Erotic Humor

If dear abby was a man
mnpacman 16060 reads
posted

Dear Mr. Abby:
>
>          Q: My husband wants a threesome with my best friend and me.
>
>          A: Obviously your husband cannot get enough
>             of you! Knowing that there is only one of you
>             he can only settle for the next best thing -
>             your best friend. Far from being an issue, this can bring
>             you closer together. Why not get some of your old
>             college roommates involved too? If you are
>             still apprehensive, maybe you should let him be with your
>             friends without you. If you're still not sure then
>             just perform oral sex on him and cook him a nice meal
>             while you think about it.
>
>
>          Dear Mr. Abby:
>
>          Q: My husband continually asks me to perform oral sex on
him.
>
>          A: Do it. Sperm can help you lose weight and gives a great
>             glow to your skin. Interestingly, men know this.  His
>             offer to allow you to perform oral sex on him is totally
>             selfless. This shows he loves you. The best thing to
>             do is to thank him by performing it twice a day, then
>             cook him a nice meal.
>
>
>          Dear Mr. Abby:
>
>          Q: My husband has too many nights out with the boys.
>
>          A: This is perfectly natural behavior and it should be
>             encouraged. The man is a hunter and he needs to prove
>             his prowess with other men. A night out chasing young
>             single girls is a great stress relief and can foster a
>             more peaceful and relaxing home. Remember, nothing can
>             rekindle your relationship better than the man being
>             away for a day or two (it's a great time to clean
>             the house too)! Just look at how emotional and happy he
>             is when he returns to his stable home. The best thing to
>             do when he gets home is for you and your best friend to
>             perform oral sex on him. Then cook him a nice meal.
>
>
>          Dear Mr. Abby:
>
>          Q: My husband doesn't know where my clitoris is.
>
>
>          A: Your clitoris is of no concern to your husband. If you
>             must mess with it, do it in your own time or ask your
>             best friend to help. You may wish to videotape yourself
>             while doing this, and present it to your husband as a
>             birthday gift. To ease your selfish guilt,perform oral
>             sex on him and cook him a delicious meal.
>
>
>          Dear Mr. Abby:
>
>          Q: My husband is uninterested in foreplay.
>
>          A: You are a bad person for bringing it up and should seek
>             sensitivity training. Foreplay to a man is very stressful
>             and time consuming. Sex should be available to your
>             husband on demand with no pesky requests for foreplay.
>             What this means is that you do not love your man as much
>             as you should - he should never have to work to get you
>             in the mood. Stop being so selfish! Perhaps you can
>             make it up to him by performing oral sex on him and
>             cook him a nice meal.
>
>          Dear Mr. Abby:
>
>          Q: My husband always has an orgasm then rolls over and
>             goes to sleep never giving me one.
>
>          A: I'm not sure I understand the problem.  Perhaps you've
>             forgotten to cook him a nice meal.
>

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