You actually got one right for a change.
Now, If you can ever find the stones to not only find fault with a woman someday, THEN I will say that you have turned the corner, but in the meantime, you definitely pegged this guy for the selfish loser that he is.
Ladies hello (guys you can chime in if you have something legit to say, but this is more for the ladies).
My ATF and I are in a little bit of a dilemma and I hope you can give us some advice. When I use the term ATF, she is no longer my "ATF" in the traditional sense, but has moved into legit girl friend/love interest realm. Before anyone gets judgmental, no this is not a one sided thing, we have spoken at great lengths (both on the clock and in private) and with many tears shed about where our relationship is heading. We understand that these typically don't end well, that the odds are against us, but it is also not an infatuation for either of us.
We both tried to stay away from each other, I tried other girls, she tried not seeing me; but we had such a deep connection from the very first time we met, that it was not something either of us could ignore. Now that we have both overcome our fears, we are just letting it take us and seeing where it goes.
Seems pretty simple, just start seeing each other, but, the problem is, she is an agency girl and neither of us wants her to lose her job, so we have been playing by their rules, only seeing each other 'officially' (meaning they still get their cut even though she does not charge me). And we both understand the agency position that they are not a dating service, ie if you just want to meet for a donut it's still an hour charge, but on the other hand there has to be a limit to it.
There are some other complications that I can't go into, simply because it is too specific; but the basic question is, how do you as a agency provider as well as a "client", broach the subject with your/her employer? That you want to romantically see one of your "clients" without the timer going off. (she is a high earner for them, and I am legitimately the only one she has allowed herself to go this far with)
I'm not looking to take her away from them (I'm adamant that she needs to leave on her own accord when she is ready to and I will support her [emotionally] with any decision she makes), so this is not one of those "Pretty Woman" movies. I don't call in for other girls, we see each other 2-3 times a week, and we are both pretty sure that they know we talk to each other daily (since she is always 'magically' available for the times I request, even when she tells them she is not working that day)
It would be one thing if they were mean to her, but they have been very generous and kind to her and we don't want to appear like we are trying to take advantage of them.
Have any of you been in this position before? How about a view point from the agency side?
The man in me just wants to go in and talk with them and figure out a solution, but I know that is probably not the best option. We just want to do the right thing.
Thanks in advance
PS, anyone who has the desire to respond telling me that I am a chump, idiot or something along those lines, will be met with extreme ridicule. you have been warned.
If you two are that close, it strains credulity as to why you have to go through the agency to see her - you should know her real name and have her personal phone number/address which you can use to meet up on her days off. You're going to have to give us some more details on what's keeping her under lock and key with this agency.
If she's a high earner, then the only reason for her to stay with the agency is if she has no interest in or is incapable of running her business as an independent. You could probably help her with that transition rather than starting a beef with the agency owner
I know her real (and full) name and have her real phone number, email, and other forms of communication.
Lock and key; an event happened where she lost both her car and her residence. So while she picks up the pieces, she is staying at the agency for now, for free. Not exactly an environment conducive to dating since I can't just go and see her. So in turn there is a loyalty aspect.
But when she does get her car and place back, it is going to seem really strange that the guy she sees constantly just drops off. It will raise a bunch of eye brows.
As for me helping her, I have another life that is preventing me to do so (and she fully knows what is going on there); thus it is not that simple
Keep in contact for emotional support, and if she's truly a "high earner," then it won't take long to get back on her feet. Then, she can go independent. If it's truly real between you two, then any absence will only make your hearts grow fonder for each other.
Edit: after reading you finally making clear that you're married, then it's totally reasonable that she's reluctant to rearrange her life for you if you're not available for her. Settle that situation and she might just come running to you.
-- Modified on 11/21/2014 10:09:59 AM
You two have issues you guys need to figure out before gold coins start raining from the sky m
But even before that how can an agency stipulate that she can't have a boyfriend?
And if you are still paying for sex, let me break you some sad news.. Its NOT a bf/gf relationship..You are just another John that she has soft corner for...
Sorry...I'm confused.. So help me help you..
No I am not paying for sex, she does not charge me. So thanks for playing.
