They think girls love the way they smell because some girl back in high school told them they have sexy pheromones the 3 Ss taught in the military, Shit, Shower, & Shave are supposed to be done in that order, but guys get confused and since they are simpletons ... they don't wash their ass properly.
As a provider, I know the importance of being deliciously fresh, clean, and appealing when I meet with a client. Most people do not want to spend time with, let alone money on, a woman who's anything but clean and well cared for. Also: water- wet, Pope- Catholic.
So why, why, WHY are there clients who don't feel that the same applies to them? Now, I'll be honest, I've only encountered a less-than-fresh client twice. But I've been reading more and more articles and blog posts by providers who regularly have to deal with all manner of ickiness, and it's utterly baffling to me.
Providers-- How often do you find yourself with a client who's personal hygiene is less than stellar? How do you handle it?
Hobbyists-- What's your routine for getting ready for playtime? Do you think you hold yourself to the same standards that you expect of your provider
If you're not clean you're not going to get her best service. So I make sure I'm well groomed in every way. I'd rather not go into detail but it's all pretty obvious stuff.
and anyone who needs details or instruction isn't reading this anway so it's pointless to elaborate. I will say that once upon a time my cover story was going for a morning run and I showed up a sweaty mess; I tried to jump in the shower but she wasn't having it, and I have to say getting right to it was pretty hot. Guess there is something to be said for man smell, provided it's the right kind.
If you want your "Nut Sack Licked-Wash Your Nut Sack" ! That goes for everything else !
I cannot imagine what some gals are confronted with-yuk !
I recall vividly a few years ago flying from LAX to Atlanta-in first class-with a German fellow sitting beside me - dressed extremely well-who smelled like a damn goat and had the breath of a frikkin' camel ! Makes me want to heave as I think about it !!!
....I will also shower when arriving at her incall.
Guaranteed freshness!
I'd enjoy having a drink with you and discussing the finer things in life, like the women we fuck.
It's really cool, your perspective.
I think the reason for this is most often the result of the human element. We human beings, sadly, are unable to see ourselves as others do.
A less common, but possible reason for this..........and I have read it in the tone of hobbyist posts.........I am paying for this so it shouldn't matter........."by God, man.........we are paying THEM!"
But........there are some of us who truly see our sessions as a date.......with the possibility of having a memorable time, of course for a short period of time and maybe never again with this particular provider. But........again.......this is what I do to prepare........for my own comfort level......and in my eyes to put my best foot forward;
1) probably the same as every hobbyist, shower and make sure I am squeaky clean, end-to-end.
2) make sure I shave and manscape (that also means end-to-end, even though a challenge sometimes), just as I would for a GF. In my particular case........I love DATY........and shaving my chin can be very important..........I shave my entire face in every direction possible and then see how it would feel against a lady's MOST intimate parts.
3) make sure I have the perfect, manly/macho, manicure/pedicure I can. No nail polish......yuck......but perfectly manicured (cut and filed) nails.........just as if I were about to attend a business meeting.
4) I also make sure my hands, while masculine, are not rough, there are many hand creme products on the market for men.
5) although quite average in looks, my naturally pearly white teeth and my oral hygiene, often receive positive comments.
Yes, I am paying, but based upon MY own criteria.......I want this to be as enjoyable as possible......and making a provider uncomfortable does not add to the experience, for me. By the way, I have never been with a provider who refused to DFK me, in spite of my average looks.
You ought to write a pamphlet! We providers can print them and hand them out to less mindful clients when we visit... along with a complimentary Altoid and a bar of soap lol.
Sounds like a perfect routine to me 
Unfortunately the guys that don't will never think that you are talking about THEM.
Honestly, if a fifty year old man hasn't learned to wash his skankin ass by now, do you really think that after his mother, girl friend, wife et al has tried to beat hygiene into his thick head, that he is really going to listen to any of us on this subject.
