TER General Board

From a former SB
EveKane See my TER Reviews 512 reads
posted

I've found the relationship between escort and client just so much easier then that of SB/SD. In my case it was usually the SD who got to emotionally involved, demanding more and more time and emotional energy I just wasn't willing to give. Wanting monogamy (on my end only) and all my attention to be directed to him. I'll stick with my clients who know exactly what our relationship is without all the messy emotions getting involved. Making friends is always ok but demanding I not see other people. Nope, not gonna happen Daddy.

Never.Landed1235 reads

And it's fresh on everyone's mind, I would like to ask a few questions.  

In my experience, SB's know all of SD's personal information. However, none of those relationships budded from an online dating site like this or SA or whatever. Is this the general consensus, no matter how you meet? If so, why is there so much blowback when an escort declines to see anonymous strangers? One website recently reneged an offer at a top advertising spot because of the way the woman screened, and yet, these inexperienced professionals in denial just have to post a cute face pic on sugars-r-us.com and you trust them?

I hear that a woman going bat shitters as an excuse a lot on here. But... when you look at it, who do you really think is more likely to be upset when you stop seeing them? A college girl who needs your money, or a professional who is counting on you to come and go? Who is really more likely to call your wife? Brittany, who you promised you'd get an apartment but won't now? Or Brandy, who can't remember who the fuck you even are without all kinds of information to jog her memory? lol

Then there's the LE risk. Valid fear, I think. But do you have to be convinced the sky is falling to think that places like Seeking Arrangements are going to quickly come under scrutiny as well? Laws could change and thousands could be at minimum questioned in a single day. I don't get the impression that these websites invest in the same security features, or so carefully navigate legal waters at the moment as industry specific ones do. Things are changing rapidly on the provider business side of things, and who knows where the flood will go next. How long until the law stops giving "sugar baby" the slide on being cute for "prostitute" like they did "escort", or "companion" or "gfe"?

Your thoughts, if any

Sugars don't have to uphold the same level of discretion that escorts do because they have no online rep to protect that could cost them money if they out someone... do the math. It's a lot easier to blackmail a guy who can't touch you vs. one who can. I have had some very successful SD/SB relationships and most started as client/escort dates, then we worked out a more economical way of seeing each other. The thing is, most SDs want 4 times the amount of sex for a fourth of the money, and many SBs also like to take advantage calling for stupid shit all the time without seeing the SD... there has to be an agreement and some boundaries set for this to work.  

Posted By: Never.Landed
And it's fresh on everyone's mind, I would like to ask a few questions.  
   
 In my experience, SB's know all of SD's personal information. However, none of those relationships budded from an online dating site like this or SA or whatever. Is this the general consensus, no matter how you meet? If so, why is there so much blowback when an escort declines to see anonymous strangers? One website recently reneged an offer at a top advertising spot because of the way the woman screened, and yet, these inexperienced professionals in denial just have to post a cute face pic on sugars-r-us.com and you trust them?  
   
 I hear that a woman going bat shitters as an excuse a lot on here. But... when you look at it, who do you really think is more likely to be upset when you stop seeing them? A college girl who needs your money, or a professional who is counting on you to come and go? Who is really more likely to call your wife? Brittany, who you promised you'd get an apartment but won't now? Or Brandy, who can't remember who the fuck you even are without all kinds of information to jog her memory? lol  
   
 Then there's the LE risk. Valid fear, I think. But do you have to be convinced the sky is falling to think that places like Seeking Arrangements are going to quickly come under scrutiny as well? Laws could change and thousands could be at minimum questioned in a single day. I don't get the impression that these websites invest in the same security features, or so carefully navigate legal waters at the moment as industry specific ones do. Things are changing rapidly on the provider business side of things, and who knows where the flood will go next. How long until the law stops giving "sugar baby" the slide on being cute for "prostitute" like they did "escort", or "companion" or "gfe"?  
   
 Your thoughts, if any?  
 

Never.Landed543 reads

All this post has done is make the sadist in me want to be a SB, and the realist in me even more confused as to why a guy would go with a SB instead of an escort.

(Nobody worry, the sadist in me also insists you pay first)

...I personally never bother with sites like SA. I found my kittens thru other sources. And my kittens did not have much personal info about me- only what I chose to share with them. Most of my SM/SB arrangements ended on somewhat sour notes, usually with the kittens starting to take me for granted or she started to become too attached so I had to cut bait and sail away. Thankfully none went BSC on me, nor me on them.

