I appreciate hearing that. I think you're right that it will help me determine her interest in me... whether there's a real connection or if she sees me as just a payday. Of course, I hope it's the former, but my gut says it maybe the latter. I'll try not to read too much into it and I will probably continue to see her (for a little while at least) but it will definitely put things in perspective that she's not the unicorn I thought she might be.
Thanks for the feedback!Wondering if any of you guys communicate with your SBs (email, text, chat) outside of making plans to see each other? I am more of an LTA-type guy. I like to find that 1 (maybe 2 tops) SB that I have good chemistry with to see more or less exclusively until the relationship runs its course. I have my current SB that I've been with a few times so far. I only see her about every 3-4 weeks. I'd like to be able to check-in with her in between our dates just to say hi, see how she's doing, and if of course flirt a bit to keep the interest up until our next date. So far our communications by email in between dates have been fairly brief and mostly consisted of times and places we will meet up.
That being said, this is an NSA thing, so I also don't want to give the appearance that I'm clingy or like I'm emailing or texting her all the time (which of course I wouldn't be). I'd like to have a genuine friendship/connection with her for as long as it lasts and I think that is knowing each other better will also help build our intimacy.
Thoughts on how to go about this in a subtle, non-obtrusive way? Maybe I'm overthinking it, but was just curious what's others' protocol was for this sort of thing. If it helps, she's about 30 y.o. rather than 18-19.
-- Modified on 10/22/2016 10:59:49 AM
I've got a local SB that we go our merry way after we meet, but as a follow on to setting up our next date, she will want to chat a bit about what's been going on since we last met. Usually very short.
I've got two POT SBs that seem to like chatting leading up to our dates. More than just the get to know you. One sent me a very nice seductive photo of her in bed. Nothing raunchy just taunting of might be to come.
I had one that would just want to drop by. Another that liked to come over to jacuzzi. Not always sex involved. Nevet money.
EVERBODY in my life needs to call before "dropping by" I don't what to have to explain to one SB why she can't come in the house because I was balls deep in another woman before I was so rudely interrupted by the doorbell.
Coming by on five minutes notice is fine, but that gives me an opportunity to make a better excuse if I am "busy" lol
Even my business partner knows to call before coming over, He knows there is always a fifty fifty chance I have some woman with me if I am at home.
Oh no. Always would call first to see if Im free.
Coming by on five minutes notice is fine, but that gives me an opportunity to make a better excuse if I am "busy" lol
Even my business partner knows to call before coming over, He knows there is always a fifty fifty chance I have some woman with me if I am at home.
Coming by on five minutes notice is fine, but that gives me an opportunity to make a better excuse if I am "busy" lol
Even my business partner knows to call before coming over, He knows there is always a fifty fifty chance I have some woman with me if I am at home.
I have one SB who is not typical of most girls as she does not do a lot of texting or email. she prefers to talk in person. Her lack of response to txt has had friends and family worried in the past. I'm used to it. I know that if i txt her it might take a day to hear back. But she reads them and is very reliable.
#2 I only txt or email to set up or cancel dates.
#3 Likes the flirty type txt every few days or so and will send sexy pics once a week or so between dates.
So I usually figure it out by sending them flirty comments and see how they respond. Things always seem to sort out. Otherwise, just ask them what they like. They always seem to like when I tell them they have a dazzling smile, brilliant eyes that are like the stars, etc. lol
I'd say you're over-thinking it. If you feel like checking in on her and saying hello, just do it. What are you afraid of? You're the man here. If she's not into that, it will be clear, and that will also be a good sign that she's just in it for the money (which may be fine for both of you). In my experience, the typical SB isn't a pro or semi-pro and likes to maintain contact in between meets and those can often be fun, casual conversations. I do find it's best to have some form of sexual innuendo when texting before the first meet, but after you've been intimate, anything light-hearted will do
I appreciate hearing that. I think you're right that it will help me determine her interest in me... whether there's a real connection or if she sees me as just a payday. Of course, I hope it's the former, but my gut says it maybe the latter. I'll try not to read too much into it and I will probably continue to see her (for a little while at least) but it will definitely put things in perspective that she's not the unicorn I thought she might be.
Thanks for the feedback!
