Really? Could she be that good? Sounds like somebody has fallen hard.
How do you experienced hobbyists deal with an NCNS? My rule so far is "one and done". If I get NCNS'd, that person goes on my DNS list, and I never attempt to see them again. No matter what the reason is, whether it is a deceased relative, car breaking down, misplaced the phone, friend in distress, life got in the way, and so on and so on.
How many of you guys give it a second chance, and when you do, how has it worked out?
I only do incall and if she run me on a while goose chase than I would bother trying to see he again there lot of goof out there also if her Incall or dirrections are to scarry I skip out too.
Say what???
I don't like booking appointments, if I wanted a commitment I'd be somewhere else doing something else. Since making appointments are a necessary evil. From my view point only benefit the lady, they are the ones whom demand the client make an actual appointment. NCNS should not be tolerated, and second chances shall never be granted. I wouldn't hold a personal grudge against someone who NCNS, however I wouldn't knowingly ever try to book with that person again.
How many of you guys give it a second chance, and when you do, how has it worked out?
If you have already come, what difference does it make
No Show is fine if there is a valid reason, and she calls me and explains why she couldn't make it, albeit in general terms. If she promises to make it up to me, and delivers, then we are good..
She is going to have to come to me and make it up to me.. I ain't going back to her kissing her ass for sure..
If its NCNS forget bout it....
Valid reasons and explanations are one thing, if you're a fan of explanations. Where I lose all sympathy for NCNS, is that the client is doing the lady a favor per her request by booking the appointment in advanced. The way I look at it the lady is not showing for her self, and not showing for the client. I don't care if she's in a car accident, or she received a better offer both valid reasons for her to cancel. I wouldn't waste another second attempting to patronize her business.
Huh? That is one of the weirder things I have read in a long time.
-- Modified on 12/27/2014 11:35:10 AM
Granted an appointment can mutually benefit both parties. The lady is the one who emphasizes the importance of "scheduling an appointment" on her website. I'm fine with making a phone call while asking a minimal amount of question. Therefore it is of my opinion that scheduling an appointment is honoring a favor per the lady's request. She is the one who requires the scheduling of an appointment. She is demanding the advanced commitment.
I agree. One of my favorites did a NCNS once. I was ready to write her off, when she contacted me the next day, not only did she have a valid reason, but she went out of her way to make it up to me. Since she did that I gave her another try.
Now another would cancel on me at the last minute multiple times. This was early on in my hobbying. I gave her multiple chances before learning my lesson and moving on. She had a ton of excuses each time. I finally wisened up and quit seeing her. Due to her, I learned my lesson and I will give them one chance, depending on what the reason is and how they handle it.
The right thing for her to do is make it up to you with a free session for the same amount of time you reserved for her in the first place. If she doesn't offer the free session then I think you should never see her and back channel to the other guys that she is a flake. And yes, I mean this for any situation. Car breaks down, dog runs away, death in the family, whatever. It doesn't hurt her or cost her to preserve her integrity by making up the session for free
i'm always surprised when read of hobbyists who have all kinds of trouble booking a session and still try to make the appointment??? I would feel awkward. I'd rather try with another escort.
I had one never pick up when got to the desigated "last step" location. She never responded with reason so will not try again. I had another experience like that, made an alternate plan and when on the way to that she contacted me and offered to take me out to dinner. Didn't take her up on that but tried again and she was my ATF for awhile. Lesson, if they contact you and offer to make ammends OK, if not - too much else out there to have to deal with that...
...you have no idea what happened because she is MIA and you can't communicate with her. In that case for me it would be a one-and-done deal. But if she bails out the last minute with a reasonable explanation, I'd give her another chance. I have had it happen to me only once, but after a reschedule she turned out to be a keeper.
-- Modified on 12/27/2014 10:28:16 AM
I've only had a handful of NCNS, and in most cases they did get back in touch with me.
One did, in fact, have a bad car accident on their way to see me such that even their cell phone got destroyed and they had to wait a few days to get out of the hospital to get to their laptop and email me.
Another also ended up in the hospital* and couldn't reach me until she got out.
A couple attempted to contact me. In one case she sent an email explaining her cell phone went dead. I returned the email but never heard from her again. In the other the gal contacted me by phone saying she overslept and had her phone on silent. I offered to come over but then she just hung up and I never heard from her again either.
