Sounds like an ideal way to recruit a civvie. I'm thinking the non-professional nature would have upside and downside. Looks like you got all the upside. Cheers.
Recognizing that every provider was once a civvie, has any hobbyist here had experience, good or bad, with trying to recruit a civvie? So, I'm not naive enough to ignore that 99.99% or more of the time, this is likely to lead to getting ripped off. I think I avoid the risk of LE or Craigslist type of tragedy since I'm actively going out and recruiting as opposed to posting or responding to an ad. So, I'm thinking of this more as an experiment and only gambling what I can afford to lose without crying over it, but here's the scenario. I find a girl I like on a sex chat site and chat her up for a period of a couple of weeks, feeling her out on the possibility of meeting. As a rule, I would guess, girls on these sites have ruled out providing. Most girls will blow you off. You should blow off the ones that say "yes" right away as they are full of shit and/or have some ulterior motive. The ideal candidate will say you're crazy but leave the door open. Having tried this for several months, I've considered and dismissed several girls because, as I got to know them better, I had a feeling they were not serious about going through with it. However, I currently have a plausible candidate and am carefully planning out the logistics of the next few steps which will hopefully, eventually, lead to us meeting.
Obviously, I've thought about many of the potential pitfalls here. But, I'd like to hear any thoughts, good, bad or indifferent about such an undertaking from both hobbyists and providers who care to opine. Feel free to say I'm a complete idiot, but please elaborate on exactly why, besides the reasons I've mentioned.
no one needs a pimp.
The only client I'm looking to recruit her for is myself.
aka: pumping
I was out to dinner with a hot latina escort well over a year ago. Waitress hit on my date. Finally hooked up with her after much 3way chat several months later. Had two escorts 'screen' her via a night out on the town. Still banging her as recently as a week ago. Young. Hot bod. Wide open menu. And very well priced. Just loves sex. Great attitude
Sounds like an ideal way to recruit a civvie. I'm thinking the non-professional nature would have upside and downside. Looks like you got all the upside. Cheers.
Initially there was some downside. Asked for more 'opportunities' than I was initially willing to provide. I was moving slow. She had financial 'issues' and had to educate her they weren't my 'issues.' After a good talkling to, in a paternalistic way, she started to catch on. Some immaturity on occasion but not of late. And I'm not convinced there isn't a BF lurking which makes me nervous. But its been a year and it keeps on getting better and better. She gives amazing head. First time I saw her alone, after swallowing, she looked up at me and said "Oh, my. I don't even do that for my BF." Totally hot. And she's Asian Indian. A bucket list checkoff. Been a good arrangement.
Who knows if it's true or not about not swallowing with the BF, but I can see how there are some things women would do in p4p arrangement that they might not do in a relationship, just because it's easier to rationalize.
Either way, nice gig dude.
Merits other than your disposable income, that is.
On those occasions when I hook up outside the hobby, the last thing I would do is try to recruit her to become a provider, even just for me. Those worlds are separate.
Let us know how it turns out, I'll bet the charge of getting her to cross the line far outweighs getting laid, which is really what the hobby is all about for most of us.
She has a look that I really like and haven't come across in any provider. And, I'm willing to p4p so that I don't have to bs her into sleeping with me for free and she goes away when we are done. Not sure what you mean by the "charge" outweighing "getting laid". I would argue that the hobby is not just about getting laid, but getting laid, on-demand, without effort (other than setting up the session) with a girl whose looks and services you like and then having her go away. That's the purpose of the donation. Of course, if you're getting that for free, kudos to you.
I would expect there to be many more misses than home runs with that method.
Plus I am not sure why you think "As a rule, I would guess, girls on these sites have ruled out providing."
Seasoned providers could be on those sites looking for naive guys with excess cash that they can dupe into thinking a great session is on tap when they hate dfk and only give a lame condom BJ. They can invent a new identity and not have to deal with the hassle of bad reviews getting in the way.
where girls are offering to meet up with you for dfk and bbbj. Haven't really been active for the last couple of years, but, in four years of frequenting sex chats on and off, I've never once had a girl offer to meet up. And as for providers working those sites, unless you're a porn star, most providers wouldn't roll out of bed for the money you make on those sites. Also re-read my OP regarding probability of success. I do agree it's a lot of time and effort for unknown result. That's part of the thrill; a hobby within the hobby. Admittedly not for everyone, or even most.