Good point. It doesn't help that in the interest of not ruining the mood, I'm bet a lot of providers aren't nearly as direct as they should be in order to get the point across. Creative solutions like the one I employed ("Hey... how about a nice, sexy shower to start? Think you can wash my back?" ::cue doe eyes:: ) may get the job done, but they don't fix the underlying problem-- a complete lack of self awareness.
-- Modified on 6/18/2015 12:27:30 PM
The first thing a K girl usually does after greeting you at the door, besides giving you a welcoming kiss that is (I assume as long as you don't have funk breath) is to get you undressed and immediately guided to the shower, whether you last showered in the last five minutes or the last five days. You are then presented with a "mouthwash cocktail" for both of you to enjoy followed by her scrubbing you clean from head to toe, with a lot of time spent in the middle.
It's only after this little ritual is finished that the real fun begins. I usually try to shower right before leaving for my appointment, but I would never dream of refusing a shower when offered like this. Both of you can be 100% confident that the other is squeaky clean, and since they do this with everybody, those guys with hygiene issues don't feel singled out.
I will agree it doesn't fix the underlying, lack of self awareness problem, but it does solve the "damn you smell nasty" problem. lol
Ava, now you know why London hires a chief cock and ball washer. That is why she charges so much.
-- Modified on 6/18/2015 12:27:30 PM
I ALWAYS take a shower, usually a double shower , within an hour of my appointment time.
It's more than important to me to be extremely clean and I expect it from the provider I'm seeing as well.
Use soap AND a washcloth! Wash your nuts and your ass. I think most smelly people forget this important part. Wash, rinse, repeat. Dry off completely with a CLEAN towel. Brush your teeth twice, use mouth wash .... Shave close.
So why, why, WHY are there clients who don't feel that the same applies to them? Now, I'll be honest, I've only encountered a less-than-fresh client twice. But I've been reading more and more articles and blog posts by providers who regularly have to deal with all manner of ickiness, and it's utterly baffling to me.
Providers-- How often do you find yourself with a client who's personal hygiene is less than stellar? How do you handle it?
Hobbyists-- What's your routine for getting ready for playtime? Do you think you hold yourself to the same standards that you expect of your provider?
Great point! And so true...may I please add, those who are un-circumcised, PULL THAT SKIN DOWN and wash underneath! If I want cheese, I'll go to Whole Foods!
EEeeewww Dick cheese
I always shower upon arrival and honestly would be mortified to bring dirty junk to the party. I expect the same courtesy from the gals. A noseful of stank for me is a total boner killer.
I imagine there's a segment of mouthbreathing assholes that get off on intentionally presenting a smelly package and ass to women.
To think I've read of providers having clients leave skid marks on the sheets is appalling. Disgusting!
That may honestly be the most disgusting thing I've read all day... And that's saying something lol.
OMFG that's horrible.
Sadly, I also believe that many guys deliberately make themselves as disgusting as possible before visiting a sex worker. I often smell guys overpowering BO while sitting near them in stripclubs, and I can't help but wonder what dancer in her right mind would ever approach them.
That is just sad commentary. Why would any guy think that it is acceptable not to be freshly showered is beyond comprehension.
They think girls love the way they smell because some girl back in high school told them they have sexy pheromones the 3 Ss taught in the military, Shit, Shower, & Shave are supposed to be done in that order, but guys get confused and since they are simpletons ... they don't wash their ass properly.
I like a little man smell. Men are men. They aren't supposed to smell like flowers. That being said- I'm ok if he's someone im attracted to chemically, and say we meet for lunch and he hasn't showered since the morning. That's OK. But if he's someone I find unappealing in some way... any odor is revolting. But I can't say I remember ever smelling someone disgusting.
OH! I once saw a French guy in Houston. NO DEODORANT!!!! He even showered but by the time we left our hotel the room was eau d'funk. Then we went to watch the rockets and I had to sit in the car with him for an hour! How do you tell a French man to put on deodorant? I just couldnt... 