Two gals just disappeared and I never heard from them again. Both eventually disappeared from the scene a few weeks later. I guess some heavy stuff was going down for them.
It's a crazy business as one gal is always telling me. We can't act like we're dealing with the phone company or some such outfit.
*medication issues
A NCNS would need a damn good reason to get me to reschedule. Unless she is incapacitated, she can call or text. If she fails to do either I would avoid her like an STD. She is selfish and inconsiderate and not worth my time and money.
and have a reasonable excuse, and offer some sort of compensation for my inconvenience, I'll give them another chance.
The first NCNS I had, the provider sent me a contrite email a few days later and asked if she could call me. We agreed on a time, and when we talked on the phone she didn't offer some lame excuse but simply told me she'd really fucked up and was really sorry and offered me a free session to make it up to me. I countered with extra time, and she agreed and we had a great makeup session.
On my other NCNS, the provider reconfirmed shortly before the session then, nothing. And she didn't contact me afterwards. This was someone I'd seen before and she had seemed eager to see me again. Later I found out she has a history of NCNSes. Needless to say she's on my DNS list.
My record for retrying is 4 and I ended up with 5 NCNS from her. I wanted to see her SOOOO much. The last NCNS: we worked out the schedule and confirmed earlier in the day and again about 2 hours before. It was raining all day but I got to the meeting place. I asked, 'Where are you?' She: 'I'm going to be late. It's raining.' Me: 'It's been raining all day and we spoke about it earlier. How late will you be?' She: 'A few hours.' Me: 'Good bye.' After a one year hiatus, she came back from Europe and contacted me to see if I wanted to see her. Me: 'Good bye.'
Other NCNSs have sometimes had reasonable explanations that I accepted and there were successful followups, usually with 'accommodation' for my trouble. One of my happiest and best sessions EVER followed an NCNS (a now retired Provider who was well known on the Boards); I'm glad I didn't write her off after one NCNS.
Others, I haven't bothered with a second call following an NCNS.
In summary, IT DEPENDS
Really? Could she be that good? Sounds like somebody has fallen hard.
It was early in my "career".
My FIRST ever NCNS had me panicked and running around trying to make sure she was OK, not arrested or kidnapped. We spoke on the phone 15 minutes before and she was at the mall next to the hotels. No answer 14 minutes later. There was a police car outside the hotel. I was calling her and her booker for an hour: "Just let me know you're OK! Please!" The re-book, however, went well and with extra time.
The other NCNS I referred to was a very popular gal who NCNSed me but made up for it with a GREAT session and extra time. She's retired.
However, early on, I was mesmerized by a very beautiful and popular Provider and our emails and texts were always good. Every rebook seemed like it would work. Well, after that rainy day no show (she at least replied to my 'Where are you?' texts) I was over her. At this point, I wouldn't even see her if she PAID me ... since she would probably NCNS again!
Happy New Year Everybody! Even if I'm a no show.
And glad I did! However, it mostly depends on the gal; the hotter she is, the more us guys are willing to put up with.
And, I'm surprised you didn't include "my dog got hurt" in your list of reasons.
Seriously though, the "reason" is totally irrelevant. Have you not ever had to come up with an excuse?
I learned my lesson. If it happens once, it's going to happen again. Show yourself to be a pushover, and you'll soon be a walkover.
I think it's worse with the really hot providers, as they think the train of drooling guys is never going to end, and that every one of the guys is expendable.
If she does not contact you within a reasonable about of time (whatever time frame you see as reasonable) then call another Provider. There are plenty of Providers ready to see you.
why stress over it , take it as a lesson learned and move on , if the lady does call and is nice and does somewhat explain make a decision based on your gut feeling then if not be happy you still have your money and remember that there are plenty of fish in the sea .
have a happy new year !!
How many of you guys give it a second chance, and when you do, how has it worked out?
So, if I get a ncns it's the last time I'll get one from that lady. There are simply too many great other options. I've had a lady cancel a few days prior, that I can understand and I'd see her again as she's given me the respect of advance notice. When I make an appointment I'm squirming with anticipation by the time of the date so I'm very frustrated if she cancels last minute. I don't see BP girls anymore, I've learned my lesson well, so I'm not getting any and I've invested nearly the amount of the donation just to get there.
