AFTER they were finished with the intimate stuff. He got worse and worse so she tried to talk to him about it and he disappeared,.
REREAD it, it's all there.
Steph
To The Gentlemen Who Expect It!! Im sorry But Need to Mention This. There has been a lot of Gentlemen asking for dinner companionship OTC. I do not understand your train Of thought. As we might enjoy our jobs and Our time together . It is still away of providing for our self's A Job. We Get Paid By the Hour, It is very presumptuous to ask. Like you have hrs and are done at a certain time So are we. Its getting very annoying!! And Makes Us Ladies Uncomfortable. Its Called Taking Advantage. If you are a Painter Plumber or otherwise would I ask you to fix my pluming or paint my house on your time?
I believe I speak for myself as well as A lot of Ladies. Most Ladies have other responsibilities and things to do after work. Or How Would you like me to Stop by Your Place Of business at quiting Time and start asking or requiring your time And Not Paying for your Time. IF YOU DONT PLAN ON COMPENSATING A LADY for her COMPANIONSHIP FOR DINNER OR SOME SORT DINNING THEN DONT ASK!!! We Are People to and Have lifes Just Like You. Stop Taking Advantage!!!
-- Modified on 8/3/2014 2:13:48 AM
Try saying to the dude...NO
It's easy...problem solved.
What happens when the gal(s) ask the dudes to take them out for dinner/lunch? I would request the same courtesy...please stop taking advantage of my time...and expect me to pay for your lunches.
It's a two way street 
I believe I speak for myself as well as A lot of Ladies. Most Ladies have other responsibilities and things to do after work. Or How Would you like me to Stop by Your Place Of business at quiting Time and start asking or requiring your time And Not Paying for your Time. IF YOU DONT PLAN ON COMPENSATING A LADY for her COMPANIONSHIP FOR DINNER OR SOME SORT DINNING THEN DONT ASK!!! We Are People to and Have lifes Just Like You. Stop Taking Advantage!!!
-- Modified on 8/3/2014 2:13:48 AM
Too bad it was a pointless rant. Traditionally, men are supposed to be the chosen one who ask a girl. A shrewd escort knows how to turn all these men into a business opportunity, because that's where the demand for her services come from.
It's pointless to be whining about the demand (or the side effects of the demand) when what drives men to want to spend time with her is precisely the drive of men that the hobby / escorting biz is taking advantage of.
Why would a guy want to spend a days wage to sleep with her if he wasn't attracted to her? A guy who is attracted wants to spend time together. Sometimes it's just friendship too. Common sense. I thought most escorts understood this lol
My clients want to spend some time with me!!! I got too many clients who are wanting to spending time with me! Roll Great situation to be in if she recognized it as a business opportunity.
The only time its really taking advantage is when the guy backs off from paying what was promised. If he promised to pay to watch her munch on a burger (what a great sight, right!! LMAO) then he should. If it was decided that he will only pay for sex and dinner will be OTC then it would be stupid of you (collective you) to think that he took advantage of you.
There is nothing wrong with negotiating a fair price for whatever it is you want to during the time...
One of my managers (first boss I had when I started working) taught me a very important lesson. "If you don't open your God damn mouth and ask, the answer is almost always NO.". His exact words...
So guys, if you want something ASK for it... And Ladies. If you think that its unfair or not at the market price.. Say NO...
OK, weve just finished our date and it's near lunch or dinner, she's from out of town and I offer to take her out to eat, just as a common courtesy. She can say yes or no I have another appointment. It's really very simple. Your post is totally uncalled for.
Will you feed me every bite and wipe my mouth for me?
... and will you let me put my empty bottles on the floor?
I'm paying for the fantasy...
I've said it before - leave your personal life at home and your professional life at work.
I believe I speak for myself as well as A lot of Ladies. Most Ladies have other responsibilities and things to do after work. Or How Would you like me to Stop by Your Place Of business at quiting Time and start asking or requiring your time And Not Paying for your Time. IF YOU DONT PLAN ON COMPENSATING A LADY for her COMPANIONSHIP FOR DINNER OR SOME SORT DINNING THEN DONT ASK!!! We Are People to and Have lifes Just Like You. Stop Taking Advantage!!!
