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New to site and hobby with odd questionred_smile
meettheman 2396 reads
posted

I'm older and just very recently started hobbying. Usual situation i.e. sexless marriage.  Decided after some research before finding here to try a couple of independents and tried 4 with 2 I decided no to revisit. The other 2 I've revisited for different reasons.  Here is the issue:

I have a physical issue with feel in the manhood. Childhood injury. Hard to get up thorugh once it does it is okay but, then due to reduced feeling I can go for hours without climaxing and using a condom leaves m with no feeling.  As a result of this over the years my fingers and tongue have seen quite a bit of use and training.

I've explained this to the 1 I'm writng about.  She is new to both the profession and sex other than cbj and safe fs and originally her bf who was not imaginative. The time between her forst experience and going into the profession is only about a year.  After a couple of meetings, she let me touch her vagina and initially while scared enjoyed it. We have progressed to her now loving my fingers and tongue and even a little move on her anus.  I only have to careful as when she climaxes, she brings her legs together and nearly strangles me. She just for the first time did a bbbj for a minute but is still nervous. I am not pushing for it nor unsafe sex. She also has told me she'd be willing to try cim with me.

Rather than her original clock watching, she now turns the clock so it can not be seen unless she gets up. Also, where she was stiff and standoffish she now folds nicely into me and loves to hug and cuddle and now is kissing.

She has standard hours at a callin but asked me after a couple of times to come up to 2 hours before opening so we are not rushed and she is fresh and not tired.  This works foine for me as I visit on my way to work in the morning and I am freshly shaved, showered and dressed.  

She has a female friend I've met by chance and the friend told me the girl talks to her about others but when she talks about me coming over she is now referring to me as her boyfriend and does not tell her about anything we are doing or she is learning but has shown her a toy (cuffs that she is crazy about) and an outfit. She told the gf she would only use either with me, especially the cuffs. The gf who convinced her to try the trade mentioned that the iho the girl had crossed the lined and become involved with a client and it was not good. I at first figured it was a joke but not any longer. She also was upset to find I had her personal nonbusiness number and we called each other by our real names and I do not use her professional name. Also, she has not been as willing to go partying out with the girls, rather going home since we met.

Here is the issue.  I love the fact that she is no longer worried about the clock but, she has been refusing my donations saying she is enjoying our time and loves being with me. I have gotten to the point where I try to set a  time length but like today I set it for 1/2 hour and after 45 minutes, when I tried to break it off she jumped on my face. Yeah, I know that I have no will power when facing certain body parts. I finally got out after 2 1/2 hours. She finally agreed to accept a fess for 1/2 hour.  During the time together she canceled an appointment but had not shown and turned 1 away who showed up at the door without a appt though I told her, I'd dress and leave. She is closed Monday but asked me to come to the callin and be with her for the entire morning (4 hours) but not insult her by offering money.

At first I thought it was a comeon and tried to figure out where the payoff was but can not figure the angle. Can not seem to be money as I've estimated if I paid for all the time I've been with her, she'd be more than 2x more ahead than what I've donated since the beginning.  

With her newness to sex, the profession, deviation from her business practices, refusal to take money and everything else, I am curious whether I should be nervous or just go with the flow and enjoy life? She's never telephoned me except in response to a call from me.

If I had experience with pros, I'd probably feel more comfortable but I'm worried she actually may be vulnerable if this is somehow not all an act (my professional training says it is but the human in me says it is not). I am not going to leave me wife and yes she knows I'm married. This seemed to bother her for a few visits. We do really get along well and enjoy our time together in and out of bed. I know we use the hobby not to have entanglements but this is not all smoke, does this happen and any advice would be appreciated.

Sorry for the long 1st post. Both male and female views on this are appreicated.


I think the Love Goddess can give you better advice than you will receive here.  But next time be sure you use a spell-checker!

-- Modified on 12/24/2007 12:33:53 PM

As long as you are being honest with her I guess it's up to you how far you want to let this go. My hunch would be that she is at a stage now where she is infatuated and your being a married man is not an issue for her.  That will change eventually and she may want more of your time and emotion than you are willing to give. Frankly I don't see it ending well but every situation is different. I would be very careful about how much of your personal information you share with this lady. Ugly things may develop down the road and the less she knows about your real world life the better.

But I do know that these types of associations can turn out poorly as the line between client and provider turns into boyfriend/girl friend.

This could be a very worthwhile and enjoyable relationship, but I think the main question I would ask you is one that my broker is always asking me, that is:  "What is your risk tolerance?"  Only you can answer that one.

I would like to amplify the advice of both Boston Guy and Jazz and suggest that you turn to The Love Goddess on the Erotic Highway board for some sound advice.

meettheman784 reads

Thank you all who responded. I realized it was I who was uncomfortable with this situation and am old enough to know what to do about it.  On Christmas Eve I took a nice gift to her and we sat and talked - nothing more.  She had previously told me a little about herself and this time we went a little deeper about her.  She is a trained professional in her home country but, in another profession.  When she came here because of the business cycle of the profession she could not find work and finally her friend convinced her to start as a provider.  She tried it at first and got turned on as she was new in more ways than one but felt ashamed. The more she did it the less she saw a way out.

I know understood the mixed readings I got from her.  She also has a clientele who is not sensitive to her, i.e. somewhat rough and when I came along she found just the opposite and did not want to lose that as it was her one connection with the human side of the physical act and she felt it slowed her loss of self-esteem.

As I know several companies in her profession and in her ethnic community, I asked her to send me her resume and I would make some calls.  This she did yesterday and I made a couple of calls this morning.  The second one I called knew her resume as she had interviewed last year but he had no openings. He tried to find her for this year but she had moved and address, e-mail, phone, etc. were out of date.  Bottom line is they have a meeting tomorrow but he has already decided to employ her based on their earlier interview.  Tis I did not tell her so if something happens and she blows it, it will not hurt as much.

She has closed for the day is going shopping for a new business suit and asked me to come by late to see if it looked okay.

When we talked she told me if she gets the employment she will be closing shop but would like to continue seeing me.  I left it that we would talk about it after but regardless of the outcome, we would remain close in some way.

I feel good.  Maybe there was a reason for me to start when I did and to meet her.  Maybe a Santa comes in many styles and ways.

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