Can we hobbyists REALLY tell when our provider friend is truly enjoying herself?
Can we TRULY know when she is orgasming.
Yes, some of us men believe we know it all........AND.......sometimes it is completely obvious when she ABSOLUTELY is or ABSOLUTELY is not orgasming.
But ladies..........care to share? How often.........if ever...........does a client truly bring you to orgasm?
Thank you in advance for reading this in the tone it was meant.
Yes I usually make it a point to cum during sessions. I feel like it is only fair. It isn't very fun to leave a session with the female version of blue balls! Usually I try to finish myself first lol. But that doesn't always happen. So after he is finished, I try to get off quickly. It's a difficult task on my part, unless he is able. Usually ORAL is the best way and fast way I can cum. But then again, it all depends on the client. Someone who tries too hard and makes it obvious they are trying to get me to cum- it never works.
-- Modified on 5/28/2015 11:56:25 AM
If a woman attacks my dick and makes it plain she is trying to make me cum as quickly as possible, she is usually going to be in for a long day, as it has the exact opposite effect on me.
I try to be the same when giving oral. In my experience it's a rare woman who is going to cum from me giving her DATY in just a couple of minutes. Except for one civvie GF who could cum from anything more than a strong breeze, I am pretty certain that those ladies having all those convulsions down there after about two minutes are ALL faking it. OTOH, if I think woman is truly enjoying herself, AND if I am seriously attracted to her in the looks department, I don't mind at all going slowly, knowing eventually we will get there. lol
Wow, Alissa, I admire your candor & effort.
I always feel that it's unfair to expect a provider to have real O because she has to deal with so many guys, not on an emotional level. However, once in a while when the impromptu happens, it's a big bonus. Ya, things have to be natural, for both sides.
Too bad you're in Illinois, otherwise I'd be the 1st to line up.
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I can't help it, it feels good. But releasing is an entirely different thing. Takes me a while to get my wits back so edging is what I do to keep the focus of the session on you!
Now, 3 out of 5 dates I actually have an orgasm. And, the guy does not have to be the least bit attractive for that to happen... I can just get off based on how he is down there, his method of build up and how clean he is from mouth to balls lol. Nothing turns me off more than bad breath... sorry guys, but brushing your teeth before you arrive then drinking wine and eating cheese does not exactly work. GUM please!
Eeeewwwww Cheese Breath!
Over in some other thread there was a guy talking about how he didn't think any lady could really enjoy receiving oral sex from him because he was 64 years old and past his prime. I thought, "say what?" If you do a good job, why not? She can just close her eyes and doesn't even have to look at you
unless maybe you can do a Vulcan mind-meld with the gal.
All I know is that the gals I'm with very often appear to be having orgasms, that make me one very happy camper.
Whether they really are, or are earning an Oscar nomination is irrelevant to me.
But honestly, as long as she's a good actress and makes me believe it then I'm happy. It would be nice if every provider could get off, for them. But I can certainly understand why they can't, just lie to me.
It's harder to tell on the first few times unless she is a gusher, squirter etc. Once you know the signs of someone's real O, hard to fake. I laugh like crazy after an orgasm orally.... just can't help it. RARELY will I cum during sex, especially in the hobby because the condom messes it up for me.
but rather how it's being used that messes it up for you.
It's harder to tell on the first few times unless she is a gusher, squirter etc. Once you know the signs of someone's real O, hard to fake. I laugh like crazy after an orgasm orally.... just can't help it. RARELY will I cum during sex, especially in the hobby because the condom messes it up for me.
Also, nice seeing you around LR, hopefully you're doing well in FL :
I think you may have to see Udo if condoms mess itup for you . ..
It's harder to tell on the first few times unless she is a gusher, squirter etc. Once you know the signs of someone's real O, hard to fake. I laugh like crazy after an orgasm orally.... just can't help it. RARELY will I cum during sex, especially in the hobby because the condom messes it up for me.
Let's be honest here, the escort is there for your own enjoyment which you have paid for. That is her end of the bargain and her responsibility. Even in the civvie world it is difficult to honestly tell. So don't worry about it, your objective should be your enjoyment first so she can match her goal with you, making sure you enjoy yourself. Don't make it a goal to give her O during the session, if it happens it happens, if it doesn't happen it's ok also. I eat pussy because it's awesome and I love doing it, if she's cooperating she would give you guidance. Don't do it for her do it for yourself.
