Interesting question. And as taboo as it may seem, you just keep on bonding. Ultimately, what most hobbyists want is a connection and most hobbyists are as lonely as you sound, whether they are married or not or whether they admit it or not. You providers really hold all the cards, whether you admit it or not. Bonding is at very least - human, and at most - good business.
It may seem tragic at first glance - that is, you would think that the only men that would not be judgmental of your professional decisions are the very men that professionalism dictates you NOT connect with. But that is probably not true. I would venture to guess that although a former hobbyist-boyfriend would not have a moral right to be jealous, the nature of jealousy lies in the ego of the jealous party, not in the superego of what is morally right. Maybe that is why many providers have "girlfriends" - all the emotional connection and half of the jealousy.
Unfortunately, I will not get the pleasure of meeting you in person until I am 35 . . . lol!
I have always been very curious about the experiences of other providers and hobbyists . When I see someone over a period of time, I tend to really bond. Hobbyist bond too (that's why they keep seeing us..lol..)I know, should I meet a soulmate again, I will meet him in my business. I can be myself, wouldn't have to hide who I truly am and can look forward to an open relationship( Yes...I will continue to need my excitement, will want to share and meet other new people intimatly, him included ). How close do you allow yourself to get? Any stories of "provider meets hobbyist" and lives happily ever after! Am I opening a can of worms or a box of chocolates??? Starina
We always hear stories about why this never works. I don't know that it does. But I fall in love with quite a few of the ladies. Yes I am a fool and maybe I get taken advantage of every once in a while. But sometimes these girls like me and we have fun and become friends. I am not married and I have got to tell you I have some of the most beautiful friends a person could have. On the outside and on the inside.
I used to do massages in Las Vegas. I had a girlfriend who also was a massage therapist and we would have lunch or dinner together every day. I can still remember sitting in a restaurant with her, eating key lime pie when her cell phone rang. A guy from the Flamingo Hilton called and wanted a massage. She called me the next day, said they were in love, sold her condo, moved to Hawaii where he lived, married him and they are still there 10 years later.
A Vegas story with a happy ending. I didn't think any relation sparked in Vegas made it. Cool!
I have several long term clients that I've developed a real freindship with. But I always keep it seperate from work.
The last two nights, I've gone to the movies with a one of these guys. Had a great time and we both had fun. But my rule is that if, we're out as friends, and something work related comes up, work takes priority. If he would've wanted my exclusive time for the evening, he would have set up a session, and then my time would have been his. He knows this and is ok with it.
I also refuse to be in an exclusive dating relationship while I'm actively working. I'm probably going to get flamed for this, but I've always said that there's no man secure enough to be in a exclusive relationship with a provider, and not turn into a pimp or psycho. (And for the one or two guys out there that this isn't true of, you're the exception proving the rule.)
If you have can keep work and friends seperated to a degree, life is a lot simpler, and everyone knows where they stand.
Totally agree on all levels with you Tanja! THANK YOU!!!
I sense a big "TABU" on this subject (UNDERSTANDABLY). We are all just having to much fun with each other!!! Have a great weekend everyone. Hugs, Starina
Happiness can be found with the right person. If he is the right person then how you meet him should not matter. He could be a bum or even the guy who does the yard, your trainer, or a horny man when you open your door. When you find love, you will know it. It will feel so good.
I also feel that bond sometimes with certain clients and damn lately I have had some hot ones!!! Some that I wish were my boyfriends. lol
But when I started the business my best friend showed me how and she knows how loving I am and said, dont fall in live with any of the guys you see. So, I had listened to everything she said and always made it a point to never date them even though I thought the world of some of my regulars. I have been asked many time to be someones girlfriend and to let them take care of me but I could not. But I have given it a lot of thought and I dont think it is a bad thing. I mean, we are only human and our feelings should not be ignored. If we love someone then we do and that is just the way it is. Starina, I think you must be in love with someone. Shhhhhhh. I wont tell anyone. lol
Just make sure if you fall in love with a client that it is for all the right reasons such as, he makes you feel like you are on the top of the world, he rocks your box right, he protects you, he cares about your feelings, he always tells you how beautiful you are, he shares you with your girlfriends, he rocks your box, he brings you little gifts that matter. Like a flower that he picked or his cock shaped into a dildo.... Yeah! That would be a good boyfriend! And most of all, make sure that your feelings are pure mush. That you drool for him. It has to be mutual.
