A number of providers responded to my original post suggesting that this provider may have gotten burnt before with refs, which is why she did not accept them; a reasonable assumption. But, a fellow hobbyist correctly guessed which provider I was discussing and pointed out that her screening requirements (bio info + cc deposit, no refs required) were actually identical to that of at least a dozen other providers with websites that have an identical setup. The link seems to be that they all have one or two reviewers in common. I'll leave it to each person to draw their own conclusion as to what that suggests.
I've only been hobbying for a little over a year but have had the chance to meet many wonderful ladies and thought I had a pretty good understanding of how things generally work in terms of verification. I know that each provider has their own preferred method, but nearly all have asked for a few recent references from established providers. These days, most of the providers I see verify me through p411 or, if they're not listed there, through a list of references I send. So, I was little surprised last week to encounter a young lady, who has a couple of good reviews here but shall remain nameless, who actually told me that she had no use for any of my references. We had agreed on a time to meet the next day, but before she would give me her incall intersection, she asked me to fill out the form on her website to "guarantee her safety and that i will compensate her for her time". As I was not in a convenient location to get to her website and fill in some form, I sent her a list I keep conveniently on email of 14 providers I've seen in the past year who can be used as references. They include the TER top-rated providers in Boston and Chicago, as well as several very recognizable names in NYC. I also mentioned to her that I was fine with postponing our date until she had time to thoroughly verify me through my references, as it was important to me for her to feel safe and comfortable if/when we meet. I was shocked when she responded that "I have no time to reach out to people with whom I have no relationship... I would never expect a stranger to vouch for my safety or be able to guarantee you will compensate me for me time."
At that point, the inconvenience of filling out her online form became secondary to my disbelief at her statement that references were of no value to her. Obviously references are only as good as the provider they come from. But, am I crazy to think that a provider would make a blanket statement that a reference was useless unless it came from someone with whom they have a close personal relationship?
I went back to look at her form more closely and it basically requires some biographical info (name, race, age, phone, occupation) and then "authentication" which can come in the form of providing work contact info or making a CC/Debit deposit. How any of this guarantees her safety, is beyond me. But ultimately, she's free to set any rules she wants and I'm free to chose not to play, which is what I did.
It was my first experience with a provider who has no use for references and I just wondered whether others have come across this as well.
There are a very few girls i will accept references from because many will ok a john with out seeing him more then once, or do little to no screening. When it comes to my safety i only will allow references from someone just as well known or better well known then me. The idea that she wouldn't accept refernces from girls that are well known is just beyond shocking to me.
I only accept references from girls who are currently advertising and well reviewed
I almost never accept references because they normally have no id who you are
I use my real info when I check into a hotel
I expect to know who the guys is when he comes to my in cal
How will you know who he is? If his references don't remember him, that's another problem altogether, which I've never had. Even assuming you know who he is, how does that necessarily make you safe? Not saying axe murderers are around every corner, but sh*t happens. I'd think you'd want several reputable providers who've seen him to vouch for him.
As stated in the previous reply, I still do my own screening because another provider can't assure my own safety better than myself. I only provide reference to someone I have seen on numerous occasions. You can't really okay someone based on one visit. Plus that provider might not have done any screening
I totally agree and i get tired of trying to explain this to guys
If provider who is established, active on the boards, not to mention smoking hot like you 
, is asking for a lot personal info for screening, that's one thing; worth considering at the very least. But, when a relative newcomer with just a couple of reviews is asking for all your personal info, that's another issue altogether. I would think guys treat different providers' requests differently.
-- Modified on 8/11/2014 10:45:06 AM
... however there have been many scams that sound very similar.
On BP, there are a number of "ladies" who will ask for your credit card number as verification. It should be no surprise that no session takes place afterwards, however you will be spending plenty of time speaking to your credit company about mysterious charges.
I'm guessing she has had bad experiences in the past that make her so cautious, and (it seems) a little angry.
and I also provide references.Speaking for myself I do ask for references from reputable ladies with a web presence.But,if a gent has references and the reference is taking long to respond or if the references are old there is always alternative methods for screening.I know a few ladies like this they do not ask for references and will only accept references from providers who they know personally.
If the guy provides references they will verify him another way besides asking for references.
Some have had bad experience with the reference system so they choose a different route.
I don't know if this was the case for the lady you mentioned but if she has reviews and is reputable she probably has other ways to verify you without waiting for a reference that may or may not get back to her.
I don't know how paying a deposit via cc would be a means to verify but hey if it works for her.
Every lady is different on how she runs her business.
A number of providers responded to my original post suggesting that this provider may have gotten burnt before with refs, which is why she did not accept them; a reasonable assumption. But, a fellow hobbyist correctly guessed which provider I was discussing and pointed out that her screening requirements (bio info + cc deposit, no refs required) were actually identical to that of at least a dozen other providers with websites that have an identical setup. The link seems to be that they all have one or two reviewers in common. I'll leave it to each person to draw their own conclusion as to what that suggests.
On that note, who would honestly just give out their CC info like that? I understand (kinda) if it is kinda via a secure payment processor like paypal (discretely) or whatever but still really?
I have a hard time using my card in stores let alone just giving out the number in an unsecured format online...
If someone used a lady with that type of screening + the 'boilerplate' website as a reference, I wouldn't even respond back. Please fill out my form with EVERYTHING I asked for and try again later. Like others, my screening is gold to me.
Just my thoughts....
To clarify, the website requires a deposit, but billing is done via Paypal (according to the site, I never got that far).
Also, given that she doesn't accept references, I doubt she would provide one, nor, do I suspect, would anyone use her as such.
I will accept references from providers who are well reviewed and have a website or an eros ad. I might be a snob but i do not accept references from BP girls. i do try to explain to the clients that i am not being intrusive just safe and the more comfortable i feel will mean a better time for us both.
I am always quick to provide a reference and i have been lucky my requests for references have also been for the most part responded to in a timely manner. And if they can provide a little info on the client beyond they have seen him and he is nice. Recent responses to my requests for a references included that the client loves red wine ( i ran out and grabbed a bottle) or that the client was very well endowed and i should be prepared
One thing i love is when the client emails me with his references and their contact info it really helps to expedite things. I much prefer that to "i am white listed" for me that is not enough. I am still confused about white listing. I have had times when i have seen a client once and they want to be white listed i prefer to white list after i have seen them a few times
Holly
client to future providers, and (if visible) gives credibility to the reviewer that it's not just a fake review.
With your rationale of needing to see a client a few times before White Listing, suppose Reviewers decided to see a provider a few times before writing a review? That provider might never have a review .... or only a few.
BTW, I like a dry white wine ;