Let her make the first move. Or send her an innocuous message and see what happens.
I hear of both extremes: Some SBs get in touch when they get horny or need some cash. Others maintain an ongoing conversation. I know some guys whose SBs text pretty much every day.
Just try to relax and stay cool.
Thanks for the feedback!
You guys are killing me lately with this stuff. Between this and all the recent I have fallen for a hooker threads...you met her as a Sb. You want to screw her, she wants money. Quit paying her and you'll figure it out so quickly...
Just be grateful she lets you "connect" with her lady parts for a fee and call it a day. Stay frosty boys.
Not everyone is playing in the Sugar Bowl for the same reasons. Some guys like the variety and the challenge of convincing a young 20 or 30 something to climb into bed with you. I like it for that reason too, BUT I personally also am looking for a more personal "friends with benefits" type relationships that some girls are offering. Like KL said, the GND with a libido. This is not something your going to get with hookers, and some SBs, you might find that you actually like them and want more emphasis on the "friend" part than you would with some random chick you are banging. There are a lot of guys out there who seek this and have found it in the Sugar Bowl.
Like I said in a previous thread, I would never call my SB my girlfriend, but there are Sugar relationships out there that will mimic a "boyfriend/girlfriend" relationship... with no strings and no monogamy. I think this dynamic is intriguing for a lot of guys bc we all start here on TER looking at hookers where you know it's physical only and you're cool with that. BUT with SBs, it's a whole different ballgame. I think you can find a personal connection with an SB if that's what you are looking for. That's the beauty of the Sugar Bowl... the sex is there, but the intimacy and friendship can be there too if you want that.
If you don't want that, that's cool too... but don't think or expect that what you want from the Sugar Bowl is going to be the same or even remotely related to what I want from the Sugar Bowl. I think you can have your cake and eat it too. If you want to nail a different SB every night if the week... Awesome. Go for it. But don't mock me bc I'm looking for something slightly different than what you're looking for. There are plenty of hot chicks to go around for all of us.
"Quit paying her and you'll figure it out so quickly..."
Again, I hear what you are saying, but consider this... the $$ is what keeps the relationship NSA. Let's say hypothetically that I did stop paying her and she was into me and we keep seeing each other... Well now instead of being my SB, now she's my girlfriend... and being that I'm married, I sure as hell cant have that bc with girlfriends come expectations. I don't have the time or want to deal with that, so the Sugar is what keeps the relationship centered, bc aside from the sex, you are paying for the privilege to NOT be her boyfriend but still be able to fuck and spend time with her but not have all of the obligations. The Sugar keeps everyone honest and even-keeled and sets expectations for everyone. You can still have a connection with someone and while still paying them to keep the relationship on an even-playing field.
I have one Sb right now who loves to stay in touch and asked me to send her pics while I'm out of town traveling. Another SB rarely communicates in any way except when we are setting up a date. And I had one ATf SB a while back who exchanged long thoughtful emails with me on a variety of subject of mutual interest.
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and thinking about my current "rotation" and looking at my phone's text log. It looks like one of my SB's and I talk almost daily and see each other about once a week. Another, I see about twice a week, and we only talk once or twice a week on top of that. I have a couple of POT SB's that I am talking to several times a day, but most of the SB's I am seeing right now are too young for us to have a lot to talk about.
Like you, I have had a few SB's where we had to switch from texting to emailing as our conversations were too long for texting, but those were the exception, not the rule. Most of my current SB's I only talk to when setting up a time to get together right now. As my rotation changes and the girls undoubtedly start becoming a bit older, most likely there will be one or two where we will have a lot to talk about,
well,I like to share my thought from woman side.
when this person show he pay attention to me,make me feel he really care about me .
my X SD,text me all the time,sometime just chat,sometime ask me what I am doing,we talk a lot of boring things.
after time to time,I am fall in love with him without prepare ,and he didn't know.
long story for short,all woman want feel be care about by someone,feel import to someone,feel special to someone.
most of men they always consider what they will get before they decide how to tread the woman,I suggest do opposite way.
and most of time the woman been catch by the man who is relentless chaser.
Back to your story,is really depends on you,which kind of relationship you want,then make it happe
Great advice. Thanks Theresa! Appreciate the feedback!