Then you are just stealing from the agency, if you are having sex on their time and not paying... If you are having sex on your own time and when she is not officially working, then there is nothing to discuss here. And if you have to come here and ask us, you are just not man enough to date a hooker
Like Doc said. And he is spot on like he usually is, that you seem to have left out quite a bit from your writeup, and conveniently so.
-- Modified on 11/21/2014 11:48:24 AM
Lock and key; an event happened where she lost both her car and her residence. So while she picks up the pieces, she is staying at the agency for now, for free. Not exactly an environment conducive to dating since I can't just go and see her. So in turn there is a loyalty aspect.
But when she does get her car and place back, it is going to seem really strange that the guy she sees constantly just drops off. It will raise a bunch of eye brows.
As for me helping her, I have another life that is preventing me to do so (and she fully knows what is going on there); thus it is not that simple.
He also has another life...that is encouraging as well 
The real key is to man up, get your divorce and then you will be free to pursue any relationship you want to.
He is sneaking around on his wife, she is sneaking around on her employer, it sounds like a match made in heaven. lmao
I was just about ready to PM perfectstorm to get that number for you as well.
This tool has no clue...and I doubt he ever will.
Even if he got a divorce he'd still have the gals pimp(s) to deal with. And she is probably much better off with the agency than she ever would be with a john who is as clueless as this dude.
Maybe he'll now tell us he's not married and cheating?
He is sneaking around on his wife, she is sneaking around on her employer, it sounds like a match made in heaven. lmao
You apparently did not read, so let me say it again.
1. We pay the agency fee always
2. She does not charge me her portion
3. I am NOT asking people here for permission or anything of the sort. The intent is to get Providers insight on how to deal with the agency.
And as I said in my original post, there are some things that I can't get into because they are way too specific, and the intent is not to out us to the agency. Our intent is to not go behind their backs because they have been really good to her.
Your not entitled to know the details of our relationship. So if you don't have anything constructive to add to the conversation, then keep your opinion to yourself.
You did say that you still pay the agency and just not her... So I give you that. OK.. Fine.. The thing is that I read your 2nd reply to me that you are not paying for sex, and took that as you are not paying for sex at all.
So it begs a question.. Why are you paying at all when you could very well meet her after hours and fuck her without having to pay actual dime for the deed.
Yeah..You are CHUMP, my CHUM...
Just to be clear, it's not about fucking. I know how that makes me sound, but we have not 'fucked' in the traditional wham bam thank you maam for some time now.
Why not see her after hours? That is a combination of both my situation and her own.
Again, we are getting way off topic; the topic is how to broach the subject with the agency so that they do not feel like she is stealing a client.
You haven't "fucked" in the traditional sense? WTF has that got anything to do with anything? You've already commented several times (including your OP) about paying the hooker. Are you now backpeddling and suggesting that you just "cuddle"? LOL
What the hell do you have anything to do with discussing any of her plans with her employer (agency)? None...simply STFU and pay her as you've been doing. When she wants more from you...you'll still be the second to know.
For now her pimp is the route she is happy with...you're just the chump she likes to cry to about her lot in life. Change your name to Richard Gere and maybe all of this will end pleasantly.
Why not see her after hours? That is a combination of both my situation and her own.
Again, we are getting way off topic; the topic is how to broach the subject with the agency so that they do not feel like she is stealing a client.
He's not even bi, IMO. In fact he's getting a divorce from his wife of 16 years because she kept catching him fucking younger WOMEN. The last straw was him hitting on a much younger FEMAILE friend of hers and said friend told her.
He's a well known womanizer. I'm sure back in the gay a lot of gay guys jerked off to pictures of him...And Patrick Swayze too.
Grrrr...
I think Richard Gere is probably a bit old for him, but yeah I can see the previous generations of Andrewwwwws doing that.
One by one. He would have said his nose wasn't perfect, his eyes were a little too close together, and heavens knows what else. It's how al of the features come together visually.
And you read this where? The Globe? Oh. Ok. Nvm
-- Modified on 11/21/2014 8:36:30 PM
OK Steph we believe you.
What about that famous gerbil rumor though?
