I'm new at this, so it's not easy. However, I know enough to read a lot of reviews and select ladies that have a friendly, welcoming demeanor. I'll let the more experienced hobbyists deal with newbie providers and women with a more rushed or no-nonsense attitude. I want to be as sure as it is possible to be that my GFE will be confident and cool. When you choose well, she will lead you through the initial conversation and warm-up. A real pro will make me feel like I am charming and interesting, then I can relax into the moment and actually be a good date rather than an inarticulate and sensually inept mess, LOL.
Meeting a stranger for sex is filled with all kinds of unknowns. I would think it's especially nerve-wracking for providers, who know their looks and performance are being judged, and whose future business depends upon pleasing the client. I'm curious, does anyone have techniques or rituals they do beforehand to overcome nervousness? Or is it like some actors and musicians describe, where that energy becomes fuel for the performance?
I'm nervous as heck. I just go with the flow of the event. I try to put the provider at ease. Just introduce myself and ask her what her name is. I let her lead on how things go. I'd rather her not be nervous than me.
Squeeze in some dinner, drinks, medication, yoga, taichi, maybe some golfiing, and spa/steam sauna.
Here's the most important part though: Write a nice love letter to the provider, tell her she's pretty and that you have so much in common and a whole lot to talk about, send her a few PMs, send her flowers to her home, write her a few emails from different email accounts too. lol j/
Don't stay in there for too long though, you might get tingling sensation from too much oxygen which would have the opposite effect of relaxation.
Have you tried hot stones or accu puncture?
My experience was it felt pretty weird and unrelaxing. BJ is better I think.
Helps to try all of these things first
We might ask our resident Oracle JCA, he's an expert on causality and existence. Would he know the answer to the riddle?
Did BJs exist before the BJ session existed? Are BJs fair? Is relaxation fair?
Need provider who does outcall to beyond space-time continuum. If anyone is game, I will add + $10 to donation, as well as guarantee 10/10 review.
...then blew chunks when you arrived. Silly me, not sure where I got that idea. Glad you cleared it up for me.
Okay maybe a couple of times when the girl made me wait 2 hours at the bar.
Other than that I don't show up drunk.
I'll give you one good solid reason: It becomes harder to maintain a steady hammering pace during hammer time when I'm too hammered. It's also harder to ejaculate when I'm too hammered.
After the session, when we go out for drinks, I may drink to excess when I'm not driving
I don't think there is a specific method you can use to calm your nerves, it just takes practice.
It took me a few dates until I felt comfortable to be myself. My first 5-10 times I was such a nervous wreck that I barely got to enjoy myself. Sometimes I still get very nervous when making the phone call.
You will always be a bit nervous/excited when meeting someone new, but you will become much better at managing it.
It has actually helped me in RL too. It makes talking to people, especially women much easier. When a pretty girl talks to me I pretend I'm talking to a hooker LO
...experience will help calm your nerves.
When you say, "When a pretty girl talks to me I pretend I'm talking to a hooker."
Now can that be habit forming? Lol!
I do like what you wrote, though. I also think as time goes by, age helps one to become comfortable in his or hers own skin. Perhaps because of the practice.
"wuddup hoe" has slipped out on more than 1 occasion LOL
Play music on my iPad and have wine or liquor to help break the ice. A gentleman I saw for the first time the other day commented how nice that was, that no one had ever done that before and it really helped him relax. We had a blast : )
The conversation flowed easily and transitioned very smoothly into playtime.
...I do the same when I host. I make sure the lights are turned down low, have one of my playlists playing softly in the background and her favorite adult beverage at the ready. Even though I know it's a sure thing, I enjoy the whole seduction fantasy.
I actually have tried to do the same from my end a few times when I hosted! Awesome!
I ENJOY meeting a new playmate. I've screened the guy, so I'm not feeling wary or defensive. It feels like I'm unwrapping an exciting new toy. I get so much pleasure out of discovering how everything works and what can be achieved - and I'm not just talking about body parts! I enjoy all of the humanness about it.
Sure, there are days when I personally feel like a manatee lumbering around in my heels - but that doesn't translate into anything like feeling "nerve-wracked" about "being judged". And I don't think I have ever had a thought resembling "the future of my business depends upon pleasing this client"... I actually can't imagine having that kind of anxiety about any one encounter, not to mention about the business as a whole.
I hope I'm not an outlier, but I've been doing this a long time, and I still find it (and you gents) un-scary, interesting, and fun.
Great answer, Mimi!
I always get that amped up feeling, but it is related to fear or anxiety only a small percentage of the time. I have always done my homework on the safety of the provider, so my "butterflies" are anticipation of wonderful events to come.
If I'm hosting, I ready the room 10 minutes in advance, and then read until she arrives. If it's incall, I try to get there early and circle the area listening to music for the last few minutes. On those 5 or 6 occasions where I took public transit to the incall, the walk itself made me calm.
