TER General Board

And we don't?sad_smile
scoed 8 Reviews 1166 reads
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I notice your reviews are not linked to your handle. Don't you feel we have the right to screen based compatibility? Don't you think your board posts give insight into who you are as a provider? Doesn't speak to your attitude towards hobbyists? Or do you think that is none of our business?

I think it does speak of you as a provider. I also feel we have the same right to screen you as you have to screen us. That is every right and anyone not screening is an idiotic fool. Yet I don't see your handle linked. Hmmm. That is interesting. Pot, meet kettle.

Now I don't give out my handle until after I see a lady. I have been blackmailed over a review. I rarely review anymore, but I do wish to avoid drama should I choose to. That isn't the biggest reason.  

I post about kinks I am into, yet most ladies I see would never know it because most of my kinks require trust I just can't give someone I have to pay be there. It would suck to be rejected for something I am not asking for.  

Now another reason is my tastes in women very as does what I want from them. Most ladies I see are FBSM providers. But my reviews are of FS and GFE providers. Now a good FBSM provider reading my reviews may reject me thinking I would want FS, but that isn't the case if I am booking a provider that doesn't offer it. I know what a woman offers before I think about booking. Same goes for looks. I like variety in size, shape, race, age, and look in my providers I see. If I am booking I like what I see.

Now I don't give any of my board handles out, but that does not mean I don't wished to be screened. I give my full real name, my P411 handle, references, employment information, photo, answer any questions they have, talk to them on the phone, let them email my wife, or more if asked. I just don't give out my handles. I bet that is more than you give your clients. It should allow you to screen for safety and compatibility more so than all my hobby handles could. No I don't lie about having them.

Now for the record I don't care that your handle isn't linked and I get why. I just find it interesting a woman demanding our handle yet separates hers. I find that very telling.

I used to debate this with another provider, Reagan Moore. I never seen her out of respect for her screening policy. She really turned me on. But if I am not willing to be screened by her rules, then I needed to move on and did. I miss her on this board.

In reviews, what are subtle things you look for that tell you to stay away from a provider or a client? There are of course the obvious things, like thieves, fake photos, B&S, etc. I'm not referring to those. I'm referring to reading between the lines to infer that this or that person is someone you do not want to meet. For instance, if a gent doesn't like hugs, maybe he avoids ladies whose reviews say that she's very affectionate or likes to cuddle. And maybe there are things that are even more subtle.

Likewise, what are some positive subtle things you look for in reviews? Things that tell you that this person would be a great match?

-- Modified on 7/30/2014 9:50:04 AM

have to do with  

whether the encounter seems scripted -  this can be the fault of the way the review is written or the approach of the reviewer to the provider so I don't take only one review into account on this

whether people mention running late,  confusion,  or running out of time at the end of the session

whether it reads as though the provider is more submissive or uninterested -  this is often very subtle and can be a matter of whether the reviewer is entirely focused on what *he* did - and again this can be a matter of the reviewer's writing or his approach to the lady

whether deviation in appearance or body type from expectations based on her pictures is mentioned....

and most of all, the sense of attitude

as far as services as they are described in the review,   I tend to be aware of how the delivery of BBJ  is described - again not over a single review

I notice signs of the provider seeming to want to place limitations on the amount of screwing  

and I especially notice the sense of the provider trying to get the guy off quickly especially where there is no MSOG

You and I could not be more opposite but I think you're a very cool guy.

I look for the pounding for the entire time, monies worth type guy (not that you are that guy, you just like a lot of action). I am very much a screwing limitations type and I don't get any flack from the guys I see. Guess they get what they want cause they keep coming back. And as for you, the ladies must love what you do as they keep re-booking with you. Beautiful when like minds meet right?

well - I really am flexible....   these days I mostly see k-girls through local agencies. They are young, fit,  athletic,  and very service oriented.    

That being said, in the last week I had two very different encounters....

one -  we screwed probably an hour of the 1.5.   We were in mish with a half hour to go and she had a very loud, wet orgasm.... and begged me not to stop....   and had another and another....

on another occasion,  she expressed anxiety about my size.  I let her start on top and take it at her pace.  She got about half of it and asked for me to get on top but be gentle.  She never got it all and obviously was just trying to please me and not enjoying, could not relax, so we moved on... wound up having a mutual O in '69 that was fantastic.....

I do take responsibility for the equipment nature gave me being a bit out of spec :p and for my desire to go at it athletically -    and I am not interested in inflicting an unhappy or uncomfortable time on anyone....

I have had a few regulars ask me to only book at the end of the day though :p

And with guys that are really small, well they can go a lot longer than average or big. As with you, I deal with what nature gave me or rather how my body works.  

I am glad you choose women with higher performance in the areas you need. It is only going to benefit all concerned. I get testy when there is a complete mismatch due to not enough info being passed on. If a guy is big or needs the 59 minutes to get done, I feel a heads up benefits all concerned. Some ladies don;t care but I do, as I do not want to waste a guys time or money and do not want the backlash if I say "please stop".

MK, you're a good dude!!!

I don't see any reason to make anyone elses' life unhappy just to get my own kicks....

I prefer to be with people of similar preferences but always find a way to make a good time out of it when there is some substantial incompatibility -    that's a great opportunity to discover something mutually pleasurable to focus on.....

we might find a way to get along in the client / provider space -  but IRL you would not like me I don't think....    I have a certain lifestyle bent....

