Whilst I do realize that not all providers verify clients, please realize that a lot of us do and sometimes this takes time. Its not a matter of do we like the name you sent us. TER is not a screening site and giving us your TER handle doesn't help, but we do take into consideration if you have reviewed providers or if your whitelisted. P411 is a screening and verification site but even with that said, it doesn't negate that many won't see joeblow1234 just because he is a member. Lets say we meet and 2 hours into our date you beat the hell out me, rob me or rape me. We were seen at a local restaurant, or even in the lobby of the hotel. What name do I give the cops? Joeblow1234? What city or state is joeblow1234 from? Get the picture?
Now for those of you who may argue that you don't know our real names or information..Understand this, if your looking for a companion and she has an active website or phone number, guess what? If she somehow manages to set you up, or rob you...as much as you may not like people in your business, your able to give her website, or phone number (all of which, with a court order can be tracked and traced). Some of us stand behind safety first. Safety for ourselves and safety for our clients. The adult industry can be a major win for those who want to have safe, fun and uninhibited experiences with like minded individuals. Or it can be a dark, dangerous dreadful place to play. #staysafe
for what I notice, many ladies whitelist guys just in exchange of a review.
And that's why I don't use whitelist on behalf of screening.
As a matter of fact, I have a gentleman RIGTH now upset because when he asked for a whitelist I told him that from my perspective " I whitelist regular clients and those that I known them well and I've seeing for a certain period of time"
One meeting doesn't necessary tell me that, if he wants immediately "ok.s" he should sign up for p411.
But as far as whitelist on TER that's a bit different. (at least form my perspective, but each lady has their rigth to manage their business how they wish).
Also, a whitelist is something that I should decided if I give or not...and not BEING TOLD TO DO SO~
that's not how I work, I am or how I would let others treat me.
(sorry I posted under yours, but I was going to post this too as well) 
V~
Lol, no problem Gorgeous,
But your absolutely right on the whitelist. Not saying there is a right or wrong way to how anyone verifies (just hope that everyone) realizes that there are those who stand behind verifying clients whom they are considering to spend time with. And the only way to do that is to screen. I've had several girls email wanting references on gentlemen and they only have an email, no reviews, no P411 OK's, no website. I'm not wasting my time to find out why, but on the flip side of this, I won't even reference a client if I can't verify the provider. That is for the safety of my clients I have seen. The verification process goes both ways.
CORRECT!!
Im wondering what's the gentleman's view on the whitelist?
Do they want a whitelist (a long list of whitelist) to prevent more screening in the future? do they need to be reminded on how much we like them? do they feel like its a good "review"?, bust their ego? or they expect that other ladies in the future see the "whitelist" and don't screen them?
Either way, I am not going to tolerate ANYONE threaten me because I didn't want to whitelist him... and even now more after his tantrum, I definitely would not do it. His actions just prove that I always need to trust my gut.
V~
-- Modified on 3/3/2017 11:38:29 AM
I think most guys think WhiteList will help circumvent screening in the future with other providers.
I accept WhiteLists and P411 okays, but that is because I randomly pick a provider who gave them to the client to inquire about him.
WhiteLists/Okays should NOT be given in exchange for a review. That is effectively bartering, and manipulative. I give them at my discretion to clients who I feel genuinely are safe to see, whether I've seen them once or multiple times.
To be honest I don't remember ever asking for a white list? I rarely ever check to see who has even given them to me and when I notice I will thank her for doing so even though it may be some time after it has been given.
If the providers use them for screening along with p411 okays it's fine with me. If there is a provider I really want to see whatever she is requesting for her safety I would do within reason.
I've never inquired about it, maybe I should have if it would make things a bit easier to ensure I am able to meet the woman I'm trying to schedule, maybe not. I find it difficult to comprehend that there are men out there that would harm a lady but I know they are out there. So, it really boils down to the provider and her methods to ensure she is comfortable and safe with the guy on the other end of the keyboard/phone. Can't blame them for being overprotective....which I've screwed up previously and understand that complete discretion is mutual and beneficial for both.
