I always look at the donation as one of the first things when checking out a new provider. Too low scares me off faster than too high. This theory applies to just about anything else you are paying for, from hand tools to a new vehicle. Sounds to me like you already know that.
I think your donations are very reasonable and I hope I can see you in june or july. I will be in touch.
Becca, why does this surprise you ? It is just the nature of the hobby, just like everything else. I sell many things on Craigslist, Etsy, Ebay and other outlets and everyday I am approached by someone trying to get me to lower my price or give them something for free, without even seeing the product in person. Whether it's a $900 show quality puppy, a $5 barnyard chick or a $3k car, it's just how it goes. Why would it be any different in this line of business? These men are buying a service just like anything else. And oftentimes they want to try to get a deal or reduced rate. And they figure it doesn't hurt to try. Be honest, I am sure you have gone to buy a car or something else and you offer or ask for a lower price. I know I sure have, many times. You just need to brush it off, move on and not take it personally. It happens in any line of business nowadays, NOT just the hobby lifestyle. I don't seem to have this happen to me in the hobby, but maybe that's because I only do my advertising on P411 and I don't advertise in other outlets. Maybe, you are advertising in the wrong forums or websites and maybe you are not attracting the type of clientele you feel you deserve? If it gets to the point where it's really irritating you then maybe you should not advertise in WI anymore. It's just negative energy that you don't need.
I definitely agree she shouldn't take it personally. Though I can see why it could bother her if it happens so frequently in one particular place. Once in a blue moon someone haggling me is amusing but if it happened frequently it might leave a bad taste in my mouth too. Her taking a break from using certain sites for WI might be better than taking a break from advertising in WI altogether though.
Sending positive vibes to Becca.
I don't get aggravated when someone just asks for a lower rate, it never hurts to ask. Its the disrespect, rudeness, harassment, begging, etc that I experience here. I've been to much poorer places and don't get 75% of my contacts trying to lower my rates then harassing me, putting me down and begging when I politely tell them I don't lower my rates. 75%. This happens no where else. I'm NOT talking about simply asking to lower my rate...that happens quite a bit and IS the nature of the business. This doesn't bother me in the least. It never hurts to ask. When a guy doesn't take "NO" for an answer and begs and tries to treat me like a dollar store item it becomes ridiculous. If I say no, it's no. I've even had promises like "I'll be a regular if you see me at 150/hr." or "I'll write a great review if you see me for less and it will help your business" Of course these things happen elsewhere. I can bet my last dollar that every time I post an ad in Wisconsin it will happen 2 to 5 times a day.
It isn't the places I advertise...These guys find me on Eros, RS2K, P411 and anywhere else. I no longer bother with the lower end sites. My advertising is the same as everywhere else and at most, when I travel, about 10 to 20 % of my contacts ask to lower my rate.
The way I seen it from my 10 years in the hobby and based in Milwaukee/Chicago, I accept the fact that that's the hobby culture in Wisconsin. I expect to weed through the nonsense, it's almost like I have a BP ad out or something. After I weed through the nonsense and ignore the harassment, I do get great clients and truly appreciate them. Wisconsin has great guys. My advice for ladies traveling here is to be patient, you'll deal with BP-like nonsense without a BP-ad. The guys you do see are normally great. Don't let the nonsense overshadow them.
On the flip side, because the hobby culture is like this, I've been told by many great providers though out the years that they refuse to visit Wisconsin...some because of what others said they experienced, others because of their personal experiences. When i visit other cities, I notice the difference in the time I spend going back an forth with guys that want to lower my rate. I've learned to put up with these guys. Other ladies don't have to and really, do they have a reason to?
I'm used to weeding through all the nonsense, I'm still here!! I don't have to, I, like any provider, can only visit cities where it's easy for me to hobby and have less nonsense to weed through. Other providers aren't so patient or used to it so they don't visit here. I have gotten calls from girls visiting for the first time that are in culture shock over this. Most don't return. Their response is usually something like "I can work in XYZ cities and not have to put up with this." They have a point.
I have noticed this for 10 years, it's gotten worse in recent years. Like I said, simply asking for a lower rate isn't the issue...that's not a problem. It never hurts to ask. Begging, harassing and disrespecting me because I won't lower my rate is the problem. Not all things are negotiable.
If these men are harassing and doing disrespecting behavior because you don't lower your rates that's inexcusable and just plain rude. I am sorry that you are dealing with that. I don't travel/tour or provides services in other cities, so I didn't know it's better elsewhere. I am very low volume and only advertise in one area, so maybe that's some of the reason I haven't been contacted by those jerks. Like I said earlier shrug it off and move on, your rates are not high and don't let anyone tell you they are.
Posted By: beccablossoms
I don't get aggravated when someone just asks for a lower rate, it never hurts to ask. Its the disrespect, rudeness, harassment, begging, etc that I experience here. I've been to much poorer places and don't get 75% of my contacts trying to lower my rates then harassing me, putting me down and begging when I politely tell them I don't lower my rates. 75%. This happens no where else. I'm NOT talking about simply asking to lower my rate...that happens quite a bit and IS the nature of the business. This doesn't bother me in the least. It never hurts to ask. When a guy doesn't take "NO" for an answer and begs and tries to treat me like a dollar store item it becomes ridiculous. If I say no, it's no. I've even had promises like "I'll be a regular if you see me at 150/hr." or "I'll write a great review if you see me for less and it will help your business" Of course these things happen elsewhere. I can bet my last dollar that every time I post an ad in Wisconsin it will happen 2 to 5 times a day.