Or was that just one of those urban legends?
He's a well known womanizer. I'm sure back in the gay a lot of gay guys jerked off to pictures of him...And Patrick Swayze too.
Grrrr...
and I'm going to smack you for that pic!!!
Steph
Just like to keep my facts straight. And, again, no one is saying it's a boy hamster. Live and let live!
She needs a man.. I'll date her....
As a master of the sport, somehow I don't see it forthcoming from him. Maybe he should start off in the kiddie pool, debating the likes of Rod, before jumping into the deep end of the pool.
DEMANDING that no one ridicule your OP is a sure sign of weakness and will draw board sharks like blood in the water. Remember when our little Roddy the Turdmeister DEMANDED respect? and we all know how well that worked out for him.
Not my fault that you can't see how pathetic being a troll is.
But by all means, continue to troll away sitting there in your sad pathetic excuse for a life trying to make yourself feel better.
Did not demand no one ridicule, I was quite aware that the post would bring out the trash. I just simply gave fair warning that if you do, you will be met harshly. But again, only sad little trolls would gloss over facts.
Now run away and leave the conversation to the grown ups.
Your ridicule is as lame as your half truths.
Step up your game if you want to play with the big kids, and please try to be original next time. We've seen hundreds of posters just like you, you are good for a few moments of mild entertainment on a slow day, nothing more.
But by all means, continue to troll away sitting there in your sad pathetic excuse for a life trying to make yourself feel better.
Did not demand no one ridicule, I was quite aware that the post would bring out the trash. I just simply gave fair warning that if you do, you will be met harshly. But again, only sad little trolls would gloss over facts.
Now run away and leave the conversation to the grown ups.
This I can't leave alone: you are on an ESCORT FORUM (sorry but I've come to detest "fuck board") bizarrely asking for advice about how to date your girlfriend without paying her agency (sorry if that's not 100% accurate but it's more right than wrong and in any event I'm not about to divert brain cells from useful tasks to try to fully decipher this nonsense) and you accuse another poster of having a sad, pathetic excuse for a life? Now THAT is some fun shit to read, bravo!
But by all means, continue to troll away sitting there in your sad pathetic excuse for a life trying to make yourself feel better.
Did not demand no one ridicule, I was quite aware that the post would bring out the trash. I just simply gave fair warning that if you do, you will be met harshly. But again, only sad little trolls would gloss over facts.
Now run away and leave the conversation to the grown ups.
WE pay...who the fuck is WE??? You already claimed YOU aren't paying her. So...which is it?
Where is SHE getting the money to pay...and you claimed YOU aren't paying...it's all so confusing LOL
YOU posted a thread...on a public discussion board. Next time post this on the PO board if you are only seeking hookers opinions.
Please continue....this is getting entertaining. Just remember that what you say (post) will be used to remind you of how the story keeps morphing. I expect it since you seem terribly confused yourself.
1. We pay the agency fee always
2. She does not charge me her portion
3. I am NOT asking people here for permission or anything of the sort. The intent is to get Providers insight on how to deal with the agency.
And as I said in my original post, there are some things that I can't get into because they are way too specific, and the intent is not to out us to the agency. Our intent is to not go behind their backs because they have been really good to her.
Your not entitled to know the details of our relationship. So if you don't have anything constructive to add to the conversation, then keep your opinion to yourself.
But you are planing to go behind the agency back as soon as she moves out, no?
This is what you said:
"But when she does get her car and place back, it is going to seem really strange that the guy she sees constantly just drops off. It will raise a bunch of eye brows."
As an agency owner here is my opinion:
The agency owner she works for I'm sure he/she won't be happy with this situation. Working for an agency it means the agency is spending money for advertising and giving her business. That's how you met her no? So for you to go see her as a client couple times and than just take her away from the agency is not fair to them. And from what i understand she even lives at the agency rent free. So it seams to me that they are treating her well.
But on the other hand the agency owner can't force her to stay with them, so if she choses to leave she should be free to do so. By the end we are still human and even we if we are not happy with certain situations we will still understand it.
My advice is if she's planing to leave she should give couple weeks notice so the owner doesn't spend more money on advertising for her.