-- Modified on 8/3/2014 2:13:48 AM
I HATE agreeing with you, but you make a very valid point.
doesn't mean she wants to go out to dinner with you and pretend some more...unless you are paying her. If you ask, she probably doesn't feel comfortable just saying no, so she has to lie to you to make you feel better and potentially save you as a client. She (the collective She) doesn't want to have sex with you or eat with you unless you are paying her. Damn guys, get real!
Maybe you would have preferred a softer delivery of the same truth?
We've all heard a lot softer ways of saying it.
What I find truly humorous is the notion that sometimes during fantasy play, like when I have a high-end lady beg and plead to allow her to, "Please, may I suck you cock?" that she maybe isn't REALLY playing along, but in TRUTH is only pretending to pretend.
As you may have noticed, I'm a little suspicious of how people use "truth" and "reality," especially on this board.
But I do respect people who "tell the truth," or in my own parlance, are speaking honestly about how they see things.
In my line of work I get invited to many things by clients - dinner, parties, sporting events, etc. There are some I can go to and want to go to, others I know I need to go to whether I want to or not, and then there are some that I need to decline for a number of reasons. But I never consider it presumptuous to be asked. It's actually flattering - like I must be doing my job well, and they want to spend time with me. And that they are just not giving me a gift card to the Olive Garden, they must want to spend their valuable time with me too.
To me these are not personal relationships, although some clients are actually friends, and years ago I did date one after our work was done. They are business relationships. And if I go to dinner or a ballgame do you really think it would be a good idea for me to charge them my hourly rate?
I know that most ladies here fashion their work as a business, as the OP states, as well. This sort of invitation simply comes with the territory of having a business, particularly a person services business.
Does a lady need to accept? Of course not. Is is a good business decision to accept? It can be depending on the circumstances? Could it actually be a fun time for the lady? Sure, and I guess we need to let her decide.
I am a firm believer in the notion that if we don't ask the answer is always 'no'. I have admittedly had some really nice 'business' dinners with ladies here otc - I have even been asked by some to join them... in those cases neither of us had to say yes, but we always seem to for any number of good reasons.
-- Modified on 8/3/2014 8:19:47 AM
For years, I have gone to lunch with my dentist, on occasion, and there are doctors and ad people who I have dinner with every other month or so. We are friends, yes, but we also have professional relationships. There are people in my own field who I don't even know that well who I break bread with or join for happy hour occasionally. Aside from talking shop or telling war stories, this socializing is just part of life, nobody pays anybody for sharing time.
Now, when you talk about gentlemen who expect it, it's kind of an oxymoron. Nobody I know would EXPECT me to join them for lunch, drinks, or dinner before of in the middle of any services we provide for each other, so if someone is EXPECTING this of you, he's not a gentleman. But the option is always there, and you might be invited. If you have other plans or obligations, politely decline.
What it sounds like to me is that you look upon your clients as you would some construction worker whistling at you as you walk by and shouting obscenities. As a pretty young thing walking down the street, no, you wouldn't take such a guy up on his, "Hey, baby, lemme buy ya a drink."
Or maybe you would; I don't know you; whatever.
But...
You ought to learn how to distinguish between the two situations.
Assuming that the offer comes AT THE END of the session, your client is already spent and probably won't be putting the make on you. So, if you have time, are planning on having lunch, think relaxing over a drink sounds inviting, the idea of spending that time with someone you've just spent an hour fucking shouldn't seem all that absurd.
Again, you can decline, and in many, many situations, that's what the person offering is HOPING you'll do. Men sometimes feel they are too abrupt in parting. Maybe it takes a super-confident fellow to say, "Well, I'm done!" Then pull up his pants and walk out the door. Many feel it would be a curtesy to invite you to lunch, even though they hope you'll say no, and this facilitates a congenial way of saying good-bye.
And if you say yes, it will only be joining him for a drink or dinner and talking about the weather or politics or whatever, and truth told, there are probably a lot more interesting people he knows who offer far more amusing conversation on such topics than you could.
So maybe adjust how you're looking at this big issue. Instead of paving the world with soft leather, just buy a pair of shoes.
