Curious to know what the feelings are of providers/clients in regards to helping with the "finish" at the end of the session.
The situation is as follows: CFS and having a great time enjoying the session and can't seem to "finish" in any position and the time is up.
Should the provider offer a HJ to see if that will help with the "finish"?
Should the client ask, if not offered, if she could possibly try a HJ to see if that will work and how long should that attempt be? 1 or 2 min and if that doesn't work, then too bad so sad?
Thx for any insight on what's the best way to "handle" this situation
It sucks when you're unable to finish but you pay to play for an agreed upon time period. If you have the extra cash on hand you could ask your date if she could extend your time. Otherwise LEAVE when your scheduled time is up and schedule another date to try again. Same scenario happened to me not too long ago but I left on time. On our second and subsequent dates since then BOOM goes the dynamite.
-- Modified on 10/30/2014 9:27:07 PM
I had the same problem the first time seeing a provider, but she was gracious enough to allow me 10 minutes after the clock to finish. Of course this isn't standard, and I would assume that most providers would tell you if your time is up, and you haven't completed, the appointment is over and it's on you. While I do think 1 or 2 minutes you suggest is reasonable, I don't think a provider is responsible for getting you to nut over the agreed time frame.
Communication is the key. The gent knows his body and how it functions. be it from meds/health issues/or even the feel of the condom. If he has a prolonged urge to cum. But simply can't get *that release* as he would like.
Then communicate with your date. Let her know what you would enjoy as the end result. Be it a BJ, hj (or even a mutual HJ- you two take turns) there's something very sexy about the way a man holds his cock. Whatever you'd like to enjoy to achieve that much needed release. Then that's what you should enjoy.
Don't make it a chore. Don't let her make it a chore. Keep it pleasurable. A woman knows that mans needs and his release is at times harder to achieve as she might flow into the *doing* or as I prefer, *enjoying* the act to pleasure you to that release. If what she is enjoying on you. Doesn't work. Then honey, communicate. So she doesn't feel like she's not doing it right, for you. 
I think every man ought to invest in a fleshlight....and bring it to the date.
Talk about an interesting and erotic way your lover can give you a HJ and it still feel tight and smooth as if it were a pussy. It's erotic as heck.
The situation is as follows: CFS and having a great time enjoying the session and can't seem to "finish" in any position and the time is up.
Should the provider offer a HJ to see if that will help with the "finish"?
Should the client ask, if not offered, if she could possibly try a HJ to see if that will work and how long should that attempt be? 1 or 2 min and if that doesn't work, then too bad so sad?
Thx for any insight on what's the best way to "handle" this situation.
Thanks for the feedback. Looks like my prob was 3 fold.
1. First time with a provider.
2. First time using a condom in over 10 years.
3. Probably one glass of wine too many.
Basically I scheduled for an hour and proceeded to blab on and on about married life and the reasons for finally scheduling my first encounter with an escort. After the first hour was up, she commented about extending our time, so I agreed and paid for the additional hour. So, $600 into the "date" and after about 30 more mins of using her as a professional shrink, she finally grabbed me by the hand and led me to the bed.
The session was good (non GFE) and she definitely knew how to work her body, she seemed to finish once, excused herself to go to ladies room, came back re-wrapped the little guy and we continued for another 10min, but I just couldn't finish. She said sorry, and I said sorry too and that was it.
I thanked her for listening to me ramble on and on while getting dressed, kiss on the cheek, hug and I was out the door.
Apparently I need to work on my communication skills in regards to the act and finishing. I didn't feel comfortable asking for her to help me finish with a solo or mutual HJ (which sounds like an erotic thing to do together)... I was hoping she would take charge and offer some possibilities to hep with the finish, but she didn't offer any and I didn't ask, so it's on me and I'll Live and Learn.
My dilemma is to schedule another 1hr visit and no drinking or to go through p411 and schedule with a provider that offers GFE and see if that helps with the finish. I'm assuming a GFE session will be great and Finishing won't be an issue, but I've never had one, so we'll see.
Sorry for rambling on here as well, but this is a whole new world to me and I'm trying to figure out if I'm cut out for this Hobby?
But they do learn, as you now learning.
It will get better and better for you.
