I have been providing for about 7 or so months and wanted to ask Newbies a question. When you request to see a provider and you do not have any provider references why is there so much difficulty with obtaining the information needed to screen you?
I usually ask for:
Full Name (First, Last, Middle I)
D.O.B
Work Name/Address/Main Switchboard number
* If an out call the address you want me to come to
It is like pulling teeth out to get this information. Not only is it about LE, but it is about other safety precautions. Hey I am 5'6, 125, and have been classified as a spinner. This means if you are a crazy or serial killer I will have a hard time defending myself. So I have to screen out the loonies.
If you are seeing providers and they do not screen be careful. If a provider does not screen, she may not always use protection. She may not safeguard your information or identity (email addy or telephone numb) If she is not concerned with her safety, how can you expect her to be concerned with yours??
Just wanted to put this out there for all newbies to see and comment on.
Guys:
No one can blame you for feeling leary about giving up personal information, but look at it from the providers point of view.
You can already find out lots of stuff about her from her reviews and her website. Isn't it only fair that she learn something about you, especially if you don't have any references?
Her point about how it is much less safe for you if you see a provider who does not screen should be some food for thought.
I'm a newbie and I think that what you're asking for is fair. I have seen a few providers, and it always makes me feel better when I find out that they have screened me, rather than simply asking for the info.
Do you think it would be easier for you to screen if you used p411, datecheck ...?
How about this. IF you wanted to burn me somehow, what information would you need to make that happen? The same info you are asking for to screen me!
I'm sure that long term hobbyists have resources or friends and are more used to it than us newbies. But for us this part is the scary part. I would rather you have a friend in the next room with a gun 
It would be cool if there were a way to verify you and me without having to give away the whole deal before we even meet. There should be a social event or something where there is no business or arrangements made (so LE has nothing) but you can see that I am totally harmless without needing the keys to my life.
BTW some of us own our own businesses and so we are the switchboard. CEO? Speaking. Accounting? Speaking. Toilet Cleaning? Speaking.
I agree with this point, plus some of us are self-employed and work out of our homes. As far as providing references, all the provider has to do is ask. I'll give her what I can, and if that isn't satisfactory for screening, then I'll move on and let her do the same. But that's just me.
jhb
i.e., read the reviews and even go farther than that to look into the history of those who have reviewed the ladies that you are interested in meeting - there is very little chance that you will be burned, much less meet someone who has any interest in "burning" you. Of course, never say never. It has happened, a couple of times that I've heard of. (Of course, out of the thousands and thousands of experiences I have heard of.)
A well reviewed provider with a reputation for discretion and safety is not likely to suddenly go crazy and do something to hurt you, thereby ruining her reputation and her future income (not to mention possible felony charges, if you are worrying about blackmail and the like)...
vs.
the worry a woman who has a friend in the next room with a gun.
I can tell you that the second scenerio is MUCH more dangerous and more common, and should be a serious concern to you. Perhaps you are too paranoid for this hobby? Maybe not near paranoid enough?
If we don't have mutual friends who can say that you a nice man, I don't think asking you to prove WHO you are is "giving(ing) away the whole deal" or asking for "the keys to (your) life." It is basic common sense. You want to spend time alone with a lady in an intimate and vulnerable setting. *cough* You want to fuck her. Are you really forgetting what you are asking? What if your daughter or sister or mom told you they met someone named "triplehumpcamel" online who invited them over to his hotel room for some fun. Would you fear for them? Insist on more info?
If screening worries you so much, see ladies who don't screen or go with alternate verification services. There are alternatives and you have CHOICE. However, it will change which ladies are available for you to meet, that's just how it is.
Please tell me - how would meeting you at a social event prove that you are not LE? How will it prove to me that you are not a violent known sex offender? YOU control your risk through your choices, that is your right. it is not your right to think you have a say in how any lady controls hers.
As to owning your own business, there are ways that can be verified just fine.
.02 or .03
-- Modified on 7/18/2008 2:49:41 PM
Safety is #1 for us ladies. I am risking not only LE, but my physical safety. Do you know how many stories there are of ladies who have gotten beat up by hobbyists? In Ohio we had a man calling up escorts and raping them. After he raped them he killed most of them. LE is arresting gals left and right. Do you know what the common demonination of most of these cases are?? They did not screen. 300/hr is not worth me losing my life over.
Like the provider above stated you can check out my reviews. In essence everyone who meets me has about 10 references just on this site, that have stated I am legit. Can I at least verify that you are.?
If you have references this discuss was not directed at you. This was to educate the newbies on why we ask for alternative screening methods if they have not seen a provider before.
-- Modified on 7/18/2008 3:47:15 PM
-- Modified on 7/18/2008 3:48:12 PM
A couple of months ago, there was a post on the Legal board asking if it was okay to assault a masseuse!!!!! If someone like that has thought about it enough to ask on a discussion board, what are the chances of him actually assaulting someone?
jhb
There are risks in everything, but you are really paranoid. Maybe you should stick with humping camels! LOL
ROTFLMAO So one explain to me how meeting in public proves you are not a psycho path. Jefferory Dalmer was described as a nice quiet guy. I mean sheesh, people used to let their kids go to his house to play. If I know your true identity it lessens the likely hood you will try anything crazy. People are more willing to act an ass when they think they are anoynomous. Just look at this boards. I have met some of the loud mouth shit starting members. When I see them, their demeanor is totally different from their oneline persona.
For all of you paranoids P411 and datecheck. That way if you try something. At least someone knows who you are if I have to call LE and report an assault or something.