Unless you kill kittens and beat up women, I doubt you could have me running in the other direction screaming MONSTER!!!!!

If your predilection is consensual and it does not involve animals or kids, have at it.

-- Modified on 7/30/2014 1:11:08 PM

I am a lifestyle Dom with several decades in the lifestyle.   I am also into S/m and am a moderator / rigger at a local club.  My personal relationships (girlfriend and administrative assistant)  are flavored this way...  

I do believe in safe sane and consensual  or at least voluntary power exchange - and a very high degree of mutual respect and transparency....

and I do not require  bdsm  at all to enjoy an encounter where there is no personal relationship involved -    

I've discovered providers that like a bit of it but I don't bring these expectations to a session....

(as an aside -  a girlfriend from back in the early 80s was Japanese and was a Pro Domme providing services to other Asian women....  when she and I met, she introduced me to the scene and we worked together at times.    She also found that she had a unique submissive streak that she wanted satisfied :p

I find myself less enthusiastic when all the reviews describe the encounter the same way, or just a list of acronyms. I interpret this as her performing her set script and that's what everyone gets. There has got to be room for improvisation. I'm intrigued when there's a variation of in the descriptions of what transpired in the encounter (mostly positive, of course!).

It's also a big plus when there's a lot of talk about her personality in reviews. I actually enjoy a good conversation along with enthusiastic sex. And, I really don't give a shit how many O's he gave her.

One thing I look at right away is the Attitude and Atmosphere notes in the upper-left. Unless the reviewer says something like, "Great," or, " Really nice," and instead tell me how her attitude was great or the atmosphere really nice, that tells me a lot. Bubbly, sensual, playful, whatever it is I get an idea of what to expect in the lady, and I like to avoid the bare mattress on the floor incall, so the atmosphere clues me in on that.

I'm comfortable if I feel the 2-call goes smoothly, that he didn't get lost or have trouble finding a place to park.

Now the negative stuff.

Whenever the reviewer starts using the word "sweet" or "sweetheart" a lot, it's like the age-old description of the woman having "a great personality," meaning probably not much in the looks department, or not very seductive.

Also, "she lets you..." is a phrase I don't care for. That's harder to explain why.

I once clicked on a reviewer's name and counted how many women had given him the best blow job he'd ever had. For some reason I don't trust that. I've only had one really bad BBBJ, and that was a really weird experience, so it never seems necessary to oversell her skill in that area. But sometimes slow-face, hand-tongue, the description of her technique is maybe a factor.

Other than stuff like that, I just want a clue as to what to expect, and what her attitude about her work is. I sometimes make some unusual requests, but I never ask for anything that's not on the menu. I like to play with the fantasy more than most guys, I think, so I try to get an idea of how open and willing she is to get into that stuff. Usually, I can pretty much tell, but I can't point to any one thing that suggests who's good at that stuff and who wouldn't be.

There are reviewers I pay attention to.  Some reviewers write well - others (most...) do not.   Some appear to have similar tastes in women.  Others appear to be from another planet - that I don't want to visit.

In a well written review, I am looking for attitude rather than specific acts.
 
Positives would include -  

Playfulness.
Sluttiness (not certain that's a word - but you get it....)  
Seems to like their work.
Affectionate

In other words - I am looking for someone who is going to be a real blast to shake the bed with for a few hours...

 

 

 

 
 

Posted By: SoftlySarah
In reviews, what are subtle things you look for that tell you to stay away from a provider or a client? There are of course the obvious things, like thieves, fake photos, B&S, etc. I'm not referring to those. I'm referring to reading between the lines to infer that this or that person is someone you do not want to meet. For instance, if a gent doesn't like hugs, maybe he avoids ladies whose reviews say that she's very affectionate or likes to cuddle. And maybe there are things that are even more subtle.  
   
 Likewise, what are some positive subtle things you look for in reviews? Things that tell you that this person would be a great match?

-- Modified on 7/30/2014 9:50:04 AM

I'm looking for upbeat and playful, open.  Disconnected, or distant, are deal breakers for me.  Although I wouldn't call that subtle.  

J

VOO-doo1103 reads

Mostly, just the overall impression I get of the guy's personality. The sense of him that comes through from his writing style, word choice, etc. I want to see that he's kind, considerate, thoughtful, mature, and that he LIKES women (I feel that some guys really don't).  

Positives: If he is appreciative, if he talks about her personality, if he mentions that before or during the session, there were things about her that attracted him in a cerebral sense. If there is criticism, if it's handled with respect and feels fair. In general, if he 'sounds' nice (can't quantify it any more than that).

Negatives: Illiteracy. Writing about sex/female anatomy the way high-school boys talk in the locker room. Reviews that look like acronym soup when stared at from over 3 feet away. Nit-picking (she's pretty but the mole on her right foot kept distracting me). Use of any phrases that compare women to horses or cars. Criticism that feels unfair or like bashing. Excessive and overblown praise rather than a realistic portrayal of a session (it's a turnoff because it makes him sound like he engages in quid-pro-quo or might be a shill).

JackDunphy1363 reads

My reviews were never the girl I was attempting to see's business.  

Girls screen out from reviews and being the customer, once I learned that, just good refs and/or verification site was sent to the gal in question.

If she does not comply with all of your requests. If I am not what a guy expects he is free to find someone who is.  

Would you rather be with someone who knows what you like than someone who, if knew of your peccadilloes, and was not of like mind, refused so you could find a better fit?