Now I've heard in here that the ladies get their fair share of ncns, probably from guys that double book to ensure that they're going to see someone. That's a lousy policy, but I can understand why they might do it.
I've had to cancel a couple of times, but the least notice I gave was 48 hours, so as to minimize the inconvenience to her.
I have had a couple of no-show experiences, though with one provider —a delightful lady whom I had previously seen and with whom things seem to have gone well and about whom I wrote a favorable review but who I guess will have to remain nameless here — it occurred twice, in each instance in the form of a last-minute cancellation by her following her confirmation earlier in the day of our scheduled meeting.
The first of the above-mentioned two no-shows involved my showing up at her hotel and on arrival learning from her by phone that she wasn't able to see me. Of course a quasi-credible quote-unquote explanation was offered. I had no choice but to man up, suck it up, and walk.
In the second instance with her, not only had she confirmed our meeting earlier in the day, but she offered to "make it [i.e., the earlier cancellation] up" to me with a second hour at no charge —her "policy," she assured me. This time she e-mailed to cancel about a half-hour prior to our scheduled meeting, again with a sort of excuse and an assurance of what "a nice guy" I was.
The lady continues to visit my city, and I'm still on her mailing list. In fact I've just received a message advising me of her next visit.
Not only am I not taking the bait, I've even refused an attempt to psychoanalyze. Part of the cost of the "time and companionship" of a provider is for freedom from such agonies —all too often part of dealings with women met socially and one of the things we pay not to experience.
The other instance involved a scheduled hour with a porn actress [Can't name names here, either, I guess.] in another city [Can't name places here?]. Her booking agent had earlier advised me that all was to go as planned and even kept in close touch with me following the no-show.
Excuses, a this-has-never-happened-before assurance and the prospect of some other lady of whom I'd never heard showing up in her place were all the consolation offered. The next day I was advised that the porn actress of choice had fallen asleep [busy girl, rough schedule and all that] but would come to my hotel that day or evening to "make it up." The thing is, I was on my way out of town at the time.
In this second instance, the silver lining —such as there was one— was that I dodged a bullet or two: a.) I had suddenly been hit with an episode of the flu at the time of the scheduled meet that would have severely diminished any pleasure in the encounter had it occurred, and b.) I saved a good deal of money.
I'd be happy [I think] to name names if someone sent me a private message request —but why bother?
Life goes on for us all
You're asking two different questions here. If it's a true NCNS, then she no showed with no explanations, neither before, nor after the scheduled session. Just silence. Obviously, how could you expect her to respond to a second inquiry? It would be none and done.
But by saying she had a reason, deceased relative, car breaking down, etc. means that she made contact with you sometime later to apologize. That's a completely different situation. In that situation it would depend on what she said in her apology. Sometimes I've given ladies a second chance, and sometimes no. The truly professional ladies will make it up to you, and those sessions tend to go way off the charts. So you might want to reconsider your hard and fast DNS rules. What do they say about make up sex?
But by saying she had a reason, deceased relative, car breaking down, etc. means that she made contact with you sometime later to apologize. That's a completely different situation. In that situation it would depend on what she said in her apology. Sometimes I've given ladies a second chance, and sometimes no. The truly professional ladies will make it up to you, and those sessions tend to go way off the charts. So you might want to reconsider your hard and fast DNS rules. What do they say about make up sex?
"Not once after an NCNS, has the lady ever been the one to reach out and explain".
If you are one and done, then why do you reach out to procure an explanation? If you get no showed, then automatically put them on your DNS list. No explanation required. Just curious. Have your no shows ever been truly apologetic in their reasons? Have they been professional enough to offer you free or discounted sessions? Or do they simply say, the dog died, sorry? If it's the latter, yeah, DNS.