I believe I speak for myself as well as A lot of Ladies. Most Ladies have other responsibilities and things to do after work. Or How Would you like me to Stop by Your Place Of business at quiting Time and start asking or requiring your time And Not Paying for your Time. IF YOU DONT PLAN ON COMPENSATING A LADY for her COMPANIONSHIP FOR DINNER OR SOME SORT DINNING THEN DONT ASK!!! We Are People to and Have lifes Just Like You. Stop Taking Advantage!!!
-- Modified on 8/3/2014 2:13:48 AM
Yes I would expect you to ask... and I would expect to be compensated.
... if I pay you to attend next years hotdog eating contest, would you enter all expenses paid?
If you don't want to go simply say "NO!" If you do go to Dinner with a Client he's already going to pay for your Dinner and Drinks and already payed you for the Session, then you expect to be paid to go to Dinner? Are you Serious? And you think us guys are taking Advantage? I guess Nice Guys do get taken Advantage of.
From My experiences and there have been a few. One comes to mind. It seems to me, That When I have done it on occasion. The Gentlemen Then seems to expect it on A Regular Basis. For example I had one particular Asshole I was seeing Yes Asshole, I enjoyed a lunch with him
and then he persisted on it every session then lunch became dinner Every time I tried to tell him I could not He would reschedule to when I ran out of excuses. In other words If I don't join him for lunch or dinner then no session. I finally spoke up And Guess what His response I don't pay for ladies to have dinner with me. And He was gone Have not seen or heard from him since. AS I Said
This goes Out To the Morons Involved!!! Not The considerate Gentlemen I have had the Pleasure
of Spending time with or the ones who don't pressure the Ladies. And As far as Time I have my regulars that know I do not watch the clock. If you had the chance to spend time with me You would know. But they also don't take advantage of me. So This is final post!! Its not inconsiderate to ask but to put Ladies in an uncomfortable position that was supposed to be my point
We aren't mind readers, If your gripe was with guys who take advantage and can't take no for an answer, that is what you should of said. Instead you lumped every guy that asks a hooker out for a meal as an inconsiderate asshole.
At least it appears that once you discovered the hole you have dug for yourself that you have quit digging. For that I give you kudos, for your OP, not so much.
take up reading lessons!!!
So I guess it's YOU who should take up writing lessons. lol
Like I said earlier, "when you find yourself in a hole, the first step should be to STOP DIGGING" I mistakenly thought you grasped that concept but apparently I gave you too much credit.
I'm not one of the grammar or spelling police. I feel if you can get your point across, then putting "weather" in a sentence where the context suggests you meant "whether" typically doesn't give me any grief. But your OP was not very concise or clear, in fact it was difficult to understand exactly what it was that you were trying to say. By the way, just curious here and not criticizing, what purpose does capitalizing a non noun word serve when you do so mid sentence? I understand that if you were to capitalize the entire word you would be placing emphasis on that word. I'll admit that I'm not in the cool crowd, so perhaps its a new thing that young people do, maybe in texting lingo.
I will say that if I understand your underlying point, I agree. As a client I would never expect a lady to give me OTC time, in fact I would never ask for OTC time because then I open myself up to the bullshit. The beauty of the hobby, is that we the clients get all the fun parts of female companionship without the drama. I've had a few ladies ask me to stay over and hang out for a little while past the end of the session. But, I am the clock watcher. I am very conscious of the lady's time and what this arrangement is and I don't want to take advantage of her.
I agree with the overwhelming responses to your OP, if a client asks you for OTC lunch or dinner and you don't want to do so, just say no. Again, I wouldn't ask you for that, but if I were to do so and you respectfully declined, I'd have utmost respect for your honesty. And if a client gets offended by your honesty, then you probably don't want that guy as a client.
and then he persisted on it every session then lunch became dinner Every time I tried to tell him I could not He would reschedule to when I ran out of excuses. In other words If I don't join him for lunch or dinner then no session. I finally spoke up And Guess what His response I don't pay for ladies to have dinner with me. And He was gone Have not seen or heard from him since. AS I Said
This goes Out To the Morons Involved!!! Not The considerate Gentlemen I have had the Pleasure
of Spending time with or the ones who don't pressure the Ladies. And As far as Time I have my regulars that know I do not watch the clock. If you had the chance to spend time with me You would know. But they also don't take advantage of me. So This is final post!! Its not inconsiderate to ask but to put Ladies in an uncomfortable position that was supposed to be my point
If a Client expects you to go to Dinner before or after a Session then that's totally out of line. I always ask a girl if she wants to go to Dinner with me. If she says No, I'm good with that. I would never ever force a girl to have Dinner with me.