Bottom line for me, at least is for now, to stick with escorts & strippers. Keeps things much simpler. ;)

Never.Landed410 reads

And I'm glad you've been in this arrangement as a woman, because I've had experience that border on the sugar momma role as well. Definitely not dating, but I did like taking care of them. Over time the lack of competition led to a lack of interest in keeping me around. Which, being a working girl who moonlights as a SB every once in a while, was weird to me. I didn't have that perspective anymore, where I didn't understand just how easy the arrangement was to end. Luckily there was always someone to conveniently come around and take them off my hands when things started heading south, but it does make me wonder how things would have gone had that not happened.  

Which made me wonder about the pervs on here, which led to this, lol

you're traveling together otherwise you're an imbecile. Traveling together is also dangerous because there is a sharing of personal info. It really takes the right SB/SD arrangement to risk much of what can happen esp if you're a married or corporate guy. OTH giving pros your personal info is just plain fucked up. Its bad enough they can get your data thru the hotel where you might meet. Bottom line you don't want a call at home that someone is prego diseased or whatever.
This isn't a hobby but truly risky business.

Never.Landed427 reads

And if all you give them is the same information you give a pro (phone number, email, first name, location info I'm assuming?), can the sugar babies not do the same damage anyways?

And who is really more likely to call and say they're pregnant or diseased?

ask a certain 200 reviews pro in LV how quickly she flipped and to THE man
Further many pros began trafficked, pimped "agencied" and
they and their BFs / GFs may have serious drug, alco and gambling
issues. So you tell me smart girl

Don't know where you get that idea from....

I knew all of my SDs real info. on the first meeting to discuss said relationship.... some before that as escort clients. I really don't know why any woman would want to blackmail the hand that feeds her, as that would mean keeping his ass around a long time and for what? I can make more money by the date as LR, than being a SB... blackmail or not.  I really can't be with the same man/woman for more than six months, so that would never pan out for me lol

Who said anything about blackmail? I've experienced that attempt from a provider and her gang and it didn't end well for them. Furthermore we have laws against that and extortion. Did you forget to mention the little black book most of you ladies keep to sell when your time is up or you move on to other areas of the business? If I fuck you and you get pregnant, from one of the 20 other guys you see a week I'm not at all concerned or a concern. But if my SB gets pregnant, hmm you tell me?!

Fucking street walkers. They don't want any info, they are not interested in contacting you after the fact because you really are anonymous - no hoops to jump through, no blackmail, no texts, no calls, no little black books, no gangs just an exchange of body fluids for cash.

I guess in your case, you played it another way. But, you would have still been considered an escort CLIENT if that was the case, not a SD. I am not going to fk some dude at a high discount without knowing who the hell he is... I suppose your naive SBs, did. And yes, there are laws against everything... you planning on telling your wife you're being blackmailed if that is the case? I agree, it's much easier with a SB for that to happen than a provider. Um, did you not say you don't give out your info? How did a 'provider and her gang' try to hurt you, if that is the case? Pregnancy? Are you sleeping around without a condom?  I have been a hooker for nearly 7 years and never got pregnant, so not sure why you would assume it's that easy when you both use condoms and are on the pill/shot. Did I use a condom with all of my SDs? No, but I still had two other forms of BC when that was taking place. Who would want a baby for some client... escort or SD? Needy or desperate, I suppose.  

Posted By: jc316
Who said anything about blackmail? I've experienced that attempt from a provider and her gang and it didn't end well for them. Furthermore we have laws against that and extortion. Did you forget to mention the little black book most of you ladies keep to sell when your time is up or you move on to other areas of the business? If I fuck you and you get pregnant, from one of the 20 other guys you see a week I'm not at all concerned or a concern. But if my SB gets pregnant, hmm you tell me?!
-- Modified on 7/3/2015 11:30:41 AM

I completely agree that a SB is a much greater source of danger for a guy.   My issue with providing full information has to do with how that information is kept.  Will my name be on the phone?  The computer?  A diary?  If so, what happens when a provider's SO goes crazy for some reason or what happens when that phone, computer or whatever falls in LE's hands?   Not that I am worried about LE coming after me long after the deed has been done, but LE reaching out to me simply to ask questions would be devastating to my personal and professional life.    

I particularly like this line:  "Or Brandy, who can't remember who the fuck you even are without all kinds of information to jog her memory? lol"    I don't know if I replied to HT yesterday, or if I simply thought it when she made a comment about the referral system sucking because ladies don't provide enough feedback.   Crap, unless the guy was a complete asshole or unless the lady keeps a diary, how in the hell is a lady supposed to remember a guy she saw a few months ago?   I bet some of the ladies I have seen would not be able to pick me out of a line up.  Lol!

Bob.Sugar402 reads

I even autograph this for them.

Trust me, he is memorable, and that goes for the decent ones too. If a guy is pushy, I remember him years later. If a guy is rough, same deal. If a guy is clean, kind, gentle and respectful and nothing out of the ordinary tweaks my senses, then the way I reply to a reference is this....