-- Modified on 6/18/2015 10:39:10 AM
guess it depends on the chemistry, but there was one MP gal in particular I used to see at the end of the workday when we were both kind of funky smelling, but we got off on it and loved to lick each other's bodies.
Good times
But we are "gross" because they use a bidet after using the toilet ... we just shower after (hopefully)
How do you tell a French man to put on deodorant? "HEY! Pepé Le Pew - YOU SMELL LIKE ASS!"
-- Modified on 6/18/2015 3:17:49 PM
-- Modified on 6/18/2015 3:21:43 PM
In addition to being squeaky clean, manicured nails, clean shaven and minty breath do any of the guys or gals have any comments on commercial pheromones? Do the work?
-- Modified on 6/18/2015 9:53:52 AM
Amazon 17% rate them one star, "Smells exactly like tea tree oil and doesn't do anything."
was one ... shit's expensive too.
Speaking for myself, I believe its paramount to practice good personal hygiene. If I'm heading out to meet her, I time it so that depart just minutes after I finish getting ready. If she's coming to me, same rule applies.
I also make it a point to give her the courtesy to freshen up both before and afterwards if she's coming to me.
I always plan my sessions with time off from work so I will truly enjoy it. I do get ready before the meeting to make sure that I am freshly shower & well groom and clean clothes. Depending on the weather, I sometimes take a quick rinse when I get to the incall if it was humid and 95 degrees outside. I would not want to show up to a lady all sweaty or with a bad breathe. The sweaty part might come later if it was a great session (haha).
Common sense guys, treat the lady how you want to be treated.....
This reminds me of that old routine by Redd Foxx, you can find it on Youtube.. lol
In response to all the surprised posters about why any hobbyist would be on the losing end of a Mr. Clean competition;
1) the human element...........sadly we humans can not see ourselves as others do..........that is why we must constantly be aware of this issue.
2) as so articulately stated by some of my fellow posters............some hobbyists simply do not care and feel since they are paying, they can be as ignorant, rude, and inconsiderate as they please.
Sad commentary but true.
I have a very nice review from a gentleman who prior to our appointment had just eaten dinner and whatever he had was loaded with onions. He liked kissing, too, and it was so rude and disgusting that he didn't do anything for oral hygiene before our encounter. Please make an effort about your mouth, as well as the other parts of your body. Thanks!
I only had this problem once, and I was warned about it (from his refs) ahead of time so I knew what I was in for. I just guessed that maybe his culture wasn't one that used Deodorant, because it wasn't a down there issue but a pit issue. Personally, body odor from the pit area doesn't bother me.
Oh, wait- I am LYING! It did happen another time waaaaaaayy long ago when I first started. The guy had some crusties down there. I am guessing because he wasn't circumcised and he must've not showered first. YUCK
This is a problem. It happens several times a year. Gentlemen, when you dribble you leave pee all around your genital area after you put your penis back in your pants. The dribbles on your leg, groin, balls (and if you're fat, maybe even your stomach) leave a piss smell you may not detect from above, but when a provider's face is up close and personal, it's repulsive. First off, it's unhealthy for us to ingest. Urine carries disease like hepatitis and salmonella. But from your perspective, why would you want us to do anything other than just gobble you up!? I am embarrassed for the client when I have to stop and wash someone before I can proceed. I recently had a heavy guy who had smegma around the head of his cock.... REALLY?! I guess he can't see it to clean it. And, yes, WASH YOUR ASS. Dingleberries and ass odor are a turn off. And don't just wash the area once... wash it again after you rinse. That smell is in your skin and doesn't necessarily go away with one quick pass with a bar of soap. I don't want any of the aforementioned things in my memory banks attached to YOU. The best policy is for both of us to be straight out of the shower.
it's better than not taking one but to be clean you have to be thorough.
Several months ago, I had an older client who complained that he never got good service from providers in the past, that they all seemed to try to get him out of there as quickly as possible. What he neglected to mention was his overwhelming odor, which I discovered after I got his pants off.