...and guaranteed yourself a longtime repeat customer.
Even assholes have value, if you keep the shit on a one-way course.
and then he persisted on it every session then lunch became dinner Every time I tried to tell him I could not He would reschedule to when I ran out of excuses. In other words If I don't join him for lunch or dinner then no session. I finally spoke up And Guess what His response I don't pay for ladies to have dinner with me. And He was gone Have not seen or heard from him since. AS I Said
This goes Out To the Morons Involved!!! Not The considerate Gentlemen I have had the Pleasure
of Spending time with or the ones who don't pressure the Ladies. And As far as Time I have my regulars that know I do not watch the clock. If you had the chance to spend time with me You would know. But they also don't take advantage of me. So This is final post!! Its not inconsiderate to ask but to put Ladies in an uncomfortable position that was supposed to be my point
...and guaranteed yourself a longtime repeat customer.
Even assholes have value, if you keep the shit on a one-way course.
and then he persisted on it every session then lunch became dinner Every time I tried to tell him I could not He would reschedule to when I ran out of excuses. In other words If I don't join him for lunch or dinner then no session. I finally spoke up And Guess what His response I don't pay for ladies to have dinner with me. And He was gone Have not seen or heard from him since. AS I Said
This goes Out To the Morons Involved!!! Not The considerate Gentlemen I have had the Pleasure
of Spending time with or the ones who don't pressure the Ladies. And As far as Time I have my regulars that know I do not watch the clock. If you had the chance to spend time with me You would know. But they also don't take advantage of me. So This is final post!! Its not inconsiderate to ask but to put Ladies in an uncomfortable position that was supposed to be my point
Her great looks are why you should keep "both eyes" on her.
The fact that she is smart is why I like her even though it is exceedingly unlikely I will ever feast on her beauty.
For the record she is not the only smart woman here, but she might be the best combination of beauty and brains, even though she has the poor taste to associate with the likes of Inicky. lol
It guaranteed me a repeat customer, who'd expect an escalating amount of OTC and freebies. I'd eventually get sick of said customer and fire him. Easier to just set boundaries from the first...that way, if the client can't accept the boundaries, he can go elsewhere, before he winds up hurt and the escort has a coronary from being continually aggravated. Loss of money for the escort short term, but better outcome for both parties in the long term.
In general, once you give a client free time...he not only expects it, but thinks that you two are 'cool' and will take the inch you gave him and run for 10 miles with it...
There are a few exceptions. I have one client I've seen for 5 years...I've not only done OTC with him, but have purchased dinner/lunch for him (on occasion) and have recently offered to do so again, as he just celebrated a landmark birthday. He does understand (without taking offense), that even if I take him out once in a while...our regular session will always be our regular session, and that's with the same fee attached as always. But those types of clients are rare.
Just what I've experienced.
and rightly so. But the best thing that happened is that he disappeared so you could not have to deal with his bad behavior anymore!
I do feel the level of intrusion is not the norm. He's the definition of a "camper", it's just not happening in the room, it was happening at lunch or dinner. Be glad you are rid of him.
That being said your post was a rather sweeping generalization.
Steph xoxo
and then doubling down on stupid, will end up with her digging a hole to China. Which is ironic considering most of us agree with the point she "wanted" to make, but not with what she actually said, but if she wants to dig in her heels and look like yet another BSC hooker, that's her business, although I will confess to perhaps having a bit of fun watching her twist and turn in a web of her own weaving.
Maybe she's only backtracking to please people. Do you work in a carnival? Or, nearly as bad, drive a truck?
She was just frustrated.
Now we know BSC don't we?
Steph xoxo
Why deal with it?
If you need the money, maybe he can be the guy you go to when you want to buy somethng extra for yourself. (Never tell him that though lol.) Your regular business doesn't give you enough to buy that new juicer, (or awesome dress,) so you rotate a guy in who requires his little thing, but when it's convenient for you. As an extra date when it benefits YOU.
Use him like he is using you. But don't give him priority over anyone else. He wants dinner for free, (I.e. Doesn't pay the premium rates,) he doesn't get VIP service.
