If I'm in a serious relationship with the girl to the point of wanting to marry her, then that means it needs to be an exclusive relationship.
Casual dating / girlfriends, I have't lost touch with reality yet with the girl, so I don't think I'll have a fit over her hooking despite not liking it. For me, it would be a measure of how much I'm head over heels in love with the girl. If I'm ok with whatever she does, that just means I'm not head over heels in love with her. lol I guess some girls prefer a guy that isn't madly in love with her but then what the girl don't realize is how would a relationship like this actually progress to marriage if the guy doesn't give a shit enough about her to care about what she does. Just my train of thought...If she wished to become/stay a provider
She'd rate an 8/4, I'm sorry to say
nd just because you don't want her, I guarantee someone would.
And for a long time I've tried to work with her to rekindle things to no avail. Maybe it's true she needs someone else, someone different. YMMV is how it is, p4p or not...I guess I just don't know how to drive her so I get shitty mileage. C'est la vie.
Sorry, I don't suffer fools gladly.
She has no incentive to bullshit to you regarding her performance if she is not that into you anymore.
-- Modified on 3/29/2014 8:11:33 PM
You seem hell bent on connecting my issues with my wife to how one interacts with a provider. OMG, they're not the same? Thank you for that brillant insight! Dolt.
-- Modified on 3/29/2014 10:46:08 PM
Try sending her a PM see what happens. lol
o sorry that your wife is so ambivalent about you. Her performance score might have a direct correlation as to how tepid she thinks you are
Woman = awesome except for man that lacks what she needs, man = inept dickbrain that can't turn her on properly. No other possibilities in that narrow world view of yours, are there?
I always wish that a girl save me the bitchy drama if that's really her real personality.
As long as I'm paying I want some good acting skills come into play.... I don't care if it's acting as long as I'm convinced of the illusion. lol
suck it up for a hot minute...
8 in appearance isn't bad at all though, she is considered hot not just attractive. For me, appearance of a girl plays less of a role when her personality and chemistry outweighs. When seeing providers, I try to aim for a PYT 9 or 10 but in civvy relationships an 8 is perfectly good enough if other traits are in greater compatibility with me. Oddly, an 8 in looks could look a 9 and a 9 could look a 10 once I'm really madly in love with the girl, but that's a different topic.
Lack of performance can stink, but that is something very very trainable don't you think? Maybe you can teach her some new tricks, toss her around in bed try some new positions, and see if she likes it.
I'd be a lot happier if I didn't want to fuck her
-- Modified on 3/29/2014 8:55:20 PM
which should not be a consideration.
Now if people are involved in a relationship, there has to be communication and agreements, but that is a different matter.
There are several people in the hobby who are married and their spouses are OK with what they do, which is all that matters.
My wife was a provider and if she wanted to go back, that is her business. What makes her happy is what I care about.
I was privileged to be there, as I know the groom, the bride and the Best Man. One of the Bridesmaids was a drag queen dressed as a fairy. Oh, and it was on a beach on the Gulf of Mexico.
Now if people are involved in a relationship, there has to be communication and agreements, but that is a different matter.
There are several people in the hobby who are married and their spouses are OK with what they do, which is all that matters.
My wife was a provider and if she wanted to go back, that is her business. What makes her happy is what I care about.
My GF when I was in college was a sexual dynamo, she asked me if we could do a DP for her, at the time I was way more possessive or should I say insecure than I am today, but eventually I agreed. I've never seen a woman cum like that anywhere else in my life. She was my first Greek and honestly the best Greek I've ever had, but she wanted it and truely got off on it. I mean to tell you, this woman came from her toes all the way up to her head, ya just gotta love a woman that goes after and gets hers
"if all dudes were like mrfisher there would be no wars?"
-- Modified on 3/29/2014 4:28:12 PM
I'm confused as well but I think that was what he was posting.