See when I am asked to be someones girlfriend it is usually a guy that has a ton of money and thinks he is a big shot. Hes like, baby, Ill take good care of you and you see his nice car and big house and think, wow. But then you stop and think if you are a true lady and say wait a minute, this relationship wont last cause it is only to make him look good and add to his beautiful assetts. I cannot fall in love with a man for his $$. Money is great but the other stuff has to be there first and always!
Sky
Damn I write to much!
No, I am not in love with anyone,I LOVE THEM ALL!!! I find myself, just like you, meeting alot of wonderful guys....sweet and soo yummy, they all are, in the past 3 month they have only been 2 men I did not connect with so well. Life is so good at the moment that I find myself in a constant state of happyness! I consider myself very open and spiritualy enlightened and will know when someone is supposed to share my reality on a deeper level. Other things I enjoy however, I like someone to take me on vacation too...lol!!!Right along now, LAs Vegas sounds so awesome, the Belagio playing craps, after a nice dinner and a awesome show...then later some hot desert.So where are you going on your vacation, sweety??? Smootch, Starina
Well, I may be connecting to a vacation but I am not to sure yet. Who knoes, if no one does take me then I may just sit in my bathtun filled with bubbles and pretend its cancun beach! lol lol
Lets go somewhere and you can fall in love with me! Ill treat you like a queen!
Have a good weekend sweetie,. You deserve vacation too. I love the way you are also very open and spiritual. You are such a nice girl with a great heart. And you R so full of positive energy.
Sky
Starina,
After meeting you last week, I must say you are one of the few positive, relaxed, caring and beautiful women out there. I am so glad I had the pleasure to meet you and thank you again for the invite. I know now, after meeting you, that you will find what you are looking for and it will kick your butt when you do find it. You are so passionate, loving and sincere that even if you dont find the man of your dreams....at least you can say you had a great time trying. 
It is very hard for us women to meet decent men outside the hobby and be honest and hope that they accept us....If you do meet that special someone, dont sell yourself short and settle...make sure it makes your toes curl and those butterflies in your tummy come out to play and your knees get weak at the thought of him (or her)....and make sure you really love the person! I wish you the best and know you will find true happiness when you least expect it!!!
Hugs and Kisses, Madison
Sky,
i can agree with you that you talk way to much!!
Interesting question. And as taboo as it may seem, you just keep on bonding. Ultimately, what most hobbyists want is a connection and most hobbyists are as lonely as you sound, whether they are married or not or whether they admit it or not. You providers really hold all the cards, whether you admit it or not. Bonding is at very least - human, and at most - good business.
It may seem tragic at first glance - that is, you would think that the only men that would not be judgmental of your professional decisions are the very men that professionalism dictates you NOT connect with. But that is probably not true. I would venture to guess that although a former hobbyist-boyfriend would not have a moral right to be jealous, the nature of jealousy lies in the ego of the jealous party, not in the superego of what is morally right. Maybe that is why many providers have "girlfriends" - all the emotional connection and half of the jealousy.
Unfortunately, I will not get the pleasure of meeting you in person until I am 35 . . . lol!
My second provider & myself fell for each other as soon as she opened the door on a incall. I was her last call of the evening, which allowed us to have a long talk(among other thing's)& we where a couple from there on. no more being a provider, we both wanted her off the white nose candy. To make a long story short, she stopped the nose candy & after four month's we got engaged. i broke off the engagement in a week for I found her with her nose candy once again (yes,I am very anti-drug). We did try to save our engagement, but I learned you can not change a leopard's spot's!!
p.s. Sky does not care about there money & I did not care she was a former Playboy Playmate!!
-- Modified on 10/7/2003 8:39:20 PM