There's the obvious ones (and they apply equally to providers and customers)
- Screen as thoroughly as possible (not foolproof - but foolish to ignore - and "screening" by asking "are you a cop" is just silly, Cops don't have to tell you, and, if they're setting up a bust, they're undoubtedly going to deny it)
- Make sure that every ad has the legal disclaimers ("you're only paying for my time - not sex" etc. And, IMHO, its just downright reckless to advertise "services" you are willing to provide)
- Never discuss money or services before the date (the provider has to trust that the customer has read her website or ads for the rates [it's perfectly acceptable to ask "have you read my website"] and the customer has to trust that the provider is legit)
- Never discuss money or services on the date before the "act" (I always cringe when a provider asks me what I want on a first date. It doesn't matter whether she asks before or after I place the envelope on the dresser. Providers need to develop a good humored way to deflect the conversation when a clueless customer brings it up.
- Never upsell additional services for additional fees
- Ideally, the customer will place the money discretely - and not mention it or even gesture toward it (I learned that from my ATF) - its very difficult to prosecute for solicitation when the provider has never asked for money and the customer has never offered money
- Spend some time (unpaid if necessary) getting to know one another before jumping into bed (the half hour "wham bam" date is going to really get you screwed if your partner turns out to be a cop)
Yes, anyone who follows this protocol (providers and customers) is going to get burned some times. But most of us would agree that its better to get burned once by someone dishonest than it is to get busted. If someone runs a scam, lies, or cheats, this is a wonderful forum to let all of us know. And yes, both providers and customers have to devote extra time to develop new relationships - but that's no different than any other business that I'm aware of.
Even with all of this, most dates, incall or outcall, where a couple meet and get right down to business, can be successfully prosecuted if the authorities take a mind to do so. It's not too difficult to convince a jury that sex is, in fact, the only object of the transaction. For that reason, I only see new providers who are willing to meet me for dinner first. I usually pay her, for her time, at dinner - and trust that if things go well, we'll have fun later. I confess that I've been burned a couple of times - but really, its very rare. We can usually get a pretty good feel for one another over dinner - and no cop is going to meet me at a restaurant, sit through a meal at which sex is not discussed, and then try to arrest me for asking her for a nightcap. Similarly, no provider is going to get arrested for getting turned on during a date and wanting to fuck later (at least if no additional money is offered or requested). For me, the risk of occaisionally getting scammed is worth it for the peace of mind from knowing that my dates will never be prosecuted as an illegal act.