About half of my no shows the lady reached out to me first. Recently, a lady didn't answer her doorbell. I didn't feel comfortable hanging around the neighborhood, so I rang again, then took off when she still didn't answer. There was an apologetic email waiting for me when I got home, giving her excuse, and offering me 30 extra minutes on the next session. I thought that was highly professional, so I said why not. The next time she did answer the bell. She did give me the extra 30. And it was a brains out session. I've been back to see her several times. Another time I was the one to make contact on a no show. A couple of days later she responded saying she'd confused my name, John, with another Jon, and mixed up the days. Too many Johns huh! Don't ask me why, but she convinced me. She didn't offer any discounts, nor a free session. But I did give her a second chance. That was the only session I've ever had where I thought I was going to have a heart attack.
So I go back to my original thought. It depends on her response, whether or not she wrote first. Just like with the proverbial fake orgasm, is it fake contrition?
You guys can't really do that obviously. If I were a dude, it would be a no-go unless she offered a service recovery option as an apology, and am expression of her respect for my time.
I'm not one to think your time is more valuable than mine, but I also don't think my time is more valuable than yours. It's simply mutual respect. If we can't respect each other, then we should move on.
I usually offer extra half hour, fifty bucks off, hundred, etc etc depending on the trouble. It's a work in progress, but I don't think I've ever actually NCNS. I have cancelled last minute due to body functions that would indefinitely ruin the date, and/or my reputation. Shit happens - but I still offer a sign of respect.
It's simply mutual respect. If we can't respect each other, then we should move on.
Every relationship in our life is based upon respect of one another, this one is certainly no exception.
You are a wise woman Courtney; funny, hot sexy and evidently from your reviews rather talented too.
Just didn't make it to the Windy City this past Summer as I had planned.
There are beautiful zoo lights, awesome bar scene year round, some are open until 4am, great hotel rates, upgrades for honor members because of low demand, lots of shows, and of course - great women everywhere!
January prices are awesome for hotels here.
2014 has been an unusual year for me. My business travel typically has me in Chitown somewhat regularly, but this last year has been an anomaly. I've been unusually busy at work, which has restricted both my business and personal travel. All that said, 2015 will be different. I need to see a professional, so I'll be calling on you. I would like to go on record saying Chicago in Winter Burrr, so you're going to have to warm me up.
Instead of deciding on a rule to follow when I'm not in that situation, I'd wait till the NCNS to arise and decide what to do then. It's like jaywalking. Generally I don't jaywalk. I figure it's safer to cross at a crosswalk even if it means walking a few extra yards. But if there is no traffic on a residential street late at night and the nearest crosswalk is a block away, I might jog across to the other side. But that's not a rule; it's just how I've usually dealt with the question of jaywalking.
My reaction to a NCNS would probably depend on how hot the lady was, what else was going on at the time, my mood, and stuff like that.
The point is that whatever I would decide to set as a rule would probably be no wiser than how I would decide at the time I was dealing with it.
If I do have one if the lady contacts me with a valid reason and an apology. I would consider trying to see her again. Whenever I make an appointment I set something up with a primary and get verified by at least 2 alternates. That way if something does come up I have a backup plan.
I have given a second chance several times. If a provider contacts me the next day after she did not show up, I evaluate what she says and go with my gut.
How has it worked? In some cases it was great, and in other cases the NCNS was repeated.
So there really is no answer. One would like to believe that a provider who does not show up once will more than likely not show up again, but I think that is rare.
Like everything we do in this hobby, you have to go with your gut.
On a NCNS absolutely no second chance. I've had a few last minute cancellations and on the one I agreed to see again I wish I hadn't. I have two more cases like that I am considering scheduling again but haven't had the opportunity yet.
She jerked me around, never replied. A simple, "Sorry, change of plans" would have been nice. I probably wouldn't see her but I'm left with a strong dislike for the way I was treated. She's well reviewed in a nearby area but I would not see her if it was FREE. My time was wasted & an opportunity lost. She is on my DNS list.
I've had to cancel on short notice... once when a severe weather occurance made driving impossible. The traffic on the interstate was totally stopped... She said the sun was out where she was! I rescheduled a couple of days later & I still see her when I'm in her area.
I learned from this & now plan to arrive with extra time. Once I am sure of the location, I withdraw to the corner coffee shop timing my return.
Once a provider didn't pickup in the morning. (It's a long drive & I always called when I got on the interstate so she'd could figure just over an hour for my arrival) We'd confirmed the night before so I was a a bit POd when she didn't answer. I managed to schedule with another Fav lady & had a nice time.