Just my thoughts.
... I explain to providers that I'd really like them to be honest with me when it comes to their pleasure. Let me know if I'm doing what they like, or not. I'm a man, but I accept directions. 
And I tell them I'd rather they don't fake their Os. I know sometimes the O just isn't there, and it may have nothing to do with me. Or if it does, maybe there's something I can do to help that O along.
I know my atf doesn't fake it for me, although she's told me she fakes it a lot of the time for others because she doesn't want to disappoint her clients. I know other providers have faked it with me, but some were Oscar-quality performances.
But am betting in many cases.........it adds to a hobbyist's enjoyment if he can HONESTLY make a provider orgasm. I know it does for me..........but the operative word is HONESTLY.
If she FAKES it and is obvious about it........that totally detracts from the experience for me.
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Most of the guys I see share your POV. At first I thought it was odd how much emphasis was spent on my pleasure, but now I welcome it. I can't see a guy booking more than a half hour or an hour if all he wants is to get himself off... kind of expensive and pointless IMO.
but if I'm paying to be pleasured anything you get out of it is your bonus, not mine. Some guys get off on it, want to eat puss the all day, God bless their little wiggly tongues. Not me.
I did not say you only getting yours was pointless... I said paying for multiple hours when you can get off in 10 min. was pointless for guys like you, and most have posted that. They don't want to talk to a hooker, eat with a hooker, sleep with a hooker and get one off so they pay for an hour, cum and go. The same guys all about their nut, are generally not willing to see providers with 2 and 3 hour time minimums. They tend to book an hour and want to pay less than 400.
i misread your post. You were spot on, but you already knew that.
Of course I book 2 hours or more. Not sure how you got that notion from. I'm just saying obsessing over whether a WG cums or not is well... obsessive.
I just want her to see the person I am, hopefully share a few laughs and have her think "hey, I would not mind if he were to call on me again." That being said, because it is a shared experience and it is so intimate, I do want to try to please my P4P partner, just like I do in the other setting. If it happens, great, if it does not happen, that is fine too. BTW, I would guess that for most of us who feel this way it is not a power trip of "yeah, I got her off, look at me! look at me!" it just makes for a better shared experience. I would humbly submit that if one has delusions of being Don Juan, or some other great swordsman, P4P is not the setting to indulge those thoughts.
As for orgasms, I have no idea, I am a complete rube but there are things that cannot be faked unless the person has the most incredible control over pelvic and stomach muscles. In postions in which you are facing each other, there is eye contact, you can see the pupils dilate, there is no way to fake that. Of course, the more you know someone, the better you get at judging what is going on. For example, someone I know rather well gets the most delightful smile, her lips curl in a completely different way that only presents itself when she is having that particular type of good time.
As for orgasms, a few months ago I was at somebody's incall and I could not believe how loud she was. Whether it was fake or not was the last of my thoughts, my immediate thought was that the neighbors beside us, above us and below us had to be hearing that shit. That in turn had me thinking that if this is going on with everybody, it is inevitable that LE is going to be put on notice. Yeah, in a chatty mood, I have a ton of work I do not want to do
Can't say as I agree. Always felt that fucking was about two people connecting for mutual pleasure in this otherwise isolated existence and if not, might as well masturbate.
Maybe it's the ladies I have picked out to be with but except for one I have always felt like they enjoyed it in some way and I think most of them O'd. More than one even picked up a vibrator or something for an extra O while I watched. And come to think of it, with even the girl who seemed completely bored the whole time I eventually found something I'm pretty sure she liked even though she didn't O because I could hear her heavy breathing and faint moaning.
I think it has a lot to do with the attitude you go into it with. If you have the attitude that she doesn't really enjoy it and is just faking it, then it's no wonder that you get your expectations fulfilled.
Just my 2 cents worth. Worth probably less.
Just my thoughts.
Maybe it's the ladies I have picked out to be with but except for one I have always felt like they enjoyed it in some way and I think most of them O'd. More than one even picked up a vibrator or something for an extra O while I watched. And come to think of it, with even the girl who seemed completely bored the whole time I eventually found something I'm pretty sure she liked even though she didn't O because I could hear her heavy breathing and faint moaning.
I think it has a lot to do with the attitude you go into it with. If you have the attitude that she doesn't really enjoy it and is just faking it, then it's no wonder that you get your expectations fulfilled.
