Over the years I have become rather close with three providers, not Kgirls.  Usually their personalities are nothing like what you see initially.  I just had one end recently that lasted about three years.  Two of those years she was still a provider, about the last year she had quite the business.  Really the only reason it lasted that long was because she lives in another state.  So we would only see each other when I was visiting her state, she was visiting my state for her "real job", or we would meet somewhere and take a trip together.  It didn't take very long for me to realize there was no way I could be around her a lot.  

In general, personality disorders such a Borderline Personality Disorder only affect about 6% percentage of the population.  I suspect this is likely more at least 30% in the provider population.  Though only one provider has ever admitted to me having it because she was in treatment for it.  

I don't know of this particular lady has BPD or not.  Some things fit while others don't.  But she clearly has some type of personality disorder.  When I first visited her and stayed at her place I was shocked at what a complete slob she was.  I'm not a neat freak, but I'm not a slob either.  I also soon realized she was a heavy smoker even though you couldn't tell if meeting her for a session.  She was also a very heavy drinker.  At this point I was still fine with us visiting on occasion and taking an occasional trip.  

She would talk about how bad her family treats her, about what a pain her roommates were, and about what disasters her past relationships were.  I still didn't see the true issue for about a year and a half until we got too close.  Then I realized, it wasn't her family, roommates, or old boyfriends that were the problem, it was her.   I ran an errand for her once when she was at work, then realized I got the wrong size and needed to go back and exchange it.  She started cussing me out form making the mistake and threatened to cancel our plans for that evening.  She apologized later so I let it go.  On another occasion she contacted me to get advice on something I hold a professional license in.  When she didn't hear the answer she wanted, she started cussing me out.  She apologized later so I let it go.   On another occasion I sent her two items she said she wanted/needed.  One I picked up for her when out of the country and the other she said she was out of, so I ordered more for her then sent both on to her when I had them.  There was a third item she wanted that needed to be kept cool and it was a hot time of the year.  So I researched which was best and told her which one she should get locally.  After she got the package, instead of a thank you, she cussed me out for not getting her the third item.  Then said she lied to me about actually being out of the second item I had ordered for her.  That is three examples, there are more.  She was a crazy bitch and I'm surprised I put up with it as long as I did.  But she usually always apologized later, I wasn't around her much, and when she wasn't being crazy she was fine to be around.  

Another lady I got to know very well turned out to have a severe drug problem.  So I distanced myself from her real fast when I realized the issue.

A third lady I got very close to in the 1990s did have a bad alcohol problem.  But she was able to recover from it and stay sober.  With her, she actually seemed quite normal.  I never saw any mood problems or anything.  I even met her father once.  Plus I was only 4 or 5 years older than her.  If our lives were better lined up I actually would have possibly been interested in trying a LTR wth that one.  

So yes, to sum it up.  Usually the lady you think you know will be nothing like who she really is.  As said previously, it is a total fantasy version you know initially.  So if you do decide to get closer be very careful, establish boundaries, and keep the exit sign in clear view.  It could take awhile to see the real her.