Provider #1 messaged me that "She had to go out of state suddenly." I eventually saw her again... Her sister (married, 2 children) had died unexpectedly & she dropped everything to get there. I saw the funeral card when I was there. (Her sister had just completed chemo for breast cancer, thought everything was good... just died.) The gal I was seeing was pretty traumatized.
Then I felt like a jerk, but how was I to know?
I want to respect the gals I choose to see & expect respect in return. Because of distances, I need dependable appointments. I can't abide the first to arrive business model... I'll never be the first to get there.
-- Modified on 12/27/2014 7:21:14 PM
have car issues and as Heather stated, the provider gave me a free session.
There was another provider who was in tears when I called from the 1st call location (we had talked but 3 hours previously). Her aunt had died. We did get together a few months later.
The 3rd NCNS I never tried to see after she flaked.
A total of 3 NCNS in nearly 12 years of hobbying and none in the past 7 years. Not a bad percentage of successes. Note: Do your homework.
what would a provider do if I NCNS
I just got stood up ncns by a provider that I would have never suspected would do so. I guess it goes to show you that you can do all your homework, get screened, book a session 2 weeks out, follow up with her on a confirmation email the day before and still get stood up 
The bad part is that I just spent 5 days with Dad and Step mom, two sticks in the mud, all the while looking forward to seeing her. She's very well reviewed and I just didn't think she'd pull this crap. So now I'm in Vegas, can't get screened yet tonight and I'm scared to try BP.
Fuck!!!!! Well actually not, right.
Yep, infuriating. My situation is like yours. I only hobby when I travel, and take a lot of care in selection and booking. People that do this, are not only disrespectful of the client's time. They are also removing money from the pockets of other providers, who would have otherwise received the booking. This is one of the big reasons that I am seeing less and less brand new ladies. When one finds a true professional who respects your time, it is much less hassle just to repeat. I realize that shit happens - one of my ATF's cancelled on me a week or so back, but I got 48 hours notice and a rock solid reason. I will see her again because of how the cancellation was handled.
Yes, it is taking money out of other provider's pocket, and it frustrates the hobbyist. If she would have cancelled 48 hours out or even when I confirmed the day before, the excuse wouldn't matter but I could have gotten screened with someone else and all would have been good. And I would've been happy and would've seen her on my next trip to Sin City.
As is stands I'm frustrated. She did get back to me after I posted and told me she fell asleep and woke up late for a 5pm appointment, she asked how she can make it up
Ncns is so rude. But either the person feels entitled, or it was an honest mistake/mishap. In that case, if it were me (hypothetically speaking), I would apologize profusely and be humble and sincere, and I would offer a half price session, and make sure it was the best frickin session of his life lol, and pray he doesn't write a flake review lol...
On my end, I have a 24-hour cancellation policy. If someone isn't totally sure that he wants the appointment, then he should please not book it. I do have other inquiries and if someone makes an appointment, I hold that spot for him obviously. So if he cancels last minute, I could've taken another appointment if it weren't for him, and now it's too late, so he just lost me what I consider a lot of money. So I think my policy is fair.
I definitely appreciate the gentlemen who pick me to session with and to be generous of their time and wallet to, and I respect their schedules. They have a life, too, and might have gone to a lot of trouble to arrange to see me. People who ncns are basically for lack of a better expression, shitting on that...
In my short time hobbying, I've had all sorts of things happen: a last minute cancellation after I'd driven five hours to her city the day before; late, wet hair and in bathrobe, and had her dog in the bed (told that one many times); NCNS on a scheduled four hour first date; and some other things.
I liked the provider who had the dog in the bed, and I'd see her again if she would actually do something to make it up to me, such as offer a free hour or such (sans dog, and with dry hair). I use her as a reference, and she's never mentioned my not seeing her since that one appointment.
I've been told "I'll make it up to you" a few times, but nobody has ever done anything to make it up. Maybe I'm not the type they care about having come back. Or maybe it's just who I've booked with
and we've shared over a year of fun together. She is notorious for her less than timely appointments but she is worth every moment and actually had two ncns. So, always give someone a second chance. Conversely I once canceled an appointment then rescheduled and I've been in heavy like ever since with another. These two are ATFs and if it weren't p4p I'd be completely in love with one Angel. Totally.
