i appreciate all your info, but was trying to figure out a best way to tell a provider that i am not interested, without making it weird. sometimes you get a provider and they are not what they seem in their adds or on the phone. most of the time, i just pay and chalk it up to experience. i just was wondering how other people handle this kind of situation. i know in that it is really up to me, since i am the one paying for it.
whats the best way to handle a provider that you do not fill comfortable with or want to be with, when you get there. should you leave some money for the hassle, if so how much? or should you just say no thank you and walk out and some of the providers get really upset and scary.
Is there anything about you that she did not know before you got there, and was a surprise? Or she just had a mood swing and decided she didn't want to see. you. The answer could largely depend on the details.
Both is possible. Former is more likely I would at least give her some money, if I feel that I have wronged and I should have said such and such thing, which I didn't, and she is right in not feeling comfortable to see me. If its latter.. Not one cent...
Also, if she is feeling sick or something bad like that, I can help her get the necessary aid. Even give her a ride to hospital.
she wasn't comfortable with him. Though one could be the result of the other. So who got uncomfortable first I wonder?
In my opinion:
1. If you feel you've been mislead, as hard as it may feel, you should be strong enough to say "I'm sorry, I don't feel comfortable, you claimed this, this and this, and it's not the case, so I'd rather not go through with this. In case of misleading, I wouldn't think a "hassle" compensation should be done, otherwise it's a reward for misleading. It was about HER and not you.
2. If it's more that you changed your mind, a small token would help. If the reason you don't want to be there anymore is more about YOU rather than her.
I've always had this concern that if I just walk out without paying her anything(even if she misled me) , I'd me a little concerned about my safety. After all, she's already engaging in one illegal activity. What if she has a gun or has a male friend nearby? Sometimes I think it's better to suck it up and leave without any trouble. Chances I have a lot more to lose if it escalated.
Prostitution is illegal, but it by no means correlates with another illegal activity for women who are doing this as a profession that needs to be sustainable.
After almost 1 year of doing this, I think I can spot unsafe conditions, or at least fringe ones.
1. If she has no reviews
2. If she doesn't ask for references
3. If the only way to contact her is through phone - i.e. ad says: NO TEXTS, NO EMAILS, NO PRIVATE NUMBERS, ONLY PHONE CALLS
4. If the area is incredibly shady
These CAN lead to dangerous situations, all bets are off.
If she, however, does have reviews then a gun or violence is less likely. If she doesn't have reviews then she will work hard to come off as professional as possible to make up for the fact that she doesn't have reviews. Not that reviews are the be all and end all, but they should be used to alleviate your concern for safety, so girls should aim to at least have one.
If things escalate, you'll know right away, but you should try to stick to your guns and walk out within 5 minutes.
If you are worried that the escorts you are seeing have a gun I would say you are seeing the wrong escorts.
If it's just a matter of not feeling comfortable, no chemistry, or simply falling "out of the mood" after meeting her, some type of cancellation few "might" be in order.
OTOH in the event of B&S, or some other fraud committed by the lady in question, or if she advertises as a "high end provider" with commensurate prices and you find yourself in the projects scared to leave your car unattended, then all bets are off, turn around, get the fuck out of there and don't look back. I am a firm believer in not "rewarding bad behavior" it only encourages more of the same.
You are the only one who can be the judge of whether you "just aren't feeling it" or if you've been lied to. IMO if she has done nothing wrong and it's "all you" then yes, she deserves something for her time, but if she has lied to you, don't lose a minute of sleep for just turning around and walking out the door
She asks you to go, then you should owe nothing.
If you decide to leave, then a token amount to compensate her for the inconvenience would be in order.how much that token amount should be, depends on the circumstances...did she travel, did she book a room just for you, etc.
I only walked out on a client once as an independent. I had driven over 90 minutes to see him. But he seemed high. And he asked me questions I did not feel were well-mannered or appropriate. So I left 15 min in...I never asked for a fee nor was I offered one.
Get VIP and use it, you got out unscathed so just consider it a learning experience. Going forward research and communicate. Ask questions here and your local board. Weigh the advice you get based on experience, in other words if I were you I would , put more weight on Cossette than me but above all be safe and have fun. There is no excuse for multiple bad experiences. I read the reviews you posted.
You live in a major city, and also a city (Phoenix) that has some major crackdowns on prostitution. You have many other options besides BP, seeing un reviewed, and obvious scams like your first review shows, it hugely dangerous to both your life and liberty.
I don't know if you tend to see lower end women because of budgetary concerns, but you are playing with fire seeing these low end girls if you don't do a very good job of vetting them, and yes any experienced monger here could have told you that you were going to get ripped off on that first women you reviewed after even glancing at the ad.
We have a newbie board here, I think it would be a great idea if you spent a little time there and on your regional board, it could possibly save you a lot of grief in the future. Good luck, I don't mean any of this to sound harsh, just a genuine concern for your health and safety.
i appreciate all your info, but was trying to figure out a best way to tell a provider that i am not interested, without making it weird. sometimes you get a provider and they are not what they seem in their adds or on the phone. most of the time, i just pay and chalk it up to experience. i just was wondering how other people handle this kind of situation. i know in that it is really up to me, since i am the one paying for it.
You are tacitly encouraging them to keep on doing the same thing to every other guy who answers their ads.
None of these women are going to change a damn thing unless they are forced to. If every swinging dick had a pair of balls to go with it, and guys would all just walk out the door without leaving a single solitary cent to these ROB's maybe, just maybe they would stop doing it?
Ok rant over, it's just wishful thinking anyhow. Guys standing up for themselves is about as likely as hookers forming a union, it's just not going to happen on a large scale. Do what ever the fuck you want, but remember you aren't doing your fellow mongers any favor by caving to these bitches.
scammers just continue to lie. Having that said I wouldn't argue, just tell her calmly she's not as advertised and that you don't feel you can stay, then walk out. No need to pay scammers
If you have done your homework and read reviews, looked at pics or had multiple email exchanges - and you show up to a date and decide that 'eh, no, not feeling it' then you need to compensate with something before you turn on your heels. Established providers put much energy and time into their profession and I think, deserve a bit of respect.
However, like previous posters have said, if she has done something to boldly and openly deceive you, then leave. With me, my ads are 'what you see is what you get'.
Do you still give them "tribute"???
I say No Fucking Way, if the bitch lied, she isn't getting shit from me. and yes if she lied, a bitch is one of the nicest things I can say about her.
Please don't make up the rules as you go along and then pounce on people because they don't follow them. That's why you are viewed as stupid.
a potentially dangerous or nasty situation. Not everyone is as savvy and vetted as you and I'm not being sarcastic at all.
And we don't know if he's married or not. A single guy with nothing to hide like you can be a lot more ballsy than a married guy who's a newbie.
I'm sure you've heard of guys being in a situation where they try to leave and some pimpy "bodyguard" dude comes in a threatens him if he tries to leave with the money, or the woman has his info and threatens to expose him if he doesn't leave the money. When you are dealing with some scammers you don't know what's really going on. She or her nearby pimp could have a weapon. I know these are some what far fetched or the worse case scenario but to a guy wanting to exit without a big problem leaving a small cancellation token might be the difference between an easy exit or a big problem.
So I'm going to say $25 bucks and recommend the OP just say he changed his mind and this should happen in the first 2-3 minutes.
Steph
Then pay her for her time!