Question for the ladies . Has your self esteem been raised since you started providing .
Some women in the civilian world I felt were more than beautiful , they felt they were ugly or not pretty . A couple critiques I have heard the most were features I thought added to their beauty . The self criticism I hear most often , my nose and eyes are too big .
I didn't see that in them at all .
I saw this poll today , nine out of ten women do not feel attractive .
“Only 2 percent of women are saying, ‘I’m beautiful’ and only 1 in 10 are saying, ‘I feel attractive "
“Being loved” was the greatest confidence booster of all, and half of all women said they feel more confident when they are complimented.
In civvie world, a woman is constantly bombarded with messages from every possible media source that tells her "unless you buy this product you are not good enough".
In escort world we still get the same not so subliminal messages, but we also get constant positive reinforcement from our patrons both in terms of verbal communication and little white envelops
Days when the make-up, hair, skin, tan, etc. are looking just right, I feel ok but other days not so much. It would not make a difference if every guy in or out of the hobby told me I was hot every two seconds either..it is what I feel on the inside that matters. I am "comfortable" in my own skin and that is what keeps me going. Knowing and accepting I am not perfect is very freeing I must say. So many women are so stuck on themselves and their looks it's disgusting, as they are really ugly everywhere it counts.
Posted By: dddbabe
In civvie world, a woman is constantly bombarded with messages from every possible media source that tells her "unless you buy this product you are not good enough".
In escort world we still get the same not so subliminal messages, but we also get constant positive reinforcement from our patrons both in terms of verbal communication and little white envelops
Being reviewed has totally warped my perception of how I feel about myself, real life lovers and friends thing I'm insane for the burdens I carry about my appearance and I'm generally considered attractive outside of the business.
Reviews have made me hypercritical and unsure of myself and it is difficult to endure. Extremely difficult. At the end of the day I just try to remember the pure place I was coming from in the beginning - a want of great unattached sex with a variety of partners and a degree of mutual respect / discretion & f financial treats... That helps me get over it when I have moments of insecurity or unhappiness.
Don't let this stuff impact you that way. The more comfortable you are in your own skin the more beautiful you will be, and the easier it will be to disregard things in reviews that just don't ring true to who you are.
It's opened my eyes to what I used to think most men wouldn't find attractive to be very attractive in this business.
For me: i'm going to say not really but not really isn't a no is it? About myself I've always been realistic about my looks without makeup I'm pretty, maybe not stunning but very pretty, small-bbw or not I do like my body. Getting into this you'd think no one liked a fat girl lol but outside of the hobby I have men staring down and it's not because I look funny trust me. I think I feel/am treated like more of a hottie outside of the business because i'm not actively being critiqued or judged at least not like on a review board.
I seriously used to think being bbw was automatically a point or 2 off for looks. I've never heard "she's a bbw but she's pretty" aka fine for a fat girl before in my life until this hobby lol. Disheartening at first but kind of funny because I turn off the laptop and go out into the world and get enough people on a daily basis calling me beautiful, complimenting my skin & features, in general just how nice I look. Outside of the hobby my support system is very strong and is a huge source my usual high (not deluded) self-esteem.
In the end do I feel attractive? Usually yes I do and I guess generally feeling loved and getting complimented often helps very much.
providers have to feel they are attractive..they have to have high self esteem..how can they do what they do without it? some negative reviews by a few erode that self esteem a little but never destroy it..once you learn in this business to take everything with a grain of salt..you will be fine..you will be confident of yourself..be attractive..and not worry about what others think of you..just be yourself and be proud of it..
Beauty, especially features, in this Country equals status. In a nutshell, although fleeting, beauty equals power for women. Once you understand this you will understand why you find women critiquing themselves.
While my physical beauty is far MORE revered outside of the US, I feel very beautiful.
I do not fully understand how physical beauty translates into "providing" only because I do not see "mainstream" physical beauty being necessary for success in this business.
I fully agree. After all the lady I love the most is not the most attractive I have ever seen (but she is a knockout and easily a ten by many men on here standards). My favorite providers is not the most attractive I have booked. The best feature on a good woman is not on the outside but in who she is.
Now that being said if she wants to make my porn collection she better be hot as all get out on the outside.
Despite all this talk of men thinking they are God's gift to women, I think they most have never truly felt attractive. This bragging about their awesomeness is a way to cover up the fact that they really aren't sure about themselves. I've spoken to many gents on the topic and most will admit they don't really feel they're good looking. Sadly in relationships there is a lot of focus on making the woman feel beautiful and special, even with providers. Rarely do women realize they too need to make men feel attractive too.
Media does a lot to make women feel inferior. In part, ladies need to realize that actors and models don't look that good everyday. Amazing things can be done with lighting, professional makeup and Photoshop.
Women feel desirable when people desire them. When you're in a long term relationship, it's easy for self perception to lower. Since the lady isn't available, she's going out on the town the way single people do, or she's wearing a ring, or is with her partner most of the time. That means men are hitting on her very much. If her partner has grown comfortable and taken her for granted, she may not be getting that much needed self esteem boost from him either.
The compliments I receive as a provider are lovely, but I have to admit I'm weary of them. Not to say they are lying, but they can be flippant. Only the moments that truly seem sincere really register. However, the sensual nature of this career does a lot to ensure that a provide is aware she is attractive without words. If there wasn't something attractive about body and mind than one would not achieve much success as a provider.
To be honest, it is compliments from other women that do the most to boost my esteem. If I'm walking down the street and a lady approaches me to compliment how I look, I know I must look good. Women don't go out of their way to do something like that unless they see something they think is outstanding.
I got a review today and the guy said i was not as attracted as he thought and it hurt my feelings a little bit because i did not feel i am anywhere near that to be even mentioned as far as appearance..
But its okay with me..Coming from the guy who wrote it.. only if you guys knew
I don't know if I can speak for a majority, but I see many gals not just for their beauty, or even because of their skills, but because I like them as individuals owing to their erudition or just plain lovableness, or most like a combination of both.
If they are a bit wacky, so much the better too.
I'm sure I'm not turning gals on like some kind of George Cluney type, but I do feel attractive to them on account of what I bring to the relationship in terms of congeniality, for want of a better term.
(And yes, I know, the envelope helps too; no need to point that out you cynical types.)
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