Jacko I see your point though, you might get knocked back because of what you like, and not get to see the lady of your choice. However, being with someone who is not really into what you like and is forcing herself can't be much fun, unless that is part of your kink.  

Although some ladies will make like they appear to love it for the duration and never book you again.  

Or you don't give a shit, you want what you want and don't care if she is remotely into it cause you paid.

-- Modified on 7/30/2014 11:01:06 AM

is a very powerful plus -

and one of the main reasons I stick with a couple of favorite agencies....

they seem to tell the girls a bit about what I'm like and what I prefer....  

and have been very thoughtful in other ways....

early on a provider at one agency asked what type of condom I preferred, and then wonder of wonders that type seemed to always be on hand when I booked with other providers, for example....

I mentioned liking the room a bit cooler and appreciating a bottle of water and behold, it was so from then forward with every other girl I booked through them....

and certain more intimate preferences that have been discovered by their talent over time seem to be passed on as well....

JackDunphy1356 reads

That's why I read the reviews in the first place. To weed out the girls that wont do my preferred menu options. When girls use to read my reviews, they would try and tailor make the session to what she perceived as what I liked and it actually had the opposite effect.

In other words I like variety. What I may have enjoyed with girl A, I may not want to do with girl B. For example, I may want to finish with oral in a gals mouth b/c she has a gorgeous face, BJ lips, is amazingly skilled at it, etc.  

But if girl B reads that review, or others like it, she may try and get me to cum orally as well when I chose girl B to finish in doggie b/c she has an amazing ass.

No, its not THAT planned out with me as I can go with the flow and change up based on the girls attire, personality, charm, etc.

Bottom line for me HT is that I don't want a girl to have any preconceived notion about how I want a session to go. I found that to actually have negative consequences.

I admit I wrote that post with me in mind as well, being the hooker. If it works for you, not a reason to change your MO.  

I am one who likes to know certain things, not the entire script but a couple of key things that can and have made a session go south real fast. I hate wasting time and a guys money.  

I do want to add one thing Jacko, and that is it sometimes is not about sex acts but how a guy views women. We can tell a lot by how the review is written. Some guys write like the woman was a fuck doll and the disrespect just glows in the dark.

No way in hell would I see someone like that and if he snuck through, well session ends PDQ and money handed back and door locked.  

Attitude, as many guys have mentioned is as paramount to us as it is to you.

Not at all trying to change your mind, just relaying another perspective as to why I and others like to read the reviews.

-- Modified on 7/30/2014 11:40:07 AM

Men always ask me what I like, the answer- whatever you're good at.  

Also, when I'm choosing activities- what are you responding to- right now.  Not with some other girl.  Another time.  That information is so useless.

It has not been my experience that providers have tried to re-create the exact session I've had before and rated highly at all but I could see that being a concern.....    

but perhaps that is because I am the sort who generally takes initiative....

and making a decision whether to book with me on that basis, or not - as well as taking some of my fairly obvious preferences into account -

this makes for a higher degree of pleasurability for both of us  

and if I'm not her type I'd rather she did not take the booking.....

VOO-doo1250 reads

Posted By: MarkusKetterman
and making a decision whether to book with me on that basis, or not - as well as taking some of my fairly obvious preferences into account -  
   
 this makes for a higher degree of pleasurability for both of us  
   
 and if I'm not her type I'd rather she did not take the booking.....

VOO-doo1442 reads

I could see masking handle to avoid board drama, or something. Or if you want to reserve the possibility of leaving a negative review and avoiding retaliation...but in this kind of situation, it doesn't benefit either party....

I had a guy do this to me once. I'm 99% sure it wasn't you, as I do not seem to be your type. I'd seen him posting on the boards...I ignored one PM he sent me and never replied to any of his ISO's. I not only didn't want to see him...he was EXACTLY the type I wanted to avoid. Not because he left bad reviews...he actually ended up leaving me a good one.

He had good refs...looking back over his refs after the date, with benefit of hindsight, I did see a hint one had made, but it was too vague…the girl didn’t know me, so I guess she didn’t trust me to be discreet with the information she shared. He behaved fine leading up to the session (was schooled in the etiquette)...I had no idea.  

To make a long story short, it was one of my most negative experiences to date and he wound up on a blacklist (not full name, just hobby info). I DO NOT BL a lot, at all. It's not the way I roll. My clients are mostly reasonable people, and if I have an issue, I either deal with the client directly, or just refuse to see him anymore. But this guy was horrible and someone I knew that a lot of girls would, like me, want to avoid...

BTW, he left a positive review. Not my best, but  not one I would have bothered to complain about, numbers-wise...although, of course, I hated the way he wrote about me. It was disgusting to read...it was degrading IMO. Not intentionally on his part - it just reflected the way he viewed women and sex, and the hobby. Which was not very respectful.

I refused to see him again, even after he asked multiple times...even after I suffered financially when I had to go underground and needed the $$ REALLY badly. The experience still rankles, to this day...in 5 and a half years of escorting, some agency...this STILL sticks out as one of the worst experiences.

I guess you don't really care about the woman's experiences, so I won't try to appeal to you on those terms. But this guy's second reference said he was a regular of hers...obviously, some girls are fine with him. I mean, some girls do ANYTHING, especially in NYC. So why wouldn't he just seek out girls who will appreciate and welcome him as a client? And not BL him? Seems like a win/win to me.  
 

