You've just discovered the magic key that opens a vault chock-a-block full of the objects of your life long natural desire.
Add to this realization that what you've discovered and are doing often feeds a latent rebellious nature as well as your ego, and you have found one of the most powerfully addictive activities to be had.
It would be wise to set spending limits; weekly, monthly, per session, etc. For many an otherwise prudent man has looked back after his first year in the hobby and found he happily let tens of thousands of dollars pass from his hand in his eagerness to use and re-use the key.
Participating in these discussion boards will avail tons of information while affording a comradely with others, and sometimes a placebo of sorts when you wish you were hobbying; but the time or resources are not right.
In the fullness of time, save for possible, latent, psychological or emotional deficiencies you'll find a comfortable balance between your wants, your needs, and your resources.
I am newbie and had my very first GFE last week with an outstanding lady! Anyway - I really need to focus and remind myself - even though I am older - I have work to do! So how do you overcome the obsession? I find myself reading - posting and searching TER all the time! I love it- because it is like a dark side that others don't know about - but I have to say to myself "FOCUS" - but this is a whole new world!So to others would might be reading this - what did you do when you first started here?
and had already been hobbying for upwards of twenty years.
I lurked, reading but not even signing up until Bev Fisher convinced me to do so a couple of years ago.
I devoured everything I could in the links that people provided (The Instruction Manual is a relatively new item here.) and learned how much I didn't know about the hobby all the while.
Some say that education is the process of learning what you don't know.
I think that my experience here coroborates that statement.
That's what keeps it interesing and fun.
You've just discovered the magic key that opens a vault chock-a-block full of the objects of your life long natural desire.
Add to this realization that what you've discovered and are doing often feeds a latent rebellious nature as well as your ego, and you have found one of the most powerfully addictive activities to be had.
It would be wise to set spending limits; weekly, monthly, per session, etc. For many an otherwise prudent man has looked back after his first year in the hobby and found he happily let tens of thousands of dollars pass from his hand in his eagerness to use and re-use the key.
Participating in these discussion boards will avail tons of information while affording a comradely with others, and sometimes a placebo of sorts when you wish you were hobbying; but the time or resources are not right.
In the fullness of time, save for possible, latent, psychological or emotional deficiencies you'll find a comfortable balance between your wants, your needs, and your resources.
Thanks for the insight! MrFisher and Grounds for Gynophobia - you have been very helpful! I do need balance and focus! Once I got here- I started reading reviews - became an VIP member - posted my first experiences and then started searching and adding people to favorites! All of the sudden - I was deciding who do I meet next since they were so many great ladies out there! Next thing I know - I had sixty people in my favorites! And am caught in decision - decision - decision! But I know - it is just me!
I love reading the reviews and participatng in discussions - the insights are great! Yes - it is the psychic that gets you - need to overcome that!
Thanks for your help - which is why I asked the question! As a newbie you discover this and then all of ths sudden - your life takes on new meaning - which many will never understand!
Random thoughts - been at it a little over a year - have spent so much $$ I don't even want to count - binged for quite a while - recognize I am addicted and it will fuck up my life if I don't control it - made a few good friends who I love spending time with - not looking for new gals anymore - now once a month with an old pal (well, maybe twice a month if funds allow). If you have significant discretionary funds, you are a kid in a candy store. If not, self-control is more important. TER feeds the addiction - if I spent all the time working that I spend on TER, I'd have a lot more hobby money. After years of little and hum-drum sex, acting out your porn fantasies regularly with beautiful, willing women is impossible to stop.
Sounds like you need to go pound out some miles on the old bike. Ride 'till you brain shuts down!
Yes - that would be a good think to do!
I'm relatively new to the hobby--since July and do find it addicting. After binging for the first month I established a baseline of good vs mediore providers. At that point I decided to reserve myself for the hot providers that may come through with great reviews, especially the visiting ones. After a while you'll probably come to see that many providers are not as good as their ads suggest and then you'll slow things down a bit and be more selective--you need to know what really turns you on in a provider.
If you recognize the problem, then you're on step ahead of many others.
Enjoy (in moderation)