Ok, so this guy is not really a lawn boy but does it on the side one day a week for all the houses on the lake...guessing he and the crew pull in like 2 or 3k just that one day, so not bad. He works a pro job in Health Care which is how we first met, and he asked if I wanted someone to cut the grass when we moved in.
He was always flirting with me every time he came around, making little comments about this and that, til finally I thought hmm..I won't fk a married man for free, but what if I did it to get my lawn done for free? That way, it's not like he is having an affair...just getting paid for services and he can treat me like the hooker I am only he does not know lol.
Anyway, was supposed to be a quickie that turned into 3 freaking hours. Long story short, I think I may have liked it a lil too much. He was stroking my damn face for pete's sake, licking me from my neck to my ass, cuddling with me...not what I am used to I guess. I feel guilty about this one. Anyone want to tell me why?
Could it be because deep inside I am longing for that type of relationship but can't because I am a hooker? Could it be because I really do feel freaking bad that I was the first he cheated on his wife with? I think my conscience is starting to get to me, and I wonder if it is because no cash exchanged hands. I certainly don't feel guilty when the envelope is on the table, so why is this so different? We traded for services just like I do with my doc, my dentist, etc.
This is not the first time I have felt guilty but it was for another reason the last few times. It was because I truly could not keep taking money from those guys knowing I could no longer provide what they needed...we just were better off as friends with no p4p. I can't be this guy's friend though. He and his family live like 3 streets over from me and I often see them out at the local bars we have in walking distance from the Marina.