It seems when I post UI of Bourbon I'm consistently misinterpreted, go figure huh?. What I meant to convey is that what badcollegegirl said is true, if all guys were like mrfisher and didn't let that stupid ego bullshit get in the way that there wouldn't be wars. Jealousy and insecurity Suck! We don't OWN anyone else, that's a fucking stupid concept.
What I was attempting to convey, is that my ex GF in college wanted to do a DP to experience it and because she knew she'd get off on it. Initially I was resistant to it because I was insecure that she'd want to leave me to be with another man, when in fact she just wanted to experience the sexual thrill of being DP'd by two men. She stayed with me until I graduated, I was a year ahead of her, and we went our separate ways. I wish I'd been secure enough back then to suggest a gang bang with her, this woman could make you cum without even touching her, she orgasmed unlike any other woman I've ever met, as if she were orgasming from her soul.
A woman should not wait for the man to get her off, she should go after her own orgasm just like we do. I get that some women like to have the man take charge and make her cum, but no woman should have to not get off because the guy could get her there, she should get hers too.
and by the way DA, just in case you didn't read the post last weekend when I was asking what I should do since I killed the last shot in my existing bottle of Makers Mark, I was trying to be silly (DWP drinking while posting) and I was referencing an old wives tale that if you purchase the last shot in a bottle at a bar, you're supposed to get the first shot in the next bottle. My point was definitely lost because of the lapse in time, but since you're a drunken Asian I thought you might get it. Oh well, not the first time I've had to explain my humor, I'm a nerd, still to this day. My handle should be drunken nerd.
You have to keep "spice" in your life as long as he's happy he will make sure that your happy ..... you will never have worry about the rest!!! there going to do it regardless right lol. so why not make things easier for him and just tell him you love him. To enjoy him self and be safe.... I guess that's my opinion people are going to do what there going to do. why sweat the small stuff... If you end up finding a really great guy that only wants you well you are a winner and so is he.... just because your a fun time in bed and satisfy every and all of his needs doesn't mean he's not still a guy and wants to explore every once in a while. it's 2014 not 1950 the world is full of lust and excitement explore it !!!!
Sorry I know that was totally off the original subject but that's what went threw my head when I read the op I hope every one out there is enjoying every day that they have because
1. Tomorrow is not guaranteed
&
2. Life is way to short to limit your self.
Every day in Las Vegas since I have joined ter has been an adventure for me some better than others but at the end of the day I can truly say that I'm HAPPY
Have fun every one and may every one of your fantasies come true
Xxxo kayden
Ps sorry for any misspelled words or punctuation I sent this from my iPhone
You are mature beyond your years. I took the promise seriously and never cheated while we were together. I say that and evidently I didn't take the promise too seriously as I did divorce her. But, honestly some people don't make good spouses, and I'm one of those people. A good friend of mine told me that the perfect woman for me would be a Flight Attendant and I agree, I'd have no problem being faithful to a woman, I just don't want someone in my face 24/7 of any week, ok maybe the week of the holiday's I could suffer through but be gone after the first. The hobby is perfect for a selfish bastard like me, I get my fun and affection when I want it on my terms. Kayden, you already know this I'm sure but you are so pretty and so sexy. See you soon.
In all seriousness, I'm doubting I'd be cool with sharing a girl I'm in a serious relationship with considering I'm on the conservative side. The more accurate stance on it would be that I'm split on it because I'm understanding of the hobby and that this is just 'work' for majority of providers, but then the conservative side of me kicks in the more serious the relationship becomes.
If she allows me to hobby while she's providing then I guess I may reluctantly think it could work out, but the issue isn't about "you're doing this so I can do this too". It's about why she'd want to provide when she's in a serious relationship with me, living under my roof, and I'm taking care of all the bills already. There's also some risk of running into crazy guys , running into LE.
I think it's going to take some effort for me to plan a future with the girl, family planning, if she's hooking on the side. But if she's just a girlfriend (not a wife) then I'm probably going to be reluctantly cool about it.
