Not sure if this has been posted, I did to a search before posting.....Not sure if this is the right forum, if not, plz don't yell at me!!

Great Military Comebacks

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When in England at a fairly large conference, Colin Powell was asked by
the Archbishop of Canterbury if our plans for Iraq were just an example
of empire building by George Bush.

He answered by saying, 'Over the years, the United States has sent many
of its fine young men and women into great peril to fight for freedom
beyond our borders. The only amount of land we have ever asked for in
return is enough to bury those that did not return.

It became very quiet in the room.

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Then there was a conference in France where a number of international
engineers were taking part, including French and American. During a
break one of the French engineers came back into the room saying 'Have
you heard the latest dumb stunt Bush has done? He has sent an aircraft
carrier to Indonesia to help the tsunami victims. What does he intended
to do, bomb them?'

A Boeing engineer stood up and replied quietly: 'Our carriers have three
hospitals on board that can treat several hundred people; they are
nuclear powered and can supply emergency electrical power to shore
facilities; they have three cafeterias with the capacity to feed 3,000
people three meals a day, they can produce several thousand gallons of
fresh water from sea water each day, and they carry half a dozen
helicopters for use in transporting victims and injured to and from
their flight deck.. We have eleven such ships; how many does France
have?'

Once again, dead silence.

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A U.S. Navy Admiral was attending a naval conference that included
Admirals from the U.S., English, Canadian, Australian and French navies.
At a cocktail reception, he found himself standing with a large group of
officers that included personnel from most of those countries. Everyone
was chatting away in English as they sipped their drinks but a French
admiral suddenly complained that, 'whereas Europeans learn many
languages, Americans learn only English.' He then asked, 'Why is it that
we always have to speak English in these conferences rather than
speaking French?'

Without hesitating, the American Admiral replied 'Maybe it's because the
Brits, Canadians, Aussies and Americans arranged it so you wouldn't have
to speak German.'

You could have heard a pin drop

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AND THIS STORY FITS RIGHT IN WITH THE ABOVE

A group of Americans, retired teachers, recently went to France on a
tour. Robert Whiting, an elderly gentleman of 83, arrived in Paris by
plane.

At French Customs, he took a few minutes to locate his passport in his
carry on. "You have been to France before, monsieur?" the customs
officer asked sarcastically.

Mr. Whiting admitted that he had been to France previously.

"Then you should know enough to have your passport ready."

The American said, "The last time I was here, I didn't have to show it."


"Impossible. Americans always have to show your passports on arrival in
France!"

The American senior gave the Frenchman a long hard look. Then he quietly
explained. "Well, when I came ashore at Omaha Beach on D-Day in '44 to
help liberate this country, I couldn't find any damn Frenchmen to show
it to."