After I dragged him into the shower and finished up the session, he informed me that he only changed his Depends twice a day and took a shower every other day. He said he thought that was fine, because he was retired, so there wasn't anybody he had to impress.
When I gently suggested that perhaps that might be correlated to some of the troubles he might have experienced with providers in the past, and that he might want to consider doing those things more often in the future, he seemed genuinely shocked. Apparently every other provider he had seen had been too polite to say anything. I honestly thought that being forthright with him might be helpful to him, because he didn't seem malicious, just clueless.
That was clearly the wrong choice, because he got offended enough to give me a 5-5 review, in which he mentions how "meticulous" he is about his hygiene. I think he really believed that!
Oh well. At the end of the day, I think I learned more than he did: mess with people's self-perceptions at your own peril.
So why, why, WHY are there clients who don't feel that the same applies to them? Now, I'll be honest, I've only encountered a less-than-fresh client twice. But I've been reading more and more articles and blog posts by providers who regularly have to deal with all manner of ickiness, and it's utterly baffling to me.
Providers-- How often do you find yourself with a client who's personal hygiene is less than stellar? How do you handle it?
Hobbyists-- What's your routine for getting ready for playtime? Do you think you hold yourself to the same standards that you expect of your provider?
How anyone who would rate you as a 5 for looks can't be sane. LOL
I'll second that..........maybe he asked his seeing eye dog to rate that for him. That IS what blind people do.......isn't it?
And she penalized. Seriously if the guy came over and smelled that bad I would not see him. I would bullshit my way out of the appointment (feign diarrhea, Ebola, fucking dengue fever not to touch that) and never see the nasty POS again.
And the rest of the hobby world should hear about his rancid depends and every other day shower.
Because that was on him NOT you yet you have to deal with his bitch fit with a low score...all because you would not put up with his stench.
Hope you dnsed the filthy old fart.
Especially after work. I don't mind clients coming over from a hard days work. I will have a shower waiting for them. Bad hygiene could be solved by washing the lovely man parts.
I've had clients whom stunk even after a "quick" hop in the shower... It's not like there isn't soap or body wash along with washrags provided... They aren't regulars... Thank GAWD.... It's all about presentation in life, smelling good is essential....
a client shower upon arrival. write in in caps on the rules section of your site.
he will have no reason to complain when he arrives
What I do is (2 hrs before date, not in the a.m.) soak the for a few minutes with a home made cleanser. Then shower with a bodywash soap and bath sponge. Before the fun starts I freshen up with a quick shower or hot bath towel.
I also watch my diet a few days prior to the appointment.(enough said there)
-- Modified on 6/18/2015 6:19:50 PM
I have had a guy "shower" and come out still reeking of BO. That is a whole new world of unclean right there.
In fact I fired a client a while back for BO...he was good but got lazy. He laid down and lifted his arm wanting me to lie next to him and the smell was rancid. I said, nope too hot have to sit up to cool off.
My Frenchman also laid back and tried to put his arm around me to cuddle, ie. put my face in his dripping wet pit. I was like, "Ummm... I need to go over there --->" Where? "Anywhere else!
beforehand and he still is not clean, then he showers and still is not clean. He goes home and the date is over. if you dont want to press the issue or ask him to leave then it's on you.
the reason these guys don’t learn is apparently no one tells them. If he has a history of being smelly, screening should catch it. Isn't that the purpose of it?
If all this doesn't work then you're stuck with him. The cost of doing business I guess.
Anecdotally, I've had a few ladies "not so clean". It wasn't always unbearable but one lady wouldn't shower up when I gave her a hint. Sometimes baby wipes arent enough! I never saw her again.
In fact I fired a client a while back for BO...he was good but got lazy. He laid down and lifted his arm wanting me to lie next to him and the smell was rancid. I said, nope too hot have to sit up to cool off.