If you think you can offer her a better and happier life than do it. But if you are married, wasting her time, MAKING HER LOSE MONEY (time is money in this industry) than you should think twice. Don't mess with someones life and income for selfish reasons.
Wish you all the best with whatever decision you make
Carme
Maybe married, cheating, lying guys, already are so used to lying that it comes as second nature to "some" of them?
I have been in the same position (minus being married) as the OP in having dated a couple (ok, maybe a few) women that I met through agency dates as a client. Now to say that they were thrilled to have a guy move from being a paying customer to being a "boyfriend" might be a bit of a stretch, but being upfront about it always went a long ways.
As for the OP, I certainly hope the lady in question is smart enough not to leave her job thinking that this deadbeat is going to give her a better life, unless she thinks that being the "other woman" living on scraps is a better life than the one she has now. As a betting man, I would give odds that she is MUCH smarter than that and will be kicking this loser to the curb shortly.
Seems pretty simple, just start seeing each other, but, the problem is, she is an agency girl and neither of us wants her to lose her job, so we have been playing by their rules, only seeing each other 'officially' (meaning they still get their cut even though she does not charge me). And we both understand the agency position that they are not a dating service, ie if you just want to meet for a donut it's still an hour charge, but on the other hand there has to be a limit to it.
Don't stop here...it's getting interesting LOL
Chump?
Idiot?
Something else...perhaps lovelorn johnnie boy?
This can turn into a fun thread...let's go with it
As Curly pointed out...and I'm sure others including myself are wondering...how is this anything more than a trick paying a hooker deal? I'm sure there's more to your story...let's see what you've conveniently left out that might make this more believable.
My ATF and I are in a little bit of a dilemma and I hope you can give us some advice. When I use the term ATF, she is no longer my "ATF" in the traditional sense, but has moved into legit girl friend/love interest realm. Before anyone gets judgmental, no this is not a one sided thing, we have spoken at great lengths (both on the clock and in private) and with many tears shed about where our relationship is heading. We understand that these typically don't end well, that the odds are against us, but it is also not an infatuation for either of us.
We both tried to stay away from each other, I tried other girls, she tried not seeing me; but we had such a deep connection from the very first time we met, that it was not something either of us could ignore. Now that we have both overcome our fears, we are just letting it take us and seeing where it goes.
Seems pretty simple, just start seeing each other, but, the problem is, she is an agency girl and neither of us wants her to lose her job, so we have been playing by their rules, only seeing each other 'officially' (meaning they still get their cut even though she does not charge me). And we both understand the agency position that they are not a dating service, ie if you just want to meet for a donut it's still an hour charge, but on the other hand there has to be a limit to it.
There are some other complications that I can't go into, simply because it is too specific; but the basic question is, how do you as a agency provider as well as a "client", broach the subject with your/her employer? That you want to romantically see one of your "clients" without the timer going off. (she is a high earner for them, and I am legitimately the only one she has allowed herself to go this far with)
I'm not looking to take her away from them (I'm adamant that she needs to leave on her own accord when she is ready to and I will support her [emotionally] with any decision she makes), so this is not one of those "Pretty Woman" movies. I don't call in for other girls, we see each other 2-3 times a week, and we are both pretty sure that they know we talk to each other daily (since she is always 'magically' available for the times I request, even when she tells them she is not working that day)
It would be one thing if they were mean to her, but they have been very generous and kind to her and we don't want to appear like we are trying to take advantage of them.
Have any of you been in this position before? How about a view point from the agency side?
The man in me just wants to go in and talk with them and figure out a solution, but I know that is probably not the best option. We just want to do the right thing.
Thanks in advance
PS, anyone who has the desire to respond telling me that I am a chump, idiot or something along those lines, will be met with extreme ridicule. you have been warned.
Ok sorry, but I couldn't resist
and yes, I have been in your position before. Actually, I've been there a few times.
First off, the two of you are NOT a couple, at least not just yet. How firmly she deals with her employer will show you just how much she wants this to work with you, and please keep in mind that some women will lie and blame the agency "rules" for things that are a matter of their own choice. I am not saying that this is the case here, but it does happen.