If I have a client who is dropping money left and right on me, buying extra gifts, and really kind of being an SD more than just paying hourly, that fucker is getting VIP service, his emails answered, and his asshole licked. (NOT literally lmao.)
I like to remind myself that this is not a charity. This is extra curricular for many.
-- Modified on 8/3/2014 8:54:33 PM
when she tried to talk to him about it.
Steph 
Talk about it?
What is there to talk about. She said she wasn't dating him OTC
AFTER they were finished with the intimate stuff. He got worse and worse so she tried to talk to him about it and he disappeared,.
REREAD it, it's all there.
Steph
ince when is an offer to take somebody to dinner taking advantage!!??
From what I remember one is free to decline the offer?!! Or accept it??!!
When I'm done working if you want to stop by and offer to take me to dinner, by all means do so.
Supposin, jest supposin now the woman doesn't have any meeting during meal time? she has free time, gets treated to dinner, and goes back home. now we are just SUPPOSIN!! How was she taken advantage of? Fee time and got a free meal--didn't have to spend $$ to eat.
I have a friend from college who used to tell me about how she was constantly taken advantage of. When I asked a lot of questions about it what I saw was some one who wouldn't or couldn't tell people "This is what I expect." "These are the rules." "NO. I do not want to do that, do not want you to do that." if one won't tell someone what they want or expect jest how is the other person to know they are steppin out a bounds!!
Much easier to remain silent and then complain about being taken advantage of.
Deprived and dumbfounded
No Guy is going to pay you to have Sex with him let alone pay for your Dinner. So enjoy your "Charging Men for Sex" time. Because later on you're not going to have this time when you get old.
Of course I would compare sex with certain GILFs I know to a splendid gourmet dinner that I didn't have to presumptuously ask for otc.
And there will be a time you cant rise to the accession. So your point is???? Cialis and Viagra wont help!!
I've done OTC on dinner dates with some of my favs, sometimes you have to show appreciation to those who's given SO MUCH ...... But to be asked by someone who's new after an hour session to do OTC dinner, well my response "I'm busy"..... But I understand the OP's post!!!
Happy Sunday Funday!!! Have a fab one!!!!
Off to LOLLAPOLOOZA 2014!!!
Xoxo
GC
Men paying to watch someone eat food smh. Gambler hit the nail on the head, their are some providers who actually enjoy the company of the client they're with, and won't mind spending an hr off the clock to enjoy a bite to eat. Easy solution if u don't enjoy time with that particular client, politely refuse his otc dinner request
I believe I speak for myself as well as A lot of Ladies. Most Ladies have other responsibilities and things to do after work. Or How Would you like me to Stop by Your Place Of business at quiting Time and start asking or requiring your time And Not Paying for your Time. IF YOU DONT PLAN ON COMPENSATING A LADY for her COMPANIONSHIP FOR DINNER OR SOME SORT DINNING THEN DONT ASK!!! We Are People to and Have lifes Just Like You. Stop Taking Advantage!!!
-- Modified on 8/3/2014 2:13:48 AM
When I asked Many Clients. What is There definition between( A call Girl)- Companion Escort
And A hooker Or Prostitute. No offense to any of the Ladies to conduct there business as they seem fit to.
The response was a Companion Call Girl escort You are paying to spend time with her amogst other things. A prostitute or steet Lady Charges you per item!! I didnt say it Just asked So going out to dinner would include Companionship which something you would include in a payed situation. !!! and as I have had the pleasure of speaking to some of the high End ladies. Or Highly reviewed Ladies They dont seem to get put in this situation. You wouldnt have the Balls to ask!!!
Good to see you've started digging your hole deeper here. I almost thought there for a second you were smarter than I initially had speculated.
And A hooker Or Prostitute. No offense to any of the Ladies to conduct there business as they seem fit to.
The response was a Companion Call Girl escort You are paying to spend time with her amogst other things. A prostitute or steet Lady Charges you per item!! I didnt say it Just asked So going out to dinner would include Companionship which something you would include in a payed situation. !!! and as I have had the pleasure of speaking to some of the high End ladies. Or Highly reviewed Ladies They dont seem to get put in this situation. You wouldnt have the Balls to ask!!!