Either way, if we're struggling for money, I'm probably going to accept it whether I like it or not. Still wouldn't like it but it's better than being broke and depressed.
However, I don't mind if she brings some of her girl friends to spice things up a bit though. If she wants to fool around with other girls, in the same bed with me, I'm all for it!
-- Modified on 3/29/2014 9:05:02 PM
relationship with a provider. To the extent that the commitments we have made to each other and the relationship itself remains paramount... then yes.
I would most likely have to be so head over heels in love with her that I would have lost all reason. So it makes sense that I would be so head over heel in love with her that I wouldn't want to share her with anybody.
Yes, go ahead and call me a selfish pig, but you asked.
Now in the real world where I have not lost complete touch with reality and done something as stupid as having gotten myself married again, I can and have lived quite happily with an active provider, and I would expect I could do so again.
If I'm in a serious relationship with the girl to the point of wanting to marry her, then that means it needs to be an exclusive relationship.
Casual dating / girlfriends, I have't lost touch with reality yet with the girl, so I don't think I'll have a fit over her hooking despite not liking it.
For me, it would be a measure of how much I'm head over heels in love with the girl. If I'm ok with whatever she does, that just means I'm not head over heels in love with her. lol I guess some girls prefer a guy that isn't madly in love with her but then what the girl don't realize is how would a relationship like this actually progress to marriage if the guy doesn't give a shit enough about her to care about what she does. Just my train of thought...
There's only one exception: if I say I'm marrying a hooker who will continue to, er, hook. And, yes, it's a hypothetical but it might even be right.
But if I were to find a SO again, it would be a woman that I could go to a Swingers party with and at the end of the night she goes home with me. We fuck other people during the course of the evening, because it's just sex and we go home together because we have an emotional attachment with each other, we love each other. OK, I realize I may be a little out there, perhaps a lot, but the woman I give my heart to next will have my total undying trust, or I won't go there. If my SO sees a hot guy, and wants to get fucked by him, who the hell am I to say she shouldn't (safe of course)? And same with me, if I meet a woman in the hotel bar while on business, why shouldn't I fuck her, if that's all I'm after is the sex?
How about being so head over heels in love with her that you trusted her so emphatically that she could be with other men and women just for sexual pleasure but always come home with you. How awesome would that be? I've only had that once, early in life, and I've been searching for that ever since. We don't know what we have until it's gone.
A husband and wife are two people faithful to each other. Breach that definition, and they are no longer in that contract.
Like thought:
"Have you heard of killing a king?"
"I have heard of killing a thief, but I have never heard of killing a king."
Office or status is not defined by title, but by behavior.
I have never heard of that idiom before. Is it assuming that the king is a thief?
unless you DO NOT live in a monarchy.
First of all, your version of "faithful" is fine for you. Just don't impose it on anyone else. There are lots of happily-married couples who swing, or one provides, and they still love each other. Monogamy is just not part of their contract.
As for your killing the king line, it makes no sense. Lots of kings have been killed. They even have a term for it: regicide.
And if office or status is defined by behavior, well, I behave in a very regal manner. So why am I not King?
and yes, you make MUCH more sense when you have enough alcohol in your system. You tend to get rather lame when sober. Thankfully that is only a few hours a day.
As for WB, speaking in platitudes doesn't seem to work any better for him than swallowing a thesaurus works for Dupy, or just plain mangling the English language works for AF.
As for you, nice to see you back at full strength, I worry about you when you have extended periods of sobriety.
I needed to stay sober to do justice to a wonderful girl whose name you know from my PM. I didn't want any alcohol to diminish the sensation of her tongue-stud-enhanced BBBJ.
But now I am working on my second triple vodka (rocks only) and I'll agree it enhances my posting skills. Still, even sober I am more than a match for you, fucker!
