...however, this site would cease to be useful if we only shared our positive ones. While I don't have to, I do feel some obligation to give back and share my experiences...the good, the bad and the ugly...it takes courage to share unpleasant truths...but you can do so without being unpleasant... in the long run, it is the best course to take IMO.
-- Modified on 2/8/2015 5:47:48 PM
I obviously go into each rendezvous hoping for an excellent experience, but sometimes it's less than great. I feel obliged to leave an honest review, even if the experience was middling, but should I bother? It seems to just lead to grief and hate mail from the aggrieved provider.
It was my impression that writing a review was important to help educate fellow mongers. We read reviews in order to get some idea of what to expect when we see a provider for the first time. I always felt that the best review is an honest review. Well my honesty cost me! A while back I wrote an honest review of a terrible provider. What I didn't realize was that many providers read these reviews, too. Consequently, one of my favorite providers who I had seen many times, got so upset reading what I had written about this other woman that she decided to not see me any more! I don't know why it hadn't occurred to me that providers read reviews, too, but they do. They are as busy judging us mongers by what we've written as we are judging them by what other have written. So let that be a word of caution.
write bad reviews of bad providers.
By helping to eliminate the bad providers, these reviews bring more business to the good ones.
Too bad that some providers apparently don't understand this.
I will not use names here but let me do tell you a reverse story...
All of my screening and appointment bookings is done through Chloe, however if someone messages me on TER I will generally respond and ask that they contact her directly as I am not local to the area and when home do not have much correspondence with anyone.
So last week I received an appointment request through my website, the gentleman didn't pick a day that I was in New England and all appointment forms are set to auto forward to Chloe. I didn't worry about needing to respond. However that afternoon the gentleman in question messaged me directly on TER asking for an appointment. I explained he had to contact Chloe and went from there. Once I saw him on my appointment calendar for later in the week, since he is not active on any boards, I read his reviews.
I was genuinely concerned that I wasn't going to be able to provide him with the kind of appointment that he desired. In fact I was so distraught about it, I messaged him back and kindly explained to him that I would love to still see him, but was very concerned his appetite for certain items would not be getting filled. He never responded back to me but did come to his appointment. When he arrived, I needed to be fully honest with him or else it would have made for a bad time. I sat him down and kindly asked if he had read my email. He stated he had not, but asked what it was about. I told him that I will read a few of the person's last reviews to make sure that it will be a good fit, see if I can get a feel for what they may be looking for, or even if their personality will come through. He said he understood my concerns but still wanted to proceed.
Overall I think the appointment went well. I did very much so enjoy his company and after we got that out of the way, I can only hope he appreciated my honestly, concern, and candor.
For me, I actually enjoy this work. I am not a full time provider and doubt that I will ever be again. But the review system is a two way street. I do think that if a provider is a bait & switch, just poor in all areas from presentation to performance, or is misrepresenting in any way then by all means. But also think about it you may have not done enough research to make a good match.
Just my two cents. I do hope you all stay happy and warm. I hate to hear of negative things happening to both the men and ladies. Just try to pair yourself with someone of like mind and it should just be a natural fit.
Yours-
Kristi
for just the reasons you mention.
It helps everyone avoid misunderstandings.
I left a bad review and it was denied. I can't figure out why.
This woman had open sores. I don't get it.
As long as it is a honest review, I say write it! This is the only way for others to know what they might expect. I always feel honesty is the best policy. It can help others from falling into the same situation. Just like a good reviews points us in the right direction. A bad review can be written tastefully.
Then you do not get any feed back. Just wait a short while so the provider does not necessarily equate the review to you.
You don't have to be mean spirited about it. Also realize that not everybody will connect. I saw a provider that had great reviews but when I saw her my experience was mediocre at best. And my review reflected that. When you write the review don't do it to hurt her feelings do it to educate us.
...however, this site would cease to be useful if we only shared our positive ones. While I don't have to, I do feel some obligation to give back and share my experiences...the good, the bad and the ugly...it takes courage to share unpleasant truths...but you can do so without being unpleasant... in the long run, it is the best course to take IMO.
-- Modified on 2/8/2015 5:47:48 PM