Hi all,
I've been in and out of the hobby for 9 years now. It has made it difficult to find referrals as usually I get ignored or they don't remember me when I ask. I'm trying to get back into hobby yet again now and I found a provider that supposedly was noob friendly. I contacted and exchanged a couple emails, and provided a bunch of info on my employer as requested and waited for verification. I didn't hear anything back, so I emailed after 4 days asking if I was still being verified. Still nothing. Then emailed again a week after that because I realized part of verification might be talking to our HR Manager who had been on vacation, so I let them know that she was back.
Four more days go by and I figured by this point I was banned for some reason, so I just emailed again to ask what I did wrong, but never received a reply to any of the emails. Now a month later, I'm quite sure I'm being ignored, so I'm moving on, but just curious if anyone has any insight. I'm 10000% legit, so I know if they actually called to verify me, they could have (once the HR person was back if that's what they waited for). I didn't say anything shady in emails and was respectful. I don't want to name the provider (again, just trying to be respectful), but any thoughts? If someone is calling an employer for verification, are they just calling to verify I am real and work there?
No way in hell would I give out employment info
What the hell were you thinking???
Join a verification sight like p411 or date-check. It's worth it and will make it a lot easier to schedule with newbie-friendly providers. My
I just did this, newb, getting into it for the first time just a few weeks ago. I searched the reviews and went with a highly rated provider who had several years of reviews. She wanted employment phone and photo of driver's lisc. The fact that she had good reviews for so many years was enough to keep me from worrying. You don't get that by being a flake. I had a nice time with her. My second ref was similarly a long time provider with favorable reviews. She has her own screening methods which she didn't reveal to me.
With those two, I got whitelisted here and also free 6 months at P411.
-- Modified on 3/31/2016 1:07:24 AM
Wait until she gets mad at you for whatever reason, then your fucked. Don't care how long or highly she's rated, they'll fucked you over in a heart beat.
Posted By: lester_prairie
I just did this, newb, getting into it for the first time just a few weeks ago. I searched the reviews and went with a highly rated provider who had several years of reviews. She wanted employment phone and photo of driver's lisc. The fact that she had good reviews for so many years was enough to keep me from worrying. You don't get that by being a flake. I had a nice time with her. My second ref was similarly a long time provider with favorable reviews. She has her own screening methods which she didn't reveal to me.
With those two, I got whitelisted here and also free 6 months at P411.
-- Modified on 3/31/2016 1:07:24 AM
Anything is possible. But I'd have to go with highly improbable. Firstly because I know myself. I have an easy going personality and don't really acquire enemies (except on Internet political discussions, but that's for sport. 
) Secondly because I generally like and respect anyone who treats me fairly. So I would be unlikely to do them wrong intentionally and would quickly act to address anything done unintentionally. Thirdly, anyone in the business that long with an unsullied record is really not the type to flake for no reason. So in my particular case, I feel adequately safe. I could be hit by a meteor tomorrow, of course. Unlikely, though.
Posted By: talon199094
Wait until she gets mad at you for whatever reason, then your fucked. Don't care how long or highly she's rated, they'll fucked you over in a heart beat.
Posted By: lester_prairie
I just did this, newb, getting into it for the first time just a few weeks ago. I searched the reviews and went with a highly rated provider who had several years of reviews. She wanted employment phone and photo of driver's lisc. The fact that she had good reviews for so many years was enough to keep me from worrying. You don't get that by being a flake. I had a nice time with her. My second ref was similarly a long time provider with favorable reviews. She has her own screening methods which she didn't reveal to me.
With those two, I got whitelisted here and also free 6 months at P411.
-- Modified on 3/31/2016 1:07:24 AM
It may be unlikely but there have been a few providers with "breakdowns" the last few years so I'd personally feel better if they had none of my real info. Drugs, stress (financial and otherwise), medical issues, menopause, etc. all play a part and I don't want to be around and on their radar when it does.
Mr. Timer
Posted By: lester_prairie
Anything is possible. But I'd have to go with highly improbable. Firstly because I know myself. I have an easy going personality and don't really acquire enemies (except on Internet political discussions, but that's for sport.
) Secondly because I generally like and respect anyone who treats me fairly. So I would be unlikely to do them wrong intentionally and would quickly act to address anything done unintentionally. Thirdly, anyone in the business that long with an unsullied record is really not the type to flake for no reason. So in my particular case, I feel adequately safe. I could be hit by a meteor tomorrow, of course. Unlikely, though.
Posted By: talon199094
Wait until she gets mad at you for whatever reason, then your fucked. Don't care how long or highly she's rated, they'll fucked you over in a heart beat.
Posted By: lester_prairie
I just did this, newb, getting into it for the first time just a few weeks ago. I searched the reviews and went with a highly rated provider who had several years of reviews. She wanted employment phone and photo of driver's lisc. The fact that she had good reviews for so many years was enough to keep me from worrying. You don't get that by being a flake. I had a nice time with her. My second ref was similarly a long time provider with favorable reviews. She has her own screening methods which she didn't reveal to me.