The gals that DO enjoy the OTC and realize that strong marketing is part of this business are indeed the gals that enjoy...yeah, actually enjoy...going out with their guys. And guess what..some of them insist on picking the place as well as picking up the check as well. And the highly reviewed...and "high end" (depending on the definition...but let's assume $ 500+ gals) are whom I'm referring to.
Thanks for playing LOL
And A hooker Or Prostitute. No offense to any of the Ladies to conduct there business as they seem fit to.
The response was a Companion Call Girl escort You are paying to spend time with her amogst other things. A prostitute or steet Lady Charges you per item!! I didnt say it Just asked So going out to dinner would include Companionship which something you would include in a payed situation. !!! and as I have had the pleasure of speaking to some of the high End ladies. Or Highly reviewed Ladies They dont seem to get put in this situation. You wouldnt have the Balls to ask!!!
Stop painting with such a big brush and just using black and white.
-- Modified on 8/3/2014 1:49:16 PM
The lady has no other responsibilities.
When I was younger, I didn't mind so much. It was like...'Cool! Free dinner!' And possibly a way to gain a good repeat client whose company I enjoyed...Now, I have work due, like, yesterday, other ppl wondering where I am, a class the next day for which I need to prepare, etc.
With that said, I have long since stopped getting my knickers in a twist if I am asked to a free dinner. I just say no...
If a guy books a dinner date, it does NOT mean that he is a pussy, or that I dislike his company so much I am making him pay. He simply wants a dinner with a lady, and wants to make sure of two things...1) that I do not refuse, and 2) that I do not feel put upon if I accept.
Why is generosity/courtesy so maligned? To each his/her own.
I believe I speak for myself as well as A lot of Ladies. Most Ladies have other responsibilities and things to do after work. Or How Would you like me to Stop by Your Place Of business at quiting Time and start asking or requiring your time And Not Paying for your Time. IF YOU DONT PLAN ON COMPENSATING A LADY for her COMPANIONSHIP FOR DINNER OR SOME SORT DINNING THEN DONT ASK!!! We Are People to and Have lifes Just Like You. Stop Taking Advantage!!!
-- Modified on 8/3/2014 2:13:48 AM
Playtime and dinner afterwards. I would not however give someone a set rate just to watch them eat. For example rate is $500 and hr, I'm not paying someone $500 just to watch them eat food.
And I'm all for generosity/courtesy I would much rather just give her the 500 than to have to pay her 500 to have a meal with me
I get your point thats why ladies have dinner packages!!
I would be totally fine with a play and dinner package.
Have a dinner date rate posted clearly on your website instead of flapping your gums bitching about it here.
The guys may or may not take you up on it, but this way when a guy asks you out for dinner, you can simply refer him to your website. I am beginning to think that you would rather whine and bitch here, than actually find a solution to your problem. If you hadn't noticed there are many other women right here that don't seem to have any of issues with this type of thing that you seem to have. Instead of getting defensive you might try listening to some of the very good advice that you have received here.
it includes public/private time, and is very attractively priced. Say my hourly rate would be $500...this 4-hour date would be about $1200. With as much private time as he needs (within reason). It's technically 4 hours, but I will not 'shortchange' him private time if dinner lasts a bit longer than expected, etc. Same for any date...
If he books 2 hours or even 3, and then asks me to dinner OTC...that won't work. For one thing, I have responsibilities and there is likely stuff on my mind (OMG I have to get in a little bit of studying for my exam tomorrow, or I NEED to do XXX and XXX before I go to sleep tonight). Also, I'd actually prefer not to have any extra alcohol before getting on the road. Third, because dinner dates comprise a large part of my business, if I gave that to every client for free...I'd be broke. And not only broke, but exhausted...a 2-hour date should be a 2-hour date. It shouldn't turn in to a late night.
It really doesn't reflect upon my like/dislike of my clients, though. In general, the clients who book dinner dates are usually very nice and interesting people...in addition, they are usually respectful and extremely courteous.
-- Modified on 8/3/2014 10:28:21 AM
and it beats the hell out of coming on here whining about it. As the "business owner" it's up to you to set the boundaries, especially for something that is a huge portion of your cash flow. For someone to ask you to provide for free what you clearly offer as a professional service would be beyond rude. For someone to ask another provider with less defined boundaries is quite a different matter. As long as the guy is not "pushy" about it of course. No, still means no.