Someone recently said that hobbying is like pizza. When it's good, it's REALLY good. When it's bad, it's still pretty good, LOL. Sorry, I can't quote who said that to me, I forgot.
Personally I book an hour in between appointments. That leaves time for showers, 5-10 minutes for chatting first, and time to get lost or whatever. I start the time after that chatting, myself. Unless, of course, someone spends more than the typical 5-10 minutes chatting, then I would probably do what your provider did, either initiate contact myself or mention that we only have an hour, we can continue to talk as long as you want to or we can move onto other things.
It's best if everyone can keep an eye on the time and move onto the HJ and dirty talk 5-10 minutes before time is up. But sometimes it sneaks up on everyone. If you wait until time is all the way up to suggest trying something else, it's not very respectful of the providers time. I think you should offer to leave, but it's okay to say you wish you had 5 more minutes to try...whatever. If she agrees, you're not obligated to tip, but it would certainly be appropriate if you did.
Personally, at that time I would say, "We can try for 5 minutes (or however long) but after that you have to be willing to give it up, okay"? After that amount of time if we were still trying I would say, "Would you like to stay for another half an hour"?
This kind of thing does happen all the time. I let people know where they stand. That way I never feel resentful.
Now that you know what can happen, in the future you might try:
1. After 5 minutes of talking take control of your session and initiate contact. It's not rude. This isn't a regular date. It's expected that you will jump right in pretty quickly and not eat your time up with conversation.
2. 10 minutes before the end of the session, ask for a HJ and dirty talk of your choice, or ask her to play with herself, tickle your balls, finger your ass, kiss you on the lips while you jack off...whatever will make it awesome for you!
3. YES! Communicate! It makes it so much easier and better for us when you ask for what you want and need.
4. It's always nice to tip and acknowledge the extra time if someone does go over on time for you, though it's not required if it wasn't discussed. Some people might disagree with me here.
5. You didn't mention this, but sometimes newbies seem to think it's also rude to rush off afterwards...it's not. It's expected. Most experienced hobbyists have learned along the way to maximize their experience by starting the session quickly, using the entire time doing what they want to do until near the end, and then they leave quickly when the session is finished.
I'm not sure why you think P411 will be more helpful that TER. If you're a VIP member, you can go to "escort reviews", then go to "advanced search" and put in whatever criteria you want. It's pretty awesome. I love P411 and it's a great way to keep track of your references and to make booking easy for everyone. But, TER has the best search around, I think. It's worth the 30 per month. And, do you know you can write a review and receive 2 weeks VIP membership for writing it for free? Since you're new...please be as kind and generous as you can honestly be when writing reviews.
Good luck
Thank you for your willingness to be so transparent and honest - a very refreshing quality in a guy!
I really, really sympathize with your situation. While never experiencing it in my own body, I can imagine it must be the very definition of frustrating and unpleasant.
My personal motto is: It's the woman's job to arouse, and the man's to complete. Meaning, if he gets hard, I've done my job. There are factors over which I have no control at play in whether a patron completes or not, and I never blame myself if he does not complete. That said, I consider it a hallmark of my class of courtesan to do everything within my feminine-wiles-power to see that he does complete, including extensions of our time together that are on me.
The scenario you describe has occurred with me a few times. In each case, when this is beginning to occur, I've stopped all sex activity and just lay back with him and snuggle and small-talk. This works to relax and get his mind off of the "MUST...CUM..." type of thought. I find that thought to be the #1 enemy of orgasm. Then a few minutes later I'll start tracing my hands across his body, and eventually start a handjob, subtly at first, then really getting into it, and in 90% of cases, he does complete.
I consider this practice to fall within my personal standards as a top-quality courtesan, and indeed, it may be one of the defining features demarcating mediocre-quality escorts from top-quality courtesans. I'd like to stress, however, that I at no time feel obligated to go over the time, I just do out of courtesy to my beloved patron.
Therefore, I would never suggest that it be standard practice for all courtesans across the board. It is a personal decision of mine. Indeed, I believe a gentleman's standard practice should be to keep an eye sharply on the clock himself, and to immediately offer to pay for another, perhaps, 30 minutes of time if his completion is that crucial to him. He should never, never expect it.
I have found that wonderful things can happen when both parties are not expecting extras, but yet lavish extras on the other anyway.
I hope this helps!
Warmly,
Grace