Posted By: JackDunphy
My reviews were never the girl I was attempting to see's business.  
   
 Girls screen out from reviews and being the customer, once I learned that, just good refs and/or verification site was sent to the gal in question.

I notice your reviews are not linked to your handle. Don't you feel we have the right to screen based compatibility? Don't you think your board posts give insight into who you are as a provider? Doesn't speak to your attitude towards hobbyists? Or do you think that is none of our business?

I think it does speak of you as a provider. I also feel we have the same right to screen you as you have to screen us. That is every right and anyone not screening is an idiotic fool. Yet I don't see your handle linked. Hmmm. That is interesting. Pot, meet kettle.

Now I don't give out my handle until after I see a lady. I have been blackmailed over a review. I rarely review anymore, but I do wish to avoid drama should I choose to. That isn't the biggest reason.  

I post about kinks I am into, yet most ladies I see would never know it because most of my kinks require trust I just can't give someone I have to pay be there. It would suck to be rejected for something I am not asking for.  

Now another reason is my tastes in women very as does what I want from them. Most ladies I see are FBSM providers. But my reviews are of FS and GFE providers. Now a good FBSM provider reading my reviews may reject me thinking I would want FS, but that isn't the case if I am booking a provider that doesn't offer it. I know what a woman offers before I think about booking. Same goes for looks. I like variety in size, shape, race, age, and look in my providers I see. If I am booking I like what I see.

Now I don't give any of my board handles out, but that does not mean I don't wished to be screened. I give my full real name, my P411 handle, references, employment information, photo, answer any questions they have, talk to them on the phone, let them email my wife, or more if asked. I just don't give out my handles. I bet that is more than you give your clients. It should allow you to screen for safety and compatibility more so than all my hobby handles could. No I don't lie about having them.

Now for the record I don't care that your handle isn't linked and I get why. I just find it interesting a woman demanding our handle yet separates hers. I find that very telling.

I used to debate this with another provider, Reagan Moore. I never seen her out of respect for her screening policy. She really turned me on. But if I am not willing to be screened by her rules, then I needed to move on and did. I miss her on this board.

And Voodoo can correct me but she might post under her work name as well as "VooDoo" and be more than happy to have guys view her reviews. So they will know what's what. Aliases are used by both sides to protect their integrity or just to be an ass or to be able to speak freely. You may not be able to link VooDoo to anything but if she were really Tobi Telford (she is not), you would be able to. I do not know her real work handle.  

Now, a guy can have two handles and be an ass under one and a perfect gentleman under the other. If he were to give out a handle, I am guessing it would be the gentlemanly one, not the asshole one.  

Well you may as well yell pot meet kettle to the guys who want reviews but are not willing to give their review handles.

But don't do shill review so she gets what she earned. Now warning reviews happen regardless of what the lady says. I don't use TER reviews to screen. Most of them ate corrupted. Scores are to a point that anything below a 8 is blacklistsble. I been blackmailed. I have seen reviews that read like rape fantasy novels. I have seen reviews posted of women the guy never seen. The whole review process is completely corrupt so I don't give a damn about them. I now screen backchannel and raw internet data. Hell most of the time I don't even have VIP. No pot meet kettle here.

...that is her with linked reviews. That would be two accounts and TER doesn't allow that. I'm sure there are those that get around it but still isn't allowed.

VOO-doo1162 reads

I used to have a board persona tied to my provider name. Earned me a stalker and in doing so,  ended up killing my former persona.  

This is my only TER account and it is not linked to my reviews. I like to write about my experiences and as a matter of fact do so on a variety of media, most of which is private. As of yet, this is the only public place I write.

My TER posts and desire for anonymity partly derives from my desire to write about my experiences....for easons of my own, it has become important to me to do that...and I enjoy the banter here.

So, if someone wants to book me...meaning, my real escort persona...he found me on another site. The information I share here is not their business, any more than my private journal entries are.



-- Modified on 7/30/2014 3:10:57 PM

I am really wondering. For me and other men this board serves the same purpose. I rarely review or look at the reviews here any more. I use hobby boards to vent and to BS with friends too much drama to use them for more. Why are you entitled to my venting more than I am to yours? I had a provider threaten my wife over an 8\8 review I showed her thinking she would appreciate it. My mistake. Bat shit crazy dangerous loons exist in great numbers on both sides. Give me why you are more entitled than I.

By the way, I think you are perfectly entitled to not link this handle with your provider self. I get it and am glad you use it the way you do. I just don't get why you don't think I am entitled to the same.

VOO-doo1138 reads

While I do not have board posts, i do have reviews (which I did not particularly want, but so far it has turned out for the best...I have not 'claimed' them out of a desire to remain low-key) and I am on p411. So a guy can be assured that I am safe and reliable, as advertised...he can backchannel, do whatever he needs to do. I am not an unknown. The type of experience one will get with me is quantifiable.

We are in a much more vulnerable position.

I have to worry about being degraded, seeing men with violent fantasies, unsafe requests, extreme fetishes...men who are aggressive or rough...all of whom might have references. Or, just a run-of-the-mill asshole. All of whom a TER handle might help me avoid.

And, we can also be blackmailed vis-a-vis reviews. I would prefer not to see the 'usual suspects' in my market and so far have successfully avoided them

-- Modified on 7/30/2014 4:11:15 PM

And she threatened my wife's safety. Short of rape it don't get worse than that. And if I give real information and with that the power to look into my real life, and give real information to LE, blacklist sites, or who or what ever is necessary to deal with what ever bad behavior I could engage in more readily than any handle, who cares about a handle on a hobby board?  