I have to agree with the camel. I have no problems talking about myself or meeting in a public place first but things like my last name is a no no.
Does not giving out personal info up front make you feel invincible? What do you guys do when you meet at her incall? Do you take a cab, rent a car, or do you drive your own car, or worse, the company car? Running your tags through the DMV takes about 30 seconds. That information, coupled with a pic taken through the peep hole in the door of the notel and then you're well on your way to having your identity stolen, or outed at home or work. It's all about calculated risks. Stick with well reviewed providers who screen and forget about you when you leave, or find some random girl who doesn't screen and roll the dice. Not screening by a provider is risky behavior. What other risky behaviors does she engage in? Good luck to you.
its a benefit or a drawback of this business, all depending on how you view it. But either way to see most well reviewed Ladies, you will need to go through their screening process. There are plenty of Gentlemen who have and are willing to so the Ladies will pass on you if you can not or will not comply. Its just the way it is. Safety first and always.
Your attitudes are unreasonable and one sided.
We are all taking risks, she that I'm a psycho and me that her "friend" is in the next room with a gun/knife/etc, or that she is going to rob or blackmail me.
The moment that she gives me the data necessary to destroy her life she can have mine. I'm sure that all of you are really named Amber, Candy and Tiffany and those phone numbers are registered in your name.
I'd prefer not to become the next Eliott Spitzer.
This should be anonymous as possible on all parts. Show me your's and I'll show you mine.
this I am guessing, is why Doc that you have no reviews. No lady who screens will see you since you want it all to be as anonymous as possible.
use a service like p411 its safe and less info goes out to the ladies.
"Your attitudes are unreasonable and one sided."
No, since the attitudes of ladies who screen have to do with US, managing our work and our lives... they may be one sided, yet they are very reasonable.
You on the other hand make decisions that are at odds with ladies that screen based on your fears of meeting a psycho who wants to destroy your life. That is reasonable, to and for YOU.
Each to their own. It's the beauty of all of this - there is a match for everyone somewhere, based on financial resources, desire and mutual comfort level.
The biggest fear mongers I've met were the Safeway stock boys, not the political figures, clergy or CEO's. It was Spitzer whose sketchy financial wire transfers brought on the investigation and the heat of the feds, negative impacting the ladies, NOT the other way around.
"BTW some of us own our own businesses and so we are the switchboard. CEO? Speaking. Accounting? Speaking. Toilet Cleaning? Speaking." Thanks triple.
Just a quick question on the subject here.... and let me go on the record, I am on the fence with HOME info, but work info seems relatively ok. I know it can lead to the same place, but at least if you call to verify my work info you can play like a prospective vendor or some other work related situation... calling my house would be much more tricky.
That having been said, what assurances can you get from calling my work? I'd guess that most psycho's employers don't know they are that way. I'm sure it comes in handy AFTER you've been attacked or (God forbid) killed, but how can it protect you before hand? And if it is for after such an event, that would mean that this info is written down somewhere after you have verified...which most providers say they do NOT do. If it is written down, and the appointment right before or after mine is LE (I'm sure plenty have passed screening), what's to say that they don't also now have my info?
I don't fault providers for wanting to keep themselves safe, but you can't say it is just us being paranoid (as some have in this thread). There is a lot of risk (although maybe not to life and limb) for the hobbyist as well.
SMEGMA!!
" If it is written down, and the appointment right before or after mine is LE (I'm sure plenty have passed screening), what's to say that they don't also now have my info?"
What are the odds that a lady who actually screens will run into problems immediately after your appointment? If she is screening, it's not very likely at all. I'm not calling you paranoid, you certainly do need to think these things through and make decisions for your own self based on your comfort level. That said, there is reasonable-fear and then there is simply fear.
There is so much brew-ha over the "little black books" from some agency busts which have hit the news, yet there is usually very little if any follow up or negative consequence to those who were in the book. It is not illegal for someone to have your contact information, no matter what their profession.
This identity info is usually used to check sex offender registries and to help ensure that you are not LE. It is actually very useful to us ladies when requested.
If you re-read my post, I didn't so much have a problem with giving my info, more with the fact that for it to be really usefull, it would have to be kept after verification. Most ladies and Agencys say that once the info is checked out, all records are destoyed. While I have no way of knowing what is destroyed and what is not, it seems to me that my employment info is only useful to verify I will be able to be found AFTER I do something wrong at the appointment....so the info would have to be kept until then at least. I wasn't trying to say that a provider would get pinched right after an date with my info in her purse...I agree the odds would be slim on that. It was more about the chances of a 'little black book' scenario. I'm not so worried that I would be Elliot Spritzer(sp?) and targeted, more that if my info was found, calls would be made in a routine fashion and my life would be turned upside down simply because my info was written down when it should have been destroyed.
For the record, I don't blame the providers for wanting to protect themselves, and screening is the most likely way to do that, I was just responding to the fact that a lot of providers and hobbyists feel that newbies not wanting to give their info is crazy. There is a real risk in giving out your info and what is done with it after, although it is not to life and limb.
SMEGMA!!
My logic (though it may be flawed) is ...LE generally targets providers who do not screen. So do you loonies. Why risk meeting with a lady who now know your work information and hurt her when you can see tons of ladies who will not screen you so the chances of you getting caught or lessened.
If I am a hobbyist and I want to hurt you or rip you off, it is a lot easier if you have less information about me not more.
Now this isn't 100% looney proof, but it helps. Would you rob a bank if you had to give the teller you name and work information 1st?
-- Modified on 7/21/2008 1:00:11 PM
What happens if you're notfrom the country? US and Canada for instance? How do you confirm your sanity then?