Only orgies. And I was only a spectator, but I learned quite a bit.
BTW, U is capitalized to show respect and reverence to the disciple of my Lord.
-- Modified on 9/30/2014 7:54:48 AM
I joined this wonderful hobby, or as some pigs might refer to as mongering, about 12 yrs.Starting out from with AMP in Smalltown, PA, I fucked my first prostitute, a Korean Lady, at a tender age of 21 yrs 2 months. Graduating from the KMP, I thought that I hit a lottery when I found an illegal brothel with white women. The reason I compare it to a lottery because these women could actually speak English. What a relief from having to see those poor Korean souls who I thought were brought in and made to work against their will. I always wondered why I got introduced to sex in a KMP, and not at the other illegal brothel? You infidels think that was a coincidence? No it was Lord's plan. The Lord has a plan for You. Read along..
A couple of years later I moved to DC area and found lush pastures of pussy after pussy. That's when I found TER, and joined this community.
But now, my time has come and I must bid adieu to all the gals, gal pals, enemy gals, boys, boy toys, enemy boys, and just plain haters... ok that didn't come out right. H8TRs. OK Better! And that's the reason why I make this post. I have found my girl. Earlier this year, without telling any of you guys (sorry about the brief absence) I took off to Philippines. Little did I know that about 50 miles south of Manilla, in a small parish my future wife was waiting for me all these years. Again Lord's plan. You shall pray to the Lord with all your heart and He shall move the mountains for you. But you need to pray first.
It was love at first sight. Our first few dates were very awkward due to lack of communication, so over one weekend, I went to the local bookstore and got copies of Beginners, Intermediate, and Advanced Tagalog. Now I am an expert in Tagalog. I was amazed at how much unprotected sex goes on in the Philippines. There is one whole village Udöburg. I know sounds German, and there is a good reason for that. Sorry I digress.
Our 4th date almost didn't happen when I suggested we go to Wendy's but my family assured her I was safe. So after the date my girlfriend told me to lift her off the ground. I obliged. Something about lifting tiny Asian woman who weighs less than 100 lbs. Shit I can do that. I am a little shy person when it comes to sexual things, and my thing is a tiny Asian woman riding me like a rodeo. I wonder the night of the wedding, when we first make love, will I be able to tell her to...you know.. how do I say it... I am just blushing trying to get the words out.. get on...you know.. top... Now, you guys and gals know, all the h8trs also know, that I like to help people by giving them suggestions and advice. But today I need some help. I have a friend who I think could use some nice Asian woman riding him. How do I get him laid w/o him knowing that I paid for it. PM me your suggestions if you are shy like me to post them.
I know all of you, well at least some of you, actually most of you, would be rooting for my marriage to be a roaring success. But in case it doesn't I have spotted some tall hotel buildings in Manilla, and have paid enough Dinero to the hotel employees to keep the window on 20th floor open. But that's just a last resort. You never know what can happen to the flame of love between now and our wedding, for the wedding is still a few months away.
And last but not the least, I would like to end this farewell song by praising my Lord and Savior, Sir Borat. Without Sir Borat's blessing (may He bestow His blessings upon all those who believe in Him, and those who don't may be stoned in this life and the afterlife) this pimple faced weasel would have never been able to find his soulmate...Maybe if it wasn't clear to you by now, he got me introduced to sex at a KMP, so I could appreciate my future wife. What a pretty, pretty lady.
So all the glory goes to Him....
Thank you for reading.....
Signing off..
CurlyW - Nats Fan...
P.S. No hateful comments guys. I am tired of all the hateful comments and the four horsemen need to remember the truce..
-- Modified on 9/29/2014 8:43:36 PM
LOL, bro, you had me going for a minute there, just to the point where you brought up the Philippines. Then I knew you were the Second Coming of Udo. So nice job pulling a DC. What is it with you guys?
Nice job!
Go, Nats!
so that's what tripped me. Must've been from one of the retired board pinatas during my hiatus although I can guess who the pinata might be considering he's from city of "Udoburg". HA HA!
It was clear most of it was a joke, with the lifting up 100lbs and worshipping the male model Lord savior and all, but also thought he really found himself a girl so I thought there's a chance he really might be leaving and posted a real farewell with a humorous twist, and leaving with a bang.
I almost wrote "It's about time Curly got a civvie girl... Congrats"
who created these offsprings from many many woman..
It was after about 6 months of learning the art of seduction in the tutelage of Sir Borat that I discovered that even Udo used to be one his disciples.. Hence the swagger.
His tales of barebacking disease-ridden, Third World virgins were epic. You could look it up.
I was busy getting my theology degree trying to become an ordained Gandy minister. (may his blessings be upon Udo).
Caused many a virgin to encounter the burning bush.
What else is there to say.