I don't care about VOO-doo because if I am seeing you I have something far more difficult to shed, like your real business name. If guys are giving real information, that if you are smart are collecting, I don't see the need. Real name real power to protect, fake name fake security. Even in your example he gave a fake name. How did that work for you? I still don't see the difference. TER handles are BS and easily faked.

VOO-doo996 reads

With enough references or p411 Ok's, I do not require a real name. I do not ask for TER id as part of my screening, I look it up by email address, if there is one. I use whatever information I find to help make a decision about whether or not to make a date.

Your situation is regrettable, but it is much more rare than a lady having a bad date with a client. I have heard of ladies threatening to out or blacklist over a review...but your situation is truly unusual.

Also, you have the recourse of calling the cops. As you previously posted...we do not.

Sorry, but we ARE more vulnerable. My motives in using an alias of sorts are NOTHING like those of an asshole who hides disrespectful reviews or board posts..

VOO-doo853 reads

Sorry for double posts. I am on my phone.

Two experiences I would qualify as abusive...I either had the guy's full name, or the agency did. The one I saw o n my own also had 8 date ok's...and I double checked with 3 of them, as is my habit...what more can ya do?? I had a TER id as well, but he didnt review.  

Anyway, I only want to read reviews to avoid a bad situation, or confirm good thoughts. A guy has enough info about me already, that he can know EXACTLY what kind of girl and date he will get...anything else, is none of his business. I want the same...and TER handles have helped me avoid a helll of a lot more jerks than real names...just sayin.


-- Modified on 7/30/2014 6:02:40 PM

First of all I respect your right not to link your reviews to your handle. I have no problem with that. I am not equating those so called hobbyists with you. Those creeps need exposing but as you experienced, they will just give a secondary handle created just for fooling you. My hobby email is not my hobby board email so that will nor work if the guy has a brain. I am comparing your not linking your reviews to my not outing my handle. Those of that mistreat providers are scum. Sadly only real information offers real protection.

Of course your risk is greater, you likely see more guys in a month than most hobbyists see in a year. Given crazy dangerous is equally distributed among the sexes you will be put at risk more than I or most other hobbyists for that matter. It is a matter of numbers. But if you think I can go LE your crazy. Seeing a hooker is just as illegal as being one. In my state both are class B misdemeanors. Same exact level of punishment. Why the hell do you think I didn't report the black mailing bitch? LE will gladly arrest us all.

By the way. I commend you on using every screening tool you have. If looking up email addresses on TER has saved you, keep it up. I have no problem if you take hobby information instead of real information as long as you feel safe. I would not trust it, but I am not you. My issue was when I thought you was demanding TER handles regardless of other screening information provided. It seemed hypocritical give you don't give yours. As you don't require it per say but use what is given to screen, well you should. Trust me I look up provider emails where ever warnings are likely. I think everyone should screen everyone in this.  

As for my case bring unusual, it was. Most guys don't have an active sex worker as a wife. Those that do normally do not broadcast it on a hobby board. I put my wife in harms way by giving both real name and TER handle. No one is getting both until I have met them and feel I can trust them. It isn't me being sneaky avoiding screening, just me protecting my wife from the psychos out there. After I had a chance to feel a lady out I freely give it. Sometimes guy not giving out his review handle isn't the creep that mistreats providers, but the one trying to avoid drama, like you.

VOO-doo1219 reads

I think we're on the same page now. I can totally get you finding it odd that I'd require a board handle as part of screening, but hide my own.  

I've never required it, and a lot of my clients come from off of TER, so they either don't have one, or are not active users. Most wouldn't even know what 'board handle' was.  

I've had a few nice guys from TER, and a few who contacted me and were refused, for whatever reason. Most of the time, and reading reviews was just one more piece of info that confirmed what I already knew from refs etc.

In my example (way up top of the skinny thread), his etiquette was very good pre-date, so short of haranguing the references, reading reviews was the only thing that might have helped me avoid the situation. Not sure why he hid his reviews. I didn't like him, as I said, but I don't think he'd have considered his reviews offensive. He wasn't dangerous. Just not a good situation for me

VOO-doo883 reads

With enough references or p411 Ok's, I do not require a real name. I do not ask for TER id as part of my screening, I look it up by email address, if there is one. I use whatever information I find to help make a decision about whether or not to make a date. So I do care about review handles and they have helped me both ascertain that a guy is a good match, or that he NEEDS to be avoided...

I offer enough information for a guy to know I am safe, what I look like, what I offer,  what kind of person I am. That is basically all I ask for in return...minus the looks...

Your situation is regrettable, but it is much more rare than a lady having a bad date with a client. I have heard of ladies threatening to out or blacklist over a review...but your situation is truly unusual.

Also, you have the recourse of calling the cops. As you previously posted...we do not.

Sorry, but we ARE more vulnerable. My motives in using an alias of sorts are NOTHING like those of an asshole who hides disrespectful reviews or board posts..

(Obviously this would exclude cases where they don't ask for that stuff)

What I mean is, do you respond by giving her your "alternate" handle, or telling her you have no handle? Because if so, that's weak. If you were to just say "I'm not comfortable divulging that," then that's fine, but if you're deliberately deceiving her because you're afraid you'll get rejected on the basis of your reviews, then I have a problem with that.  