That's my only issue with the OP. It's not her not wanting to be in her words "taken advantage of" it's her poorly written rant directed at virtually any guy that asks a paid date for an OTC meal. If she is as unclear in what she is saying in person as she appears to be here, it's no wonder she is having issues in this department.
Of course, I'd prefer that every client who wants dinner would just book the g**d*** date...but, that will never happen. OTC requests are a part of the business....as are timewasters, people not wanting to be screened, and dudes insisting upon knowing our real names...
The sooner a girl learns to tactfully handle such requests (if they are unwanted), without taking it personally or getting mad, the happier she will be.
The less stupid OP she will make. lol
I mean honestly, women have been fending off the unwanted advances of men since before we had evolved enough from being somewhere the middle of the food chain to the top. If a woman who does this for a living hasn't figured out how to say NO without whining about it on TER, she really should consider another line of work that doesn't require so much thought. Maybe something like becoming a walking billboard would be more her style.lmao
Ok, I know I really should lighten up on the OP a little, she has most likely been pummeled enough for one day, but if she doesn't have enough sense to STOP DIGGING once it was made clear to her that she was in a hole, can you really blame me for a having a bit of fun at her expense?
I get her annoyance, though.
I know a lot of guys got under my skin, when I was new.
It's part of the fantasy. I like looking across the table at a beautiful woman who I know will soon have my cock in her mouth. It gives me a warm feeling worth paying for. So sometimes that's appreciated, and AFTER the session we grab a burger and a beer. But it's neither expected nor anything terribly time consuming.
And, no, I don't get the feeling that she resents spending time with me, and, yes, no one knows anything for sure about what's REALLY going on in the mind of the other person. But the good news is that she doesn't know what I REALLY think of her either. That makes it fun, exciting, and a little thrilling.
So that's pretty much paying a Provider to go to Dinner with you. Sad to know how some Providers Nickel And Dime the Guys out of their Money. Even paying her just for the Sex isn't enough.
If Cloning a Provider is ever perfected in my Lifetime, I'll buy one in a second. It would eliminate getting taken Advantage of by Real Women.
We all could have gone out to a nice dinner together!
Gentlemen Who Take Advantage (with three exp. marks, I believe)... If you think that is the case, and their intention, I would "just say no" and try to find better clients. You do not need to offer any excuses or apologies. A real gentleman would not require that! And if that upsets the guy--then good for you; maybe he won't come back! Since I've never been a provider, I don't what it is like for you. But I'm sure that like any job, there are things that you don't like but have to deal with anyway; and those are probably tougher than most of us can imagine. So my advice is to be polite, say thanks but no thanks; do your best and move on. Also, I think it's out of line for a guy to ask for OTC unless you have seen each other for "some time" and "think" you may know each other. That being said, guys, you will never( or at least rarely) really know each other; so be careful for what you wish for because you just might get it!
Smile sweetly, tell him how wonderful the offer is but that you have something else that needs your attention. And if the gentleman keeps asking, do what I do and let him know you have a very busy life and that any spare time is taken up with family, another job and friends. I remark that the time we spend together is great.
If a guy pushes and makes it clear that OTC is dependent upon him seeing me as in a subtle blackmail I cut him loose. That is taking advantage, not a simple well intended dinner/lunch invitation.
but the only way to be sure that you really want to go is if YOU do the asking, which makes Devin's point so appropriate.
When asking a provider that I know professionally out for dinner, drinks or whatever, I almost always go about it in the same way, something along the lines of "I would love to go have dinner or something with you someday, if you are ever find yourself with some time on your hands and would like to do something, call me anytime, but don't worry, I won't be bugging you about it every time I see you"
I am actually amazed at how many times I have gotten a text or a phone call, days or even weeks later. I guess it's all in the delivery, or maybe women in this business tend to like guys who "get it" at least that's what I've been told.
This is GOLD. The fact that you have the smarts to say that will alleviate much pressure. Most guys take an inch and go a mile which sours guys like you.
I have one guy who I have been seeing for 3 years that I have asked to lunch on quite a few occasions. he now feels that every time we meet it includes extra time for lunch. I give him 1 out of 5 lunches, because I want to. When he gets pouty abut the lack of OTC time, I remind him of what this really is and tell him I am very busy with other work. One week I just plain refused to see him because he pissed me off about OTC. He is a regular client and I want to repay a little extra but if I feel the slightest inkling I ma being taken advantage of, I fix it the best way I know how.