I'm new at this, so it's not easy. However, I know enough to read a lot of reviews and select ladies that have a friendly, welcoming demeanor. I'll let the more experienced hobbyists deal with newbie providers and women with a more rushed or no-nonsense attitude. I want to be as sure as it is possible to be that my GFE will be confident and cool. When you choose well, she will lead you through the initial conversation and warm-up. A real pro will make me feel like I am charming and interesting, then I can relax into the moment and actually be a good date rather than an inarticulate and sensually inept mess, LOL.
...that often has me arriving in an anxious state, after having sped down the road, etc.
But once in the room with a beautiful lady, all is good.
...alas, just like his barber, they took a little too much off the top.
The poster was asking about providers not JCA.
but then I thought about e-coli, and decided not to.
Science sucks all the fun out of everyting.
Can science celebrate mothers day?
fast, and annoy myself and the client.
Or whom ever I am around . My mother claims sometimes i talk so fast she cant even understand what i am saying. And again mr fisher has also made the same claims.
I have people tell em to do yoga. I try and be a zen buddha lady as much as I can trust me.
But there is this terribly hyper awkward nerd some what mary catherine gallagherish that seems to rear thier ugly head.
Trust me i want to be that sultry calm cool collective seductictriss for the appts. But on occasion I may ramble in beginning aPPT FROM BEING A LITTLE UNCOMFORTABLE . i AM NOT ALWAYS SUAVE . i D DAY i MANAGE TO BE SUAVE A GOOD PORTION THE TIME BUT MY INNER HYPER ART STUDENT MUSICIAN NERD GIRL is definetly there ...
It can be a mood killer. If i give the client a massage then have then give me one after that always works to snap me out of it. ......................................................
where is Grantlover?..we need him to complete the Dumbfuck triumvirate..
involving all the things I need to get ready to keep my mind focused and calm.
When I first started hobbying I also took a swig of whiskey an hour or so before, but I'm past that now.
Upon meeting the gal, a big hug is the best ice breaker.
I'm usually pretty calm, but I do get a tad nervous. The best ice breaker for me is when the lady meets me with a hug and a kiss. I love that 
-- Modified on 5/10/2015 8:38:12 AM
They go and confess to their priest before every appointment and ask God for a 10 every time.
my knee will sometime shake. If it only shakes a little or for very short time I look at it as a good sign. If my knee shakes uncontrollably I look at it as a bad sign and I proceed with extreme caution or abort mission altogether.
Intangible and un-provable it is a "gut feeling" sixth sense response/dynamic that has often proved accurate and beneficial for me over the past 25 years of "hobbying".
I'm fairly new myself. I get nervous emailing, calling, and meeting still. It is enough where it impacts my performance. There is a lot of risk for me and I end up thinking too much throughout the process.. I have no routine but I think the more often I do it, it will become easier.
before the internet was used much, I used to have to call an ad from a local alternative newspaper. Usually, I had to call from work to schedule something for that evening. Nervous as hell calling since I worked in an office with cubicles. I wasn't nervous meeting the girl, more nervous knowing a driver was waiting outside for her. I really looked forward to meeting a stranger for sex. You never knew where it was going to go.
As I exit the elevator on the tenth floor, I turn and do a quick once-over in the mirrored wall. My hair looks sexy yet demure. My makeup is just the way I want it, girl next store, but not plain Jane. Then there’s my outfit. Well, that’s not something that I can change now anyway.
I MUST PRESS ON. My stomach is in knots and my mouth is dry, which will NOT be helpful I presume for the task at hand. Luckily, I have a bottle of water with me. Without stopping, since I am already twenty minutes late, I drink nearly half of it in just two sips.
I have a small piece of paper in my hand with the number 1012 written on it. Searching for a hotel room is never easy, and when you’re already flustered and panicking as I am, it can be an arduous task. After what seems like an hour and endless direction changes, I finally find my target, room 1012. I am standing at his door. My heart is pounding. I look down and I can see my left breast pulsing. I want to take a second to calm myself down, but I need to get out of this hallway before anyone sees me.
I knock quietly. Nothing. Perhaps in my efforts to be discreet I have knocked too quietly. I knock harder a second time and I hear movement inside. Immediately my mind starts racing with a stream of questions. What am I DOING? What if I am about to be diced up and skinned alive by some complete psycho? Is any amount of money worth risking my safety? While questioning my sanity, my mind is interrupted by the door opening. I quickly draw in my breath and hope for the best.
There he stands, my first client. He is wearing a white terrycloth robe. Immediately his kind eyes put my racing brain somewhat at ease. I make my way around the door. With a quick hug and glance around the room, I feel I have reached the point of no return. I feel at ease knowing that no matter how much I panic now, I am here. I have come this far and now turning back is no longer an option. The rest is up to fate.
If only I knew at the time that this day would be the point of no return, that once a girl crosses certain moral and personal boundaries, there’s no going back
A glass of wine usually gets me relaxed