whom I happen to know, and he's a great guy and they're perfect for each other. If I ever were tempted to go beyond a professional or "just friends" relationship, which I think is unlikely, I know she wouldn't respond in kind.
an ATF and you started to see on a regular basis? Recently I found myself seeing my gal on a more social level while
still doing regular sessions. Not sure its a good thing, but she is a blast to hang with! May have to back off now.
but the OP hardly sounds clingy to me. A clingy guy would be asking our advice on weddings, not thinking about backing off.
My advice to the OP is the same as most here, enjoy your time with her, unless you start developing real and unrequited feelings for her, in which case backing off might not be such a bad idea.
I will admit I am the exact opposite, if I start developing feelings for a gal that I am spending a lot of OTC time with, I simply run with it knowing one of two things will happen, Either one of us (usually me) will get bored and move on, OR we will live happily ever after. So far it's been door number one every time, but I have enjoyed my time/s thoroughly with every one of these young ladies that have become more than just hooker/john relationships.
still doing regular sessions. Not sure its a good thing, but she is a blast to hang with! May have to back off now.
I think if you both enjoy eachothers company, just enjoy it. Open communication and honesty (not just truth but honest about your true feelings) will keep both of you on the same page and you can create whatever story, together, that you like!
Xo Alexa
If that is the direction they both want to take it, then I would agree with you. It's sometimes a very fine line to walk.
Personally, I've been very smitten with one . We matched up in a number of different ways perfectly.
agree, it's all very subjective.
Steoh, who made a comment below yours, also makes a good point.
so now you think it's best to back off? Why don't you ASK her about it? If she feels like it's too much she'll tell you. But to back off after she shared OTC social time and for no other reason sounds, well, not good IMO.
Nice why to reward lady for simply enjoying your company.
Reconsider and ask her.
Steph xoxo
Guys are supposed to be grown-ups too in this hobby.
If he feels like he is getting too attached, he doesn't need to go running to her to share his feelings and to get her input IMO.
I actually think that backing away a bit can be prudent - unless it's clear that they BOTH are comfortable taking the relationship to a different place.
But ESPECIALLY if she views social time spent with him as an act of generosity as you frame it (rather than just mutual fun) then it would seem prudent for him to back off a little if he is growing too attached to her.
that said a lady spends OTC mutually enjoyable time with guy and he starts seeing her less. Um really? He's entitled to do so but it's doubtful he'll be getting any special OTC time again anytime soon.
And as far as as ASKING her it to get her view on things. If he's worried about her getting too close to him, only she knows and can weigh in on her side. Also he he's been getting special treatment and suddenly backs off without communicating with her, that makes it more likely that she may have negative feelings. It's not about what he HAS to do but what works best IMO on any kind of relationship, be it business or personal. It's just good manners IMO if they have gotten tight.
Steph xoxo
-- Modified on 4/24/2015 8:00:21 AM
I'm totally smitten with the provider I'm seeing. I've taken her shopping and to dinner. Even took her shopping on her birthday. It's been 2 years since I first met her. Still love seeing her. My birthday is in May. She's spending the whole day with me on my birthday. Last year on my birthday she turned off her phone in case her regular clients called her. She's Awesome.
I went to my first provider several weeks ago and this girl is so easy to talk with! Not exactly smitten but I could really see myself being friends irl with her. However its a business relationship, it has its pros and cons. I hope to see her regularly but my schedule becomes a lot more busy soon and her schedule also is not very flexible. Well Im going to enjoy it while it lasts and hope you do too!
Hell no, but i most definitely do adore my great friend and she knows it because i'm very open and honest with her as she is with me. We are both on the same page and enjoy one anothers company greatly. If she's reseptive to the relasionship then WTF's the prollem boss. Just keep it simple and uncomplicated and it will be a blast. Simply two adults enjoying life and what comes naturally. In my instance I know it can never be a big romance and i'm quite aware of this. Nothing wrong with mixing business with pleasure if boundaries are respected. It's the furthest thing from being clingy for Christ sakes. If you're saying you may have to back off because you are developing strong feeling for her then that could be a problem for you. Try keeping it in the proper perspective and just have fun, don't let emotion get the best of you. Have a blast and stay friends.