I agree with your wanting to just go to the owner and make your case, but you are most likely better off having your ATF/GF do it for you. Very few agencies have a "No BF" policy, and most agencies will simply look at it as a cost of doing business if she tells them that you are no longer in customer status, but you are now her BF.
The last time I did this and it worked, we started off as simply client/hooker. We "clicked" had a couple of more sessions, a couple of lunch dates, and realized there was something more between us. At first we started off "sneaking around" a bit. I would schedule to be her last client of the day, book an hour appointment and then stay all night, then "sneak out" in the morning before her first morning appointment. After a couple of weeks of this, we/she simply told the owner that we were now dating, it would not interfere in her work, and that's just the way it was going to be. We never had another issue where it came to the agency, and for the next several months I spent about 6 nights a week with her, while she continued to work just like she had in the past.
My advice is to let her deal with the agency, and see if she is sincere about being together, or if she is hiding behind the agency rules. Yes, this can work, but of course unless you truly are a chump, you know there are many hurdles yet to come, and that the odds are against you ever making this work long term, but who cares about the odds? Have fun and good luck.
Thanks.. I appreciate the advice.
I know women lie and blame the agency, but this is truly a unique situation because she lost her car and apartment a few weeks ago and is living at the agency. I can't move her in with me (nor would I, not because I don't want her with me, but because she needs to not rely on me, but instead want to be with me; which when we overcame our hesitations, she started not charging me for time).
Trust me, the relationship part has been thought thru by both of us; and we are both frustrated that we can't be a "couple" in the traditional sense. Part of that has to do with my situation, it's not all on her; I've been winding down a part of my own life since way before I met her and have yet to pull the trigger).
With the agency, It's not a matter of having a no BF policy; but they do have a policy of the girls not being allowed to contact clients outside of work and not going out on "dates".
But I totally get what you say about letting her tell them. The biggest complication is her not having her own place.
To blame this on a car/apartment is just absurd.
Rent her a fucking place...and buy a beater for her to drive. Shouldn't run you more than a session or two a month in fees.
Or just keep on throwing out bullshit.
Why do some of you make any of this so pathetically complicated?
Or there's more to your story? I can't wait LOL
I know women lie and blame the agency, but this is truly a unique situation because she lost her car and apartment a few weeks ago and is living at the agency. I can't move her in with me (nor would I, not because I don't want her with me, but because she needs to not rely on me, but instead want to be with me; which when we overcame our hesitations, she started not charging me for time).
Trust me, the relationship part has been thought thru by both of us; and we are both frustrated that we can't be a "couple" in the traditional sense. Part of that has to do with my situation, it's not all on her; I've been winding down a part of my own life since way before I met her and have yet to pull the trigger).
With the agency, It's not a matter of having a no BF policy; but they do have a policy of the girls not being allowed to contact clients outside of work and not going out on "dates".
But I totally get what you say about letting her tell them. The biggest complication is her not having her own place.
Or MAYBE, just MAYBE, when two people enter into a relationship it should not be because of a required co-dependency.
Then again, those of us who have been in real relationships know the difference of one that is real versus one that is bought. Guess you can't tell the difference.
If you don't have anything constructive to say, then keep your opinion to yourself.
YOU started this thread...put up some drivel that made little sense as it unwound.
And yep...some of "us" have been in real relationships. And some of "us" know that with some effort things can be made to work. However given your short synopsis of this you aren't in any relationship. YOU are simply fucking a hooker that is relying on a pimp to cover her head. If you want to believe it's something else...that's on you.
When this woman is really interested in you...you'll be the second to know it.
Now quit being such a pussy and read the replies here...and you'll have the answers you seek. First get your head out of your ass. I suspect you have trouble adding 1 + 1 as well.
Then again, those of us who have been in real relationships know the difference of one that is real versus one that is bought. Guess you can't tell the difference.
If you don't have anything constructive to say, then keep your opinion to yourself.
And yet again, if you read my original post, this was meant for providers, not you ass clowns.
Nothing has unwound, I intentionally left out things that have no bearing on how to confront the agency.