Posted By: JackDunphy
My reviews were never the girl I was attempting to see's business.  
   
 Girls screen out from reviews and being the customer, once I learned that, just good refs and/or verification site was sent to the gal in question.

And that is why as someone stated, that's the 'nature of THIS beast' and why I will never ever use this site to screen guys. While I know for a fact a 'few' gentlemen here have tried contacting me using just Jack's style (providing his 'own' references and when asked for his 'real' handle, you get the ol..."No I'm not a member of TER"), I know for a fact they were indeed part of this site just trying to pull a fast one. Problem is, I'm not a dummy. I may not have been here long, but I get the game playing and have seen and heard it all.  

Because of this lil game playing, I changed my screening habits last year. I now strictly use P411 only for this very reason so the info is right smack there in front of me. I just feel sorry for the guys who have wanted to see me and are not part of their site...unfortunately you can blame these kind of guys for this and why I think screening will only get more stringent for the ladies here who take screening seriously. If it means 'less' clients for me personally, then so be it, I can live with that. Thankfully, on the flipside, I've had gentlemen join p411 strictly just to meet, so it can work both ways. I'm not comfortable with anyone just hitting me up with an anonymous email, "hey, I wanna meet you, here are 'my' references. They just aren't good enough anymore cause they can be faked as well (had that happen too). A P411 verified member is the only way to go with okays in place so I can directly speak with the ladies who gave them. Period. That's the only way this works anymore...at least for me.  

Jack is proof of way TOO much game here. Don't give a crap what your 'reviews' state and what you do or don't want to happen in a session. It's the game playing that has to go. Nice try though.

I'm sorry. It's shady.  

-- Modified on 7/30/2014 2:54:52 PM

He most likely would not get a date. I can see both sides here, erring on the side of I would like to read a review or two, however, I am not one to put up with what I can't deal with and can say no and stand my ground.  

I am sure he says he is not comfortable giving that out and by that very fact might be screening enough. If he lies, well he lies and what can the lady do about that?  

If his reviews read like a rape scene well a good reason not to give out the review handle and I very much doubt that.  

Although I am sure his board persona is not like he is in real life, geez how many guys have we scared off ...lol. I mean the dude is ALL about our safety and that speaks volumes to me.

And then there is the john rejection factor. Some guys just can't deal with being rejected by a hooker. I know, I have has some interesting email exchanges with a few.



-- Modified on 7/30/2014 11:53:11 AM

Just their cups of tea  LOL

Others however may feel a tad intimidated.

Oh well...c'est la vie  ;)

I think that you (and many others) would be shocked...shocked I tell ya...to know how often unsolicited PM's end up in those inboxes.  

As you have posted, and I agree...something for everyone!

But I can tell you that over the years those that have contacted CPA would be those that most would never have expected.  It's a trip...to say the least.

Posted By: hbyist+truth=;(
He most likely would not get a date. I can see both sides here, erring on the side of I would like to read a review or two, however, I am not one to put up with what I can't deal with and can say no and stand my ground.  
   
 I am sure he says he is not comfortable giving that out and by that very fact might be screening enough. If he lies, well he lies and what can the lady do about that?  
   
 If his reviews read like a rape scene well a good reason not to give out the review handle and I very much doubt that.  
   
 Although I am sure his board persona is not like he is in real life, geez how many guys have we scared off ...lol. I mean the dude is ALL about our safety and that speaks volumes to me.  
   
 And then there is the john rejection factor. Some guys just can't deal with being rejected by a hooker. I know, I have has some interesting email exchanges with a few.  
   
 

-- Modified on 7/30/2014 11:53:11 AM

Hahahahahahahahahahahahaha, I think not. But deff what you said prior to that statement. How bout just plain ol' board assholes, period. Yep, that'll do it. Unsolicited PM's or not, still assholes. Again, period LOL.  

What's with the pumping up of 'CPA' as a 'good guy' all the sudden there Papa? Are you afraid of being placed in the same bucket as the 'other' wonderful gents here? Perhaps you should school them a bit on messing up your rep. But it's ok ya know. I still like you, asshole or not.  

;)

Nah....and where I the world am I not including CPA as a board asshole?

Posted By: Taylor Steele
Hahahahahahahahahahahahaha, I think not. But deff what you said prior to that statement. How bout just plain ol' board assholes, period. Yep, that'll do it. Unsolicited PM's or not, still assholes. Again, period LOL.  
   
 What's with the pumping up of 'CPA' as a 'good guy' all the sudden there Papa? Are you afraid of being placed in the same bucket as the 'other' wonderful gents here? Perhaps you should school them a bit on messing up your rep. But it's ok ya know. I still like you, asshole or not.  
   
 ;)

using 'CPA' in the 3rd person. It's freaking me out, so cut it.  

'Taylor' is going to have a cup of coffee now. (see, weird, so stop it already lol ;)

Smile today Papa. The sun is shining.

There are literally thousands of ladies out there who would gladly take his money regardless of what he writes on the internet, so why not just see one of them? It just seems like a tactic to knock a hooker down a peg for being selective. I dun like.

I can tell you that 90% of the guys I see don't review but I can still spot an asshole via email. Some are too darn good at hiding it and then, well we deal the best we can.  

Granted in Voodoo's case, had she been able to read the review she would not have met him and I will add, some hookers need a punch because they do not tell what is needed in a reference.  