Principals over pussy any day. No pussy is worth giving up your self respect over, especially if your are paying for it... Unless it's some BDSM fantasy of yours, and if it is. You shouldn't be in love with your dominatrix you should be in fear of her.
My chances of giving someone I know a "second chance" are much greater than giving a woman who flakes out on our first appointment. The odds go from ZERO to slim. I will confess, some pussy is really THAT good, but she better have a really fucking good excuse, and THAT pussy better be worth killing for, (in the infamous words of Al Pacino, "NO pussy is worth dying for" lol)
But come on guys grow a fucking spine already, you are just giving hookers free rein to run all over you like the spineless weasels that you are.
That is BSU material for sure, and can only lead to always giving a third and fourth chance as well.
Who it is will play a factor in any guy's decision making, so a believable excuse is better than a good one, or an outlandishly fictional excuse. I just like to make my mind up ahead of time, then work my way back depending upon who she is.
Early on in my hobbying career, I made an appointment to see a highly reviewed provider that required some car travel. Called when I reached the hotel 5 mins early (a pay lot requiring use of a charge machine in the hotel, by the way). No answer. No answer for the next 20 mins. I drive off. 15 mins later (30 mins after the scheduled appointment), she texts to tell me she had been in a a traffic accident and would make it up to me.
One week later, I go to the same hotel. This time I park about a mile away in the nearest free lot. Called 5 mins early. No answer. No answer for the next 10 minutes. I leave. Thirty minutes after the appointment was to start, she texts to tell me she had been in a a traffic accident and would make it up to me.
Since then I realize that when this happens, a regular has called, and I've been ejected. I can complain all I want about professionalism etc., but I now know to move on.
She probably ran out of grandmothers.
I had a NCNS last spring, highly reviewed lady. We were supposed to meet late morning, I went to her hotel, nothing. She called me around 10 pm and said she'd left her phone in her friend's car, and offered to let me come over for some midnight fun, double time for the same rate. I took her up on it and we had a great time.
I made an appointment for midnight and was told to text when I was nearby. I texted plus called when I got no response. Straight to voicemail. I had to travel some distance to the incall and I paid for parking. I waited at a nearby bar for a response that never came.
She contacted me the next day by text saying sorry she fell asleep. She said she owed me big time but didn't specify what that would be. I wasn't able to get time to reschedule while she was in town.
I was pretty upset at the time and I do feel like I should be compensated somehow if I chose to see her again.
So would I see her again? Yes but only because I have seen her several times in the past and because I know she is a great provider. If she was a provider I was seeing for the first time or I hadn't built a rapport with I would probably write her off. There are other equally good options in most cases as someone said.
Was in the parking lot. Called to get the room # got voicemail. Waited 15 mins, then texted. Waited longer and emailed. After 45 mins gave up. Had set it up a week in advance then confirmed the night before. Maybe I should have confirmed that day, but when I make an appt I expect to keep it!
After bitching about it here on the NY board ( w/o mentioning names) I get contacted by her with a sob story about breaking her finger the night before by slamming a door on it and spending the night in the ER and forgetting about our "date" due to trauma and to being asleep with a dead phone at the time we were supposed to meet. She texted me a picture of a splint and a black and blue fingernail. I was still a little pissed, but I bit and forgave her. I set up another meeting for the following week, which she agreed to. I called to confirm on the morning of and guess what? Her "girlfriend" had come over due to domestic problems and now she couldn't make it. I was now ready to give up but she said "How about later this week?" Stupidly I said yes and set it up. The night before, she emails me and tells me that she can't make it the next day because its her "birthday" and she'd rather spend it with friends and family. Aaaargh! Why the FUCK would you make a date for your birthday in the first place? How the HELL would you FORGET that it was your birthday? I told her that I would never bother her again and that she should forget me and my number. I felt stupid for going back again and again only to get excuses and more excuses.
My rule now is. NCNS and you lose my business forever, no 2nd chance. It wouldn't kill you to drop an email or text an hour or two before if an emergency arises and offer and follow through with a future appt. I am a generally easy going guy. I just hate having my time wasted or taken for granted.