Where dirty-depends-every-other-day-shower got pissed and gave her a shit review? Or they just get mad and you are alone with them. If it is that bad that my eyes are watering I feign a heart attack and get them to leave.
If they stay, I will do whatever I can to avoid too much contact and then never see them again, but telling a trick right then and there they are unhygenically sound not often bodes well for the hooker.
And screening, well unless you get a reference from a hooker that will answer that question. Most just say yeah I saw him with very little detail. The really good ones will tell you, yes and that does help a ton.
Bottom line it can be the cost of doing business if it is not too bad.
that much improved attention to personal hygiene (than at anytime before in my life) has been one of many positive outcomes from exposure to the hobby for me.
I shave my playground the night before and both bathe and shower shortly before I depart or the provider arrives at my location depending if it is incall or outcall. If it is incall and my drive is very long, I also may ask to shower upon arrival. I also pay a lot of attention to oral hygiene and have gotten the best dental checkups in my lie because of it. A use of mouthwash as late as possible before greeting is also a must for me.
The ironic thing is that all of that never even occurred to me before discovering the hobby. It has been these forums and provider posts on Twitter that have shown me the path that I should have always been following. I am sure my soon-to-be ex-wife would have appreciated it. Ha!
This question has been asked probably more than a million times. The answer is very simple. Everything you do in your adult life is largely depends on what you were taught growing up. If you were taught respect others, you will, you were taught good hygiene, you will continue with it till you die,etc.
It is useless asking why or trying to teach a grown person hygiene or anything else in that matter. If i ever encounter such a provider I will walk. Luckily, it hasn’t happened to me in over ten years of P4P.
Anyhoo. I'll still have to let my statement to your message above stand. That was some asinine shit there!
Just to keep us guessing, about one out of every 50-100 posts Senor Grumpy will actually make a post that makes perfect sense. Don't be fooled though, he will follow it up with a post even dumber than his usual low standard.
You're not the first to inform me of this today. Lol. I hear he has a rep of being negative and not making any sense a lot of times. I mean is there any worse combination in the world. Lol. I'll be easy on em as I will some others. There are some sensitive mofos on these boards. I tell ya. If you can't take what you give, I have ZERO respect for ya. Lowest of the low! You're just not a man, imo! Lol. I hate saying someone is not a man for any reason but damn Thats surely a #1 characteristic of not being one in my book. Smh!!
Be easy Kenny. I still love that song and think about it every time I see Gambler in your handle. Lol. I'm just being silly!
I'm sorry, am I to understand that you would walk out on a provider who dared to question your hygiene?
That's a whole new level of entitlement right there lol.
-- Modified on 6/18/2015 10:33:08 PM
Even after taking a shower, use a baby wipe over your hole a few times. Use your finger to stick the baby wipe in a little (like a centimeter). Repeat until the baby wipe comes out clean
If I wasn't clean and fresh I'd be so self conscious that I'd never come close to having a good time. I clip all around my cock and balls to smooth (thank goodness for the micro touch). I take usually two showers prior to a date and if at an incall I shower after the initial hug and kiss, both so she knows I'm fresh and so she has time to discretely be assured that the envelope is correct. I can't even imagine how self conscious I'd be if I couldn't shower directly before, I like having my cock sucked too much to have to be concerned about my hygiene.
I can't even imagine a guy not wanting to be fresh, nor a woman.
For the provider as well as the hobbyist. I would never subject a woman, provider or otherwise, to poor hygiene. It is also a very definite reflection of the hobbyist how he presents himself. I probably spend a good hour before each appointment cleaning myself, manscaping, making sure the hotel room doesn't look,like a frat house. I also clip my nails the night before and buff out any hangnails or sharp edges. I'm not into cologne but I do use a pleasant smelling soap along with deodorant.
If I schedule an appointment a few weeks or even a few months ahead of time I want the session to get off to a good start. Proper and meticulous hygiene is one of the singular first impressions that a provider picks up on during the first moments of a session. We all know the adage about first impressions.......