When it's accepted as "special" and appreciated, I love doing a little "extra" but the moment it is taken for granted and I start feeling taken advantage of, I start to resent it, and just like you, I stop offering.
The best part... it's always her idea.
Depends on how established she is. When you're trying to establish clientele in this business or are in real need of good reviews...to ask for OTC time... the man is hanging something over your head and you have to outfox the fox to get out from under that in tact.
When I was in an agency the girls would gather for cocktails at the end of the day and new girls would describe a pushy scenario, maybe he wasn't pushy but he had shown her his influence on the boards and talked about reviewing her. Then he goes and asks for something. (I realized quickly it's the assholes who tell you beforehand they're gonna review you)
Her email- to get looong(or what he calls unrushed) sessions for the same rate behind the agencies back (think about that- working harder for the same amount while jeopardizing your employment…that takes pressure to get), or dinner that very second (some of these fucks would ask the agency owners if you have a couple hours free, agency owner thinks he might extend session if he likes you so she answers yes and now your excuse not to is fucked…yes folks it gets that elaborate).
The newer girl would describe the scenario and a vet could NAME the client. There are droves of men who seek newer girls for this reason and it is a SHITTY right of passage. I can't count how many times I went through these hoops/games. Why do we have to say we have another appointment if we don't. Ego.
I'm just saying depending on the scenario sometimes it feels like a coworker asked you out for drinks and sometimes it FEELS like your boss just did. I'm able to tell the difference and welcome once and despise the other.
The latter feels like this after a session..
Short and sweet - change how you say it. I kick myself in the ass every time I start a new friendship on the wrong path because I'm trying to be polite and make a good impression. You probably had some free time the first time you met that client and thought - "Dinner sounds good."
VOO-doo is passing down some great wisdom so listen up!
YOU can decide how your time is spent. I've had the same issues with clients who are seeking to get as much added benefit to their donation as possible. (See how much nicer you can make an Asshole sounds) It's aggravating, especially when you feel you held up your end of the deal and respected their valuable time. If you can afford to, sever the relationship and POLITELY explain why (it's just business, not your Ex). I've had past clients come back with a better respect and understanding of my time when we've both had some time to ponder it. If all he wants is the freebies, you're probably better off without the aggravation. I know I am.
From my site - "Please don't mistake my kindness for weakness." Stay safe, Chaquita!
I have on a few occasions been told by a few different ladies that we should get dinner and they want to treat me. Calm down people .... I don't need to hear a bunch of crap. It has actually happened on a few occasions and here is the but..... they never seem available to have dinner lol. So why ask is my question. I do not expect anyone to ever go to dinner with me but why ask if u don't have the time ?
is probably not your first language. Your grammar, spelling, punctuation, capitalization, etc. need improvement. There is at least one error is each line of your post.
and being asked this sort of thing is to my mind a compliment on the skills of a provider in making time with a client feel 'real'
all you have to do is say "awwww thank you but unfortunately I have another commitment" or something.....
I have completely lost count of the number of providers who have asked *me* what I was doing that evening and if I would like some company for dinner (OTC)
providing can be a lonely job especially if you travel a lot and it is nice to have someone who understands the scene to talk to.....
Speak for yourself -ONLY!
You don't represent 100% of all providers do you? How do you know 1 or 2 or 3 out of 100 providers if asked WILL do it? Maybe these 1, 2 or 3 providers are just being smart and know that for "special" clients, say high-roller ones it is a GOOD INVESTMENT to keep these guys happy and hooked?
Speaking of high-rollers isn't that what casinos do? they give them SPECIAL PERKS to keep their business
You don't represent 100% of all providers do you? How do you know 1 or 2 or 3 out of 100 providers if asked WILL do it? Maybe these 1, 2 or 3 providers are just being smart and know that for "special" clients, say high-roller ones it is a GOOD INVESTMENT to keep these guys happy and hooked?
Speaking of high-rollers isn't that what casinos do? they give them SPECIAL PERKS to keep their business.
The Provider I'm seeing definitely has me "Happy" and "Hooked."
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