I find it intrusive and bordering on an invasion of my privacy.

Although, ironically, the best restaurants in the world stay the fuck out of the personal business of their customers.  

That aside, the maître d' of Eleven Madison Park may google your name before you arrive for dinner. And, that may feel creepy and invasive.

BUT. On the upside, if he is as thorough as reported, he will also have reviewed your reviews, and will have the ideal provider of your dreams booked and waiting to ravish you as soon as you finish dinner.  

So, you don't need to share your alias when you make your dinner reservation. But it would seem prudent to share whether your dinner plans include your wife.  

Awkward. And, surprise!

that we now know. And that there are many restaurants to choose from. Good grief, what a creepy practice. If I want personalized, special treatment, I'll just call the restaurant in advance and tell them exactly what I want.

with a provider and be greeted by the matre'd with [directed at your date], "Hello Mrs. Monger, we see you are celebrating a birthday next week.  May we bring a small birthday cake to the table after your meal; on the house of course?"