Seriously you Married a Filipina? LOL!!!!!!! Now you're in trouble. Now she'll want her whole Family to come to the U.S. on your sponsorship. It's easy to marry a Filipina. If you're American Born and Raised those Girls are all over you. How do I know? I've been to the Philippines. There are Hookers everywhere in downtown Manila. Let's see how long you stay Married to her. As Fred Sanford from Sanford and Son says; "I Give It Two Weeks." LOL!!!!!
I came to US when I was a teenager....
We plan to be married forever.. And in future births too..
Signed...
Your real savior and Lord
I will look into following Him if Sir Borat doesn't work out..
and I should know because I would be nowhere without my wife. We met when I was unemployed and she took a chance on me. And it paid off for both of us.
One thing I know to keep a marriage successful is that one person has to be strong when the other is weak. - ALWAYS.
In order to get my dream job I had to temporarily relocate to another city. We kept it together even when we were 2 hours apart. And then she caught me cheating on her. I felt like a complete asshole because I had lied to the other woman. I really did like the other woman but I had to choose my wife (then girlfriend).
That's when I decided to start hobbying. I could not give up sex with other women so I decided rather than hurt other people just best to pay for it and keep it business.
So there that's my story and advice for you. You can have sex with other women and still love your wife.
But we each have to choose our own path.
Good luck and Best Wishes
RT
Thanks for rooting for me..
Stay Strong!!!
At least he didn't add the "pretty lay dee" at the end. LMAO :
They all look the same to me. lmao
Really? If you're going to quit Hobbying at least quit for a Hot Looking Girl. Filipina Girls aren't that Cute. Oh and by the way just to let you know, I'm Filipino. Born and Raised in the U.S. No way in Hell would I sleep with a Filipina Girl. There are way better looking Ladies out in the World.
She must be very Sweet and Adorable!
-- Modified on 9/29/2014 10:23:47 PM
Is this kinda like blacks calling each other n****r, white guys calling each other white trash, GaGambler calling himself a ch**k, and Curly making fun of browns for eating curry. lol
All you blacks, whites, asians, and browns are racists!
Back in highschool, I was in foreign language class with a Filipina girl. She was the prettiest filipina girl I met (TER 10 / 10 bar none) I still regret not making any moves and never dated her.
Then again I wasn't single at the time either
All you blacks, whites, asians, and browns are racists!
Back in highschool, I was in foreign language class with a Filipina girl. She was the prettiest filipina girl I met (TER 10 / 10 bar none) I still regret not making any moves and never dated her.
Then again I wasn't single at the time either.
My point being, just cuz you don't like asian girls doesn't mean you need to say things like "REALLY?". You made it sound like others are weird for liking philipino girls.
I too generally see non-asian girls as well but I don't scream "REALLY??? YOU'D QUIT THE HOBBY FOR AN ASIAN GIRL???" to the others who do see them. Do the white guys scream that to you for seeing white girls?
Get my point
When you've had you Asian Girl Fetish Fufilled, you'll be back in the Hobby soon enough.
And damn, I'd love to find myself a cute little Filipino!
But it is not our place to question His plan. In his wisdom, He has seamlessly woven your hobby life in a full circle – not unlike the stitching on a quality pair of men’s briefs.
You can’t swing a sacred monkey without hitting one deity or another. With Gandy, you get one all-purpose, multi-function being – sort of like a swiss army god.
But that pretty much goes for anything coming out of your mouth.
Now, if I can go find some cow, I can carve me some nice sirloin steak out of her.. I just hope to live to tell the story...
I mean, when's the last time Ganesha showed up to a party in his manties?
Nevermind.. Carry on... Please come again.. APU SEZ....
I have no idea but did Gandy wear briefs or boxer shorts?
-- Modified on 9/29/2014 11:12:27 PM
to play the Orioles in a subway series without a subway.
It is when Yankees play the Mets, it is called the Subway Series. While Angles and the Dodgers duke it out in the Freeway Series.
Can you bench press her? Have you been raw dogging her from day one? Will you offer her up to Borat or Gandy...or both? Does she love curry? Does she Bend It Like Beckham? Will she bring you a warm washcloth on your wedding night?
Your thought if any?
Steph
-- Modified on 9/29/2014 7:15:36 PM
I can bench press about 40 lbs right now. Working on getting rest of 360 in. LMAO
I leave rest to the Lord. Gandy reports to Borat, so clearly Borat is the superior one in the food chain.
Only orgies. And I was only a spectator, but I learned quite a bit.
BTW, U is capitalized to show respect and reverence to the disciple of my Lord.
-- Modified on 9/30/2014 7:54:48 AM
I wish you all the best, although it will never be my lifestyle again, I hope marriage is good to you
Congrats on finding that special someone, and congrats on the Nats.
We will first copulate on the sacred night of our nupitals..
For now, I just jerk off for her on Skype..
And on your wedding night, get ready for the most amazing 30 seconds of your life!
Sad to see you go, but I'm so happy for you.