The best part of giving is making others happy and in return that happiness will come full circle. Respect is reciprocal !
Seekers on a social level, they know where they stand though and I'd be completely confused if any of them just decided to stop communication. Please don't do that. It's a kick in the gut that she doesn't deserve! If you are feeling too strongly then you can create some distance but continue seeing her at least for sessions. I enjoy the time OTC to catch up and to chill with my regulars, some I've known for many years. I get random calls from out of state just to check in when it's been awhile, it's nice having that kind of rapport and it doesn't happen with everyone. It also doesn't mean that it will lead anywhere, it's just something refreshing when you find it!
I agree/know exactly where you are.... Saw 2 providers and walked out on 2 CL "bait and switch ads" before I met my favorite...
That will be 6 years ago this fall.
See her at least once a week.... any decent vacation I take , she goes along... not OTC but at a greatly discounted rate than her published website rates.
I have not seen any other providers since... when I had health issues and had a short hospital stay she came by,
I do not think it is weird or unusual that people can connect on a more personal level. The way I look at it , she ''takes care of me'' and she is always thanking me for ''taking care of her''
She used to tour 3-4 times a year, for as long as a month... she hasn't ''had to'' for 5 yrs now. I am happy and she is too
Eloquently put.
A beautiful thing you've found!
I have an ATF. The reason she is an ATF is because she's always "on" when I see her and every session is mind-blowing. If I ever feel like it's something more I'll back off for sure..."something more" is not why I'm in this. You have an inner voice that will tell you whether things are cool or they're going in the wrong direction, just don't forget to listen.
Sort of going thru this now and was wondering if i was the only one,nice to see others have been there done that.
it felt good
whom I happen to know, and he's a great guy and they're perfect for each other. If I ever were tempted to go beyond a professional or "just friends" relationship, which I think is unlikely, I know she wouldn't respond in kind.
and now we are married although we live 1,500 miles apart. It's cool that she's fine with me seeing escorts still, however.
I have seen and still see other gals on a social basis. Sometimes it works out really well, other times, not so much. People are people and you never know how things will end up.
On balance however, I'm glad to have the opportunities to socialize off the clock with some gals, and I'd do nothing different if I had it to do all over again.
...if you're doing so just to avoid bending/breaking some general, ill-defined hobbying rules. Now, if you're feeling uncomfortable with your closeness, or you're getting those signals from her, then definitely pull back. I have the most fun when it feels more like a fling rather than just business.
I like an awful lot of women. I am also extremely immature and selfish, have the sexual attention-span of a gnat and don't see even my regulars more than once every six months.
There are a lot of women I like and consider to be friends, but the little head "dick-tates" I don't go beyond friendship.
Hallelujah, my friend, so am I and I have no intention on changing that.
This sport is a beautiful thing, to be savored and enjoyed, but at the end of the day the fact is that we are selfish bastards that want to have our fun with NSA.
Life is good, lather, rinse, repeat. That's beautiful.
-- Modified on 4/24/2015 9:27:03 PM
That's what i'm talkin 'bout,,,, AWESOME BOOM HAH!!
If she is a 'true' provider you are in for a hard fall. If she is looking for a husband or looking for freebies you are still in for a hard fall. I guess what I'm saying is there is no way you are going to come out ok. Best of luck....
and respectfully disagree... just like any other relationship, there came a time when we agree to disagree and the relationship came to an end... we went our separate ways, no harm, no foul.. As people keep saying here, it's all in the expectations...
-- Modified on 4/24/2015 3:38:04 PM
client / provider... but as long as you both are ok with it, why not. The problem is keeping your head on straight, for both. Better to make small adjustments than to have a major blow up. And there's nothing to say you can not see others to keep your sense of perspective...