PS: Were those really "platitudes" WB was speaking in? I thought it was simply incoherent babble.
and I see that now you are back in the states you have reverted back to your old habits of "no drunk fucking"
Oh well, as long as you remember that rule doesn't extend to posting, you'll be just fine.
just a bit of an esoteric historical analogy about contracts. Actually, very esoteric. lol
I suggest drinking more quickly.
Kind of like this.
-- Modified on 3/29/2014 11:14:16 PM
A lady at my work is a recovering alcoholic (AA member), she's an awesome woman, I consider her a friend. But I have no need or desire to drink coffee with her at a fucking meeting, it would just cut into my drinking time, and of all the things I am, a hypocrite is not one of them. Please excuse me, my Bourbon glass needs to be refilled.
I answered the question in terms of how it was asked, of how I'd react. My way of reacting to things have frequently gone against the tide of popular thought, dating from the years of getting rid of the draft, Jim Crow, and the miscegenation laws to the resistance to war in Iran.
The quote that mystified so many is the Mandate of Heaven, something anyone who took a Comparative Religions course in a junior college should remember. Confucius was born around 550 BC, so the "king" reference was natural to the time. If the king conducts himself as a king, serving the good of the people, he was a king. Why dispose of him? If not, if he was concerned with lining his own pockets, he was not truly a king, therefore a thief, therefore the people would naturally want to rid themselves of him. It is a way of ethical thinking. Not everyone buys into it.
So to spell out the thought comparison would be,
"Have you heard of divorcing a wife?"
"I have heard of divorcing a whore, but I have never heard of divorcing a wife."
No, I have not been drinking. No, I don't wish to impose my standards on others any more than I want others to impose theirs on me.
What was your other worry...? Another time.
As for your killing the king line, it makes no sense. Lots of kings have been killed. They even have a term for it: regicide.
And if office or status is defined by behavior, well, I behave in a very regal manner. So why am I not King?
We're divorced so I don't much care. Just so the guys know though, blow jobs for her are just to lube up, never as a seperate sex act. She sure does like her daty to completion though. What in the Hell was I thinking when I married that woman? Apparently, I wasn't.
its very hard to imagine how one would react if and when the actual situation arises...
All I can say is, I don't know..
If I were still married and my wife wanted to become a provider, I probably wouldn't be cool with that, as it changes the fundamentals of the relationship.
OTOH, if I met a woman who was a provider, fell in love, and we wanted to marry, that would be okay. We're going into it knowing that's her job.
A big factor is my age. I wouldn't have been able to handle that when I was younger, as I had the typical male hangups: some guys are bigger than me; some guys are better than me. Now, at my age, I know that most guys are bigger and better than me, so who cares? If she comes home to me, then it would be great.
Ain't gonna happen, though. Not too many 50+ year-old providers. And I'm never going to marry again.
I'm not married but have been, twice. The first one is so long ago I can't even imagine it. The second one is recent and we're still friends. She's become highly sexed and I've told her that the screening skills she's developed on various dating sites would serve her well if she became a hooker. I've even offered to help pimp her out (for free, so I guess it's not really pimping). She's older but very pretty and lots of younger guys are turned on by mature women. She says no, but who knows? Maybe when she's 60? I'll still help her.
Sorry, but sometimes I just can't resist straight lines when they are teed up so nice and purty. lol
On looks, from what I can tell of Tardlor's selfies, it's probably a tie. On performance, my ex would blow her away. She's a squirting, cock-worshiping sexaholic. Too bad she's also impossible to live with.
As for Tardlor's selfies, I will keep my comments to myself. Or at least I won't say anything about them publicly.
No chance !
Why would I want to inflict that misery on others lol
Some other hot wife, no problem sharing. Sounds like fun. You, I'd want all to myself. 😈
If it meant us somehow connecting more, then yes. But she's too uptight and upright to even consider doing it for P4P with anyone.
If she did want to, somehow by some stretch of the imagination, she'd be a 5-6 appearance and a 9 service (if she did it at all).
Just don't expect multiple pops or more than one appt every 2 - 3 weeks.