It isn't the places I advertise...These guys find me on Eros, RS2K, P411 and anywhere else. I no longer bother with the lower end sites. My advertising is the same as everywhere else and at most, when I travel, about 10 to 20 % of my contacts ask to lower my rate.
The way I seen it from my 10 years in the hobby and based in Milwaukee/Chicago, I accept the fact that that's the hobby culture in Wisconsin. I expect to weed through the nonsense, it's almost like I have a BP ad out or something. After I weed through the nonsense and ignore the harassment, I do get great clients and truly appreciate them. Wisconsin has great guys. My advice for ladies traveling here is to be patient, you'll deal with BP-like nonsense without a BP-ad. The guys you do see are normally great. Don't let the nonsense overshadow them.
On the flip side, because the hobby culture is like this, I've been told by many great providers though out the years that they refuse to visit Wisconsin...some because of what others said they experienced, others because of their personal experiences. When i visit other cities, I notice the difference in the time I spend going back an forth with guys that want to lower my rate. I've learned to put up with these guys. Other ladies don't have to and really, do they have a reason to?
I'm used to weeding through all the nonsense, I'm still here!! I don't have to, I, like any provider, can only visit cities where it's easy for me to hobby and have less nonsense to weed through. Other providers aren't so patient or used to it so they don't visit here. I have gotten calls from girls visiting for the first time that are in culture shock over this. Most don't return. Their response is usually something like "I can work in XYZ cities and not have to put up with this." They have a point.
I have noticed this for 10 years, it's gotten worse in recent years. Like I said, simply asking for a lower rate isn't the issue...that's not a problem. It never hurts to ask. Begging, harassing and disrespecting me because I won't lower my rate is the problem. Not all things are negotiable.
Because your rates look very common for WI and like you said for being a known porn star they are a little low.
Imo your solution might be to raise your rates a little.
It is also weird tho that you don't get this treatment anywhere else tho...i'm sure that's a little disheartening with this being your home-base.
In any case I do agree it's not a total problem if they ask but it sounds like a few guys need to be able to take no/rejection with a lot more grace.
there is another forum for Wisconsin that I won't mention by name. I haven't been there in years but it was full of men who basically wanted Victoria's Secret models with pornstar talents at streetwalker prices.
For me if a lady has donations that are too high I look for someone that I can afford. And I have met some great ones!
That's exactly how it should be
I never post there because too many guys from there were telling me that $250/hour was too high when I charged that rate. SMH. lol
Guys who think they're God's gift to women and they should always get their way. If I don't like a providers rates I just move on.
It's annoying but some guys can't resist chasing that high if they get it once (as pathetic as it may be). ESPECIALLY if they'd had success with a lady who turned down their haggling attempts before but then eventually gave in.
One thing tho I dunno if there's a standard "bp girl" rate because I know ladies 1000+ minimums who regularly use BP. BUT then again there's a difference in "BP girl" and a 'BP advertiser'.
I never every attempt to negotiate a lower price. If I did get a lower price, I would be expecting lower service. If the price is too high for what I see, then I move on. With that said, the Chicago market is very saturated.... lots to choose from. Milwaukee is an economically depressed town, so not a lot of money there to spread around. Now this might be difficult for you to read, but for a gal that's over 40 that doesn't "stand out", I think 300 would be a reasonable rate (IMHO). Guys like fresh faces and/or exotic things. For some guys, it's greek (not me), for some it's implants and tattoos and piercings. For some, it's hard bodies. I typically never see someone more than once unless she gets some new tattoos, new piercings, new boobs, or if she has some really great talents that stand out. Want to stand out? Have a body or talent that stands out. Every guy likes something, some like a visual "stand out", such as big implants, tattoos, piercings (boobs or pussy), or super hard body Maxim style muscles. Some guys like a "stand out" talent like greek, or DT queen, or super submissive, or super dominant. For some guys, its a fresh face (so you would have to tour other places). The whole thing is a lot like the porn biz, if you don't stand out or if your not a fresh face, you fall off the radar and you end up getting low bids.
Wisconsin people are CHEAP CHEAP CHEAP. It's everywhere, not just this biz. But it's indicative of our economy in general. I can get a cocktail for $3.50-$4 here, but I'll pay $8 in LA.
I travel a lot, and there are many (most?) places where $150-$200 is standard. A few places the norm is $300, but that's on the higher end. Check out ads from different parts of the country and you'll see I'm right.
I have only seen Becca once and found her to be pleasant and friendly. I would never think to ask a lady to lower her fees. If I were to find her fees to high, I'd look elsewhere, or see if the higher fees reflect a better service. So in that respect I agree with you, Becca
at first i was thinking that you shouldn't be too surprised by a few bad apples until i read that it's 75%!! that's awful to hear that you get this the majority of time. i hope guys read this and realize that this isn't cool. it's one thing to ask once, fine... but don't keep bothering her after she says no. do you guys haggle at the grocery store? gas station? no... becuz those are goods. why do people think that just b/c somebody offers a service YOU get to set the price? do you haggle your doctor or accountant? or your barber?
cars and real estate are different cuz they kind of expect some kind of negotiating dance to happen so that's reflected in the initial offer. those examples are few.
sorry i couldn't offer some kind of solution. hopefully guys read this and wake up. you ladies are doing a great thing and i hate hearing stories like this.