I saw Tom 3 months ago and he was clean, well mannered,  not rough and respectful. He left on time, was not pushy and was an easy client in so far as he respected my physical limits. I would highly recommend him.

You would be surprised at what we actually do remember about a guy we have seen once. One comes to mind and he was horrible and I remember every detail and that was 8 years ago.

I've found the relationship between escort and client just so much easier then that of SB/SD. In my case it was usually the SD who got to emotionally involved, demanding more and more time and emotional energy I just wasn't willing to give. Wanting monogamy (on my end only) and all my attention to be directed to him. I'll stick with my clients who know exactly what our relationship is without all the messy emotions getting involved. Making friends is always ok but demanding I not see other people. Nope, not gonna happen Daddy.

Posted By: EveKane
I've found the relationship between escort and client just so much easier then that of SB/SD. In my case it was usually the SD who got to emotionally involved, demanding more and more time and emotional energy I just wasn't willing to give. Wanting monogamy (on my end only) and all my attention to be directed to him. I'll stick with my clients who know exactly what our relationship is without all the messy emotions getting involved. Making friends is always ok but demanding I not see other people. Nope, not gonna happen Daddy.
Same here, been there and done that. The guys who like the SD/SB thing are frequently only enjoying it as long as they run into dumb new women who don't know how it works. It's not cheaper if it's done the way it's supposed to be and there's a lot more emotional strings involved (typically on his end). It's not to get the most of out someone while paying the least. You do it because you want to spoil a woman and have more intimacy and have a stable schedule with someone you have a relationship with, etc. Any woman who thinks she is an SB and is taking money per date or not getting all the personal information up front...is just plain dumb and confused.  

In my experience, which is direct experience...it doesn't take long for an SD to feel entitled to all your time and energy when they are not usually giving it back. You can be asked to be exclusive when they aren't and that's just plain not fair and not fun. I'll stick to situations where everyone can be clear about what's going on.  
Also, the idea that an SB needs to be attracted to her SD is bull (or that she'll hold out for one)...even if you think they are, they are not, it's just what level of tolerance you have for a person. I screen clients for chemistry just like people say SB's do. And that's for chemistry, not physical attraction (it only comes to play in a minute sense)..so it's not like you're more likely to find someone who honestly digs you with the SD/SB route....it's the same odds as with an escort.  
Most of the women doing the SB route need money, so they will do what they want to get it, they are just hookers by another name. They wouldn't be doing it if they were not strapped for cash, no matter what line they may tell someone. It's not fun unless you have a very generous partner to do it.

Now an escort who turns into a SB...she typically knows what it's about and how to do it correctly. She also doesn't have as much need for immediate money so she will go about it more carefully and make a better partner for the relationship than some silly college girl.  

But whatever, it's not like men don't always try to make the most of silly stupid girls all around, lol.

LasVegan406 reads

would make an amazing SB.......send me your info and I will have a plane ticket and the first six months of your rent paid for up front.  We can discuss both of our ongoing requirements after I deposit 5000 in your paypal account.

I think there are.... Many....

HAPPY 4th of July Weekend Ter peeps!!!  
Xoxo
GC

This topic raises again the truth that people involved at some level and on either side of the "hobby" broadly defined (a silly term but it conveys the meaning I want so wth) are seeking and are happy with different things. The most important thing is to have clarity, both in making an honest self-assessment as well as from the person (whether provider or client) with whom you are interacting. If you're thinking about a real SD/SB relationship (on either side), in my experience the heart of it is an ongoing, structured, stable, intimate (both physically and emotionally) relationship that goes beyond specific P4P sessions, with the SD wanting to pamper and be generous to the SB, and be more committed to her specifically, and the SB providing more ongoing emotional connections and intimacy. If you're a guy and just want to get laid, don't bother. It's not a way to get discounts. Indeed, I think in a serious SD/SB relationship the SD would spend much, much more than a per-session calculation would suggest. But the guy who does want a real SD/SB does want the extra intimacy and if he finds the right lady it's well worth it, IMHO.  Mostly -- be honest with yourself and with the other person. No need to judge each other just because we want different things, as long as we're honest about it.

I think that the SD/SB relationships can most certainly work; however, people need to have the "right reasons" as someone stated above if you are a guy just looking to get laid then no it won't work. I was an SB for about 3 years before becoming a provider and I will say that many times men attempted to take advantage of my youth. Empty promises are the worst---especially if a gentleman has a sense of entitlement. Being an SB is tiring and I'm sure being an SD is tiring as well because it's a real affair as opposed to a tryst or rendezvous and emotions can often make the most sane young woman go BSC.  

The hobbyist/provider relationship seems much more organic and less forced because all expectations (if any) are laid out on the table and rarely are strong emotions involved. But that's just my 2 cents...

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