Yours and others intent is to try to twist this into some sad john falling in love with a hooker, who is just using him for cash story. Which is so not even close to what is taking place, no matter how hard you want to twist my words and inject your own failures.
I don't owe you an explanation, so if you have no idea how to deal with the agency, I will make it simple for you, close your browser, step away from the keyboard, turn off the monitor, and go away.
Since you posted on this board it's an open question. Try the PO board if you only seek hooker opinions.
Plenty has unwound...or are you that dense to read your own posts that continue to share snippets of this sad story?
Glad you understand what is going on here with your hooker pal....but I'd rather hear from the gal or her pimp to gain a better understanding of how you fit into their plans. Your version of this deception is just not believable.
I'll make this simple for you as well...stick with a story no matter how moronic it is. That way you don't open the doors for interpretation by bringing in sidebar after sidebar.
Now how about keeping your original promise?
PS, anyone who has the desire to respond telling me that I am a chump, idiot or something along those lines, will be met with extreme ridicule. you have been warned.
Nothing has unwound, I intentionally left out things that have no bearing on how to confront the agency.
Yours and others intent is to try to twist this into some sad john falling in love with a hooker, who is just using him for cash story. Which is so not even close to what is taking place, no matter how hard you want to twist my words and inject your own failures.
I don't owe you an explanation, so if you have no idea how to deal with the agency, I will make it simple for you, close your browser, step away from the keyboard, turn off the monitor, and go away.
You can't stipulate who can and who can't post...
And here is the tip.. The more you say guys can't post.. the more they will.
The problem with the agency is that: "they do have a policy of the girls not being allowed to contact clients *outside of work* and not going out on "dates".
You continuing to schedule dates with her through the agency----whether or not she is only charging you the agencies portion of the fee----means you are still a client. So...stop being a client. See her on her personal time.
The biggest complication is her not having a place of her own? seriously
If your relationship is where you say it is, things should be at the point where her agency is irrelevant - you should be seeing her on purely personal time. If this so much of an issue, I'd be worried that one of two things are happening:
Either this agency is not as nice to her as it seems - she should not have to be worried about her personal affairs, even with a former client. If she cant do what she wants with who she wants when she's not working, its not a healthy situation, regardless of what other perks/protections they've given her.
Or, the relationship is not what it seems. If her work schedule and relationship with her boss are defining how she still spends time with you, something's off. If you're really into relationship territory, you should be making plans together based on personal schedules, not playing games with her agency schedule.
It really sounds like need some more straight talk with her before you march into the agency and ruffle any feathers.
to get financiallys stable enough to get her place and car back. Otherwise--why???? is she still with them?
And you are 10000% correct. She does need the revenue.
She and I discussed this at length and she wants to be on her own two feet, not relying on anyone; which is what got her into this issue in the first place.
Why is she with them? Honestly, they treat her very nicely. They are letting her stay there, free of charge.
Probably gets ACA, a 401K and vacation as well.
You are so far out of the loop you have no fucking clue LOL
She and I discussed this at length and she wants to be on her own two feet, not relying on anyone; which is what got her into this issue in the first place.
Why is she with them? Honestly, they treat her very nicely. They are letting her stay there, free of charge.
Start over...
And Oh Yes !!! Stop Digging..
...What does her not having a place and car have to do with anything? Is she living at there in call? You see her when she isn't working. Simple. None of their business what she does OTC.
Not sure I believe this but if it's legit you are making it much harder than it has to be.
In short, my situation is equally as muddy, which was messy for a year before I met her. And even if it wasn't, I would not move her in immediately. I made that mistake once, moving a love interest in out of a place of turmoil and dependency.
No, where she is at is not an incall location. It is their office, which means I can't just show up there and pick her up. Clients/Friends etc are not allowed at the office for what I hope is for obvious reasons to the peanut gallery (not directing that to you, to the few ass clowns that are making a valiant effort to twist this into something that it is not).
Regardless of all the sordid details surrounding the situation, the crux of the question is, (which I already got an answer from someone else who was in this situation), what is the best way to approach the agency. Which it should come from her. But I always know that when you are telling someone they are going to lose money, you need to do it from a position of strength, not weakness, where she is at now.