A friend told me that at the end of a date a guy offered her $2000 to sleep with her. She was thoroughly pissed off. Nothing is simple. You should forget about her.
hence the key word "recruiting" someone who's already in the business of selling sexual fantasies as opposed to propositioning a random civvie. But, thanks for sharing.
You are paying for that feeling that you might win-- but actually winning the Lottery is out of the question. I get it, in this case you are in the middle of an interesting hunt and that's a lot of what this is about. The hunt. My suggestion is to take your preferred endpoint of wooing a civvie out of it --that's tawdry--and surprise her with an X roses gift when you meet, but only as icing if you have begun to deepen your connection. You need to woo her, that's it--pay later, you don't need to say why or what for--but you both will know. A little allowance might goes a long way!
...several years ago. The young lady in question was "discovered" via CL, but it otherwise was very close to the situation you're shooting for.
Somehow or other, he read between the lines of her CL ad, made contact with her, and she basically became an always on-call GFE for him. An overnight, a weekend, no problem. They rarely went out in public, but she would come to his house, they'd cook something or order in, maybe watch a movie, have some private time, hit the sack, wake up in the AM, have some more private time, and then she'd be on her way (sometimes she even helped him with cleaning his house! Seriously!); and they never had any agreed-upon rate. The first time they did this, he hemmed and hawed, didn't know what to give her, and then offered her an amount of money that was shockingly small--and she was more than ok with it.
There was enough of a gap in age and whatever other factors people consider when embarking on a "real" relationship that he never "went there"--but it was a fantastic arrangement for him that lasted a good four or five months.
What she got out of it? I'm really not sure. I think it may have been the need for only a couple of extra bucks (and maybe avoiding thinking of herself as "that kind of girl" since she only had one client), and a natural curiosity on her part about what that kind of career/lifestyle would be like--sort of a "try anything once" mentality.
I sort of understand what you want here because of my friend's experience--but gee whiz, that is like lightning in a bottle. I think you could go five lifetimes and never come across another situation like that.
Good luck....
On a civilian date you don't know what is going to happen. Maybe she likes you maybe she doesn't. Maybe you split dinner and have sex for three days maybe you pay for dinner and get the brush off. It's all unknown. But, other than the occasional dinner, it's free.
With an escort you know exactly what you are getting. But you are paying for it.
On a civilian date, you can ask out any woman in the world. She can say no. But you're not limited. You can also ask for anything. Anal, S&M, call you daddy. She can say no. But there are no rules.
With an escort you are limited to what women will agree to and the women who are willing to be escorts.
On a civilian date it's about what you both want. With an escort it's about what you want, within her rules.
You are trying to get the best of both possible worlds. You want to pay a woman who has not decided to be an escort to do what you want. This is her decision. Not yours.
I'm not sure I follow you exactly on the differences between civvie dating and P4P. P4P or not, I can't get any woman to do what she doesn't want. And, just as in a relationship, with an escort you can ask for whatever you want, whether you get it is another issue. I find it funny when I read that so and so escort is YMMV. In my experience, it's all YMMV. Just because an escort "does" greek, doesn't mean she's going to offer it to every guy who wants it, every time.
As far as civvie dating being "not limited" vs. P4P, I would guess that the average escort has a much wider menu than the average civvie (see USGrantlover's comments about his former civvie turned P4P with the wide open menu).
Finally, as to whether I'm looking for P4P with a woman who hasn't decided to be an escort, that's correct, but if/when we do meet, she will have crossed over. The recruiting process is about just that; getting her to voluntarily cross over.
Definition of a pimp:
a criminal who is associated with, usually exerts control over, and lives off the earnings of one or more prostitutes
a) I do not, nor will I commit any crimes
b) I exert no coercion. Quite to the contrary, this only works for me if everything is voluntary
c) I have no interest in any share of earnings. I'm actually providing the earnings (for companionship, of course)
You still don't get it. I just want to be the first, and possibly only, client. Was your first client a pimp?
If after our encounter she decides to go back to civvie life, fantastic. If on the other hand she decides to do what you do for a living, more power to her. Either way, I'll be out of the picture.
Read USGrantlover's post about his success in recruiting a civvie. That's all I want. No pimpin'. But, if you're looking for one, I might be able to recommend a guy with very reasonable rates 