I do, and it has nothing to do with a guys performance but his attitude, cleanliness, dick size if asked and the way he generally treated me. If the hookers had been more forthright with VD, she would not have seen him.

Some guys feel that if they reveal their reviews the hooker is going to get all judgy and reject him, therefore knocking him down a peg.

This is tough one and surprisingly I do see the guys POV. Good Lord does that mean I am going to lose my Man Hating Bitch card?????

they don't want to get into it on the boards but they figure I'm a prospect anyway....  

sometimes I've had providers argue with me tooth and claw and then contact me letting me know they would love to see me -   that usually intrigues me, and has always turned out to be a lot of fun -

I like a woman who will stand up on her hind legs and speak her mind - and I like a certain competitiveness or exchange of dominance sexually as well....

89Springer1510 reads

I use my alias for the forum, and my real handle for my reviews. I'd just rather have the ladies read my reviews, but not look at what I'm posting here. A few posts does not a john make, or something like that.  

Anyway, I did give one provider my alias, and I think it may have caused her to turn me down. In her PM to me she said I was a member of the group of assholes on the forum.  I don't think I've risen to that status. Putz sometimes, but not asshole.

JackDunphy1239 reads

I don't go thru the gals form mail so when I hit her up, I use her email and give my two rock solid refs from very well known women (more if she asks) and a verification site. No one to date has then said, after having all that other info from me,  "Can I have your board handle too please?" It just doesn't work that way Tobi, at least not for me.

And I would never say "I dont feel comfortable giving out that info" for that could/would set off a red flag in the gals mind. Girls don't demand the info so I don't give it, so to me, that isn't even close to a lie.  

I don't know how many girls demand something from a guy that he may not even have, right? Not everyone is an asshole hardcore hobbyist dick poster like me. lo

That's what you want us to think JD. I bet anything you are not at all like that when meeting a lady.  

I mean look at me for instance, I can come across as a female version of you just a hooker, but do you honestly think I could get away with that in real life?  

And all this coming from a man hating bitch hooker. ;)

I also don't think that outside of Robbin Young any hookers are using their "real names" on their sites.  If they want to put that info out there...maybe more guys would be fine with giving up their personal info as well.

I haven't had a problem yet...and I suspect you haven't either.

Just another reason why I stopped writing reviews a few years ago...more drama than Maury at times.

I prefer to use the back channel method to discuss gals and which ones are great...and those a monger would do well to keep his distance.  
 

Posted By: JackDunphy
I don't go thru the gals form mail so when I hit her up, I use her email and give my two rock solid refs from very well known women (more if she asks) and a verification site. No one to date has then said, after having all that other info from me,  "Can I have your board handle too please?" It just doesn't work that way Tobi, at least not for me.  
   
 And I would never say "I dont feel comfortable giving out that info" for that could/would set off a red flag in the gals mind. Girls don't demand the info so I don't give it, so to me, that isn't even close to a lie.  
   
 I don't know how many girls demand something from a guy that he may not even have, right? Not everyone is an asshole hardcore hobbyist dick poster like me. lol  
 

I agree that if she doesn't ask for it, you're under no obligation to offer that up. My question is IF a chick asks for that info (since you haven't come across that situation, then this is purely hypothetical), what would you say? Would you lie, say you don't want to divulge that, or just move on?

Posted By: JackDunphy
I don't go thru the gals form mail so when I hit her up, I use her email and give my two rock solid refs from very well known women (more if she asks) and a verification site. No one to date has then said, after having all that other info from me,  "Can I have your board handle too please?" It just doesn't work that way Tobi, at least not for me.  
   
 And I would never say "I dont feel comfortable giving out that info" for that could/would set off a red flag in the gals mind. Girls don't demand the info so I don't give it, so to me, that isn't even close to a lie.  
   
 I don't know how many girls demand something from a guy that he may not even have, right? Not everyone is an asshole hardcore hobbyist dick poster like me. lol  
 

JackDunphy1114 reads

Now by "right" girl" I mean a hypothetical "I have to see her before I die" kinda gal. Haven't had that happen yet but I cant rule it out.

And no, I don't think lying about my board persona would be a big deal at all. Most women lie about something in this biz whether its her age, her use of pics that aren't a fair representation of her, some Aldo magic, etc etc etc

Honestly Tobi, its none of the gals business to begin with. I understand why you and HT would WANT the info, and I may want it too if I were hooking, but is it essential info to the girl? Of course not

And treats a lady like shit during a session then yes, I want to know so I can pass

nothing but the truth."  Yes, Jack Nicholson said, "You can't handle the truth" to Tom Cruise.

how petty, how childish, and how mean spirited so many reviews are....  really downright misogynistic....  

I'd rather not write the review if I don't have some good things to say and there is no balance, except and unless it was a rip off situation or fake pics - and I've never encountered that yet....

and I take responsibility for what I bring to the session as well and how this affects the overall dynamic and experience...

I personally appreciate the providers I have seen and providers in general even on the occasion where we have not clicked as well as I might have liked and take at least my share of the responsibility for that....

and nit-picking the providers appearance just seems very inappropriate to me - we all have our preferences and our imperfections...

because I only concern myself with the reviews I am studying to make hobbying decisions of my own, or the ones I sometimes run into (but do not seek)  of ladies I have previously reviewed....

also I have been criticized by some for giving "inflated" reviews -   ironically in almost every case my reviews were right on the girls average....