Just my 2 cents worth. Worth probably less.
Just putting it out there that's it shouldn't matter so much for people to obsess over whether escorts O or not. Of course mutual enjoyment is always part of good sex. Doesn't mean she has to O. Hell, I don't have to O either. For whatever reason if I can't cum I wouldn't blame the provider.
You listen. Just because you like it does not mean you're any good at it and I for one will stop a guy mid lick if he does something my pussy does not like.
No-one is ever going to convince me that for any amount of money I have to let a guy do anything that is painful. Had a guy use his teeth and another try to suck my clit right off my body...yeah. done and done with that.
So the "don't do it for her, do it for yourself" is fine by me PROVIDING you listen to that guidance I will be giving and all will be good. Are you willing to move on if the hooker has had enough of the pussy eating or are you one of those tricks that feels he can do whatever he wants for as long as he wants because he paid?
No-one is ever going to convince me that for any amount of money I have to let a guy do anything that is painful. Had a guy use his teeth and another try to suck my clit right off my body...yeah. done and done with that.
So the "don't do it for her, do it for yourself" is fine by me PROVIDING you listen to that guidance I will be giving and all will be good. Are you willing to move on if the hooker has had enough of the pussy eating or are you one of those tricks that feels he can do whatever he wants for as long as he wants because he paid?
and definitely don't worry or place pressure on her to reach climax. Try hard = Die hard.
Relax, enjoy yourself and pay attention to her! Let her know that she is pleasing you and getting you there... she will get just as much enjoyment from that knowledge as you do when you know she is enjoying herself. If you both do that, you can each see to your own enjoyment and mutual satisfaction!
As to whether you can know for certain whether she orgasmed? Technically, yes...
There are signs of orgasm that cannot be faked, if you pay attention. During arousal, her labia will engorge and open; her vagina will lubricate and her clitoris will engorge and emerge from under the clitoral hood. Her lips and breasts may enlarge somewhat, and she may have flushing on her face/neck/chest. As orgasm approaches, her nipples may increase in rigidity and the aerolae contract and flush. Heart rate and breathing rate increase. She may have muscular contractions in her abdomen (abdominal ridging) or elsewhere. At the moment of orgasm, her eyelids may flutter, her gaze may become unfocused, her pupils may dilate. Her expression may look like she is in pain. She may become rigid. Her vagina, uterus, anus and pelvic floor muscles will contract more rapidly than can be done voluntarily. The clitoris retracts back under the clitoral hood. These are all produced by the autonomic nervous system.
In reality, not every woman will have every sign and each orgasm might produce different signs at different intensities, depending upon many things. So no... you can't really be certain every time.
I think it's easier to tell AFTER the deed is done. Is she relaxed and languorous? Is she looking me in the face, smiling and eyes twinkling? Are we engaged with one another? I'd rather trust my gut and intuition.
In the end, her orgasm is her responsibility (just as our own orgasm is our responsibility). We can do no more than facilitate it. Enjoy the process, enjoy what you share, and enjoy a little mystery.
And no... do not put her on the spot by asking. Il est très impoli
For me, helping a provider reach an orgasm during DATY gets me even more aroused and gives me almost as much pleasure as my own. I especially love the leg shaking, back breaking mutual orgasms during 69. Can't really say that I know for sure when they are faking, but if they go through that much trouble to simulate a squirming, moaning, body trembling orgasm, I am still happy.
...and it had nothing to do with vocal pyrotechnics. She spasmed and I felt it loud and clear. Other times may have been real but not like that.
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Typically it is when I hand them the cash. Regardless it won't taint my experience if they don't. In this relationship we have with Ho's it is truly all about me!
..times when I know for sure that they haven't..and times that I really can't be sure at all.
I've learned to stop worrying about it so much. It's nice when it happens, and I do derive pleasure from knowing that my partner is enjoying herself--but I can't get too hung up on it. I'll save that kind of concern for my civvie partners.
only three ladies have answered this thread. There's your answer right there.
Even so, there are a few who do enjoy the mutual nature of an encounter. I'll never forget what one atf told me after meeting with a recent newbie. That she had to train him that the session wasn't all about him. That's why she was an atf.
Yes, absolutely. If she cums four times that's 20% off. 15% for three, and 10% for two big ones. If she only cums once, then she tosses your ass, and she'll never see you again. When I schedule her, I do everything in my power to bring my A game.