I provide honest reviews on TER and hope that 411 works in my benefit so you can contact the provider for additional details, that's what it's for, right? I provide reviews so others can make an educated, financial decision, to see if they might want to spend some time with said provider.
Until then - stay safe!
because everyone can see it. I'd rather just have a P411 OK that doesn't get broadcasted to the entire community.
Probably a good tactic. Haven't inquired about it but haven't had issues getting cleared....well, once it was more difficult and thorough which made me think something was up. Just turns out that she was more concerned Jan others, probably good on her part but I wasn't very receptive ---- my fault!
....can we just get legalization already?
Yes, I agree totally. But even if it were legalized the verification and screening would still be necessary. Cigarettes and Alcohol are Legal, but you still have to verify your of legal age.
if it were legal then we would be having a different discussion
Now for those of you who may argue that you don't know our real names or information..Understand this, if your looking for a companion and she has an active website or phone number, guess what? If she somehow manages to set you up, or rob you...as much as you may not like people in your business, your able to give her website, or phone number (all of which, with a court order can be tracked and traced). Some of us stand behind safety first. Safety for ourselves and safety for our clients. The adult industry can be a major win for those who want to have safe, fun and uninhibited experiences with like minded individuals. Or it can be a dark, dangerous dreadful place to play. #staysafe
Not all of us are publicly out there (show our face), have come out to friends or family, or do this full time. All of us have so much to lose and it's only fair to keep everyone safe. Many people cling to the one story they heard where it went badly. My theory on screening is this: clients screen us by viewing our websites, reviews, twitter accounts or blogs. The least that can be done is extending the courtesy of allowing us to get to know you to feel safe. Plus, with RS2K going down, then the issue with Date-Check which was taken over by Chloe's Companions being brought down, and the rumors about information being sold off from other verification & ad sites, I think it's only reasonable that folks provide us the information we need.
Personally, I only ask for what I determine to be the bare necessities to ensure a person is not Buffalo Bill (that's a Silence of the Lambs reference because I have really soft skin haha). For screening the person may either have two companion references within the last six (6) to eight (8) months, go through employment verification, or I'll accept three P411 "okay's" but I will still reach out to those women individually. I'll also ask the potential client for some follow-up details if needed.
Integrity is a major value of our industry. It is disheartening that the actions of a few sometimes impact a person to where it's difficult to receive the information we need to feel safe.
There are a lot who get excited when a lady slips with her real name. I've had a few drop "real" names of other girls as though that's what they call her all the time. I have had to have "the talk" with a few over the years when that happened-not to casually drop real names, and if they can't help it, they should work to not know them. Sometimes I feel like they do it on purpose. I know I've had friends tell me "psst this guy was talking about you under your real name, and I didn't even know he was talking about you!"
I think some do it for bragging rights.
Some people forget the stigma behind our occupation. It's not as easy to be "heard" as a sex worker.
As you mentioned, many of us aren't out. I am out to family/friends, but I still feel like there are certain people who should not know, because it's inappropriate and not good for them to know/hear about it. So out of respect for them, their morals, age, etc. I don't tell them, nor talk about it around them.
And as I said, many many clients feel super proud that they know an escort's real name. I can see why. Unfortunately, many can get loose with that information and accidentally slip that info to someone who really is out to "out" us - such as female competitors.
One of my really good girlfriends told me about a dude who told her my name in casual conversation. "Oh, you know Xxxxxxx?" She was like, "Who's that?" As he explained, he talked to her like it was nothing. She explained who it was, and I have zero clue who it was, but he was actually a DC client I had seen 3+ years ago.
The "real" names slip out casually even years later, apparently.
-- Modified on 3/5/2017 8:55:44 AM
yes this does happen. the man tries to display his power by telling a secret. it's very sad