I've seen so much bull shit regarding reviews I give them no credibility unless I know the reviewer. It is coming from all sides. Providers backlisting over less than great reviews or worse. Clients using them as leverage, real reviews reported as fake, providers reviewing themselves or paying for said review, favors for good reviews, threats off bad ones unless the lady does X, and more. How often do we read rants about grade inflation? Hell more than once I have seen a provider try to get a guy banned for giving her a 7/7. Even the guy your responding to will not post a bad review. Guys are afraid ladies will not see them if they review honesty. Then you got the free. VIP reviews. A friend of mine got three reviews after she retired.  

I think the review system here is broken. Fake reviews, unwritten reviews out of fear, inflated reviews all are common. I can't give a present but it isn't low. I no longer use reviews from guys I don't trust. Even then I backchannel to double check. Got burned too often putting to much faith in reviews. I cam do without the drama.

I feel a great many reviews are BS and honest reviews are with held do to review inflation. I don't know the total percentage of reviews that are not fully truthful but it is far to large. Large enough to taint the whole system. I do not trust the reviews here that was not written by someone I know. I have been let down far too often, seen to much manipulation to trust them.

Considerate, yet knows what he wants and knows the right way to get it. If I could take what you dish, you would be an ideal date!!!!!!!

...all odds are against him, yet he pulls through in the end. (I always liked Gary Cooper in High Noon as he personifies the one who was almost influence by what others said to throw fear into him, than changed by thinking the hell with that, I’m going to to stand on his own two feet and do what I know is best.)

I’m not alluding to hero, just those who stand their ground and believe in what they post and don’t waver, like this dude here that you like. A thumbs up

And the fact that he has the insight to at least empathize a little as to what some of us might deal with. He also comes across as understanding limitations and working with them, a huge plus in my book.  

He has his style that might not jibe with mine but he has never put me down for how I provide or for my limitations. That is huge on here.

Feeling valued then it’s all good

hbyist+oxxo=$

Was reading it wondering,  what does subtitles have to do with the hobby?  Rofl

of a group of our board posters standing around and "subtitling" someone's session. Struck me as potentially hilarious!!

I look for consistent scores. I really investigate the outliers, I want to know why someone gave her an exceptionally high or low score. Remember that on a scale of 1 to 10 that above 5 is above average.  

I am discovering that I have a body type, at least for now. that gets the next look. Then any hint that she uses drugs or sees guys that are high or intoxicated.

Then I read through the reviews, word for word, at least the last ten and include those that are above and below average. I want to get an idea of how good she is at reading her clients on a day to day basis. It is my fantasy, my money and my time and ultimately my memories, so if I am convinced that she can build a good session so far, I start considering attitude and scripting.  

I want to see words telling me why she has a great attitude. I want to see that the subsequent visits are not just a replay of the first.

I know you said reviews but the last thing I do is come back here and do a 1000 day or more search on her handle. I learned this the hard way. Again I want consistency.  

From someone that does not write well, above all in this shadow world, I want a feeling of honesty

Any mention of kids or unruly pets around

Other people in the house or apartment during the session

Signs of upsell tactics

Bad odors of any kind from any source

Illicit drug paraphernalia around the place

Her phone goes off during the session (especially if she answers it!)

Loud music or TV going on during the session

Any other actions that are indiscreet or dangerous

I know, bitch, bitch, bitch...8o)




I've enjoyed reading these great responses, but they pertain more to annoyance, rudeness, ignorance and anything that does not come across sincere.  

Even the positives like great attitude and the love of one’s work are anything but subtle.

According to the definition, it’s a very tough call

TalkToTrees914 reads

... in things good or bad.

1st example: In the reviews, if a provider is consistently late, a red flag for me. If someone can't manage their time, that person is not for me.

2nd example: Provider pictures are nothing but selfies, even worst when it's a high end provider. I just saw a TER ad recently for my area. So, I check out that provider's website, all pictures were selfies, but her pricing is high end. It's not the pricing that bothered me, it's all of those selfies that she took when she could have hired a professional photographer to take her pictures. That shows professionalism, not looking like a ghetto person.

3rd example: A provider who claims to have a calendar of where she is going to be at, but NEVER updates it. Why even bother with a calendar webpage if you aren't going to keep it up?

The Forest Waits
 

Posted By: SoftlySarah
In reviews, what are subtle things you look for that tell you to stay away from a provider or a client? There are of course the obvious things, like thieves, fake photos, B&S, etc. I'm not referring to those. I'm referring to reading between the lines to infer that this or that person is someone you do not want to meet. For instance, if a gent doesn't like hugs, maybe he avoids ladies whose reviews say that she's very affectionate or likes to cuddle. And maybe there are things that are even more subtle.  
   
 Likewise, what are some positive subtle things you look for in reviews? Things that tell you that this person would be a great match?

-- Modified on 7/30/2014 9:50:04 AM

I think we all got some perspective into the whys and hows reviews etc can make or break a choice to see or not see on both sides.

Lot don't. If it reads like porn movie, case closed. Nothing is believable in that case. In other cases, consistency

woman who enjoys foreplay, like to give and receive pleasure, good conversationalist, non-smoker, dresses well, courtesan, and aims to please.

Negatives would include everything mrfisher said plus smelled like an ashtray, incall was cluttered, not affectionate, tried to get the guy to come quickly, talks too much, and began getting dressed after round one with lots of time left on the clock.  

-- Modified on 7/30/2014 9:23:54 PM

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