, or go out with a friend that makes me laugh. Entertaining people and encouraging them not to take things so seriously gives me a huge rush.
The money I ask, no tip, no less than I ask, makes me feel like we are both being fair. Then I'm happy and can be all he needs. If its a haggler, I don't have the power money gives me.
Also - when a guy gives me cash, it puts a certain impression of "class" that actually turns me on. It just makes me think, "yes. This is a man." Lol.
About attractiveness. Maybe since I hit 30, my desires changed for what a guy looks like, age, etc. And I have certain fetishes myself for certain body types.
If someone asked me, "would you see a guy that looks like this or that?" I guess I don't know how to answer that question, because once the cash is down, and the time begins, I just go for it. And that may be the "spell" I'm talking about.
I remember my first client in this business (as an actual escort,)I was thinking, "how am I going to do this?" He laid down the cash, and something changed in me.
The only thing cash does not cover is a bad, demeaning attitude. That is just one thing I can't stand, and I have been fortunate to screen that out via the first email. Sure, they have a "right" due to payment, but they should pick a girl who likes that stuff. I don't advertise as someone who is into that stuff.
Pay exact, be respectful, do your research, and let me do the rest.
And just an FYI more guys have gotten me off here than any in civvy life. I don't think I've ever had an O before I started this.
So there's something about the money lol.
I crack up when I see a hooker who bloviates that she's actually a "therapist" LOL
I tend to lump those gals in the "WTF are you still doing here" category. They just can't be honest with themselves and need to lie about what is really going on...and why some john called them in the first place.
Thanks for your honest answer sweetie.
I want him to leave thinking, "wtf was that?! That was the most fun I've had in a long time."
That's why I think it's good for guys to see different girls, depending on his needs. If he just wants to blow off testosterone for a bit and not think, there are great girls for that. If he needs a confidant to talk about his life, there's girls like you. If he wants to laugh and have a good time with a good looking chick, then get off there's me.
I believe strongly in the power of humor. When I'm in a shitty mood, I look up comedy skits, funny memes, or go out with a friend that makes me laugh. Entertaining people and encouraging them not to take things so seriously gives me a huge rush.
The money I ask, no tip, no less than I ask, makes me feel like we are both being fair. Then I'm happy and can be all he needs. If its a haggler, I don't have the power money gives me.
Also - when a guy gives me cash, it puts a certain impression of "class" that actually turns me on. It just makes me think, "yes. This is a man." Lol.
About attractiveness. Maybe since I hit 30, my desires changed for what a guy looks like, age, etc. And I have certain fetishes myself for certain body types.
If someone asked me, "would you see a guy that looks like this or that?" I guess I don't know how to answer that question, because once the cash is down, and the time begins, I just go for it. And that may be the "spell" I'm talking about.
I remember my first client in this business (as an actual escort,)I was thinking, "how am I going to do this?" He laid down the cash, and something changed in me.
The only thing cash does not cover is a bad, demeaning attitude. That is just one thing I can't stand, and I have been fortunate to screen that out via the first email. Sure, they have a "right" due to payment, but they should pick a girl who likes that stuff. I don't advertise as someone who is into that stuff.
Pay exact, be respectful, do your research, and let me do the rest.
And just an FYI more guys have gotten me off here than any in civvy life. I don't think I've ever had an O before I started this.
So there's something about the money lol.
…know how to find that something that they like about you because they are comfortable in their own skin and like what they do. (They realize that we’re all human and fulfilling human needs is a natural act; no shame.) As a client, learn how to pick up the signs and go with the flow and stop being so full of doubt, so full of insecurity; in the long run you’re wasting you life focusing on what does not make life worth living.
If you come across someone you don’t click with, but you’re confident,then losing the donation may be the biggest loss, but you can always make more money in the future, so it becomes a minor setback.
(Easier said then done sometimes, but who’s going to believe in you except you!)
Personally, I love great sex and an emotional connection makes it all the better. I have to say this though, one of the sessions I had with a woman made me feel sort of odd because I was more emotionally drawn to her than I sexually (Although she was also an attractive woman and a good lover). After I left, I put it into perspective; she knew how to treat people; she knew how to say good words and be positive towards them. If you return the same; it’s golden