With those two, I got whitelisted here and also free 6 months at P411.
-- Modified on 3/31/2016 1:07:24 AM
It seems to me you were very understanding of the ladies need to screen you to her satisfaction probably because you have been in and out of the hobby so much and for so long. I am sure it was appreciated. However, after 4 days of no response, I think you would be safe to assume either :
1. she's not interested in meeting (in which case, she should have told you so)
2. she has had personal issues come up and is not able to reply
3. The number and frequency of your emails has caused her concern.
4. she is lousy at the business side of the business.
Regardless of which is true, I recommend you move on.
As far as how employment verification works, it's different for different ladies and not something I care to go into detail
on a public board.
Find a gal who is truly newbie friendly, find out what she needs for verification, and, then either email her the info or don't.
Every one has to do what they feel comfortable doing ---- and that goes both ways
Besides give out your employment info, which IMHO is always a risky move. Definitely time to move on. I second the idea of joining P411 or a similar verification site.
Sorry you were flaked on .
Xoxo
Sorry she won't get back to you--especially when you gave out important personal info. That was not very professional of her. I usually go with a three strikes rule. After trying three times, I give up. The provider might have gotten a bad feeling about me, one of my references didn't respond, or something else. There are many more out there, so it's probably better to move on.
My first time out I provided my Facebook info because it was the only thing I had. I didn't know about p411 and I was being cheap. I wish I hadn't because now that info is out there. I don't know who has it or what was done with it. That was a couple years ago, so I hope it was lost or destroyed.
The P411 route is probably best for you. They state that they destroy your personal info after they verify you. I have no way to verify that, though. Unless you're going the unreviewed BP provider route, you'll probably have to trust somebody with some of your personal info.
Good luck and stay safe
-- Modified on 3/31/2016 11:55:14 AM
Newbies do not have to begin by giving out personal info. Start with an experienced massage provider who is prepared to take you as a newbie without extra verification (there are several of them) and she, if she is willing, will become your first reference.
Thanks for the replies. I will add, similar to someone else said, this is a highly rated, long time provider, so I felt comfortable giving out employment info. Plus I feel comfortable enough in my position that even had they tried anything funky, I would be able to blow it off with the powers that be. Thank you for the suggestions, my concern with sites like P411, I thought I remember that those sites can be raided by police, thus not secure either? Am I wrong there?
According to the claims on P411 (which I can't verify) there is no instance of a client of P411 getting busted by the police because of P411 info. Not so, unfortunately for providers. Apparently some providers were lax in giving okays to LE posing as clients and got p411 verified, thus leading LE to the doors of providers
If LE is willing to devote enough resources they can do this sort of thing. But it takes more time and manpower and the return on investment based on arrests is less than your typical BP bust.
That makes it a lot harder for US LE to do anything to them. Not impossible of course but there is a reason why increasingly sites related to hobbying and escorting keep their servers outside the US.
I can see you going to HR to ask them if the escort you were trying to see has contacted them and if they put a good word in for you.
You told someone who you will never see basically your whole life story.
Posted By: sweetromantic
You told someone who you will never see basically your whole life story.
Yeah, but if that didn't put them over the edge, nothing will.
before all this stuff. Just walked in a room, picked a girl and paid some money? But they had some security in the houses or what. Any old timers know. Pluses and - now i guess
I'd have reconnected with a lady from the past, then use her as a reference. If she's willing to do so.
As to employment info, I was in the same boat. A well reviewed lady's screening involved employment check too.
I wasn't thinking right so I gave her my info, position in company, best time to call, site address of company, and work email.
In this instance she turned out to be legit. I never gave out my work info since then.
my real life and my hobby life would have ZERO overlap. Ever.
I'm talking $200 laptop paid with cash, burn phone, only wifi from starbucks and such, hushmail, the whole works. I get ads on the sidebar of my computer about all kinds of stuff that's real to me, but have no idea how they found it. This is far beyond cookies.
I fully expect some someday in the future people being able to "mine" the internet for fossils. Things we thought were looong gone will come back. Much like DNA testing changed crime investigation. Think about it, a crime committed 20 years ago perfectly executed to the tech of their day can be solved now.
I may not have a t-rex fossil in my history, but maybe a few pterodactyls...
This hobby is nuclear half life. It never goes away, only decays at a perpetually slowing rate.
-Mr Butts
There's a relatively now technology called "big data". In the past, in order to conduct a search, the data had to be structured in a database and a search done using the same software. With big data, emails, sms messages, Word documents, Excel spreadsheets, PDF files, and virtually any other format can be searched for words, phrases, phone numbers, email addresses, etc. including partial matches. Google Analytics is one implementation but there are others. The only thing we hobbyists have going for ourselves is that as long as there are terrorists, the authorities will always have bigger fish to fry. On a semi-related note... Oracle, the world's biggest software company, began with a contract with DOD and CIA to develop data analysis software.
