Would probably be very acceptable to many providers. Contact one who interests you, explain your situation, and I think you'll find that, if you give her the information that she needs, you will be on your way to your first date. Just my thoughts, but I'm sure the ladies can answer a little more definitively.
While we are on a run of questions about screening, let me add another one.
I'm a newbie as well, and have never seen a provider. Due to the nature of my employment, I'd rather not leave a paper trail, should I decide to become active. So, I'm leery of the commercial verification companies like Date-Check. Nor do I really want to go the route of agencies. The cynical side of me wonders if either of them really destroy all documentation immediately, or if using them just adds a potential problem sometime down the road.
In my work, I have been extensively screened, for way more than Date-Check could possibly ask. I also have record that this screening was done.
If I were willing to trust a selected provider or two, show my full employment information, along with other documentation they might want, would that be a reasonable substitue for a verification service in the beginning? I'd want to do this in person, and I figured they'd want that as well, to meet me and let their internal "radar" come to the conclusion that I'm not LE or a whacko. It could be in a public place, over a meal or something. Of course, I understand the value of the time involved, and would certainly be willing to cover that, as if it were a session if need be. Any actual session arrangements would be scheduled later and completely separately.
Does my thought process here make sense? I certainly understand the need for screening, and wouldn't want to see anyone who didn't screen. But, as mentioned in so many threads, it is a chicken-and-egg scenario. But in my case, some of the more usual routes of overcoming that might be unavailable.
Thoughts or suggestions are welcomed.
Thanks!
Would probably be very acceptable to many providers. Contact one who interests you, explain your situation, and I think you'll find that, if you give her the information that she needs, you will be on your way to your first date. Just my thoughts, but I'm sure the ladies can answer a little more definitively.
Tough spot. I "know a guy" who has same issue. Found two a two different providers who after chatting a bit were willing to meet me for coffee first nearby. It was of course on the clock. I would find the provider you are interested in and pursue it honestly and matter of factly. Whats the worst that will happen? They will say no. Actually, one of the gals he met for coffee near a place she was getting her nails done. Grabbed some joe and then he suggested we go shopping as it was near Christmas. She loved it and in the end he never paid for that time. Some providers will operate outside of the conventions. Some are fine with some emails ahead of time and then show ID when get there. Others never ask for the ID. Good luck
Most established providers will accept employment information in lieu of DateCheck, Preferred 411, etc. I don't think these agencies do much more screening than verifying employment anyway. The benefit of being a member is the collection of provider references you accumlate as you go along.
Your next question is a little tricky. As samumina mentioned, any meeting to get acquainted will almost undoubtedly be on the clock. Plus, a smart provider is going to want to screen you before meeting at all, have you any idea how many requests they get to meet for drinks, lunch, or dinner just to chat? LOL
I would not put much thought into the idea that the providers would want to meet you first and trust their 'internal radar'. That has been the downfall of many a provider and the reason for screening in the first place. In fact many providers will immediately turn a deaf ear as soon as you mention meeting them first to discuss screening. My suggestion would be that once you find someone you would like to see, she will probably have a website with a contact page form. Just fill out the form as best you can and go from there.
I agree contact the lady in her prefered maner, explain your situation honestly. You can offer to meet her in a neutral location at your expense though don't be surprised if she doesn't take you up on it. Still it shows transparency on your part.
If requested you should show her your ID. Much better than making a record of it.
The biggest issue with not leaving tracks is probably electronic. One should not use work computers or their network to access anything you don't want public. Then you should use a scrubber overwrite program on your home computer.
Of course, do not use your regular cell.
skb
See if there are some ladies that have a "no references OK" or if they have alternative screening methods.
The first time is always the most difficult (in more ways than one), you may have to try several times before you find one.
Baby steps R70...you need to earn your reward first, right my friend?
Take care.
When/if the time comes for specifics, I will indeed post on the regional board. I was just curious about procedure for this given circumstance.
You are correct on the earning. It isn't time yet, and I've been working on things in the other direction as well.
Thanks again.
I would find a provider you are interested in and see if she would accept the employment verification you have. Personally, I don't use datecheck or verification services. I prefer to verify employment and provider references on my own. This way I am sure of the reliablity of the person.
I also like to talk to the person on the phone ahead of time to establish a rapport.
Good luck in your search.
Kari~~