Now the big question, which I am hoping a provider jumps in, is how she should start that conversation with them
She shouldn't. Why would she! You are her escape, someone she can talk with until she gets this sorted out. I doubt once she gets on her feet she'll have anything to do with you. We all need that someone to confide in especially when we hit rock bottom. I've been there and I've been there for others who have been there. You aren't offering her much so you can't and shouldn't expect much. It's very lame of you to put any kind of conditions on how she should go about sabotaging her gift horse. Be there for her and enjoy what she gives you, that's all you can do. Be happy if she does keep you around, it's tough to have reminders around when you've hit your lowest.
No, where she is at is not an incall location. It is their office, which means I can't just show up there and pick her up. Clients/Friends etc are not allowed at the office for what I hope is for obvious reasons to the peanut gallery (not directing that to you, to the few ass clowns that are making a valiant effort to twist this into something that it is not).
Regardless of all the sordid details surrounding the situation, the crux of the question is, (which I already got an answer from someone else who was in this situation), what is the best way to approach the agency. Which it should come from her. But I always know that when you are telling someone they are going to lose money, you need to do it from a position of strength, not weakness, where she is at now.
Now the big question, which I am hoping a provider jumps in, is how she should start that conversation with them.
Why is this even your problem? Your lady should be the one sorting things out with the agency. You don't like the agency's answer? Move her out. Can't? Re-evaluate your ability to hold an actual relationship.
Re posting this since it applies to quite a few of you, and quite frankly your not worth my key strokes;
If your waiting for me to flame you, It's Not my fault that you can't see how pathetic being a troll is.
But by all means, continue to troll away sitting there in your sad pathetic excuse for a life trying to make yourself feel better.
Did not demand no one ridicule, I was quite aware that the post would bring out the trash. I just simply gave fair warning that if you do, you will be met harshly. But again, only sad little trolls would gloss over facts.
Now run away trolls, and leave the conversation to the grown ups.
You really are starting to lose any credibility you ever had, I tried to give you a serious answer as someone who has "been there" many times before, but you don't really want answers to your stated OP. You want to know how to have it both ways. I hope this woman wises up and sees you for what you are.
If you are really looking for a serious answer, Nike summed it up in three words "Just do it" Step up to the plate like a man, and just do it. Somehow I doubt you ever will, and pretty soon the lady will wonder what she ever saw in you.
PS, anyone who has the desire to respond telling me that I am a chump, idiot or something along those lines, will be met with extreme ridicule. you have been warned.
BTW...you're not very good at this online ridicule. I suppose you're just as bad at romance.
Now run away little boy...tell your wife that you love a hooker..maybe let the kids know that daddy's cheating on mommy. And all will be well...I promise LOL
As for "sad, pathetic lives"....did you actually read your OP? Some of "us" actually do lead normalized lives...you OTOH are seeking drama. And hopefully you've found it. And thanks for sharing with "us".
If your waiting for me to flame you, It's Not my fault that you can't see how pathetic being a troll is.
But by all means, continue to troll away sitting there in your sad pathetic excuse for a life trying to make yourself feel better.
Did not demand no one ridicule, I was quite aware that the post would bring out the trash. I just simply gave fair warning that if you do, you will be met harshly. But again, only sad little trolls would gloss over facts.
Now run away trolls, and leave the conversation to the grown ups.
You're a chump. That's a fact.
If your waiting for me to flame you, It's Not my fault that you can't see how pathetic being a troll is.
But by all means, continue to troll away sitting there in your sad pathetic excuse for a life trying to make yourself feel better.
Did not demand no one ridicule, I was quite aware that the post would bring out the trash. I just simply gave fair warning that if you do, you will be met harshly. But again, only sad little trolls would gloss over facts.
Now run away trolls, and leave the conversation to the grown ups.
Econ 101: infinite supply + zero demand = worthles
Many agency providers have boy friends. You two met at the agency doesn't mean you two cannot see each other outside of the agency. If the agency opposes it, then find another agency.
Sounds like lot of BS
If I'm understanding this clusterfuck correctly, she's homeless and sans transport, living at her agency, and seeing you for free. You, meanwhile, are married and not doing anything to help her in terms of her financial situation, yet you want her to put her job in jeopardy by informing the agency of your "relationship" so that you can come and go (pun intended) as you please? If the agency is still getting their cut, I don't see why they would give a shit whether she's getting paid or not. Unless of course you're asking how she should broach the subject so that you no longer have to pay the agency fee either, in which case that makes you a bit of a shyster.
I'm still confused as fuck, but if you just want to have your cake and eat it too, then I doubt anyone here is going to be able to help you. Furthermore, if you're not planning on leaving your wife for this chick, she's not your girlfriend. She's your side piece. If it's any consolation, I don't think you're a chump. I mean, if anyone's getting the raw end of the deal in this situation, it's her.
He's a chump. She's a sucker. Literally and figuratively.
I was entirely too lazy to try to make sense of this.
I genuinely do not see the dilemma. Why would his dropping from the client roster raise red flags? Who cares? I'm sure guys drop out of site all the time.
Why does the agency need to be informed as long as she's seeing him on her personal time? Unless the agency is so controlling that she is not allowed to have a personal life and date whoever she wants to, or even leave the premises on her personal time to do... whatever (including seeing him). In which case, that's pretty much the definition of pimp. And, if MR goodguy loves her so much......
Married guy falls in love with ATF. Many obstacles. How can they make their impossible love work? I think I saw this on lifetime for women network a while back
How, exactly, is the agency getting paid? You're probably directly giving her about half of her regular rate because "the agency" gets that money every time you connect. She's having sex with you because she loves you, and isn't getting any money herself. That's the story, right?
Ask yourself some questions.
Are you calling the agency to book her every single time you see her, or are you booking her directly via email or a call or whatever at least some of the time? If the latter, which is sure how most of us would do it, the most logical explanation here is that she's giving you half-price sessions off the books and the agency isn't seeing a penny.
Also, not to state the obvious, but if you're married either a) don't fall in love with a sex worker or b) get a divorce.
I am virtually certain that you are getting worked somehow here. I think this is how.
If pride makes you deny it, that's totally understandable, but all of the people calling you a chump aren't necessarily wrong. They're unrepentant assholes, yes, but they own it.
Step back and take a hard look at this, man.
-- Modified on 11/21/2014 4:25:47 PM
I couldn't read all of the postings but from what I gathered she is living in the office of the agency she works for.Wow....she needs to get that together first of all.
You don't want her to move in with you but you guys want to be together that is not going to work until she has her own living arrangements.
I used to work for an agency but I did not share anything I did outside of working for them with the agency.
It is not their business but I would not date a client I met through the agency.
You started off as a client and now as a civie love interest best to keep it to yourself.
What I really don't understand is her paying the agency fee but being intimate with you for free so the agency doesn't get suspicious.If you really wanted to help her why not pay her?
How about hook-up with her outside of her working with the agency on her own personal time not the agency?
I don't understand why you or her need to tell the agency anything.
If you want to see her outside of the agency book a room
they talk and cuddle. If you gave her her fee she would be that much closer to having enough to get her own place.
Edited to add:
After reading more of the OP posts he states he still pays the agency fee I would suggest after she becomes independent you do not have to let the agency know why you are no longer a client.
Guys stop seeing ladies or take breaks from seeing ladies he does not owe the agency an explanation on anything.I don't see why she owes an explanation to an agency if she decides she does not want to work for them.She lets them know she no longer wants to work there,getting out of the business,or becoming an independent anything else is not their business in my opinion.
-- Modified on 11/21/2014 6:30:54 PM
How about using the money that he pays the agency with to find her an apartment....
I'm under the impression he doesn't really want to help her, just himself.
You need to stop seeing her until she fixes up her mess and you can be real-world none of the agencies business BF. Since that might not happen before you cave, she needs to sign up for a cooking class.
ATF tells the agency: "No more bookings for me on Wednesdays from 4-7. I'm taking a cooking class." or some other crock of shit. That's your "official" time.
Avoid too many: "The instructor cancelled the cooking class on Wedesday and it got moved to Thursday from noon til 5 PM." The agency might begin to suspect that something's cooking